Chasing Stars

Chapter 9

Morning came to soon but I stumbled out of bed after my alarm. Gerard dropped me at school and I reluctantly went to my first class.

Walking into Math class I saw a very tired and sick looking Jeremy. I sat next to him and pulled out my bottle of ibuprofen I carried with me. I offered him some and he accepted. "I see the swim made you sick?" I asked stuffing the bottle back in my bag.

"Yeah, how do you feel perfectly fine? I couldn't even move yesterday and today I still feel like shit," he said.

"Oh yesterday I wasn't feeling the best but us New Jerseyans know how to polar bear dive." He gave me a weak smile.

"How much trouble did you get into?" He asked letting out a cough after.

"Not much he integrated me and then let me go to bed. You?"

"My mom didn't even know I was missing," he said with a fading smile.

"Does she normally?" It was an odd comment for him to make. We didn't talk to much about our parents. I didn't expect Gerard to know I was gone but if my mom was still here, she have known and I wouldn't have come close to getting away with it.

"We are not talking about that," he stated point blank as the teacher stood up from his desk.

"Okay, sorry," I said tucking my hear behind my ear.

****************************************

The rest of the day was uneventful with the exception of being questioned by everyone about why we jumped and how it felt. Jeremy and I were walking down the hall laughing after school. He looked like shit but was still smiling and joking around. When we exited the building I gave him a hug before turning toward Gerard's car. I got in and greeted Gerard and buckled up. He didn't say anything to me, just stared at me.

"Seriously what?" I asked looking at him while, I readjusted my backpack.

"Want to tell me something?" I thought about it for a moment but couldn't come up with anything I needed to tell him.

"Nope. Nothing new," I said slightly confused at his statement.

"Is he your boyfriend," he said starting the car engine but still looking at me.

"He who?" I asked very confused.

"Jeremy?" I laughed for a second, quickly realizing that he was being serious.

"No, why would you think that?"

"Because that was a very friendly hug." His eyes looking me up and down for a sign of a lie.

"Gerard, you're doing it again," I said pushing my hair out of my face and looking at him.

"Doing what?" he asked as he finally began to drive.

"You're judging my friends," I groaned getting irritated with him by the second.

"I'm not judging, I'm asking you if he is your boyfriend."

"No Gerard, he is not. He's a friend, that's it."

"Good, keep it that way," he said with a confused face. I rolled my eyes. "So we made an appointment for you with a doctor for your headaches." I groaned and starred at him. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing at all." I looked outside.

"Are you still mad at me about this?" he asked as we drove home.

"Nope," I said shortly.

"All right. Do you want to talk about what might be causing them?"

"Nope," I said shortly again.

"Are you going to be like this all night?" he asked glancing at me from the side.

"Probably," I answered, continuing to look out the window.

"Tell me what's going on," he said simply. I turned and looked at him. It was as if a small fragment of a memory played in the back of my mind.

"What?" I asked slightly confused.

"Tell me what's going on, why you are acting like this," he said simply turning down the street we lived on.

"I'm not acting Gerard, this is who I am. Take it or leave it but I'm not changing," I said in a snotty voice. I was sick of dealing with him.

"Excuse me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. I could tell I was getting to him.

"Just leave me alone alright!" I yelled at him. He pulled the car over and looked at me. I refused to return his gaze and looked out the window.

"Look at me," he said in a stern voice. I obeyed. "Loss this attitude right now."

"Or what?" I said without thinking.

"Or your grounded," he said plainly. I through my body back against the seat and kicked the floor. "Done?" he asked referring to my tantrum. I looked out the window and didn't answer. He pulled away back to the street and I pulled my seatbelt off. He immediate stopped the car on the empty road. "Put that back on Rylynn." I didn't listen and continued to look out the window. Gerard put the car in park and reached over grabbing my seatbelt. I slapped his hand but he retaliated by grabbing my hand.

"Ouch," I dramatically yelled.

"Do not slap me," he said locking eye contact. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. I looked down at my shoes, as he grabbed my seatbelt and buckled me back in. We made it the rest of the way home without speaking. Gerard turned the engine off and was about to exit the car, when I spoke.

"I don't want to go to the doctor, I don't want to be poked and prodded again. You don't know what it was like." I spoke barely above a whisper.

"You mean after the accident?" Gerard asked. I nodded.

"I'm fine, I really am," I pleaded to him looking in his eyes. "I just…" I couldn't express what I was thinking. I couldn't explain what I was feeling. In part because I didn't know how i felt.

