Color Me Happy

aight folks I am well aware that someone already wrote a colorblind fic recently, but does it look like my rilex ass cares? no.

enjoy.

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Alex still remembers the first time it came up in conversation that Rian is colorblind. He was trying to order a new guitar online, but couldn't pick between red or blue. So of course he casually asked his best friend who was sitting next to him what he thought.

"Dude, I'm color blind," Rian laughed. "Don't ask me."

This lead to Alex freaking out because he honestly had no idea and he felt horrible for asking and how long had be known Rian and how did he not know this?

Something about it really bothered Alex. And not just then, but for a long time. Whenever he saw something colorful and beautiful, he was reminded that his best friend couldn't see the same thing. Rian didn't know any different, of course, and wasn't too bothered by it, but Alex couldn't let it go. He thought Rian deserved to see every sunset, every painting, the lights during their shows, everything. But there wasn't a way for him to do that.

Or so Alex thought.

He was casually browsing the internet one day when he saw a post about "Enchroma glasses." It was followed to a link to a video about a guy freaking out about seeing the color purple for the first time, and he was immediately interested. Was it possible that there were magical glasses to allow colorblind people to see color? Apparently so, because the more Alex looked into it the more he realized that this was Rian's only chance to see everything that he had been missing.

While the glasses were very real, they were very expensive. While playing in a band was a pretty sweet deal, it didn't exactly pay enough to buy your friend $400 dollar glasses right off the bat. So he saved every penny, went on less vacations, insisted on extra shows, anything to save up.

He was going to give Rian color if he had to spend all the money he had.

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It was December 18th, Rian's birthday. The glasses had barely arrived in time, which of course made Alex more of a nervous wreck than he already was. But when the package finally arrived at their apartment, he was relieved. But also still anxious.

Alex had to wait the whole day to give Rian his present. He wanted to give them to him first thing in the morning, but apparently Rian had made plans before Alex even woke up. Then, they got so caught up in Rian's party that there was no time for Alex to pull him aside. Alex hadn't told anyone about his gift. He wanted it to be a surprise for everyone. By the end of the day, they were both drunk and exhausted. The wrapped present remained hidden in Alex's closet.

Of course the first thing Alex thought of when he woke up was that he hadn't given it to Rian. (Okay, actually his first thought was about how hungover he was, but that's beside the point.) When they were eating breakfast, Alex casually brought it up.

"You got me something?" Rian asked.

"Of course dude, let me get it," Alex replied, going to his closet. He couldn't help but feel nervous. This was big. This wasn't just a gift. What if they didn't work? Alex tried to push all the what ifs to the back of his mind as he went back into the kitchen and set down the bag in front of Rian.

"Open it," Alex couldn't hold back an anxious smile. He bit his lip while Rian took the tissue paper out of the bag.

"You got me... sunglasses?" Rian said when he opened the bag, looking up at Alex, raising an eyebrow.

"Just put them on." Rian laughed and put them on.

"They're nice-" he started. Then he paused. "What..." he trailed off. He wasn't smiling anymore, just looking at the colorful paper he had just touched. "Alex, what are these?"

"How does everything look?"

"Are these what I think they are?" Rian asked, finally looking at Alex. Alex wondered how different he looked to him right now.

"Yeah," Alex said smiling.

Rian didn't reply, he just stared around the room.

"They work?"

"Yeah," Rian said quietly "Fuck."

"Oh, I almost forgot." Alex took out a picture of a rainbow that was also in the gift bag.

"What the fuck," Rian laughed when he saw it. He grabbed it and held it up. "Holy shit."

"Does it look different?"

"I've- I've never seen this before," Rian pointed to the purple color. "Or that one." He pointed to the pink.

"That's the color I dyed my hair for Warped a few years ago," Alex said. "Remember how you didn't like it cause you said it looked gray? It definitely wasn't gray." Rian looked up at Alex.

"Fuck, look at your hair now," he laughed again. He leaned forward and put his fingers in Alex's blue hair. "Holy shit."

"Do you like it?" Alex tried not to look nervous. And tried to be normal about the whole Rian's-hands-in-his-hair thing.

"I can't believe it," Rain just kept smiling and looking at Alex's hair. "This is crazy. I can't believe you did this."

"Want to go outside?"

"Fuck yeah!"

