Fix Me. (No Longer Updating, Very Bad Fic)

"No. Way. In. Hell." Alan glared at his mother.

"It'll be so much fun, Alan!" She exclaimed, shaking so much from her excitement, you'd think she would have pissed her pants.

"No it won't!" Alan argued, his face turning a shade of red that was strangely close to the colour of his hair.

"I loved camp when I was your age! I know you'll have fun." She said, absolutely ecstatic her son was going to the same camp that she went to as a kid, "It might even help you with the funk you've been in." She added.

Who the fuck says 'funk' anymore? Alan thought bitterly. Alan hated camping. Absolutely hated. He couldn't stand the thought of being stuck in a cabin with a bunch of what he described as "unintelligent-fuckwads-who-don't-know-how-utterly-fucked-up-the-world-is". He hated his mother even more at the moment, not able to believe that she'd signed him up for summer camp.

"First of all; no one says 'funk' anymore. Second of all; going to a shitty camp won't fix my problems. If anything, it will make them worse." Alan snapped angrily, crossing his arms and slouching even further into the plush tan couch seated in the middle of the living room across from their television set.

"You'll make friends and forget about whats-his-name and all of the other stuff thats happened." His mother sympathized, setting her hand on his shoulder and squeezing slightly in attempt to calm her son.

"It's not that easy, mom." He sighed, his anger turning into sorrow as tears welled in his eyes.

Alan's mother watched with a frown as her son wiped furiously at his eyes before pushing himself from the couch and rushing to his room. She let out a sad sigh and went into the kitchen to make dinner, hoping Alan would at least try to eat something.

-x-

"Alan, it'll be fun. I promise." Alan's mother sighed, as she turned the steering wheel, shifting the wheels so the car turned down yet another dirt road (as she'd been doing for the past thirty minutes.)

"Sure!" Alan exclaimed sarcastically, "I'm sure you're only dumping me here so you don't have to deal with my shit while Glen's visiting." He snapped spitefully, his voice instantly changing to something that resembled a growl.

"Honey..." She trailed off, "You know it's not like that. I just want you to make some friends." She added, her face dropping at the thought of her son actually believing she'd abandon him.

"I know." He mumbled, slouching further into his seat, "I'm just pissed off."

Alan stayed silent for the rest of the drive to the camp -which was much too far from the city for him-, staring out the window as he struggled to keep his eyes opened. This happened quite a lot with Alan.

Alan didn't like sleeping anymore, sleep used to rid him of any worries. Sleep used to drown out everything, it used to be peaceful. His dreams used to be filled with lovely images and places, sleep used to take him away from the horrors of the world. Now, sleep was terrifying. Alan's dreams are no longer a safe haven, they're filled with horrifying scenarios and terrible images. His sleep was no longer peaceful.

"Honey, get some sleep." His mother said, concerned for her son's health.

"'M good." Alan muttered, knowing if he just so much as closed his eyes he'd see images of him. Plus, Alan did not want a repeat of what happened last time he fell asleep.

But, regardless of what Alan wanted, his body was forcing him to do the opposite. Alan watched the trees blur together as his eyelids became heavier, knowing there was nothing he could do, he let himself drift off into a restless sleep.

Alan ran through the thick shrub-like trees, frantically swatting branches attempting to keep them from colliding with his face. Alan continued to run, trying desperately to get away from whatever was chasing him, he didn't know what it was and he didn't really want to know. Terror was overtaking his body, making it increasingly more difficult to breathe. Alan's lungs burned viciously as he broke into a sprint, his feet stomping on sticks causing a snap-like sound to echo through the seemingly never-ending forest. The trees seemed to get closer together, their leaves and branches seemed to get thicker. The ground got softer as he sprinted, mud spattering against his jeans.

Alan's feet suddenly stopped, not giving any warning to his upper half, causing his body to slam into the mud beneath him. The mud swallowed him into darkness, suffocating him. Alan screamed, but nothing came out. Mud flowed into Alan's mouth and down his esophagus, filling his lungs. He tried to breathe through his nose, only succeeding in taking more mud into his body. It surrounded him, engulfing his body. He couldn't move, no matter how hard he tried.

His lungs burned intensely as the pressure increased around his body, excruciating pain overcame him and he tried to scream, but he couldn't. Obscene snaps and cracks occurred as his bones scummed to the pressure, not that he could hear them. His own bones tore through his flesh and blood tried desperately to fill Alan's already full lungs.

"Alan! Wake up!" Alan's mother exclaimed worriedly, shaking him awake. She had pulled into the camps parking lot and saw her son moving a bit too much, causing her to freak out.

Alan shot up in his seat, covered in his own sweat. He choked on nothing and reached up to clutch his throat, trying desperately to breathe, but as if they were still filled with mud, he couldn't. He struggled to tear off his seat belt before opening the door of the car and stumbling out, falling to his knees. He gagged, his body trying to rid his body of the mud that wasn't really there. He only succeed in throwing up the few crackers his mom forced him to eat and most of the bile in his stomach.

