End of the Day

I watched the kids outside dashing across the yard from my dark, bland room. They wore bright jerseys with beaming smiles on their faces. I wish Tommy could have that. I wish we could have that. I would give anything to know the feeling of the cool breeze, the sound of laughter, the feeling of loving someone, other than family, unconditionally. I always imagined what it’s like to walk outside and hear the satisfying crunch of the glistening snow or the dry , colorful leaves under my feet, or even watch the sun go down and the moon rise. I guess I’ll never know because I can’t leave Tommy. I mean even if I made a desperate move and escaped this hell hole where would I go? I’m sixteen with no knowledge of the outside world, no job, which means no money, and a crappy home school education. I mean I took Driver’s Ed online for god’s sake. The only person outside of the family I know is Uriah. He’s the same age as me and is kinda cute in my opinion. Well, I don’t really know what a hot guy looks like but I think he would definitely be one.

My mom has no knowledge of his existence and I have to keep it that way. When Charlotte goes and picks up guys he sneaks over to the house and comes in through my temporarily unlocked, creaky bedroom window. Once he’s in safe he plays with Tommy and helps me cook. If there’s no food he’ll bring something over, if we need some more Goodwill clothes he will deliver them to us. He’s a decent guy that understands me. Well, not my lifestyle but the way I think. He has big goals and dreams just like me. He cares about me and Tommy more than my mom ever has, which is pretty easy to accomplish. If I were to make a desperate mood he would help me. But right now, my place is with Tommy. He needs me more than I need him.