Endlessly

"It's okay that we don't go anywhere far away, right? My wings are already cramping up." Jack asks once he pulls out of the driveway, trying to ignore how strange it is for him to say his wings plus the unnatural angle said wings are contorted into. This car is not meant to house the giant wings of one, let alone two beings.

Alex just nods, staring out the window. It hasn't been long since they left the house, but regardless, Alex hasn't so much as opened his mouth or even glanced at Jack since then. Jack taps his fingers on the steering wheel, driving aimlessly while trying to figure out why the angel is so quiet. Much as he tries to stay quiet and give Alex space, patience has never been one of Jack's strong suits, and within minutes he cracks. "What are you thinking about?"

A shrug is his main answer. "Nothing."

"You haven't said a word to me since we left the house, and you're avoiding looking at me." Not to mention the tension that chokes out the air in the car. "I know you don't want to talk to me, or even be near me. But I'm trying to help you out here; the least you could do is give me an explanation as to why you're ignoring me." Jack is trying to swallow his anger as much as possible. His words come out harsher than he intends them to.

"You offered to help me, but if this is really that important to you..." Alex sighs. He turns his face towards Jack to see him motion to continue. "At dinner I kept having these little realizations about you and me and our futures." Jack hides the shiver in his spine as Alex mentions their future. "Like, we barely know each other but we're getting fucking binded in 3 months."

"But you know it will feel like so much longer." Time was a concept that differed in human and supernatural beings' eyes. A human month was similar to a year in the world of supernatural; it's another reason Jack's parents were so surprised when Alex told them when the binding would be. They got binded within days of meeting each other. Alex's parents weren't much better, getting binded exactly one week after meeting. Supernatural pairs are decided in advance by God and Satan, so there's never any reason to wait. Jack suspects the only reason they have so much time to prepare is because of the human side of them, scared and faulty, begs them not to make a mistake of this magnitude.

"Yeah, I guess." He grumbles, folding his arms over his chest and resuming looking out the window at the passing scenery.

"What else?" Jack prods.

"What do you mean 'what else'?"

"You still look like you're hiding something. You're uncomfortable."

"Just nervous, I suppose."

"About?" Angels don't get nervous to pray, do they? If God is the all knowing being they claim Them to be, then what does Alex have to be afraid of?

Alex shifts in his seat, leaning against the door. "I don't know if this is a good idea, Jack. Demons don't pray, and after last night...do you really want to face Them?"

He's about to tell Alex how utterly ridiculous he is and that God doesn't scare him - okay, that might be a slight lie, but Alex doesn't need to know that - when he realizes Alex's is uncomfortable not because he's upset with Jack or nervous, but because he's embarrassed. "Yes, Alex, I do. You're clearly really worried about this; I'm not just going to leave you to deal with this alone." A voice in his head questions why he even cares in the first place, but this is not the time for an internal crisis, so he pushes the thought to the back of his mind for now. "Are you embarrassed of me or something?"

"No!" He answers quickly, but Jack believes him. His face is genuine. "You're not the one I'm embarrassed of." Jack's eyebrows crease as the car begins to slow, turning off the paved road and onto dirt. Alex elaborates after a deep, calming breath. "I'm embarrassed because it's like I can't control myself around you. From puberty to figuring out I was gay to having my first boyfriend," Jack doesn't even try to hide the noise of displeasure he makes when Alex mentions an ex. He makes a mental note to ask about him later. "I've never had a problem resisting...urges like this. But from the second we met, it seems like all of my rules have gone out the window, and I can't stop it."

Without thinking, Jack reaches a hand over to Alex's thigh for no other reason but to comfort, much like how he's seen people do before. When Alex jerks away as if he's been burnt, Jack feels a jab to his gut. "Should I not touch you?" Jack bites his lip.

"Not until we're binded." Alex responds after a moment of silence.

Jack huffs and stops the car. "Right. We're here." He jumps out of the car, trying to ignore Alex's pleas.

"Jack, I didn't mean it like that! You know what I'm talking about."

