The Elastic Heart Trilogy: Someday I Will Understand

Riley sat in the middle of her bed with tears streaming down her face. She had her bedroom door shut but it only muffled the yelling from downstairs. She couldn't remember a time that her parents had fought. Sure they disagreed about certain things but never anything like this. She couldn't understand what they were saying and she was scared of what would happen once the yelling was over.

She didn't understand what was going on. When she was at Brad's she had heard the ringing of her iPad from the kitchen. With hopeful eyes she ran into the living room to get it only to see that it was in Mike's hands and he was talking to her Mommy. He didn't know that she was standing right beside the couch until it was too late. The words were already out of his mouth before he could stop them.

"We need to talk about our daughter Jenna!"

At first Riley thought that she had a sibling that no one had told her about. Brad had tried to usher her out of the room and that's when Mike realized what he had said. She had grown up thinking that Brian was her father but instead he was just the guy that raised her. She wasn't really a Haner like she thought. She was Mike's daughter and not Brian's.

She had clung to Jen's side the second that she came to get her. She didn't want to believe what Mike had said. She wanted it to be a lie but now that she could hear the yelling from downstairs she knew that it was true. Brian only screamed when he was upset and right now he was furious. Riley was never suppose to know that Mike was her father.

The sound of the front door slamming made Riley jump. It was so quiet now that you could hear a pin drop. She wondered what had happened and jumped again when there was a knock on her bedroom door.

"Riley?"

She watched as the door opened and her Mom slowly walked in. Climbing off of the bed Riley ran across the room and into Jen's waiting arms.

"It's okay baby." Jen whispered holding her tight.

"Where's Daddy?"

Jen pulled back slightly and brushed Riley's tears away gently. "He was upset so he left."

"Is he going to come back?" Jen could see the fear in her eyes. She knew what Riley was thinking. She was afraid that Brian wouldn't be her Daddy anymore.

"He will. He just needs some time to cool off."

Riley nodded and went back to climb up onto her bed. Jen followed.

"Do you have any questions?"

She nodded. "Is what he said true? Is Mike my real Dad?"

Jen sighed and took Riley's hand in hers. "Yes. He is."

She frowned. "I don't understand Mommy."

Jen explained it to Riley to best way she could. She didn't give her the full details but told her what she needed to know. She also reassured her that it wasn't her fault. She didn't want Riley to blame herself for any of this.

"Mommy?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm scared."

Jen was confused. "Of what?"

"Daddy."

"Oh baby. Come here." Riley climbed into Jen's waiting arms and rested her head against her chest. "Daddy's just upset but not at you. You know he would never hurt you right?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

"I don't want you to worry about any of this okay? Nothing is going to change." Jen hoped that was true. She didn't want anything to change either but she couldn't help but wonder if it would. She was terrified that Mike would now try to take Riley from her.

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

Jen smiled and kissed Riley's forehead. "Of course. How about we order some food and watch a movie in bed?"

Riley smiled. "Okay."



Brian didn't sleep that night. He had way too much on his mind. He needed to apologize to Jen for the way he acted. He didn't meant to fight with her but he was angry and she was the only one there to take it out on.

He was now on his third cup of coffee. This one from Starbucks and not his coffee pot. He was heading to Los Angeles. He needed to give Mike a piece of his mind.

It was bad enough that Riley had overheard him tell Jen that he was her real father but he had no right to tell Jen that he planned on fighting for her. That he still loved her and wanted to make things right. He wanted them to be a family and Brian was not going to let that happen.

He felt terrible that he had cancelled on Riley but in the end it was worth it. He had received a call from his girlfriend and when Brian arrived at her home he found her in bed with another man. The man was her fiance. She had only dated Brian to get money from him. Money she thought she deserved more than Riley. Brian ended the relationship on the spot. He knew he should have never gotten with her in the first place. He was lonely and hoped that being with someone else would help him finally get over Jen.

It didn't. Being with someone else only made him want her more and now that Mike being in the mix again he knew he needed to do something to keep his family together. To keep Mike Shinoda as far away from Jen as he could.

Brian walked into NRG Studios where he knew Mike would be. He found him in one of the control rooms and made his way inside. No one else was there which Brian was thankful for. He wasn't in the mood to deal with anyone else.

"You and I need to talk."

Mike turned to look at Brian and leaned back in his chair. "Yes we do. Like how you're going to back off."

"Excuse me?"

"You don't need to play Daddy to my daughter anymore. I'm here for her now."

"Oh yeah? What suddenly changed because if I remember correctly you wanted nothing to do with her when Jen told you she was pregnant?"