It took them about fifteen minutes to get out the door because Rian kept looking at everything. Alex just laughed and watched him. Finally, they were in front of their apartment complex.

"Good thing it hasn't snowed yet this year," Alex said. "But the grass is usually greener."

"How can it be greener than this?" Rian asked, looking around.

"And I wish you could see all the leaves on the trees."

"Look at that fucking car over there!" Rian pointed to an average looking red car. Alex laughed at how excited he was. "I can't believe how amazing this is! I've been missing this my whole life! I... fuck."

Alex realized Rian was crying.

"Are you okay?" he asked, not sure what to do. "Let's go back inside."

"This is kind of overwhelming," Rian admitted, covering his mouth with his hands. "This is incredible. I can't believe you got these for me."

"As soon as I found out about them, I started saving," Alex said as they walked back inside.

"Come here," Rian said as soon as the door shut, pulling Alex in for a hug. Alex was so happy that the glasses worked, that Rian could properly see the world. "I can't believe you did this."

"Of course, Rian."

"I love you for this, you know that?" Alex didn't respond at first; he just kept hugging Rian. Finally Rian pulled back to look him in the eyes. "I do. I absolutely love you for this."

As Alex looked back at Rian, something clicked in his head. Yeah, they were best friends and of course they loved each other. Surely Rian meant he loved him as a friend, maybe even a brother, right? But as Alex thought, he realized that maybe he didn't just love Rian like that. Maybe it had always been more, whether he realized it or not.

"I think... I think I love you too."

Rian studied him.

"How do you mean? Like like a friend? A brother? Or like, love me?"

Alex took a breath.

"When I found out that you're color blind, all I could think about was how you deserve every shade and hue of every color, and all I wanted to do was give that to you. Maybe I'm crazy but you're very special to me and I love you."

It felt good to say the words out loud, but the anxious feeling is his gut wasn't so great. It was official. He was going to move out of their apartment. He was quitting the band. He was running away to Canada that night. This was the end of his life. He-

"I love you too."

"What did you say?"

"I love you too, Alex. How could I not love you right now?"

"I..."

"And it's not just because you gave me these. Maybe this is just what made me realize it."

Rian took Alex's hand. This was weird. Good weird.

"So... what are you saying, exactly?" Alex asked. Even if Rian loved him now, it didn't mean it would last. It didn't even mean he was in love with him. Why did everything have to be so confusing?

Rian took off the glasses so Alex could see his eyes.

"I'm saying that I'm so happy right now that I could kiss you."

Alex smiled.

"So do it."

And that's what he did. Sure, they had kissed before, but not like this. This took away any doubt in Alex's mind that this was just a heat of the moment thing, or something they'd laugh about next week. This was real and it was happening, and it scared the shit out of Alex, but thrilled him at the same time.

"As much as I want to kiss you," Rian said finally, "there's a lot I still need to see."

They spent the rest of the day looking at pictures, watching videos of their band's shows (Rian couldn't believe the lights and called Jeff just to tell him what a great lighting designer he is, which lead to a whole lot of explanation and everyone freaking out just a little bit), and then more of just walking around their house exclaiming about things like toothbrushes and cereal boxes and window cleaner.

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By the end of the day, they were both exhausted. They laid in Rian's bed, with Alex's head resting on Rian's chest and Rian still staring at his hair, playing with it absentmindedly.

"I can't wait until we have to fly somewhere," Rian said.

"I'm sure the view will be a lot better in color," Alex replied sleepily.

"Everything is better in color."

Alex hummed and relished the feeling of being so close to Rian. It felt nice.

"I don't think I ever really thanked you," Rian said after a minute.

"Yes you did."

"No, not properly."

Alex sat up and looked at him with a sleepy smile.

"Well, you already kissed me."

"Alex, thank you."

"You're welcome."

"No, thank you."

Alex responded by kissing him again. This time, it was a little less weird and they were both a little more willing to let some more emotion show. Rian wrapped his arms around Alex and held him closer while Alex cupped his face with his hands.

"We should sleep now," Alex finally said. "You've got a lot to see tomorrow."

Alex kissed Rian one more time before reaching over to the bed table and turning off the lamp. Then he took off Rian's new glasses and set them down before snuggling back into Rian's arms. He sighed contentedly. He could get used to this. And Rian should get used to seeing color.

"Thank you again."

"Shut up."