He continued to retch, one hand clutching his stomach and the other digging into the gravel underneath him. Alan's mom quickly rushed out of her car to help her son. She knelt next to Alan and rubbed his back in attempt to sooth him.

"I'll get you some water." She rushed, quickly opening the back of her car to find a bottle of water in a backpack she insisted in packing snacks in for the ride.

She quickly went back to her son and knelt next to him again, helping him sit on his knees when he stopped retching and handing him the water bottle. Alan sipped at the water for a few minutes, calming himself down and attempting to breathe regularly.

"Are you okay?" She asked softly, squeezing his shoulder similarly to how she did a few days ago.

"I'm fine." He muttered, getting up and going to the already open car door to find the duffel bag and backpack he'd packed.

Alan's mother sighed and led Alan away from the makeshift parking lot and to a building. The building was one storey, resembling a large cabin. There was an overhang above a long hardwood platform littered with cushioned wicker benches and chairs, to serve as a 'comfortable' patio. On the width of the longer than necessary patio, there was a small set of stairs, only going up a few steps. Above the steps, a wooden sign hung with painted words scrawled across to say "mess hall". Could they be anymore cliche? Alan thought, rolling his eyes.

Alan's mother burst through the doors as Alan pulled his hood over his head. The counselors were spread out slightly, a large, plastic table in the center with three counselors signing kids in and directing them to picnic tables that had counselors sitting at them. Alan was dragged to the table plastic table by his mother.

A tanned man who had to be in his mid-twenties started to talk to Alan's mother. "I'm Phil." He smiled brightly, "I just need his name and we'll sign him in and figure out where he's going."

"Perfect. It's Alan Ashby." His mother said, beaming.

"Okay," Phil said, skimming over the clipboard in front of him, "There you are!" He said, a bit too happily for Alan's liking.

"You are with... Austin in the red cabin." He grinned, "He's the heavily tattooed gentleman over there, he's not half as scary as he looks." He added, sending a wink in Alan's direction.

"You just need to sign here, say your goodbyes and Austin will show Alan the cabin to get settled." Phil said smoothly, flipping a page over the top of the clipboard and turning it around to show Alan's mother where to sign.

Once Alan's mother had signed the sheet, she dragged Alan over to where Austin had been sitting, tapping his pen against the clipboard in his hand.

"Hi, there." He smiled brightly, "I'm Austin!" He exclaimed.

"I'm Helena Ashby." She smiled, "And this is Alan."

"Hello." He smiled, looking at the skinny teenager standing next to Helena.

He was standing there, staring at the floor. His ginger hair -which was wet- was attempting to hide his eyes, but Austin saw through it. His pale face with a sickly yellow hue was coated with sweat, the purple and red bags underneath contrasting rather violently with the yellow. Alan was obviously not sleeping properly, Austin concluded. Alan was wearing black skinny jeans that clung to his scarily thin frame, the knees covered in the grey dust from the gravel in the parking lot. He was also wearing an obviously too big Slipknot pullover hoodie threatening to reach his stained knees. Austin tore his attention from the boy to look at his mother.

"Well, due to the number of campers. We had filled the other cabins and realized we only had two campers left, Alan and a boy named Eugene." Austin started, "So, I am their counselor cabin-mate-person. But, Eugene ended up getting really sick and can't come, so it'll just be me and Alan. If you're not comfortable with that than we can arrange for a few other campers to switch to our cabin." He smiled brightly.

"No, that's fine!" Helena chuckled, "Alan would probably prefer less people rather than more."

"Okie-dokie." Austin smiled, scribbling something onto his clipboard.

"Okay, honey. I love you." Alan's mother said, turning to her son with tears in her eyes, "Remember to call, and to eat properly and for god sakes don't forget to take your pills." She added, scolding him slightly.

"Whatever." Alan muttered. Helena squeezed Alan's shoulder, knowing he was too pissed off to accept a hug.

"Okay, well. Goodbye." She said, giving Alan one last squeeze before leaving.

"I'll show you our cabin!" Austin exclaimed, standing from where he had been sitting.

Alan didn't bother to look up at the man, he didn't care for analyzing everything at the moment.

"Okay!" Austin said, a tinge of awkwardness lacing his voice, "Just follow me!" He added, starting to walk. Alan sighed and followed Austin, still not looking up.

The pair walked through the mess hall and out the same door Alan and his mother had walked through on their way in. Instead of going to his right, to be led to the parking lot, Austin turned left and walked down the patio. They came to a similar set of stairs to the other side, and Austin turned left yet again to walk down a trail leading to a large grassy area. Each side of the clearing had large soccer nets, with metal frames and worn nets, covered in dirt. The clearing also had two cabins, one on each side of the length of the field.

