Floss

My phone woke me up. I had it placed on the window sill as my room didn’t have enough space on either side of the double bed to squeeze any sort of table. The noise merged into my distant dream to begin with and it wasn’t until several rings later that I realised what was happening and groggily lifted my head from the pillow. The stretch to clasp the phone seemed took more effort than expected and I flopped back as I flipped it open and pressed it to my ear.

“Hello.”

“You sound awful.” I squinted, pulling the phone from my face and glaring, still half blind at the screen. “Logan, seriously it’s half four in the morning here.”

“Is it?” I groaned at his confusion. “I thought you were five hours behind.”

“Eight hours.”

There was a moment of silence, “Oh…sorry ‘bout that.” He laughed as I huffed again and I pushed myself up against the headboard of the bed, smothering a yawn. “How are you doing anyway Floss? So much for ringing me!”

“I’m fine.” I seemed to be saying that word a lot lately, “It’s not as bad as I thought to be honest. The house is nice enough, and the town is so small and literally in the middle of the forest and the sea. It’s a really nice place.”

“Met anyone interesting yet? Teddy was saying you were due a big trip to meet some of Carrie’s family?” I nodded, leaning to push my glasses onto my nose, the room coming into focus. “Floss?”

“Sorry. I was getting my glasses. Yeah we’re going today, well, this evening. Still got loads of unpacking to do. You already been to your morning lecture then?”

“Yep.” He popped the word, and I could hear cars in the background as he no doubt made his way home. “Olive’s not due back till later on though so I’m gunna treat myself to a beer and an old Match of the Day.”

“Living the high life there,” I teased, feeling a more awake state overcome me. He didn’t reply and the light tone of the conversation seemed to shift. I bit my lip, realising how dehydrated I was, “How are you? I am sorry I didn’t ring, I know you spoke to Teddy and Dad said you rang him in the morning so I didn’t want to…”

“I’m fine.” There was that word again, “Just weird knowing you’re all practically half way around the world.” He paused, although I could practically feel the tension within him.

“Well, we’ll be back and forth and you can…”

“I’m not saying I’ll never see you again, am I?” His words were a knife and I refused to take the bait, my relationship with my older brother had never had any issues and I wasn’t about to let some start now he was three thousand miles away. “It’s just…shit. I don’t get why you had to all move. It would have made more sense for Carrie…”

“Well,” I paused, feeling my own flicker of irritation. “They couldn’t, so we’re here.”

“Still a ridiculous…” I let him ramble, retracting the device from my ear slightly. Logan’s problem was bigger than us being a long flight away, his problem was Dad moving on. From the minute Dad had returned from that business trip to Seattle and had come home with an odd little grin and a new passion for emails he’d hated it. He didn’t blame Carrie particularly, and there was nothing to blame her for, Mum died seven years ago and Dad met Carrie just as four long years of him being alone had passed. But still, he didn’t seem to like her and was perpetually awkward and slightly cold. His stubbornness was something I really hoped I hadn’t also gotten from our Father.

“Logan.” I had to say his name several times to get him to stop. “Moaning isn’t going to change anything and you’re just…”

“I’m just what?” There was a dangerous edge to his words.

“You’re just being a bit of a knob to be honest.” I waited for the recoil, already scolding myself for rising to it but I was just met with several choking laughs. “That’s fair.” Just like that the conversation was back on track, “You are okay though, yeah? Any slip ups or you’re struggling and you know you can ring me, any time.”

“How about half four in the morning?” He laughed again and I managed a chuckle, “Does that suit you?”

“Anytime at all.” The subject drifted off on a completely different track and by the time he wished me a final goodbye it was far closer to six am than four and the sky outside was starting to brighten. I instead buried myself deep in my covers. The next time I was woken it was Teddy wanting to explore Forks. His enthusiasm was still on a high and I didn’t want to dampen that. A shower and shoved on outfit later, swapping usual heels for some more comfortable trainers, we were out of the door. “I don’t really think we’ll manage to get lost.” Teddy had waved Carrie off, “Floss has her phone anyway. We’ll be fine!”

The rain hadn’t yet started as we stepped out, although it was clear it would be again raining throughout the day. “I don’t think Carrie was exaggerating with the weather.” I grumbled under my breath, checking my hood would be sufficient. “God you whine.” Teddy teased, prodding my side and avoiding my swing in retaliation. “It’s like being on holiday.”

