Seven Year Ache

Shea was running late. No, correction, he was running way late. Two hours to be exact. Showing up two hours late for a couple’s night in while trying to fix your relationship was definitely not the way to do it. He was practically sprinting from the arena to the parking lot to get to his car, hoping that Riley wasn’t too angry with him. What had started as a simple interview session tied into some kind of PR thing that was supposed to be no more than a few hours tops turned into all afternoon and well into the evening. He had told Riley that he would be home by five the latest and it was now nearly eight. He had half the mind to text her just to gauge how furious she would be at him but he decided to just make it home as quickly as he could.

He was halfway to his car when he realized he forgot his phone in the cubby in his locker room stall, he stopped walking, paused for a moment before he shook his head and decided he could get it tomorrow at practice. Continuing to his vehicle and getting in, wasting no time to put his seatbelt on and back out of the parking spot and pull right out of the parking lot and onto the street. He really couldn’t afford to be any later than he was.

The drive home was spent drafting up various different apologies and speeches for why he was late depending on the kind of reaction he got when he walked in the door. There was the on the knees grovelling kind of apology if she was vocally angry, if she was quiet and wouldn’t talk to him he would stick to a simple explanation and an apology and sleep in the guest room, and if she was visibly upset he would combine the other two options together.

Shea knew Riley well enough that those were her three levels of anger. It usually started with being upset, and then moved to being pissed off and then the final level was silence. So he knew that if he came home and she was quiet and wouldn’t talk to him that she had been stewing in anger long enough to pass through the other two stages which meant he probably had no chance of fixing it even though he would try.

As he pulled the car into the driveway and cut the engine he glanced at the house, the only light on was the one in the bedroom, which made him sigh as he got out of the car. He started up the driveway, waving back at the neighbour who waved from his own driveway, before he unlocked the front door and stepped inside. Dug immediately trotted up to him for a pet, and when Shea did that and slipped out of his shoes he went upstairs, so Shea followed him slowly. Not before noticing the probably cold dinner set up on the kitchen table, both plates untouched. He sighed.

Pushing the bedroom door open slowly Shea stepped inside and his brows crunched in confusion as he watched Riley pack a suitcase. He didn’t know what to say, surely being late once wasn’t this big of a deal. He continued to watch her, aware by the sound of her sniffles that she was crying, and finally when she turned to grab something from the dresser she noticed him and jumped.

Shea finally found his words then, “I know I was late and I should have called.”

“It’s okay.” She told him, barley looking at him before she went back to the dresser and grabbed a handful of bras from the top drawer, tossing them without looking at the suitcase. She pulled open the drawer below it and grabbed a handful of shirts as well, also tossing them into the suitcase without really looking at it.

“Ry…” This didn’t pull her attention away from the dresser as she continued to rifle through the drawers looking for whatever she needed to pack next. Finally Shea stepped forward and grabbed her wrists in his hands, pulling her attention to him he said, “Don’t leave because I fucked up once, please.”

She looked up at him with soft, tear filled eyes and told him, “I’m not… it’s not because of you.”

Gently she pulled her wrists from his grasp and opened another drawer, grabbing a few pairs of folded up jeans. She walked back to the suitcase and Shea watched her finally go through and fold things inside it properly. He cleared his throat and asked, “Then what is it?”

“It’s my dad.” She told him softly, her eyes filling with tears again. She reached up and wiped them away before she gripped the edge of the suitcase and took in a deep breath. Eventually she told him, keeping her back to him, her voice shaky, “He’s in the hospital, apparently he’s been there for a while and refused to call me, and his doctor called earlier.”

“Is he okay?” Shea asked, taking a few steps toward her so that he was standing beside her, only he was facing her while she faced the bed. She shook her head and reached up, wiping at her cheeks again, unable to say anything to him. Shea reached out and with one arm around her shoulder pulled her into his chest, and she leaned against him trying not to cry, she had been crying since she got off the phone with Dave’s doctor. Shea rested his head against hers and ran his hand over her curly hair as they stood in silence for a few minutes, neither one knowing what to say.

Eventually she pulled away from him and looked up at him, telling him softly, “I have to go home.”

He nodded, “Absolutely. I’ll go book you a flight.”

Riley this time nodded and as he went to walk away she reached out and grabbed his hand to stop him long enough to tell him, “Thank you.”

He sent her a soft smile before he walked out of the bedroom and downstairs and into the little office that was tucked in behind the kitchen. He sat at the desk for a moment, head in his hands and let out a deep breath of air, unsure of how to feel. Dave had always been like a second father to him, he had always had a big interest in his career even in juniors; he supported pretty much everything Shea did in hockey and life. But Shea also knew how much he meant to Riley, as she had told him once their closeness was a result of being an only child and Dave having to be mom and dad.

He turned the computer on and searched through the airline website, booking the earliest flight that he could find for Riley, before he printed off the flight information and made his way back upstairs. Riley had finished packing and she was now sitting on the edge of the bed staring at the hardwood floors, she looked up and over when he walked in and Shea held up the flight papers, handing them to her as he said, “Earliest I could get was tomorrow morning, you’d have to be at the airport by six, you’d get in Kelowna around two-thirty.”