Mike sighed. "I know and I regret that. There's a lot of things that I should have done differently but I can't change the past. If I could I would."

"Riley doesn't need you. I've given her everything she's ever needed and more. She needed a father and I made sure she had that. What have you done for her?"

Mike got up from his chair and got in Brian's face. "She wouldn't exist if it weren't for me. Jen came to me when you rejected her. I am Riley's father, not you."

Brian licked his dry lips and smirked. "Is that so? Then tell me why is my last name on her birth certificate and not yours? You may be her father biologically but legally she's mine."

"And what about Jenna? Is she yours too? Last I checked her last name was still Depp. She fell in love with me once I can easily make her fall in love with me again."

Before Mike could duck Brian's fist slammed right into his face. He stumbled back but remained on his feet.

"If you know what's good for you you'll stay away from Riley and Jenna. You lost any rights you had the second you told Jen that you didn't want Riley and I will never let you take Jenna away from me again."

Mike chuckled and wiped the blood from his lip. "Yeah? And what are you going to do about it?"

"I'm going to fight for her."

"Yeah right. It's been how many years since she told you she wanted you? You honestly think that she still wants you now? You're never going to win. Her heart still belongs to me."

"That's where you're wrong." Brian pointed his finger in Mike's face before turning and walking over to the door. "If it's a war you want then it's a war you'll get but trust me. It's a war you will not win."

Opening the door Brian walked out and slammed it shut behind him.



"I'm sorry Boogie!" Cali apologized as she practically chased him around the backyard. He was throwing his annual end of the summer barbecue for Riley. He started this tradition when she started kindergarten.

"I don't want to hear it."

The barbecue had been planned a few weeks before and Brian was now wondering if he should have just cancelled it.

"I really am. Stop." Cali grabbed Brian's arms and forced him to look at her. "I don't know what else I can say to you Boogie. If I had known that Mike was there I wouldn't have.."

He narrowed his eyes. "You didn't give two shits who was there. All you cared about was your fuck fest with Chester."

"Please Brian. Tell me what I can do to fix this."

He yanked his arm from her grasp. "I think you've already done enough."

Heading inside the house he found Riley sitting on the couch with her iPad in her hands. She hadn't said a word since she and Jen had arrived and opted to stay inside instead of being outside with her family.

"Hey Peanut.."

Riley looked up at him with a sad look on her face. "Hi."

Brian slowly walked over and sat down on the coffee table in front of her. "Can we talk?"

She shrugged. "I guess so." She handed him her iPad and watched as he sat it down on the other side of him.

"I'm sorry if I scared you yesterday. I was upset and.."

"Mommy told me."

"She did?" Riley nodded. "Did she say anything else?"

"She said that I shouldn't be afraid. That you would never hurt me."

"And she's right." Reaching out he gently took her hands in his. "I will never ever hurt you. You're my little girl."

"Am I his little girl too?"

Brian frowned. "Not if you don't want to be. Listen Riley.. I know this is confusing but if you ever have any questions your Mom and I will answer them as honestly as we can." He told her as Jen walked in. He motioned for her to join them and watched as she walked over and sat down next to Riley.

"I do have a question."

"What is it?"

She took a deep breath before asking. "Do I have to call him Daddy?"

"No baby." Jen answered and kissed Riley's head. "You don't have to call him anything if you don't want to. Brian's still your Daddy and he always will be."

"That's right." Brian piped in. "I'm not going anywhere and we're still the same family we've always been. We don't want you to worry about any of this okay? But I want you to know something.. now that you know the truth if you don't want to call me Daddy anymore... I understand."

"What would I call you?"

"Uncle Brian I guess." He shrugged.

Riley shook her head and made a face. "No way. You're my Daddy not my Uncle Brian." She practically jumped into his arms nearly knocking him over. "But Daddy?" She whispered in his ear.

"What?" He whispered back.

"I still want you to marry Mommy."

"Don't you think I should go out on a date with her first?"

She giggled. "Yeah I guess."

He smiled and gave her a squeeze. "I love you Peanut."

"I love you too Daddy."



Jen smiled as Riley got on the school bus. It was her first day of school and Riley insisted on taking the bus instead of getting a ride. She had only ever ridden the bus on field trips and told Jen that if she changed her mind she could start taking her again.

"I can't believe she's back in school already." Jen said from where she stood in the driveway. Brian was right beside her.

"Tell me about it. This summer fucking flew by."

"It sure did."

"So are you heading to work now?" Brian asked following her into the house.