“Forever.” He lifted a brow, starting off down the short drive, “Well okay, not forever.”

“Could be. Or do you think you’ll leave when you’ve finished school?”

“What and go back to England?” He shrugged, “I don’t think so. I don’t like the idea of being so far away.”

“Like Logan.” This time my shoulders lifted and fell.

“He made the choice, he could have come.” I stopped my brother before he spoke again, “I’m not saying he should have, I’m just saying.” He lifted his eyebrows, a habit we both shared but kept silent, slowing so I could walk beside him. “Wanna go in the woods?”

“Is there anywhere to go that isn’t in the woods?” He grinned, declaring he wanted to at least follow the primary road through town and get an idea of what other shops and bits there were. I let him have his way, eyes scouring again over the odd landscape. Instead they landed on movement just ahead of us, it was Bella, the girl from the evening before leaving her house with a heavy jacket on. I called out to her with what I knew was an awkward wave before Teddy could ask. So far she was the only person I knew; and by all accounts, not that Carrie and Dad knew too much about her she seemed nice enough. She shot me a closed mouth smile but didn’t stop, slipping into a silver car parked outside her house. We were just passing it, Teddy about to ask as discreetly as he could manage who she was when the drivers door opened and a body popped up.

Teddy leapt out of the way to avoid Bella’s door as she too flung that open, stumbling over an apology as she realised how close she had come to whacking my little brother. He waved her off and I let my attention fall on the driver.

It was far harder in truth to let my attention go anywhere else. He had to be around our age, and from the way Bella’s eyes kept flickering back to him I knew he had to be her elusive ‘trouble maker’ boyfriend. Charlie, her father had mentioned that much to my Dad. I dragged my eyes away from him, hoping I’d done so quickly enough that it didn’t look like I was staring. “You’re not starting at the school today then?” He spoke rather than Bella and I shook my head, Teddy interjecting, “Monday probably…”

“Oh, sorry. I’m being rude. You know Bella…” He didn’t phrase it as a question and although by no means did I know Bella I nodded. “Charlie introduced us last night.” Bella seconded my statement. “This is Edward.” She seemed reluctant, “My boyfriend.”

“Ah,” He shot me a fiercely dazzling smile, his teeth looking especially white, especially compared to his already pale face. “Well, this is my Edward. My darling little brother.”

“Teddy.” He pulled a face at me, “Nice to meet you mate.” Edward returned his nod with a slightly bemused expression. I don’t think boys nodded at each other as a way to say hello around here.

“How are you finding it so far, it must he quite a shock to the system?” If Bella hadn’t told him our accents had given it away. Teddy answered again, and they exchanged a few polite comments back and forth. My attention was no longer glued on Edwards face, although in a more populated setting I would have allowed myself longer to admire him. He was beautiful but in such an odd way.

Instead I was more intrigued by Bella’s reaction to this whole situation, she hadn’t seemed comfortable last night which was fair – I was basically being forced on her, but even now she seemed more interested in the way her sleeves slightly covered her palms. Every couple of seconds her gaze, under her eyelashes, went back to Edward as if she couldn’t stand not looking at him for that long.

She wanted to be alone with Edward, that was absolutely fair enough but the way she slipped into the car once the boys had finished talking and smiled without meeting anywhere near my eyes struck me as odd. Edward maneuvered the car to avoid splashing us and they drove off in the direction of the high school. “Something was weird about that, wasn’t it?”

Teddy didn’t respond for a few seconds, by which time I was already convinced I’d just imagined how odd it had all felt. “I dunno, she seems shy.”

“Mmmm.” I felt my lips purse. “Shy, or rude.”

He scoffed, “Maybe she was worried you were going to try and steal her boyfriend.” He didn’t catch me rolling my eyes at him. “She is punching well above her weight to be fair.” This time I made an indignant noise. “Oh give over. You pretty much had love hearts as eyes Floss.”

“I so did not.”

“You so did too.”