Why is he hurt by this? Jack doesn't feel emotional pain. He causes it. Yet here he is, feeling like a reject. He could go out there and get any human or demon he wanted; why is he so hung up on this angel? No one has ever even heard of an angel/demon couple. "Whatever, Alex. Just go pray. We'll talk about this later."

He doesn't have to go anywhere. You know that, Jack. I'm always with him. A voice unfamiliar to Jack that makes Alex's face light up fills their minds. A passerby wouldn't hear a thing, but it can't be ignored by the two. I'm quite impressed that you came out here with him, though. You're the first demon I've talked to since, well, Satan.

Jack acts like he's not at all bothered by this sudden voice in his head, crossing his arms over his chest and pulling an annoyed expression as if this happened all of the time. Fuck, could They read Jack's mind? "I couldn't leave him alone, and there was no way he was driving my car. I think my parents might be a bit upset if we prayed in their house, too." By upset he means they probably would burn the place down out of sheer rage.

Jack finds it a bit silly, talking to thin air, but Alex's face holds awe. "You-You're the only one?"

Jack shrugs. Truth be told, he's just as surprised. There have been demons who got kicked out of hell for being too good; he'd always assumed they talked to God at some point. "Guess so." Jack turns his attention back to God, ready to get this conversation over with and get the hell out of here. He's slept all day, but still, his bed beckons him. Between his stunt in the morning and the healing process of his wings incomplete, it's really no surprised he's as tired as he is. "So I guess I don't have to tell you why we're here, right? You're the 'All-knowing' Themselves."

You're correct, but I would prefer if you did tell me in your own words.

Something about the wording reminds Jack of preschool, and he's always hated school in any form. "Cut the crap and tell us the answer to what we came here to ask. Forgive Alex and all of that shit."

"Jack!" Alex gasps. Somehow listening to atheists was better than this. At least atheists can't have something against a God they don't believe in. Jack, however, his entire being is made just for the sake of hating the Lord, being the evil God is not. The blatant disrespect forces Alex's mouth open.

Alex, he's fine. Remember, he has different rules than you. God reminds softly. They almost sound amused. Sometimes I forget how interesting demons are to talk with. Satan and I only communicate once every few years or so.

"Yeah, Alex." Jack taunts.

Alex's response is rolling his eyes. "We're here because I'm asking for forgiveness, Lord." He looks up to the sky. "Jack and I engaged in...sexual relations."

Jack snorts, and the angel is immediately distracted, shooting him a pointed look. Jack, I know you don't want to be here, but I would appreciate it if you respect my angel confiding in me, especially when he's repenting for a sin you helped commit.

"I was just doing my job." Jack grumbles, looking down. He reminds Alex of a insolent child, knowing he's in trouble but not wanting to give in.

There's a roll of thunder in the distance, and for the first time that night the demon's pulse spikes. "Alright, I get it. Carry on." He mimes zipping his mouth shut and the thunder ceases instantly. Jack's beginning to think God might have more mood swings than Satan, which he didn't think was possible previously.

You heard him, Alex. Please continue.

"I don't know how to stop it from happening again. I need your strength to keep me from giving in."

God's sigh is a soft breeze in the otherwise still night. I understand. Your attraction is expected. It's why I intend on matching my soul mates and binding them at almost the same time, so that we never run into this problem. The only reason I gave you so much time was because I knew how you would react to the news, but given your situation, I'd be happy to move the date up to as soon as possible. I can't have my angels sinning like this.

"Then why make me a full angel?" Alex explodes. "Better yet, why match me with a demon? I should be staying as far away as possible from temptation, yet here you want me to literally sleep with the enemy!"

His breath is staggered, and Jack can just tell he's sending himself into panic mode, choking himself with tears. Jack mentally curses God for going silent during this; it kills Jack to see Alex like that, and it hurts even more to know that the last thing he would want right now is comfort from Jack.

