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Opposites Attract
.:Chapter 1:.
June 4th, 2014
It's been seventeen days since my dad was taken to hospital because of a car crash, fifteen days since he passed, and ten days since I've muttered many words to anybody I'm not comfortable around, which, not surprisingly, is almost everyone except my sister. Spirit, my twin sister, still speaks, though. I feel bad about not talking to my sibling's friends, not that I used to much anyway, but over the last fortnight, I've come to realise I don't deserve my voice. I don't deserve to eat either, but Spirit thinks otherwise. I certainly do not deserve to live, but leaving Spirit alone? Well, now that would just be selfish of me and I'm already being selfish enough by living. But, I couldn't leave my only family member...
Could I?
Should I?
No and no. Now stop quoting My Chem before you cry.
Come on, Wolfie. Be happy! Today you get to see bands! Watch live concerts! Meet your heroes!
Le sigh, the voice is right, as it is most of the time. Not always, but more often than not.
It was right when it told me I should 'listen to different music, not that crap you hear on the charts now'.
It was right when it told me 'rats are amazing pets'.
It was right when it told me 'suck it up, everybody dies in the end'.
I admit, it was wrong when it told me I'm a 'waste of space' and our triplet, and only brother, Kion, committed suicide to 'get away from me'.
Kion was the oldest of us. Three minutes older than Spirit, who is eight minutes older than me. Spirit, our father, and himself called him Kion. I didn't. I called him by his full name, Kiongozi. It's Swahili for 'Leader'.
See, our father's grandparents were from Africa, and, even though my father, brother, sister, or I were not born or raised in Africa, he wanted to keep our African heritage. Spirit and I, we go by our middle names. Spirit's first name is Malaika, which means 'Angelic'. My first name is Nzuri, meaning 'Beautiful', so I'm Beautiful Wolf, but everybody calls me by nickname, which is Wolfie, if you hadn't realised.
Leader, Angelic Spirit, and Beautiful Wolf. What a family!
Whoa, is that the time, 06:08 am?! Last I checked, it was just turning five! Better get Spirit up. Unlike me, she has the ability to sleep, properly. I have been diagnosed with Insomnia, which means I don't sleep much, if at all, most nights. It's not something I enjoy, but it is a part of me that I have learned to accept, and it gives me time to think, too. The only downside to that being, I sometimes over think, and that's never really a good thing.
Oh, now it's 06:15 am, well, time to get Spirit up.
Warped Tour in just a few hours!
I grab my phone, iPod and headphones from the set of drawers at the end of my bed. I make sure my phone and iPod are fully charged, and I plug my iPod into the docking station in my room.
I can't remember who I listened to last on my iPod because I listen to Fall Out Boy on my phone at night, I guess I'll find out. I tap the screen and wait a few seconds for the doc to come alive and react.
"If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way. I would climb my way to heaven, and bring--" Oli Sykes of Bring Me The Horizon blasts throughout my room.
"Shhh! Quiet, Oli!" I whisper to my iPod as I press the pause to change the song something a little more suited to morning. Something a little less scream-y, something like You Me At Six, perhaps?
Yeah, they'll do, the voice tells me as I yawn.
I play their song 'Crash' on a lower volume prior to earlier, and pad into m en-suite. I use the toilet, brush my teeth, and wash my face before brushing and styling my hair, and applying my makeup. I managed to put on my eyeliner and mascara on before realising my crimson lipstick, that I love, oh, so dearly, is missing. I think I might have an idea where it is...
I retreat from my personal bathroom and stop my music, which is now playing 'Room To Breathe' from my YMAS playlist. I walk to the bedroom across the hall, Spirit's room, and knock fairly loudly. All I hear from inside is snoring. Spirit is a heavy sleeper, but, like, unrealistic. It's insane what she sleeps through, honestly. She could be carried through a tornado and not know what had happened when she finally wakes up! And then there's me, the little insomniac who's scared of hailstones and thunderstorms.
I enter Spirit's room to see her only half on her bed. Her feet are along the middle of the mattress and he torso is hanging off the end. She's lucky she got a low bed frame when she did because her head is touching the floor. I mean, if she had my bed, she would be on the floor completely. My bed frame stands fairly high off the ground, and I have two mattresses. I've lost count of how many times II've fallen off my bed when I'm awake! I dread to think if I could sleep!
I chuckle lightly at Spirit's sleeping position, then decide to try my latest idea of how to awake her... Suicide Silence.
I pick up her iPhone from the bedside table and unlock it. Password? Pfft, our father's birth year, most likely. Yep! Too easy. I open the YouTube app and search for 'Suicide Silence Wake Up'. Ahah! I make sure the volume is as high as the phone will allow, place the iPhone on the floor by her head, press play, and run out of her room, grabbing my crimson lipstick on the way out, of course!
