Dolce Vita

Sloane peeked through the curtains covering the window on the door to find Roman still sitting on the front porch which he had been doing since nine that morning and it was nearly noon now. She closed the curtains and leaned against the door, letting out a loud breath of air.

Kim walked into the kitchen, spied Sloane and asked, "Is he still out there?"

Sloane nodded, "He won't leave."

"You're gonna have to talk to him at some point hun." Kim told her, shooting her a sympathetic smile as Sloane pouted. She filled up a water bottle with water, grabbed her gym bag and told Sloane, "I'm going to the gym. Please invite the poor guy in."

"Don't leave me!" Sloane hissed as Kim shoved her feet into a pair of shoes and fixed her pony tail. When she went to open the door Sloane put her hand on it to keep it shut and spoke quietly, "Kimberly don't leave me alone."

"You'll be fine. Besides you're not alone, Roman is here." Kim stated with a grin before adding, "If you'd ever let him inside."

"I so hate you right now." Sloane muttered as Kim yanked the door open and walked outside. Roman stood up and turned around at the noise as Kim bounded down the steps and got into her car. Sloane looked over at Roman, who was scratching the back of his neck and glancing down at her. She tried to smile as she said, "You should come in, you're starting to scare the neighbors."

Roman smiled at that and he followed her in, slipping out of his shoes and watching as Sloane paced the living room floor in front of the couch. He sat down on the couch and stayed silent as Sloane continued to pace in front of him. Finally he looked up at her and asked, "Was it something I did or said?"

"What?"

"Whatever the reason for you not talking to me for this long. Did I do something?" Her head snapped toward him as he said this and she immediately stopped pacing. She took the seat beside him, ran her fingers through her hair and let out a sigh.

"It's not you I promise." She assured him.

He nodded slowly and asked, "So…what is it?"

"It was just… I needed some time to figure some things out." Sloane told him, her voice quiet. Roman glanced at her, watched her twisting a ring around her middle finger.

"And?"

"And I still have no idea what to do." Sloane muttered putting her head in her hands. Roman watched her bounce her knees up and down before she sat up straight and pushed her hair out of her face. She then said, "I'm pregnant."

"You're... what?"

"Yeah." Sloane muttered, not meeting his eyes.

Roman couldn't stop himself from asking, "Are you sure?"

"I got a blood test last week." Sloane told him, running her index finger over a tear in her sweat pants.

"You should have told me. I would have went with you." Roman told her, making Sloane smile gently.

She shook her head and told him, "Kim went with me. I just wanted to be sure before I told you, and then when I was sure I just didn't know how to tell you."

"So… you're... I mean we're…"

Sloane let out a breath of air and told him, "I'm not expecting anything from you I just couldn't not tell you."

"I'm not going anywhere." When he said this she let out a loud breath of air and he curiously asked her, "Were you really expecting me to?"

"I don't know… it's just that who would want to get stuck raising a kid with someone they barely know?" Sloane asked him, her cheeks flushed.

"Is this how I wanted our relationship to go? No but this is the situation we're in now and I might not know anything about it but I'm up for figuring it out." Roman told her, reaching out to slip his hand into hers. She gave his hand a gentle squeeze and Roman was comforted by that.

She looked at their hands and told him, "I don't want you to feel like you have to do this. You don't, I can figure this out myself don't feel obligated to stick around."

"Sloane I'm not going anywhere." He assured her, and Sloane was surprised at how glad she was to hear him say that.

"I just don't know what to do." She mumbled, pulling her hand from his to put her head in both her hands.

Roman watched her for a moment, he didn't know what to do. Was he supposed to keep his distance, or was he supposed to touch her? Was he supposed to say anything? Finally he decided to tell her, "Whatever you want to do I'm behind you. If you decide you don't want to do this then that's fine, I'll go and hold your hand through everything and I'll take you home and make you chicken noodle and nap with you."

"And if I decide I want to keep it?" She asked him quietly, glancing at him for a second before she pulled her eyes away from him and back to her socks.