It takes a few minutes for Alex to pull himself back together, and by then Jack is dancing on his toes, desperate to do something. He can't hurt him and he can't help him. He's stuck on the sidelines, simply watching and breathing relief when Alex finally speaks again. "Why are you doing this?" He asks, voice hoarse.

You know I can't tell you that.

Fuck this whole "God's Plan" shit, Jack thinks.

"Please, Lord, give me something." Alex begs, falling on his knees.

Another breeze ruffles Jack's hair. There's nothing that can stop this. This is a fixed event in history, Alex. It may not be important yet, but it will be. Believe me when I say no one in all of eternity is more destined to be together than you two. Not even Adam and Eve, whom I created for bearing all of humanity.

Shock keeps both boys dead silent. How can they be perfect for each other if they can't stop fighting? How can they be more perfect than two people literally created for each other - better yet, created from one another?

"Why don't you just marry us right now, then?" Alex spits.

Because I don't want you to regret it, which you will if you force yourself into it before you're ready. The thought crosses Alex's mind that he might never be ready, but God can't lie. It would be a joke if the angel says he isn't absolutely terrified. How about we compromise?

Jack and Alex look at each other. Jack shrugs, leaving the decision up to Alex. "We're listening." He breathes.

Unless you decide to do it sooner for a reason other than getting it over with, I'll marry you in 90 days, whether you feel prepared or not.

His Lord has been so patient with him that Alex feels it would be unreasonable to deny the offer. One glance towards Jack tells him he's the only one not 100% on board with this plan.

What else can he do but suck up his pride?

***

"You've got that face again." Jack says when they're about halfway back to Jack's house. The demon has been in a great mood since they left the meeting with God. He's got Bring Me The Horizon in the CD player, and he thought Alex would surely reject that, especially when he blasted Crooked Young or The House of Wolves, but all he's gotten is silence. Sideway glances confirm what he's already thinking: Alex is once again in a shitty mood. "What are you thinking about that's got you all worked up?"

Alex's eyes don't move past his window as he sighs. "Free will."

Internally, Jack groans. Were all angels this melodramatic? "Care to elaborate?" He keeps his voice neutral - he's pretty sure he knows where this is going, but he doesn't want to jump the gun.

"You know what I'm talking about. I'm sure you've considered it too sometime in the past 24 hours." He adjusts himself so he's mostly facing Jack. "Unlike every other angel, I always thought my relationships would be the one part of my life that wasn't regulated or controlled. I could make my own decisions on who I wanted to date and not just wait around for God to choose 'the one' for me. But now that's gone, and I feel...I don't know, helpless? hollow?"

Instead of letting the words go to his heart (where they would hurt much more and be significantly harder to deal with) Jack lets them fuel his anger. "You know, you're right. I have thought about it. I thought about how I would much rather go out every night and get with my friends than sit in my room with an angel who hates me while I go through the worst pain in my life. I wish I could have a choice in who to love but whether your God and Satan are influencing it or not, at this moment, free will or not, I would choose you. Sleeping in a bed with you like we have been for eternity doesn't even seem like a bad idea anymore. I know I'm a demon and I go against everything you believe in, but you've never even given me a chance to prove that I'm not the worst being in the world! You expect me to be horrible, so that's exactly what happens!"

Jack's knuckles are white on the steering wheel as he knocks his head against the wheel, panting. Alex has no idea how long they've been in the driveway, but this is the first he's noticing it. Without warning, Jack throws open the car door, jumps out, and slams it shut before practically running inside, leaving Alex in shock, alone in the passenger's seat.

Did Jack just admit to having feelings for him?

He can't think about that right now. Today has overwhelmed him without the extra emotions added on. He keeps himself on autopilot as he follows Jack's example - albeit much more calmly - and makes his way to Jack's room. The demon's eyes are closed as he lays on the bed facing Alex, but his breathing hasn't quite evened out yet. Stripping of the jeans he's wearing, it takes Alex less than a minute to join Jack in bed.

When Jack pulls him close for the night, Alex tries to ignore how it makes his heart flutter and head spin.