The effort of moving seem to hit everyone later that day. Carrie was napping, or at least attempting too. My father was dead on his feet, he had a job interview on Monday; several more lined up in case that one went poorly. He’d been successful in London, different roles in marketing over the years and I’d always been aware he was quite powerful in the corporate world. That world was different now, and the closest significant city was Seattle which was nearly four hours away. He’d applied for some ridiculously well paid executive position there but with travel he’d have to practically live in Seattle during the week, or spend half his day driving. It was a last resort, which was obvious. The others jobs were in Port Angeles and paid less. That wasn’t as much of an issue to him, money didn’t seem as important as it once had.

Regardless he was majorly stressed and had buried himself in several old presentations, editing his resume within an inch of its life. He’d snapped at Teddy so we’d decided to let him be.

The day passed in a tired blur after that, we dozed in front of the television; I woke up with two dead legs and his head heavy on my hip. Before I knew it, it was time to get ready for what had started as a small dinner at Carrie’s sisters’ house. I’d overheard her on the phone to Allison talking about how much food she would have to bring for Sam’s friends.

Plural. When I found a moment to ask her she’d looked sheepish. It was nothing like a small ‘get to know you dinner’ and far more of an all you could eat barbecue. “Weather depending of course.” She’d simpered, patting my arm in a comforting gesture.

The news made me feel even more nervous, I didn’t mind meeting some people and I’d play it as cool as possible but my stomach was still in knots. We all knew just how important first impressions were and what was I supposed to have in common with people – my only link was the woman who still wasn’t officially my stepmother. I’d swallowed, and spent longer than I suppose I should have had on an outfit. I had to look half presentable, not like I had tried too hard but just hard enough.

“Who are you trying to impress?” Teddy had teased, dressed simply in jeans and a long sleeved shirt as he sprawled over my bed. “What?” He shoved himself up, tugging on the end of a curl that had taken far too long to get even. “Oi,” I slapped at his hands but he avoided me. “I’m trying to make a decent first impression.”

“You’re going to be a nightmare on the first day of school aren’t you?”

“Probably.” I surrendered, making sure I hadn’t gotten any spots of mascara on my eyelids.

“You look fine, come on. We need to go in a minute.”

“Alright,alright!” One last ruffle of my curls and I follow him downstairs, slipping on my boots and a jacket. It’s not raining but, as ever, it looks like the sky may erupt at any given time. We clamber into Dads ‘new’ pre-owned car and we’re on our way. Carrie tells Dad which road to take and its pretty much straight on from there. Again, stomach bubbling uncomfortably, I take the time to look at the scenery and we reach La Push swiftly.

It’s very different from Forks, the whole feel of it. Houses are closer, smaller, it’s more like a village with the constant swooshing of the tides within earshot. A little haphazard and thrown together but perhaps even nicer than Forks. Carrie stops Teddy before he practically leaps out of the vehicle, again his nerves give way to easy excitement. “Emily, Sam’s fiancée.” She waits for us to nod, we recognise the name. “A couple of years ago she was in an accident out in the woods…” Her lips form a pout, “Just make sure no-body stares, okay? It really upsets Sam and it can’t be nice for the poor girl.”

“Of course we won’t.” I promise, hoping my voice doesn’t betray my prickle of irritation and offence at her words. Did she think we were absolute idiots? Obviously we weren’t going to stare and make someone uncomfortable. I was still seething when we started down the short pathway, unfortunately as easy as I found my younger brother to read, he was just as perceptive. “I know she didn’t mean it like that before you even start Ted.”

“Wasn’t starting anything.” His grin manages to raise a smile from me as the door open and light bursts upon us. Carrie is quickly tugged into a light hug before the woman turns her attention to Dad.

“Sure you’re alright?” The concern is heavy in his voice.

“I’m good.” I want to say a little more, to tell him to make sure he enjoys himself, talks to whoever he wants. Neither of us really want him feeling like he has to keep peering over my shoulder. Instead I’m smothered by a woman who, with my heels, only comes up to my shoulder blade. Her arms are deadly tight and I’m actually aching when she lets me go, her hands slipping to gently hold around my elbow as she looks me over. “Florence….or Floss?”

“Er…” Her dark eyes tighten and I realise she’s not really asking me, just making up her mind.

“Florence for now I think. You don’t know me too well yet.” I’m set free and instead she goes through much of the same with Teddy. Although he answers her question, “Okay, Florence and Teddy. I’m Allison. Carrie’s far lovelier older sister.” Her smile is painfully wide and she looks around us at someone I just miss sight of. “Paul, get Sam and Emily will you!” Her tone is still motherly but it becomes sugar when she turns back to us. “Sam’s gone to help get the barbecue started. How are you both? Settling in okay?”

