Cleave

A week after Angel and I got back together, I woke up early in the morning to my room being packed full of people all screaming ‘Happy Birthday’ at me. My sisters, mother and father were all standing around my bed holding various wrapped gifts and balloons and grinning like maniacs. Well, most of them were. My mother’s facial expression was more of a grimace than a grin but at least she tried. She was pissed at me because I came home late from my job interview and it was like she could smell sex on me, even though Angel and I had enjoyed a very long, steamy (if you catch my drift) shower together once we woke up after a quick nap post-mind-blowing-sex. She tried grounding me but since there was no proof of anything untoward and my father just told her to get over it instead of backing her up, she left it alone, although she’d kept a very beady eye on me since then.

Angel and I had been texting since that night a week ago, but we were being smart about it. In my phone, he was listed under Domino’s Pizza while in his phone, I was listed under Darrell, who is one of his co-workers. If my mother ever took my phone to search through my contacts, Domino’s wouldn't make her suspicious. The only issue would be if she caught one of my messages before I could delete it, because as far as I'm aware, Domino’s doesn't offer a sexting service, and that's pretty much all we’d been doing since that night, aside from planning a little birthday celebration for me, which I was going to have to sneak out for once everyone was asleep. I honestly couldn't wait. Just a week without seeing Angel after we got back together felt like the year we spent apart all over again. I hadn't felt like this in such a long time. Happy. It had become a foreign concept over the past year but the feeling came back all of a sudden and hit me like a train.

“Micah? Hello?” Elise broke my stupor by waving her hand in front of my face. “Are you awake?”
“I'm awake,” I mumbled in reply, making my sisters and father chuckle.
“It's present time, then!” Georgia said enthusiastically, and so the present giving began with Sara handing me the large bouquet of balloons she was holding. I was given a bunch of new clothes, some CDs and DVDs that I wanted and also a new iPod Touch, since mine was extremely full and the battery didn't stay charged for very long anymore.

Once my presents were all opened, I was told to get up and dressed for breakfast, and then my family left the room so I could comply. Before I did, though, I pulled my phone out of my bedside drawer where I keep it at night and checked my messages. I had a few, mostly from other family members on Dad’s side. I also had one from my cousin Jeremy. In his text, he passed on a message from Alex, Kyle and Mason with birthday wishes and their phone numbers so I could text them if I wanted to. I was curious how they managed to track down Jeremy as they had never met him before but I was excited to be able to talk to them again and I figured I could ask them about it when I did.

I sent off generic ‘thank you’ messages as replies to my texts, with the exception of Jeremy’s where I also thanked him for the phone numbers and asked how he was going. It was really nice to hear from him again. I decided that I would make sure to text Alex, Kyle and Mason a little later, when I had a little more time.

Once I was finished all that, I slid out from under my covers and went over to my closet to find something to wear for the day. I pulled out a pair of dark blue skinny jeans and a grey t-shirt and dressed in them.

Just as my head popped out of the neck hole of my shirt, I heard my phone buzz on top of my bedside table, so I went to check it and saw a text waiting for me to read. I unlocked my phone, smiling as I read the short and sweet message.

Domino’s: Are you a birthday candle? Cause I'd like to blow you until I get my wish. Happy birthday babe.

Did I say sweet? Well, I mean, it's Angel so…
Anyway, it made me smile and I took a moment to figure out what to say back.

Micah: are u my birthday present, cos id like to unwrap u tonite. thank u <3
Domino’s: Haha I love it. You bet you can unwrap me tonight. Picking you up at 11 tonight. Love you. Strawberry.

I didn't reply to his message because ‘strawberry’ is our code word for when someone is around that we don't want to know about our texting. Just then it probably meant that Max was around. We decided on ‘strawberry’ because, as weird as it sounds, strawberries and cream was the flavour of lube we used during our first (sober) time together but it sounds innocent enough without knowing the context.

“Micah! Are you ready yet?” someone, I think Elise, yelled from the kitchen. I quickly looked in the mirror and ruffled my hair a little to try and make it sit better on my head before I left my room and went to where all of my family were sitting around the table with a variety of foods on it. I sat down in my usual spot and Dad said morning grace before we all dug into the meal, which was delicious. It's a tradition in my house to have a grand breakfast for each 18th birthday we celebrate. I'd been looking forward to it and I definitely wasn't disappointed.

Shortly after all the food was devoured and my family and I were sitting around the table in food comas, there was a loud and somewhat frenzied knock on the front door.
“Who’s that?” I asked nobody in particular.
Dad smiled. “Why don't you go and find out?”

