Explosions

“Just three months after her breakup with J.J. Watt? I mean, come on. You go from having the Defensive Player of the Year – someone who’s in the running again, might I add – to someone who hasn’t even really performed until the time most players start thinking about retirement. It’s a no-brainer.”

“It has nothing to do with fame. Don’t you think if it did, she would have moved to another by now?”

“What’s to stop her?”

“Love? Maybe?”

“How is she in real life? We haven’t seen much of her aside from these scandals.”

“She’s unbelievably sweet. Fitz wasn’t joking when he said she was the greatest woman alive.”

“Are they formally dating?”

“Yes. They announced it last week. I think she’s been kind of dealing with, you know, obviously the breakup. She didn’t want to make it seem like he was a rebound or anything.”

“Is he a rebound?”

“No, they are very much in love.”

“Look, the fact is that she is the talk of the NFL”-

“No, she’s not. You’re making her the talk of the NFL. The talk of the NFL is actually what’s going to happen here on Sunday. If that’s not what’s on your mind, you shouldn’t be doing this. You should be at TMZ or something.”

Charlie bounced Dean on her knee in the waiting room of the hospital. The Ringold family and the Newhart family sat around her waiting for news to arrive. Ryan came back holding a sippy cup of water and a Styrofoam cup of lemonade. He handed the sippy cup to Dean and sat down next to Charlie.

“Any word?” he asked.

“No,” Charlie replied.

“How are you holding up?” he said.

“I’m here,” Charlie sighed. “I’m keeping it together. I think I’m okay.”

Ryan smiled and put his arm around Charlie’s shoulders. She poked Dean’s nose and he giggled.

“Big brudda!” he shouted.

Charlie smiled and said, “Yes, you’re going to be a big brother.”

Ryan leaned over and kissed Charlie’s cheek. He glanced up at the television and saw his friend and teammate, Brandon Marshall, talking on an ESPN show. He looked away quickly, and he took Charlie’s hand.

A doctor entered the waiting room, and everyone stood up.

“Mother and baby are both healthy,” she said. “Mrs. Newhart is resting right now.”

The entire waiting room breathed a sigh of relief. June had gone into labor two weeks early, and there were complications early on when she came in. Charlie and Ryan had gotten there earlier that evening, catching the first flight into Seattle from all the way across the country. She had called Chuck when she arrived at the airport, explaining the situation to him. She’d been excused from the next couple of days from work.

Ben came out shortly after the doctor left the room. He smiled as Dean jumped off Charlie’s lap and ran to him. He hoisted his son onto his hip and took a seat across from Charlie.

“She’s so beautiful,” he said. “I can’t wait for you all to meet her. She’s so little and beautiful and…and…”

Tears filled Ben’s eyes, and Charlie put her arms around him. Dean kissed Ben’s cheek.

“Daddy no cry,” he said with a smile. “Babby sissy here now.”

Ben took a few deep breaths and said, “I know. It’s just so overwhelming.”

Ben’s father put his arm around his son. He smiled, waiting for Ben to come to his own senses. Ryan took Charlie’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She turned in her seat and leaned into Ryan’s arms. She listened to Ben telling his parents about his new baby girl as she drifted in and out of sleep.

It was another hour before Charlie could go in and see June. June, who was beaming despite how tired she looked, was ecstatic when her friend walked through the door. In her arms was a tiny baby wrapped in a soft pink blanket. Charlie felt her heart skip a couple beats, and she put a hand over her mouth to stop from making any noise.

“Lyanna Elizabeta Newhart,” June whispered.

“She’s absolutely gorgeous,” said Charlie.

She pulled a chair up near her friend’s bed and rested her head on the rail. She and June sat there in silence for a long time, watching Lyanna breathing softly. Charlie reached out and touched the baby’s hand. Her fingers were so tiny, even compared to Charlie’s dainty hand.

“We want you to be her godmother,” said June.

Charlie turned and looked at her friend. June smiled at her, and Charlie’s eyes filled with tears.

“Really?” she said. “Oh my god, June…I would be so honored.”

“I wanted you to be Dean’s, but tradition and…whatever,” June chuckled.

“June, I would love to be her godmother,” Charlie said.

Lyanna stirred a bit, but June rocked her gently.

“How are you and Ryan doing?” she asked.

“Good,” replied Charlie. “He’s going to stay at my house during the offseason so we can be together. We haven’t really figured anything else out past then.”

“And you’re holding up okay?” June said.

“I think after I got over the initial shock of the breakup, I was fine,” said Charlie. “I felt…I don’t know how to describe it. I loved J.J., but it was just different. Olivia helped me a lot too.”

“Yeah, how’s she doing?” said June.

“She’s great,” said Charlie. “She’ll be moving to London in a couple months.” She shook her head and continued, “I’m proud of her, but I can’t believe she’s going to London.”

“You’re jealous aren’t you?”

“Of course! She thinks she’ll spend a week in Paris, too.”

Charlie groaned but smiled. June shifted in her hospital bed and looked down at her little daughter. Lyanna yawned, and Charlie stifled a squeal. The little girl was so precious.

“We’re going to let Dean hold her when she wakes up,” said June. “He seems a little restless right now, and I don’t want him to wake her. Do you want to hold her?”