“Thank you.” She stated, placing the folded papers in her lap before she went back to staring at the floor. She didn’t know what to say, she hadn’t really been able to say anything since that phone call. What could she say anyway? It wasn’t like she was being called about something silly, or a fall or a cold. She was being called to be informed that after months of being sick her father was finally dying, and had refused to let anyone call and tell his daughter beforehand, in fact the doctor had told her that Dave didn’t even know he was calling her. Leave it to Dave to still be deciding what was best for Riley despite her being nearly thirty years old.

She couldn’t remember a time when she had been this angry with him, even though she shouldn’t be angry with him and she felt guilty for it. They had always had a very unique relationship; Dave had taught her how to ride a bike, how to change a tire and use almost every tool he had with near perfection. But he had also learned to braid hair for her, he read her princess books as a child, and when she had come home from seeing Shea off when he went to Nashville Dave had laid in bed with her and comforted her while she cried for hours. All the things that mothers were supposed to do.

It was Dave who did her hair for her prom, he had even forced her to go dress shopping for it because he refused to let her skip it. Anything and everything her friends would do with their mothers Riley had done with Dave. It wasn’t conventional, but it was her life and they adapted to being a one parent household. Riley liked to think she grew up polite and respectful because of the way her father had raised her, and that had her mother been around it probably would have been different.

Shea sat down beside her, put his arm around her waist just to let her know he was there, and he was surprised when Riley looked at him and said, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” He asked her in confusion.

“This. Leaving when we’re trying to fix things.” Riley told him, looking down at her hands.

Shea shook his head and told her, “Don’t apologize for that, you have to go and I get that. Riley believe me I get that, I would never in a million years expect or ask you to stay or even let you stay if you wanted to. You need to go back to Kelowna and be with your dad. It’s as simple as that.”

“Yeah but-”

He shook his head again, tucked his index finger under her chin and made her look at him as he told her, “I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Promise?” She asked quietly.

“I promise.” Shea told her softly, and he was surprised when she leaned up and kissed him. She kissed him in a way she hadn’t kissed him in months, it made him wrap his arms around her tightly, pulling her into him. She moved so that she was on his lap, legs on either side of his as she kissed him with both her hands flat on the sides of his face.

Shea pulled back for a moment, looking at her and the small smile on her face, before he got up, her still in his lap and laid her on her back on the bed. Riley scooted up to the pillows as he climbed onto the bed and hovered over her, looking down at her as he kept himself from completely crushing her with his weight. He tucked her hair behind her ears and kissed her again, and Riley wrapped one arm around his side with her hand pressed against the middle of his back while the other hand was laying against his shoulder blade. Shea pulled apart from her lips, moving his own down her jaw and neck, where he pushed the strap of her tank top off of her shoulder and kissed her collarbone. He pressed a kiss to the hollow of her throat before he pressed his lips against hers again as she hooked one of her legs around one of his own and pulled him down as close to her as possible.

They hadn’t been together in this way in months, neither of them could remember when the last time they had been was but it had to have been well over six months. Yet things weren’t fast and desperate between them like they might have been before, no things were slow and sweet between them this time.

- - -

Hours later Shea found himself driving through Nashville, it was still dark out and street lights lit the way to the airport. While he drove Riley sat in the passenger seat fidgeting with her hands, she had been like that since the alarm went off at three-thirty that morning telling them both they needed to get up. Shea brought her bag to the car while she got dressed and ready to go, and then by four-thirty they were in the car on the way to the airport.

Shea pulled into the parking lot and paid the meter for an hour before he grabbed Riley’s suitcase from the back and walked over to her side of the vehicle. She was still sitting inside, not moving, her eyes on the dash. He spoke softly, “Ry we gotta go.”

“I know.” She said quietly, still not moving.

So he didn’t rush her, he stood leaning against the side of the car with the door open watching her sitting in the front seat with her eyes closed. In and out. Breathe. She tried to tell herself it would be okay, but she knew it wouldn’t, and that didn’t help her case in trying to get up and out of the car. Finally she took one last deep breath, swung her feet out of the car and got out, closing the door softly she followed Shea inside the airport and checked herself in for her flight.

They stood by security, waiting until the last possible minute to go through. Riley was leaning into his side, and he had one arm around her shoulders and the other across her chest, his hands clasped around her. He put his chin on the top of her head and told her, “Call me when you need me.”

She nodded, “I’ll call when I get in.”

“Keep me updated?” He asked, and when she nodded again he told her, “Say the word and I’ll come up there.”

She didn’t respond to that, she just tucked herself tighter against him, and Shea kissed the top of her head before he let go of her and she looked up at him and said, “I’ll call you in a few hours.”

He nodded and leaned down, kissing her softly before he told her, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She told him, kissing him once more before she grabbed her carry on size bag and made her way through security.

It wasn’t until she was all the way through security, sitting at her gate drinking a coffee that she unfolded her flight information papers and read them. Shea had spent the extra money to get her on the flight that only had one layover, she would spent three hours in Seattle before the hour long flight back to Kelowna. She smiled gently and pulled out her phone, texting him once more to say, Thank you. I love you.