I raised an eyebrow at his words, but got up from my seat and answered the door, where I was almost knocked flying by a body that I only just distinguished was female before I was engulfed in a hug. I could barely see anything because all of her hair was covering my face as she hugged me.

“It's so so so so great to see you, Micah!” the girl squealed in my ear.
“Alright Belle, that's enough. Let him breathe,” a deeper voice said from the front doorstep and I was finally allowed to breathe and see as Isabelle pulled away. My best friend James stepped over the threshold and pulled me in for a hug as well.

I was honestly speechless and it took me a little while to recover from the shock of seeing two people I hadn't seen for a year standing next to me in my house on my birthday. The only words I could think of were banned in my house, so I just stood there gaping for an indistinguishable amount of time.

“Helloooo? Micah, are you broken?” Isabelle’s question broke my stunned silence and I laughed. Not for any particular reason, but God I was happy to see them.
“What are you doing here?” I finally managed to get out. “I can't believe you're here! Oh, my God.”
"Your dad called me last week and asked if I was able to come see you on your birthday since it's been so long. And Belle was with me so I asked if she could come too. So here we are! Happy birthday!" James told me, smiling widely.

"Happy birthday Micah!" Isabelle squealed. "How have you been? What have you been up to? Why didn’t you contact us? You need to tell us everything! Have you seen – "

"Not here," I interrupted, fearing that my mother would be eavesdropping. "My room. Come on." I gestured for my friends to follow me and we all trooped into my room, where I closed the door. Isabelle and I sat on my bed while James took my desk chair.

"To answer your questions," I began, "Up until last week I was pretty shit..."
Isabelle frowned at my words, and I knew why.
"Crap, sorry. I was pretty crap. I wasn’t allowed to see or talk to anyone from here after I was sent away to my aunt's and she treated me pretty badly while I was there... I wasn’t allowed to do anything besides go to school, but I snuck out a lot with a couple of friends I made, but since I came back here I haven't been doing a whole lot. I did get a job at that new supermarket in the mall, though, which I start on Monday," I told them.

"And what about... have you seen him?" Isabelle whispered the last word.
I laughed quietly. "You mean Angel?"
She nodded, and so did I. "Yeah, I saw him again last week. He told me you know that we weren't just friends. We're kind of back together now," I said.
"Kind of?" James questioned.
"Yeah we... um... ya know, last week, but he's still with Max so he needs to end that before we're officially together again."
"Who's Max?"
I looked at Isabelle guiltily, knowing she wouldn’t approve. "His boyfriend..."
"Angel cheated on him with you?"
"No. Well, I mean, technically yes, but he's an ass and treats Angel like shi – uh crap so..." I trailed off as I knew my defence wouldn't hold up in the Court of Isabelle. "Anyway, he's breaking up with him soon so then we'll be together properly. And besides, we technically hadn't broken up before I was sent away, so we both cheated on each other, too. Technically... I think I just confused myself..."

James had been watching me with an amused smirk on his face while I had been trying to dig myself out of a hole, but now he started laughing. "You're an idiot, Mics."
"Shut up," I said, though smiling. It was so nice to see my friends again.

---

James, Isabelle and I spent the next few hours catching up and talking about whatever came to our minds. They told me that their relationship was going strong and that they were thinking a lot about the future (read: settling down, getting married and having children). James’ band Ecc 4:11 was also going well and getting quite popular and they had even had a few gigs with some well-known bands. I promised him that next time he had a gig I would be there front and centre like I used to be before all the drama of last year happened.

I told them in more detail about my time staying at my aunt’s house, although not really saying a whole lot about my relationship with Mason because I knew they wouldn't want to hear about my sex life. It was strange even talking about dating a boy, let alone sleeping with one, with them, especially since Isabelle was my ex-girlfriend, but they seemed to be cool with it, which was good.

While I didn't tell Isabelle and James about my arrangement with Mason, I did tell Angel about it – and the other people I slept with as well – just so that I wouldn’t be keeping secrets from him when we get back together. It was uncomfortable (especially since the conversation happened after we woke up post-sex) but necessary and I think he appreciated my honesty, even though he jokingly said that he couldn't understand why I'd want to sleep with girls after being with him. I'd rolled my eyes and told him that he's way too cocky for his own good, he'd shrugged in response and then we went to have a shower and it wasn't mentioned again after that. I wondered if it would be brought up again when we see each other again for my birthday celebration, but I guess I would just have to wait and see.