"Then we'll keep it and we'll do it together." Roman told her, making her turn to him again. She had a look of relief in her eyes that made him smile and wrap his arm around her shoulder to pull her into his side. He looked down at her, his eyes meeting hers and he told her, "We'll be okay."

It wasn't until later that night, after a movie night with Kim that Sloane and Roman found themselves laying in bed. They were both at a loss for words after a long day and neither one wanted to interrupt the others thought process. Sloane was staring at her toes at the end of the bed, which she noted were much tinier than Roman's and Roman was looking at their hands; intertwined and sitting on his stomach.

With his free hand he pulled out his phone and Googled pregnancy. Sloane's eyes caught on his screen and she rolled onto her side, resting her head on his shoulder so she could see as well. Roman spoke out loud, "So he's about the size of a kidney bean."

"He?" Sloane asked with a smile.

Roman's cheeks flushed and he shrugged, "Or she. I don't care."

"I do." Sloane said, and when Roman raised his eyebrow she explained, "I want a boy. I know you're not supposed to start planning this early or anything but if I could pick the gender I'd pick a boy."

"Why? If you don't mind me asking?"

Shrugging Sloane told him, "I don't know. Boys are easier I guess. My nieces might be cute but they're awful little gremlins."

He let out a laugh at this before he told her, "I don't know a girl might be nice."

Sloane smiled, "I'd prefer a boy but as long as it's healthy I guess I won't care either way."

"You'll still be pissed if it's a girl." Roman told her with a grin.

"Probably." She stated.

After a few seconds of silence Roman asked her, "So we have a game tomorrow night and I was wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner with a few of the guys after?"

"Do you want me to?" Roman could tell the thought made her nervous, probably more so now than anything.

"I do but don't feel like you have to."

"I mean… I guess I should probably meet a few of your teammates." Sloane told him with a small smile. Roman leaned down to kiss her quickly before she told him, "But if Colin is there I may stab him with a fork."

"I'll be sure to uninvite him if he was invited."

- - -

They had no practice today and a game that night and at nine in the morning Roman found himself pulling into the Weber's driveway. Sloane had all but kicked him out that morning in an attempt to actually get some work done and Roman had spent fifteen minutes trying to decide how to tell his parents that they were going to be grandparents, he wasn't even sure his parents knew he had a girlfriend.

He figured the next best thing would be to tell Shea and Riley. They could be a practice run of sorts. He got out of the car and walked up to the front door, ringing the bell. He heard Dug bark before the door opened and Riley was standing in front of him in a fluffy robe with bed head. She smiled gently, "Breakfast?"

Roman chuckled, "If it's on sure."

"It always is." She told him, stepping out of the way to let him inside without letting the dog out. Roman slid his shoes off and followed her into the kitchen where Shea was standing at the stove cooking bacon and breakfast sausage.

"What is with this whole breakfast at Shea's thing lately with you guys?" Shea joked, and when Roman's brows crunched together he explained, "Colin was here yesterday and Mike and Peks the day before."

"You make a mean breakfast I guess." Roman told him with a shrug of his shoulders.

As Riley filled three glasses with juice she glanced at Roman curiously. She set the glasses on the table before she took a seat next to him and he raised his eyebrow at her. She shrugged and pretended not to know what he was raising his eyebrow at ad Shea put their breakfasts on plates and brought them to the table before going back for the plate of toast.

Once they were seated and eating Riley kept glancing at Roman, who said nothing to neither her nor Shea. She glanced at Shea who seemed too busy with eating to notice how odd his teammate was acting. She continued to eat her breakfast in silence even though she wanted to find out what was going on.

Roman had offered to do the dishes, something Riley had said he didn't have to do but Shea welcomed. After that he sat at the table again and Riley finally asked, "Alright what's up?"

Shea raised his eyebrow when Roman told her, "I have a situation."

"Okay, explain."

"Well…uh… so…" When he couldn't figure out how to get the words out he pushed his hands through his hair and his cheeks puffed out as they filled with air. Riley and Shea exchanged a look and finally Roman let out a breath of air before he just came out and said it, "Sloane's pregnant."

