Blush.

It was freezing in the streets, so I welcomed the warmth when I walked into my apartment. I could hear Frank and Quinn yelling at each other, their voices ringing through each room loudly.

“Well it’s not my fault! He probably doesn’t even want to see you after the way you acted earlier!” Frank shouted.

I followed the shouting and found them in their room, at opposites sides and glaring at each other. They didn’t notice me at first, continuing to glare and shout at each other. Quinn was the first to notice me.

“Umm…Gerard, hey,” he mumbled, shooting a worried glance at Frank. Frank didn’t say anything at all and neither did I. I stood in the doorway and stared at both of them with a blank expression; we were all silent.

“I’m going out. I don’t know if I’ll be back tonight,” I announced, emotionally void. Quinn and Frank exchanged a quick glance and Frank spoke up.

“Where are you going?”

I turned to Frank and stared at him, still with no emotion and blatantly lied. “To Mikey’s.”

Quinn remained silent. Frank’s mouth dropped open and he spoke softly, “Are you leaving us?!”

Not answering his question, I turned and walked from the room. I wasn’t going to leave them, of course I wouldn’t. I’d tell them that before I left – if I did – but, now, I didn’t want to talk to either of them. I was being a bitch and being absolutely horrible but I was still hurt. Not at Frank, but at Quinn.

Was I being unreasonable? Was I being irrational? I don’t know.

Once in my room, I started packing a small bag with normal stuff to make the blatant lie I had told more believable. When I turned Quinn was standing at my door with the saddest expression I’d ever seen grace anyone’s face.

“We need you, Gerard,” he whispered so softly that I almost didn’t hear him. I didn’t answer; I continued to stare at him trying to keep a straight face. I couldn’t do it; I caved, I like to be a little over-dramatic but I can never follow through. My face crumpled and I looked over at him guiltily.

“I’m not going to leave you guys. I never was and I never will,” I replied with a small, guilty smile. The look on Quinn’s face was indescribable; he was shocked, confused, happy, and euphoric. The list goes on; I don’t think his expression settled on one emotion at all.

I put my bag down and walked over to Quinn to hug him. Frank walked down the hall just as I embraced Quinn and I saw jealousy flash across his face. I pretended not to see it and I smiled at him over Quinn’s shoulder.

“Hey Frank,” I murmured, watching as a smile spread across Frank’s face aswell.

“Hey, Gerard. Does this mean you’re not leaving?” he replied with curious eyes.

“I was never leaving in the first place, you know me. I’m drama queen,” I mumbled, a little ashamed of myself for lying and saying that in the first place. I saw Frank’s eyes dart to the half packed bag on my bed and he raised an eyebrow at me.

“I packed it because I was mad,” I said guiltily, letting go of Quinn and standing in front of him and Frank awkwardly. I didn’t know whether or not I should hug Frank as it may cause more problems…

“Look Gerard I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been such a dickhead about it,” Quinn mumbled avoiding my eyes, “If you want to be with Frank that’s okay with me.”

“Why do you think I want to be with Frank anyway? Have you even asked me if I like him and listened to my answer? I don’t like him that way, Quinn! He’s just a good friend; as are you,” I burst out.

I looked from Quinn to Frank, but my gaze stayed on Frank. Shit! Wrong answer; I was too quick for him. I saw his face fall before he could blank out his face. I frowned because I realised that maybe Quinn – and probably James – was right. Maybe he did like me a little.

“Quinn? I want to talk to Frank for a moment…Alone, if that’s okay,” I said softly, my eyes only leaving Frank’s face once to glance at Quinn. Quinn’s eyes darted between Frank and I before he answered hesitantly.

“Yeah, I’ll go and put the kettle on. Do you want anything?”

I shook my head, but Frank asked for a hot cocoa. Once Quinn had left the room Frank met my stare with his own cautious one.

“So what did you want to talk to me about, Gerard?”

“Well…it’s about something that Quinn said earlier,” I replied, softly. Frank remained stubbornly silent, waiting for me to go on. I studied his posture and expression trying to figure out what was going on in his head.

He caught me staring at him, making me blush crimson and smile timidly.

“Well…?” he pressed. I decided it would be best if I got straight to the point.

“Be honest. Do you like me?” My voice was barely a whisper, I spoke so softly. I was scared that I might embarrass him or make him angry. I waited for his reply, looking down at my feet; too scared to look at his face now. I heard the door to my room being shut completely, it wasn’t before, and I looked up out of curiosity.

Frank was staring at me, leaning against the door, his expression giving away nothing. We stared at each other for god knows how long, me curiously and he blankly. I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to prevent the blush that was creeping up my cheeks at an alarming pace. It didn’t do much.

“So…?” I asked, my voice coming out as a squeak. I met his eyes when I spoke but I quickly looked down at my feet, eager to get this awkwardness over with. When I still received no reply I looked up at Frank again, many questions in my eyes. He just stared at me like before, the only difference this time was that he was walking slowly across the room to where I was.

I waited for him; immobile where I stood, but confusion still swept across my expression in huge waves as he got closer. When he was just in front of me; close enough to touch me, he stopped and continued to stare at me.

All his staring was beginning to freak me out, so I returned his stare with a panicked, confused one. Why the fuck won’t he answer me?!

“Frank…” I murmured softly, unable to keep my gaze from glancing down at his lips. Before I could react his hands were at my waist, pulling me forwards until my lips crashed with his. I resisted at first, shocked beyond belief but as Frank’s lips moved against mine I gave in to the kiss.

Our lips moved together in a passionate lock, Frank’s arms pulling me closer and closer to his body. All control over my body and mind had been lost just seconds after Frank’s lips had met mine. I was breathless when Frank finally pulled away. Breathless and exhilarated.

My eyes must have been vacant and dazed, because Frank grinned at me a little cheesily. But that expression didn’t last for long; he was soon back to Mr. Blank Face that didn’t reveal much.

“I don’t know. Should I?” he whispered softly, finally answering my question. His breath tickled my face and it smelt sweet, like mint. His eyes were soft yet somehow steely. His expression blank yet holding so much emotion. He was so open and honest yet so contradicting. He left me in a world of wonderful confusion.

Then, breaking our gaze, he walked out of my room, shutting the door quietly behind him without even a backward glance. He walked out that fucking door, leaving me here alone without a proper answer too. “I don’t know. Should I?” What type of answer is that?!

And then the questions were back. They came flooding back like a tsunami; but this time of a different sort.

Did I like Frank?

Did Frank like me?

Why did he kiss me like that?