She shook her head. "Nope. Now that Todd and Lucy are back I can actually take a day off."

"Did you have any plans?"

"Well, I thought I'd go grocery shopping and do some laundry. Sounds so exciting huh?"

"Not really." He chuckled then got a serious look on his face. "Hey, can we talk?"

"Sure."

Brian and Jen sat down on the couch in the family room. He seemed nervous and Jen couldn't figure out why.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah um.." He quickly got to his feet and began to pace. "I need to tell you something and I'm not sure how to do it."

"Okay you need to calm down." She got up and grabbed hold of his hands. "I'm sure that whatever it is I can handle it. So what is it?"

Brian looked down at their hands before looking up and into Jen's eyes. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. I feel like there is something missing in my life. I know what it is but.. I've kind of been avoiding it for years and..." He trailed off.

"Okay um you're going to need to tell me what it is because you're confusing the fuck out of me and--"

"I love you."

"What?" She asked softly.

Brian once again looked down at their hands and entwined their fingers. "I love you Jenna and when I told you that I didn't have feelings for you.. I lied. I thought that.. we'd be better off as friends. I didn't want to fall even harder for you and have you leave me but.. I only ended up pushing you into his arms and.. the next thing I knew you were pregnant. At first I didn't know how to handle it and that's why I left.

When I was talking to my Dad I thought about how you grew up without your Mom and how your Dad was always away for work. I didn't want your baby to suffer and miss out on things like you did. I wanted your baby to be loved by two parents and I was already in love with Riley because I already loved you. I didn't care that she wasn't mine. I still don't. I just wanted her to have people in her life that truly cared about her and.. I didn't want you to have to do it alone. I wanted to be the one to help you raise her.

And watching you with her.. I only fell in love with you all over again. You'd do anything for her and that's how I am about you. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner and I know that this probably comes as a huge shock but.. I had to tell you. I know it's been ten years since you told me you had feelings for me and I'm sure you don't feel the same way anymore but--"

"Shut up Brian."

He quickly shut his mouth.

"Do you really mean everything you just said?"

He nodded. "I do. Everyone kept telling me that I should grow a pair and tell you but I was too afraid of losing you. I honestly thought I had when I found out about you and Mike.. then Riley came along and I thought maybe I'd have another chance. But I need to know.. did I just pour my heart out to you for nothing?" He asked the last part quietly. His fears from when we was a teenager were surfacing and he prayed that she wouldn't reject him like he had done to her.

"It really hurt when you said that you didn't want me. Everyone kept saying 'Brian's so in love with you' but I didn't believe them. I thought that Mike would be the one to help me get over you but in the back of my mind every time I was with him I only thought of you. Your words may have hurt me but they were nothing compared to the pain I felt when Mike said he didn't want Riley. I honestly had no idea what I was going to do. I didn't want to raise her alone and.. then you came along. You wanted to be her father no questions asked. I'll never be able to thank you enough for that." She paused when he smiled.

"And no.. it's not for nothing. When you held Riley for the first time I wished that she was actually yours. I watched you with her and it made my feelings for you come back. Almost like they never left. Everytime you got a new girlfriend it scared me that maybe she was the one for you and that you'd run off with her. I was jealous. I'd look at you two and wish that I was the one kissing you instead of her..."

"Well you don't have to worry about anymore girlfriends. The only lips I want on mine are yours." He said as he pulled her close. Brian let go of her hands and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Do you still love me?"

"I never stopped. "She said looking into his eyes.

"Neither did I." He mumbled leaning in and pressing his lips to hers. The second her arms wrapped around him he deepened the kiss. He had dreamt of this moment for years and now that it was happening he wanted more.

They slowly pulled away and Brian left a soft kiss on her forehead.

"So what do we do now?" Jen asked.

"That depends. Do you have to go to the grocery store right this second?"

She shook her head. "No."

He smiled. "Good." He kissed her softly and looked into her eyes. "Be mine Jenna."

"Only if you'll be mine."

"I've always been yours." He licked his lips and smirked. "You have no idea how much I want you but.. I don't want to go to fast for you."

"Brian, we've been in love with each other for how long? Trust me this isn't going too fast. I think it's actually going a little slow."

He raised an eyebrow. "Jenna Mercedes are you saying what I think you're saying?"

She shrugged and stepped out of his embrace. "Maybe."

"Run. Now."

She took off running with Brian hot on her heels. It only took seconds to catch her and he picked her up bridal style in his arms.

"I'll be gentle. I promise."

"I love you."

He smiled at her. "I love you too."