Shea dropped the dog bone he was getting ready to give Dug and Riley's eyebrows raised in surprise. Shea muttered, "Holy fuck."

If this was anything like his parents might react Roman wondered how long he could go without telling them about Sloane and the baby. Riley reached over and slapped Shea in the stomach before she turned to Roman and asked, "For sure?"

He nodded, "Dr confirmed it. 8 weeks."

"So… pretty much the first time you guys…" Shea let off.

Riley rolled her eyes at him, "The details are not important Shea."

"No you're right sorry. So…what are you gonna do?" Again Riley reached over and hit him.

"Smooth doofus. Real smooth."

Roman couldn't help but chuckle at this, and his chuckle turned into full blown laughter, laughter so hard he was nearly crying. He needed that now of all the times he needed a good laugh. Shea and Riley again shared a look before Shea stated, "Sanitariums would be in the yellow pages yeah?"

"You're so not helping anyone right now." Riley muttered to him before she turned to Roman and asked, "Does she have any idea of what she wants to do? Has she talked to someone about her options? Have you two talked about your options?"

"She wants to keep it and I told her I'd support her no matter what. She tried to give me a clean break but how is that fair?" Roman stated, glancing over at Shea, expecting to see a look of diappointment on his captains face. Shea, being older and more mature on top of being his captain and defense partner, had filled the role of older brother slash confidant slash friend when Roman had first gotten to Nashville. So much so that he didn't like the idea of letting him down on or off the ice.

Shea simply smiled gently at him and told him, "I'm glad you're sticking around for her."

"I couldn't just take off you know? It's not right and besides that's my kid I want to be around."

Riley couldn't help but pat his shoulder as she walked past him and tell him, "I'm glad."

- - -

Sloane was sitting in front of her computer with a to go cup of tea courtesy of Kim. She had written and rewritten this piece four times now and even proof reading gave her anxiety just at the thought of submitting it. She wasn't sure if Roman payed much attention to her column of sorts, he'd mentioned it a few times and it was enough to know he'd read a few things here and there. That fact was the only thing that was keeping her from sending it in.

The metaphorical curve ball in life that isn't so metaphorical.

Life is great, your job is perfect, you have an amazing boyfriend and you've scheduled a night of wine and take out with your best friends to catch up and then suddenly way out of left field life hits you with a curve ball and knocks you off your feet.

This can go one of two ways.

You can sit there and watch your life derail from the tracks and crash and burn or you can get up, figure your shit out for lack of a better word, and get back on track.

Way easier said than done though, right?

So what so you do when you want to figure it out but you can't? Maybe you don't know where to start or you just can't make yourself do it. Either way you have to start at some point so grab a snack and take some notes because this one's gonna be a long one.

The idea of your life spinning wildly out of control (I'll try to refrain from any more baseball references from now on) can be terrifying for anyone. Starting over, big changes or even small changes are something most people aren't accustomed to. 99% of people are creatures of habit, we like order and ritual and familiarity. Hence the fear aspect of change.

It's easier to stay in a little bubble of familiarity, the same job, same friends, same activities and same structure nearly every day than it is to branch out and do something different. So when you're having to reevaluate your entire life and everything you're used to not by choice but because of that not so made up idea of being thrown off track by something you didn't see coming it's a little more daunting than if you were making those changes on your own time for your own reasons.

So back to our two options.

Wallowing in self pity and letting your life crash and burn before your own eyes is certainly the easier option. Sure you should get the chance to wallow and feel bad about your life or whatever you want to feel bad about but it's all about not getting sucked into that proverbial hole you can't get back out of.

When you're ready to get back up and figure things out you have to decide where to start. That's not something anyone, myself included, can help you figure out. My only advice is to take some time to get to know yourself and your situation and to not be afraid of including the people in your life. The worst thing you can do is shut yourself out from the rest of the world. The people in your life who matter aren't going to run away at the slightest quake in your life, and if they do you're better off without them anyway.