Speaking of my birthday celebration, I also told Isabelle and James about it, but swore them to secrecy. I couldn't really tell them a huge amount about what it would be since I didn't know a whole lot myself but I did invite them along. They thanked me for the invite but declined, telling me to have fun and to use protection (that was James saying that last bit; Isabelle cringed and rolled her eyes when he did).

All too soon, my friends had to leave so that Isabelle could go to a meeting about the senior prom at school. They were very far behind in preparation this year, meaning that they had to have a meeting on a Saturday. I hugged them both goodbye, promising that I would see them soon, and they left, giving me several hours to do whatever I wanted until I was picked up by Angel at 11pm.

I spent quite some time while smoking a cigarette (blowing the smoke out my open bedroom window) texting Alex, Kyle and Mason in a group message, which was amazing. It was so good to hear from them again. I was glad to hear that they were all doing well, and they even dropped the bomb on me that Alex was about two months pregnant. That blew my mind, but she and Kyle were happy and that's the main thing. Kyle had been looking for work to be able to support the baby and two weeks before my birthday was taken on as an apprentice electrician by his uncle’s friend and he seemed to be enjoying his work. I told my friends about my supermarket job as well and they were all happy for me. The most awkward part of the conversation was when Alex asked about Angel and Mason suddenly stopped texting back. I knew me still being in love with Angel was a sore spot for him back when I was living with my aunt, but I hoped that he would've been able to move on with me gone. It didn't seem to be the case yet, which made me sad but hopefully in the future it would happen and Mason would find someone who could love him properly.

I stopped texting my friends when I was called for dinner with my family, telling them that I'd talk to them soon. Dinner was roast pork with potatoes, gravy and vegetables and it was delicious. My mother is a really good cook and it was nice that she went to the effort of making me my favourite meal for my birthday. I made sure I showed her my appreciation for it, and she seemed to let go of a little bit of her anger towards me.

After dinner, my family and I all sat around a game of Monopoly and played until Georgia completely bankrupt all of us at about 9pm. I figured I could try and take a bit of a nap before going out, so I feigned tiredness and headed to bed. Instead of changing into my pyjamas, I got changed into my skinniest pair of grey jeans and a plain black v-neck t-shirt ready for Angel to pick me up, and then I climbed into bed. It wasn't the most comfortable but I would be okay for a couple of hours. I made sure to set my alarm for 10:50 so that I would be awake when he came, placed my phone on my pillow next to my head and then drifted off into an easy sleep.

I awoke abruptly when my alarm went off quietly next to my ear and quickly turned it off in case anyone heard it. I didn't think they would, but it was better to be safe than sorry. I then dragged myself out of the bed and adjusted my clothes so that they weren't all twisted around, put my phone and wallet in my pockets and grabbed a pair of shoes and socks to put on after I had escaped my house. I quietly opened my bedroom door and stuck my head out, noting that it was dark throughout the house. I listened carefully for any sounds of someone being awake, but after about a minute not hearing anything out of the ordinary, I slowly ventured out of my room, down the hall and then out the front door to freedom. Once I had very carefully closed the front door behind me and walked a few houses down from my own, I pulled my phone from my pocket to check the time. I had a few minutes to wait for Angel so I used it to put on my shoes. He arrived not too long after in Drew's nice VW Golf and I was quick to get in the passenger seat.

"Hi, baby," Angel said. I leaned over to plant a kiss on his mouth, which I held for a few seconds before pulling away. "Happy birthday."
"Thank you," I replied. "And hi. What are we doing tonight?"
"We're going to mine and Drew's house. We've got some food and drinks and Braden and Rochelle are coming. I know it's not much but..."
"It sounds great," I cut him off, making him smile.
"I'm glad," he said. It was quiet as he continued to drive along the virtually empty streets and we made it to his place in only a few minutes. (He may have been speeding a bit.)

We remained silent as we walked into the house, but as soon as Angel unlocked the front door and opened it, suddenly the night burst with the sounds of Drew, Braden and Rochelle screaming 'Happy Birthday' at me.
"Fuck, guys, keep it down, would you? The whole neighbourhood probably heard you," Angel said, though smiling.

I was pulled into a hug by Rochelle, who told me that she was glad I was back. Then, Drew handed me a drink – a screwdriver – and the night finally began.

Angel and I drank and hung out with Drew, Rochelle and Braden for a couple of hours, getting more than a little tipsy, before we decided that it was Alone-Time-O’clock, and we retreated to his bedroom.