"Then talk about it." I looked at him confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Tell me how you know you're fine. Rylynn, I'm worried about you. I know you don't believe me. I know you think that I don't care or that this family is to different from how you and your mom lived. But I do love you and I want to know you are safe. If you can tell me how you know that you are fine, then I'll cancel the appointment." There was silence.

"I used to eat at lot of sugar, that's why I have the headaches because i don't anymore," I lied the only way I could think of. Gerard gaged me for a moment.

"Alright," he said not completely convinced.

"You don't believe me," I said simply.

"You're right I don't because even if that was the case, the headaches would have stopped a month ago."

"Whatever it doesn't matter," I muttered. I opened the door to the car and walked inside and up to my room before anyone could stop me.

****************************************

I was upstairs reading my english book when I heard my phone ring. I looked at the caller ID to see Derek's name pop up. I looked at it for a moment debating on whether to answer the phone or not. I missed Derek but every time I spoke to him I remembered what I lost. I silenced it, placing the phone on my nightstand. I didn't want to talk about my past and I didn't need him to remind me what I was missing. I continued reading my book until I heard Lindsey yell my name for me to come downstairs. I set my book aside and wandered downstairs.

"What's up?" I asked pushing my hair out of my face.

"Oh you have a phone call," she said pointing to Gerard briefly while helping Bandit put shoes on. I looked at Gerard to see him talking on the phone. I walked over and sat next to him waiting.

"Ah, she's here," he said pulling his phone away from his ear and handing it to me. "It's your friend Derek." I rolled my eyes receiving an odd expression from Gerard.

"Seriously, did you not get the hint with the bitch button?"

"Rylynn," Gerard schooled me for my language but I didn't pay attention.

"Well at least now I know I didn't imagine that. What did I do this time?" Derek asked in a sweet voice. Gerard went back to sketching whatever he was sketching.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Well then, I'll just tell my Mom you don't want any baked goods. I'll also tell the guys you don't say hi and I won't tell you about our last gig."

"I don't need food."

"Yeah well Mom won't listen to that, besides it's to late, Gerard already gave me your address."

"Great," I said throwing my hands in the air.

"The guys miss you," he said in a cunning voice.

"No, they don't."

"Yes they do and all the fans miss you as well. In fact, there were tons of them shouting your name." His voice sounding sincere.

"I don't want to talk about the band." I muttered turning away from Gerard.

"Rylynn what's wrong?" The question instantly pissed me off.

"Everyone needs to stop asking me that," I yelled into the receiver.

"Fine. I miss you and ah, there is something else." Derek's voice got soft. He never really avoided talking about anything with me. We were great friends.

"What is it?" I said with concern in my voice. This got Gerard to turn from his sketch but only for a moment.

"The band was talking about Sun Fest and… Rylynn you got us that gig." Derek stated hesitantly.

"What's your point," I asked softly.

"You are the reason we have the invite and no one what's to play if you aren't there." His words hit me like a ton of bricks. In all of my selfish actions, I never wanted to hold the guys back. I never wanted to destroy their dreams.

"Oh," was all I could say. The change in my demeanor gained the attention of Gerard.

"You should come back. If only for that show," Derek suggested.

"I'm not going back. This is my choice not yours and and theirs. Derek I don't want to talk," I said rubbing my forehead.

"Fine. Love you girl and I'll talk to you soon."

"Yeah, love ya too." With that we hung up. I handed the phone back to Gerard. Gerard looked at me for a moment.

"So, you don't want to go back to Jersey?" Gerard asked curiously.

"Not right now," I muttered. My head was into a full blown throb. I rubbed it with my fingertips praying it would stop.

"Hey Linds, could you grab some IBprofin?" He shouted just as Lindsey and Bandit were about to leave. A moment later to walked over with the bottle and handed it to Gerard.

"We'll be back later," she said kissing Gerard's cheek and giving me a smile. Gerard set his sketch down and slide toward me.

"Here," he handed me some medicine and his water to drink. I took the medicine and thanked him.

"Maybe you should tell me about why, just to get it off your chest."

"Maybe you shouldn't tell people where we live," I said raising my eyes. "I don't want to talk Gerard."

"You really need to loss this attitude you have today," he finally said looking at me in an authoritative way.

"Yeah I know," is all I said. "I'm going to go do my homework."
♠ ♠ ♠
Hope this chapter was worth the wait. Let me know what you think.

Comment/Subscribe/Recommend please

~Nailsntacks