We go through the usual niceities when two bodies enter the kitchen, the first is hulking. No fat, but not particularly muscular like a body builder. He’s just large. Easily six and a half feet and suddenly I feel unusually dwarfed. He grins, he looks older than twenty, more mature and his voice is baritone. “Nice to meet you both, Mums not been giving you a hard time?” Teddy responds as I shake my head before again, strong, and in this case, scorching arms coil around me.

“It’s really nice to meet you. Step-cousins and all.” Allison rolls her eyes and Carrie tuts. Teddy however laughs quite loudly, and any sense of tension seems to vanish.

Sam moves back, letting Carrie introduce my father properly and the second body moves closer. It’s clearly Sam’s fiancée, his eyes land on her every few seconds as if he can’t bear the idea of spending too long without the sight of her face. It reminds me of how Bella had been with her Edward, no less intense.

Emily instead comes up beside Allison and I understand Carrie’s warning although I’m very careful not to let my eyes linger on the long lines running down one side of her face. The scars are deep, they look like claws and drag down one eye and the corner of her mouth. She’d have been beautiful without them, and in truth, even with they don’t mar her appearance when she smiles. She does this as she greets me and I enter my third hug of the evening, although this one is far gentler. “It’s nice to finally meet you. Carrie’s always talking about you.” I must pull a face I’m not aware of because she laughs and her face lights up. I can feel Sam’s adoring gaze on her.

“How much of a cook are you?” I assure her not much but it doesn’t deter her and she ushers me a couple of steps further into the small kitchen. “Don’t worry. I know how loud and intimidating they can all be. Carrie suggested I keep you out of the way for a bit. We’ve lost your brother though.”

We had completely, he was no longer in my eye-line although it was easy to catch his accent in the mix of voices. “He’s good with things like this.”

“Confident.” She offered, smiling lightly again. “Sam’s so happy you’ve all finally moved here. He and Carrie are close and she’s been so happy with your Dad.”

This almost feels like a question. “They are.” I confirm, and out of the corner of the eye I see them animated in conversation. “Who’s here then? Carrie made it sound like a small family dinner when she first bought it up.” Her smile is guilty, and the undamaged side of her mouth lifts comically.

“This is a family dinner.” My expression makes her laugh again and her hand rests on my arm.

“Believe me, I thought my family was big but La Push is practically one massive family, even if not by blood.” I nod, there’s suddenly a loud roar of laughter from the other room and Allison vanishes to no doubt tell them to quiet down. “I feel sorry for the neighbours.”

“They’re here as well.” Emily muses, “I’ll introduce you to everyone in a while…if Carrie doesn’t mind.”

“She won’t.”

Emily is easy company and the conversation starts to flow as she has me baking rolls and chopping up various vegetables for the salad. She fills me in on the guest list, from the neighbours to Sam’s large group of friends to Emily’s own cousins and Aunt. Ever so often the chorus of laughter and raised voices seems to swell and people filter into the lounge and garden.

I meet a few people as they come in on the hunt for food, Emily’s cousin Leah does little more than glance at me but clearly has more on her mind whilst her younger brother Seth is talking a hundred words a minute with Teddy about some game that was going to be released soon. It is clearly a close knit group and I’m thankful Emily, who seems fairly quiet is here. It must have been intimidating for her when she first met Sam and therefore the rest of the family. I say this and she laughs, although it isn’t as sincere as earlier on. I’ve clearly touched upon a nerve or awkward situation so I bit my tongue and instead let them take control of the conversation.

Allison and Sam pop in regularly to check how we’re doing, Each time he enters Sam touches Emily in some way, he links a hand or touches his knuckles over the scarred side of her face. It feels so intimate that I keep averting my eyes. “Any of the guys come in and introduced themselves yet?” He asks, ignoring Emily’s hit at him as he grabs several slices of cucumber. “Only Seth and Leah.” Emily says softly, and Sam’s brows meet. “So rude.” He chews hard and swallows, “I’ll make sure they do.”

