Ray of Sunshine

“Typical female!” James smirked at Lauren as they left Baskin Robbins and began the five mile walk back to the buses, ice cream in hand.
Lauren shook her head and responded defensively. “So what if I prefer to eat my ice cream with a spoon? I might be a girl, but I fail to see your point. I know guys who eat from a bowl rather than a cone.”
“Name one,” he challenged, and took a bite of his Vividly Vanilla.
She paused to think before answering with, “My brother.”
James cackled. “Maybe at home, but I’ve seen Andy with an ice cream cone in his hand before, plenty of times. You might want to retract that answer.”
Rolling her eyes was Lauren’s only response to this. He was right. As usual. This was going to be a long walk, she mused to herself.
Reading her expression, James couldn’t help but smile. He broke the silence with, “You know, we haven’t really talked lately, about life in general. How are you doing with all this?”
With a sigh, Lauren paused before responding. “Some days are better than others, but that’s just how life is to begin with. I mean, the past year has had its challenges and its high points alike, and yes there were times I had my doubts, but I think I’ve gotten the hang of it.” She smiled at her friend. “What about you? You’re always looking out for the rest of us, keeping us laughing and whatnot. How’re you doing?”
He took a large bite of his ice cream and swallowed quickly before he answered. “Honestly, I’m good. We all knew this wasn’t going to be easy, and we’ve come so far so fast that sometimes it’s a little intimidating, but we also know it’s not going to be this way forever, so we might as well enjoy the ride, right?”
Lauren took a bite of her Rocky Road and pondered this. He was right. Again. They’d come so far from the days of practicing in Harley’s basement. She recalled how hard they all saved up for the recording equipment, how hard they worked on the demo tape, and how nervous they all were when they finished it and sent it to Lava Records. When they got the phone call from Lava expressing the label company’s interest in them, they all agreed this is what they wanted, and so began the journey that had led them straight to the top of the charts three times in their first year. Nothing could’ve prepared them for such an honor. It had earned them two AMA nominations, and they looked forward to the event in a mere three months.
James nudged her arm to bring her back to reality. “So I was thinking,” he told her. “About that song we put on the back burner?”
“Oh yeah?” she replied.
“I think I know what’s wrong with it,” he said.
“Ok, what’s wrong with it?” she prompted.
“Nothing,” he answered. “It’s just not meant to have my voice behind it.”
Lauren knew exactly where he was going with that. “No.” she said, stopping in her tracks.
James turned to her and began to explain. “Think about it. Who knows the feelings expressed in that song better than you? Look me in the eye and tell me I’m wrong.”
Moments like this, when the words just won’t come when you need them to, Lauren had resolved long ago to just sing the words in your heart. Only this time the words in her heart were the words to the song in question.

~I’m not going back.
No I’m not going back. Oh..
The darkness keeps trying to pull me in
I’m stronger than that now, you’re not gonna win
I’ve found a light and I’m not alone anymore.
Don’t try to fill my head with the lies.
I’m not afraid, no fear in my eyes.
I’m not the same person you fooled before.
And I’m not going there again
I’ve come too far just to fall right back in
You can’t get to me now and that’s a fact
Cuz I’m not ever going back
Don’t try to remind me of my past mistakes
And take all of my failures and toss them away
Who I am now is stronger than who I was
Imma keep on moving where my light guides me
Gonna keep on rockin the new life I lead
Life’s too short to stay on the ground, and I got back up
And I’m not going there again.
I’ve come too far now to fall right back in
Now I finally got on the right track
And I’m not going back.
No I’m not going back
No I’m not going back.
Never going back, no.~

“THAT is what I’m talking about!” James cheered. When she frowned, he quickly added, “I’m just saying, I never could’ve pulled that off.”
Lauren started walking toward the buses that were now only half a mile away. A thought hit her, and she stopped and turned around, with a very serious expression on her face. “One condition.”
“Name it,” he agreed.
“It stays between us for now,” she told him. “It’s a good song, very rock n roll, and Mindy has been begging us to touch on this for a long time. But I’m not sure..” she trailed off, not knowing quite how to explain.
For once she was grateful James could read her like a book. He hugged her, saying, “I know. Okay. On the back burner for now. I promise.” With that, the two friends walked back to their buses.