Can't Get Next to You
There, she’d told someone.
Returning to the living room, two glasses and a bottle of wine in her hands. She passes a glass and the wine bottle to Duane Lee to open. He liked that she would let him do the manly things like opening jars and bottles and doors for that matter. His Ex was so fiercely independent that she often stated that she didn’t ‘need’ a man. He knew that Sutton was also a strong willed woman but not so much so that she wouldn’t let him be a man.
“Fill mine up!” Sutton tells him, interrupting his train of thought. “Listen,” Duane says gently touching her leg, “you don’t have to tell everything if you don’t want to; if anyone understands an absentee father, it’s me. Hell, mine missed my entire childhood.”
He felt her lean into him, resting her head on his shoulder. That familiar warm feeling spread throughout his entire body. That was it, he told himself; he was falling for her. “Duane?” he hears her say, his head jerks, breaking him away from his thoughts. “Yes?” he replies, looking down at her. “Can we just talk about this another day, I really don’t think I can tell you right now. I thought I was ready but I’m not.”
The pair said their goodbyes a little while later and Sutton decided to call it an early night. She climbed into her bed and opened her messages that she had received while Duane was there.
Hunter16: Hey Cutiepie! Well, I’m assuming you’re a cutiepie since I don’t really know what you look like! haha
Cutiepie02: Well thank you sir.
They bantered back and forth for a little while although Sutton’s heart just wasn’t in it tonight.
Hunter16: Is this a bad time? You aren’t as chatty as you usually are.
Cutiepie02: Oh. Sorry about that. Just have some family stuff going on.
Hunter16: anything you want to talk about?
Cutiepie02: Umm...I don’t know.
Hunter16: Well, I am all ears… or eyes!
Sutton chuckled to herself, at least he had a sense of humor. Closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose, she decided she would tell this complete stranger about her family. What difference would it make, she asked herself. It wasn’t like they would probably ever meet one another. And he wasn’t sitting right next to her like Duane had been. This somehow seemed easier.
Hunter16: You still there?
Cutiepie02: Yeah, sorry. Just thinking
Hunter16: That can be dangerous sometimes…
Cutiepie02: Especially when you’re thinking of the past and things you can’t change.
Hunter16: I totally understand that. Wanna tell me what’s going on?
Cutiepie02: Well… the short version is that I have no relationship with my parents or my brother anymore.
Hunter16: Sorry to hear that. :-(
Cutiepie02: I’m not. I left home at 15.
Hunter16: Wow. That had to be hard. I can’t imagine being on my own at that age.
Cutiepie02: It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
Hunter16: One of? I don’t know many things that would be much worse…
Cutiepie02: The reason I left is because I was raped by my brother and some of his friends when I was 14 and no one believed me.
There, she’d told someone. Sutton felt the sting of warm tears running down her cheeks, it was the first time she’d cried about the rape since the night it happened. She felt both relieved and hurt all over again. Placing her phone down on the nightstand she buried her face in her soft pillow and bawled. The weight of all the pain and fear she’d felt all those years ago was hitting her all over again.
She didn’t know how long she’d laid there crying into her pillow until she heard her alarm go off the next morning. Lifting her head off the pillow she felt like someone was beating a drum inside her brain. “Fuck.” she muttered pushing her hair out of eyes before reaching over to turn off the loud alarm.
The notification light on her phone was blinking, assuming it was from Hunter16, she ignored the little green light. She didn’t want to revisit their conversation from last night. No, today was a new day and it was time to put her happy face back on for all the world to see.
“Fill mine up!” Sutton tells him, interrupting his train of thought. “Listen,” Duane says gently touching her leg, “you don’t have to tell everything if you don’t want to; if anyone understands an absentee father, it’s me. Hell, mine missed my entire childhood.”
He felt her lean into him, resting her head on his shoulder. That familiar warm feeling spread throughout his entire body. That was it, he told himself; he was falling for her. “Duane?” he hears her say, his head jerks, breaking him away from his thoughts. “Yes?” he replies, looking down at her. “Can we just talk about this another day, I really don’t think I can tell you right now. I thought I was ready but I’m not.”
The pair said their goodbyes a little while later and Sutton decided to call it an early night. She climbed into her bed and opened her messages that she had received while Duane was there.
Hunter16: Hey Cutiepie! Well, I’m assuming you’re a cutiepie since I don’t really know what you look like! haha
Cutiepie02: Well thank you sir.
They bantered back and forth for a little while although Sutton’s heart just wasn’t in it tonight.
Hunter16: Is this a bad time? You aren’t as chatty as you usually are.
Cutiepie02: Oh. Sorry about that. Just have some family stuff going on.
Hunter16: anything you want to talk about?
Cutiepie02: Umm...I don’t know.
Hunter16: Well, I am all ears… or eyes!
Sutton chuckled to herself, at least he had a sense of humor. Closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose, she decided she would tell this complete stranger about her family. What difference would it make, she asked herself. It wasn’t like they would probably ever meet one another. And he wasn’t sitting right next to her like Duane had been. This somehow seemed easier.
Hunter16: You still there?
Cutiepie02: Yeah, sorry. Just thinking
Hunter16: That can be dangerous sometimes…
Cutiepie02: Especially when you’re thinking of the past and things you can’t change.
Hunter16: I totally understand that. Wanna tell me what’s going on?
Cutiepie02: Well… the short version is that I have no relationship with my parents or my brother anymore.
Hunter16: Sorry to hear that. :-(
Cutiepie02: I’m not. I left home at 15.
Hunter16: Wow. That had to be hard. I can’t imagine being on my own at that age.
Cutiepie02: It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
Hunter16: One of? I don’t know many things that would be much worse…
Cutiepie02: The reason I left is because I was raped by my brother and some of his friends when I was 14 and no one believed me.
There, she’d told someone. Sutton felt the sting of warm tears running down her cheeks, it was the first time she’d cried about the rape since the night it happened. She felt both relieved and hurt all over again. Placing her phone down on the nightstand she buried her face in her soft pillow and bawled. The weight of all the pain and fear she’d felt all those years ago was hitting her all over again.
She didn’t know how long she’d laid there crying into her pillow until she heard her alarm go off the next morning. Lifting her head off the pillow she felt like someone was beating a drum inside her brain. “Fuck.” she muttered pushing her hair out of eyes before reaching over to turn off the loud alarm.
The notification light on her phone was blinking, assuming it was from Hunter16, she ignored the little green light. She didn’t want to revisit their conversation from last night. No, today was a new day and it was time to put her happy face back on for all the world to see.