“It’s okay.” I say quickly, I’m feeling pretty comfortable and I don’t want to ruin that with a mass of teenage boys appearing. The only impression of them so far is how loud they seem to be; they sound like the type of friendship group I would have previously avoided. That’s unfair and I know it, so I plaster on a more realistic smile as Emily pecks his cheek.

“Don’t bring them all in at once, they’ll demolish the kitchen and we’ve only just about finished. Are you cooking outside yet?”

“Paul and Jared are.” Emily lifts a brow and Sam does that deep rumble of a laugh. I ignore the inside joke but they don’t exclude me from the conversation and another few minutes pass before Sam leaves. We somehow move from food to their upcoming wedding and Emily seems to glow as she speak about Sam, it’s the kind of excitement I wish I could feel over someone so I fire question after question at her; the date (not until the next year at the earliest), ideas about the venue, her dress, their wedding party.

“Honestly, at the rate we’re going Carrie will have given birth and marr-…” Her cheeks flush suddenly, as if she’s said something I’m not supposed to know. I feel a crinkle form above my eyes, is it because she’s possibly revealed a plan of Carrie's or because she worried mentioning my father marrying her will upset me?

“Me and my brothers have bets on when Dad will propose.” She’s not as quick to the change of topic as I’m striving. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

“You didn’t do anything, don’t worry.” I wave her off, “I love Carrie, and more importantly, so does Dad.” I shrug, “I know Carrie would rather they were married before she’d gotten pregnant but there you go…” I trailed off a tad awkwardly, but by now Emily had recovered.

“What do you reckon then? What’s your bet?”

“Well, we all thought when Carrie said she was pregnant – but nothing. So I think when Carrie’s in labour.”

She chimes a laugh again, “Romantic.”

“I know!” My nose wrinkles, “I think he’ll want to do with before the baby is born. Teddy thinks after, like on a tv show when the nurse puts the baby in Carrie’s arms. Really like, romantic and touching and blah.”

She’s halfway through the story retelling Sam’s bumble of an attempt to propose to her the first time when a couple of boys, verging on men enter. One of them, a little shorter but built like a tank comes up to me with a hand held out, ready for me to shake.

“Quill, really?”

“It’s how the British say hello isn’t it?” I can’t stop myself from laughing and accepting his hand, he’s a tiny bit shorter than I am in heels but his hand easily covers mine and his handshake is a little too hard and warm. “Florence,"
“Quill Ateara, a pleasure.” His attempt at some sort of James Bond persona is awful and Emily joins in our laughter as he retracts his hand. “Honestly Quill,” she scolds, “You’re so embarrassing.” He talks over her, tossing a hand dramatically towards his friend, “I have the honour of presenting Paul…”

He doesn’t end up presenting anyone, instead as a third person enters, shovelling a hot dog into his mouth the one named Paul turns and I can see his body is rigid with tension. He pushes past the new arrival and out of the front door. I can’t see any reason for his sudden turn, and Emily’s mouth sinks into a deep frown.

“What’s up with him?” Quill voices the question all three of us are thinking out-loud. “Jared?” The boy who had just entered shrugs, waving to me as he jogs to the door and sticks his head out. “Dunno, he’s gone though.”

“That was weird, even for Paul.” Quill twists back to face me, “Paul’s not got the greatest er…temperament.”

“That’s underselling it.” Jared contrasts, “We’re done Em- you want a hand bringing stuff out? Sorry, nice to meet you Florence. I’ll go grab Paul after I’ve eaten.”

We’re all arranged at the table and eating within a few minutes, I’m opposite another of Sam’s massive friends, Jacob who looks a little somber. Emily seems to have adopted me this evening, which I'm thankful for, and is on my left side, she whispers that he’s had a hard time lately although it doesn’t seem to have affected his appetite. All of the boys were eating like they hadn’t in weeks and it was making me feel a little nauseated as I picked at some potato salad.

Jared eventually arrives without Paul, although there’s an odd expression on his face and he leans down beside Sam, hissing in his ear. I can barely seem Sam, blocked by Emily’s head but I hear a muffled exclamation. “He’s what?!”

Jared stands to his full height, looking like he’s trying to hold down a smile. Several of the rest of the friendship group pause from eating, as if they’ve heard the quiet exchange.

Jacob shakes his head and glances down the table. Before the meal returns to normal his eyes linger on me a second too long.