Charlie nodded silently, and June carefully placed Lyanna in her waiting arms. She felt so fragile, and Charlie was terrified that if she even moved wrong, she would break her somehow. Lyanna’s eyes fluttered but didn’t open, and the sudden movement cause Charlie’s heart to skip about ten beats. She felt tears well up in her eyes again, but this time she couldn’t wipe them away.

“When are you going to have some of your own?” asked June.

Charlie shrugged and said, “I haven’t thought about that in a long time. J.J. and I only talked about it once, but he didn’t want any until he was at least 30. I know Ryan wants kids, but we just started dating again.”

“Okay, well, you let me know,” said June. “I don’t want to sound too much like my mother, but your biological clock is ticking.”

Charlie stared at June a second before June burst out into a fit of laughter. Charlie pursed her lips, trying to keep silent with the baby in her arms. They both looked over as the door opened. Ryan peeked his head in and smiled.

“Sorry to interrupt,” he chuckled. “June, your parents are wondering if they can come in yet.”

He glanced over at Lyanna, and his eyes lit up. Charlie smiled and looked back down at the baby girl in her arms.

“Oh my god,” breathed Ryan. “She is gorgeous.”

“Thank you,” said June. “You can send them in.”

“They can wait,” Ryan said, waving her off slightly.

June laughed as Ryan approached Lyanna. He touched her cheek gently and made a soft cooing sound. He gently stroked her fingers and watched her eyelashes shudder. He put a hand on the back of Charlie’s chair and leaned down to look at her a little closer. Lyanna’s eyes fluttered open, and Ryan found himself staring into the brightest blue eyes he’d ever seen.

“Hi, precious,” he said, reaching down to take Lyanna from Charlie’s arms.

Charlie observed Ryan bouncing the baby gently in his arms. Despite how tiny she felt in Charlie’s arms, she looked even smaller in Ryan’s. Her heart swelled, and she looked over at June. June’s face broke into a grin.

“I have a feeling it’s going to be another few minutes before my parents get to see their granddaughter,” she laughed.

---

“I thought for sure you’d have a date tonight. What happened there?”

“You know, I thought about asking a few people, but there’s really no one that comes to mind right away. I’ve had fun flying solo tonight. Is that such a crime?”

“No, certainly not. You just had surgery, and you just won Defensive Player of the Year. Houston was out of the playoffs the first round this year. Next year, Super Bowl 51 will be in Houston. What’s going through your head right now?”

“All I’m thinking about now is just how to get better. I’ve been told a lot of times that I put the team’s losses solely on my shoulders. I’ve gotta get focused on how to better not only myself but the team. You know, these rookies look up to you and it impacts them how you take the losses yourself.”

“Do you think being single will have an impact on your season next year?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No. Charlie encouraged me a lot and pushed me a lot. She was a lot of my drive when we were dating, but then my drive switched to…you know, what made me angry? What pushed me over the edge to continue my drive toward a playoff win?”

“And what was it?”

“Pain. Mostly, I had a lot of pain going through my mind. And I say my mind because in my heart, I’d already lost her. I knew that. Um…however…”

“…yes?”

“…however, I think it’s better this way. I think Charlie’s happier. I think, eventually, I’ll be happier. It makes sense.”

“Understandable. J.J. Watt, thank you for joining us.”

Charlie turned off the television and fell back against the bed. Ryan sat up, running his fingers through her hair. She looked up at him and smiled, and he smiled back at her. She turned on her side.

“You’re moving some of your stuff next week, aren’t you?” asked Charlie.

“Yeah, not all of it,” Ryan replied. “I was thinking when football season rolls around, you could spend the weekends at my place.”

Charlie smiled and said, “I’d like that.”

They were silent a second. She kissed his knee and turned back onto her back. He cleared his throat.

“Charlie, I don’t think I ever apologized for what happened with you and J.J.,” he said.

“You don’t have to,” Charlie replied. “It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

“What happened?” he asked.

“I was still in love with you,” she said.

He smiled and said, “I thought so. Then I need to say I’m sorry for leaving you in the first place.” He lie down on the bed next to her and put his arms around her. “I swear to you, I’m never going to hurt you again. I was a moron. Don’t ever let me forget that.”

“I won’t,” chuckled Charlie. She put her head on his chest and added, “To be fair, we were both morons.”

“We’ll chock it up to being young, dumb, and in love,” said Ryan.

“We were only ever young and in love. Harvard students can hardly call themselves dumb.”

He laughed quietly. She closed her eyes and listened to the rhythm of his heart beating in his chest. She slowed her breathing to match his, and it wasn’t long after that she drifted off to sleep. He looked down at her. In a million years, he had never imagined she would be back in his arms.

He watched her for a while, so peaceful and unmoving. Her chest rose and fell in a steady pattern. He continued to run his fingers through her hair. It felt more calming to him than it probably did to her. In some ways, she hadn’t changed at all. She still looked and felt like the same woman he fell in love with so long ago.

His heart ached in that moment. He had missed so much of her life. If he hadn’t been such an asshole to her, who knows where they would be. He shook the thought from his mind and sighed, squeezing her a little tighter.

“I swear on my life, I’ll never hurt you again,” he whispered.

He leaned down and kissed her forehead.