The cabins were medium-sized, made from logs with a rather high foundation. Each cabin had a small set of stairs leading to doors with signs above. The cabin on the left was slightly larger and labeled "Lounge", with a more curly, cursive esque writing than the scrawl from earlier. The cabin on the right was labeled "Arts and Crafts", causing Alan to roll his eyes.

There is no way in hell Alan was going to do arts and crafts.

Across the clearing, there was an abundance of trees, much like in Alan's dream. Along the tree line, there were five signs, each next to a start of a trail. Four of the signs were coloured brightly, each coloured a different colour and label. One was labeled "Blue Cabin" and coloured blue, another labeled "Green Cabin" and coloured green, the same rules applying for the Yellow and Red sign. The fifth trail was labeled "Lake", which Alan assumed automatically that trail led to a lake.

"So, what made you decide to come to camp?" Austin asked, turning his head behind him to look at Alan.

"I didn't." Alan grumbled in response, following Austin as he walked to the red cabin trail.

"Oh, your mom signed you up?" Austin asked, chuckling slightly.

Alan didn't respond, deciding not to waste his breath.

"My mom did that a while back when I was a kid, I hated it a first." Austin said, talking like he was forty. Although, Alan was sure he couldn't be any older than twenty, "I ended up liking it though, that's why I'm here, actually." Austin laughed.

Austin sighed as they started walking down the trail, he had no idea why Alan was so bitter about this. He pretty much had a cabin to himself, with one of the coolest staff there! Not really, Austin's an absolute nerd.

"So, how old are you?" Austin asked, trying desperately to fill the silence.

"Sixteen." Came the curt response.

"Cool, I'm twenty." Austin replied, smiling back at Alan.

"You'll love our cabin, it's super cozy and it has a shower, the only cabin with one actually." Austin grinned, the image of the cabin in his mind, "It can get pretty hot in there though." He added, his grin fading a bit.

Alan inwardly huffed. He hated heat, and he hated being around people, let alone, loud cheery people.

"Annnd, we're here!" Austin exclaimed, looking up at the cabin he insisted in being in every year.

Alan looked up at the rather small cabin. It was a log cabin, of course. The red paint on the door was chipping off, revealing the bright green paint underneath. Why it was green? Both Alan and Austin didn't know. The cabin was surrounded by trees, honestly it was freaking Alan out.

Austin practically skipped inside, and dragged Alan with him.

Inside, there was a door on the back wall which Alan assumed led to the shower. On either side of wall, there were bunk beds, both with Christmas lights wrapped around the wooden frame.

"I've been in here every year, so I've kind of personalized it." Austin smiled, as he sat down on the bottom buck to the left of the room. Alan looked around the room to see multiple band posters tacked up on the walls along with a few movie posters. At least he had a good taste in music, right?

Alan sat on the bottom bunk of the right bunk beds and sat his bags next to him.

"I'm kind of using the top bunk as a place to keep my stuff, so feel free to do the same on your side." Austin said, feeling an awkward silence coming on.

Austin watched Alan curiously from his bed, as Alan tossed his bags to the top bunk and started to
pull his clothes from the bags. Austin wanted Alan to like him, he usually didn't give a fuck what people thought of him, but there was something about Alan that drew Austin towards him.

"Do you draw?" Austin asked, as Alan pulled a black sketch book from his backpack.

"Yeah." Alan grumbled, setting the book down and going for his pencils.

"Can I see them sometime?" Austin asked, watching Alan curiously.

"No." Alan spoke firmly.

"I need to go and help other campers sign in, I'll be back in a bit though, okay?" Austin sighed, watching Alan as he walked over to the door.

Alan couldn't find the energy to respond to Austin as he continued to unpack his belongings, earning a disappointed sigh from Austin.

Austin liked Alan, he wanted Alan to like him. Usually he didn't care much for people liking him, but Alan was different. He knows Alan is far too young for him, he knows for a fact Alan doesn't like him-and probably won't- but, what's the shame in trying to be his friend, right?

Austin doesn't see Alan in that kind of light, no, how could he? I mean, Alan is just a kid, who's a camper. At camp. That he went to as a kid and Alan is a kid. Austin sighed yet again, pushing the thoughts from his head as he walked back to the mess hall.

Alan on the other hand craved for people to like him, although it doesn't seem like it. He craved attention, even though all he does is push people away, they're better off without him, right? Alan wanted attention from people, he wanted people to like him, but, he knew better than that. Being vulnerable, and letting people in only sets him up for disappointment and heartbreak.

Everyone he's trusted has hurt him, even his mother. She did send him to a camp where everyone will most likely bully him. Alan knew better than to trust Austin, Alan knew he'd only get hurt in the long run.

Austin let out a huff as he entered the mess hall. I'm going to make this kid like me. He thought, determined.