It's been seventeen days since my dad was taken to hospital because of a car crash, fifteen days since he passed, and ten days since I've muttered many words to anybody I'm not comfortable around, which, not surprisingly, is almost everyone except my sister. Spirit, my twin sister, still speaks, though. I feel bad about not talking to my sibling's friends, not that I used to much anyway, but over the last fortnight, I've come to realise I don't deserve my voice. I don't deserve to eat either, but Spirit thinks otherwise. I certainly do not deserve to live, but leaving Spirit alone? Well, now that would just be selfish of me and I'm already being selfish enough by living. But, I couldn't leave my only family member...
Could I?
Should I?
No and no. Now stop quoting My Chem before you cry.
Come on, Wolfie. Be happy! Today you get to see bands! Watch live concerts! Meet your heroes!
Le sigh, the voice is right, as it is most of the time. Not always, but more often than not.
It was right when it told me I should 'listen to different music, not that crap you hear on the charts now'.
It was right when it told me 'rats are amazing pets'.
It was right when it told me 'suck it up, everybody dies in the end'.
I admit, it was wrong when it told me I'm a 'waste of space' and our triplet, and only brother, Kion, committed suicide to 'get away from me'.
Kion was the oldest of us. Three minutes older than Spirit, who is eight minutes older than me. Spirit, our father, and himself called him Kion. I didn't. I called him by his full name, Kiongozi. It's Swahili for 'Leader'.
See, our father's grandparents were from Africa, and, even though my father, brother, sister, or I were not born or raised in Africa, he wanted to keep our African heritage. Spirit and I, we go by our middle names. Spirit's first name is Malaika, which means 'Angelic'. My first name is Nzuri, meaning 'Beautiful', so I'm Beautiful Wolf, but everybody calls me by nickname, which is Wolfie, if you hadn't realised.
Leader, Angelic Spirit, and Beautiful Wolf. What a family!
Whoa, is that the time, 06:08 am?! Last I checked, it was just turning five! Better get Spirit up. Unlike me, she has the ability to sleep, properly. I have been diagnosed with Insomnia, which means I don't sleep much, if at all, most nights. It's not something I enjoy, but it is a part of me that I have learned to accept, and it gives me time to think, too. The only downside to that being, I sometimes over think, and that's never really a good thing.
Oh, now it's 06:15 am, well, time to get Spirit up.
Warped Tour in just a few hours!
I grab my phone, iPod and headphones from the set of drawers at the end of my bed. I make sure my phone and iPod are fully charged, and I plug my iPod into the docking station in my room.
I can't remember who I listened to last on my iPod because I listen to Fall Out Boy on my phone at night, I guess I'll find out. I tap the screen and wait a few seconds for the doc to come alive and react.
"If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way. I would climb my way to heaven, and bring--" Oli Sykes of Bring Me The Horizon blasts throughout my room.
"Shhh! Quiet, Oli!" I whisper to my iPod as I press the pause to change the song something a little more suited to morning. Something a little less scream-y, something like You Me At Six, perhaps?
Yeah, they'll do, the voice tells me as I yawn.
I play their song 'Crash' on a lower volume prior to earlier, and pad into m en-suite. I use the toilet, brush my teeth, and wash my face before brushing and styling my hair, and applying my makeup. I managed to put on my eyeliner and mascara on before realising my crimson lipstick, that I love, oh, so dearly, is missing. I think I might have an idea where it is...
I retreat from my personal bathroom and stop my music, which is now playing 'Room To Breathe' from my YMAS playlist. I walk to the bedroom across the hall, Spirit's room, and knock fairly loudly. All I hear from inside is snoring. Spirit is a heavy sleeper, but, like, unrealistic. It's insane what she sleeps through, honestly. She could be carried through a tornado and not know what had happened when she finally wakes up! And then there's me, the little insomniac who's scared of hailstones and thunderstorms.
I enter Spirit's room to see her only half on her bed. Her feet are along the middle of the mattress and he torso is hanging off the end. She's lucky she got a low bed frame when she did because her head is touching the floor. I mean, if she had my bed, she would be on the floor completely. My bed frame stands fairly high off the ground, and I have two mattresses. I've lost count of how many times II've fallen off my bed when I'm awake! I dread to think if I could sleep!
I chuckle lightly at Spirit's sleeping position, then decide to try my latest idea of how to awake her... Suicide Silence.
I pick up her iPhone from the bedside table and unlock it. Password? Pfft, our father's birth year, most likely. Yep! Too easy. I open the YouTube app and search for 'Suicide Silence Wake Up'. Ahah! I make sure the volume is as high as the phone will allow, place the iPhone on the floor by her head, press play, and run out of her room, grabbing my crimson lipstick on the way out, of course!