There, we fulfilled what we spoke about in our text messages that morning, with me unwrapping him like he was my birthday present (and let’s face it, feeling him moving inside me was the best present of the day) and him blowing me until he got his wish (which apparently was for me to be completely spent and sexually satisfied by the end of the night). Afterward, we stayed wrapped around each other in his bed, talking about whatever came to mind and running our hands over each other’s still naked bodies, gently touching and teasing and revelling in the amazing feeling being together again gave us. He told me he wasn’t going to put off breaking up with Max anymore; that he was going to do it as soon as possible. He was nervous, but knew it was the right thing to do. His words made my heart sing. I couldn’t have been happier than I was lying in that bed with the only guy I’ve ever loved.

But the feeling had to cease eventually, and the time came when I had to leave so that I could get home before everyone woke up. Angel and I got ourselves re-dressed and headed out to the living room where Rochelle (who was staying sober) was dozing with her head on Braden’s shoulder. He was snoring loudly while holding a half-empty bottle of tequila precariously from his fingertips. Drew was also asleep, on an armchair with his head hanging in what must have been a painful way.

Angel gently woke Rochelle, who took a couple of minutes to fully wake up, and then we were on our way back to my house. There was a time when I would have been freaking out about sneaking home after getting drunk, but now I found that I didn’t really care whether I was busted or not.

It didn’t take long until we arrived back at my house, and I spent a few minutes making out with Angel before I finally pulled away and got out of the car, thanking Rochelle for the ride home and promising to see them soon. I told them to go right away in case I was caught, which was probably a good thing, because as soon as I quietly opened the front door, the lights in the hall flashed on and my mother was standing a few metres away from the door wearing a bathrobe and an expression that would probably have sent me to the grave if looks could kill.

“Hi Mom,” I said, and attempted to move past her to get to my room.
She wasn’t having any of it and stepped in front of me. I tried to side-step, but she blocked me again.

“Micah,” she said in a threatening tone, and I stopped trying to get past her. I just looked at her with a bored expression until she continued. “Where were you?”
“You probably don’t want to know,” I replied.
“Oh, yes I do. Where the hell were you?” she snarled. “You’ve been drinking. You’ve been smoking. I saw you get dropped off by someone and I swear if it was that boy I banned you from seeing…”
She didn’t finish her sentence, letting her threat hang in the air.
“Yeah… you probably really don’t want to know then.”
“Micah! Tell me right now!” she yelled. It was loud enough to wake the entire family.
“Fine. I was with Angel. Because I love him and I wanted to see him for my birthday,” I told her as calmly as I could.
“I told you…” she started.

“Yeah, you told me not to see him. Well guess what, I don’t fucking care what you want. I’m an adult now and I can do whatever the fuck I want for the first time in my goddamn life and you can’t stop me,” I was the one shouting now, and it roused my father and sisters out of bed to join the party. “And by the way, the sex was fantastic. He always makes me feel so good; way better than all the other people I fucked while I was away at Aunt Tina’s getting –”

“SHUT UP!” my mother roared, making everyone in the house jump. “You are a disgrace. An absolute disgrace. I don’t know what I did to deserve this. I tried to raise you right. I tried to fix you when I sent you away and you came back even more broken than before. I don’t want this. I don’t need this. I won’t have a faggot son living in my house anymore. In fact, I don’t want a son anymore. Not one like you. You’re dead to me, Micah. Dead. I don’t want to see you any longer.”

“Then you’re the one who’s going to have to leave, Davina,” my father finally spoke up. “I won’t have you speaking to my son like that in this house. He is not broken. He is a human being who can’t help who he has feelings for. Being gay is not something he can control and it’s not something that I will ever hold against someone of my own flesh and blood, or anyone, for that matter. So if you have a problem with Micah, you can leave tonight. We can discuss this when you’re willing to see reason.”

My father looked at me with a small, sad smile on his face. I mouthed ‘thank you’. I knew how hard this was for him, because he loves my mother more than almost anything.

“Micah, girls, please go to bed,” he said to us quietly, and we all shuffled off to our respective bedrooms without another word.

For over half an hour, I lay awake in my bed with tears rolling down my cheeks, to the sound of my mother and father speaking quietly to each other while Mom packed a bag and left. The house felt slightly emptier when the front door shut, but I wiped my tears and tried to put it out of my mind, at least for the night. I rolled over and slowly fell into an uneasy, sad sleep.