Family Goals

**Oct. 28th, 2015 Alex’s POV**

It just wasn’t fair! I didn’t want to go to school today! I want to stay home with mama! I hated Auntie Jayne! I tried hard to slam the door to my room but I couldn’t and that made me even madder! I slammed myself against it and it closed with force. There, now she can’t make me go.

I wanted to throw things and let myself be angry but I couldn’t think of what to throw first. Instead I sat down in the middle of my room, back to the door, and fumed. This wasn’t fair! I wanted Mama not Auntie Jayne! It wasn’t nice that Mama was sick.

Papa was away, Mama was tired or sick all day. I just wanted them to pay attention to me! Then I got an idea, I would sneak in and see if I could cuddle with her. I crawled over to my door and opened it just a crack. The coast was clear. I made my way down the hall, listening hard for Auntie Jayne. She was downstairs on the phone.

Eureka! Mama’s door was open! I snuck closer and put my ear to the door. I heard the radio was on. Mama liked to listen to it when she was feeling bad, soft music so it would keep her company. I pushed the door further open and looked in. She was sitting up too! I snuck across the floor as quietly as I could. I then pulled myself up onto the bed carefully so _I_ wouldn’t make her sick.

“Alex? What are you doing in here?” My head sank, don’t send me away Mama. I was surprised to be pulled to her side. “I heard you and Auntie arguing. What was all that about?”

I nestled my head in her side and sighed heavily. “I wanna stay with you Mama. I don’t wanna go to school.” I threw my arms around her and held on tight.

I felt her kiss the top of my head. “Ma Loture, you love school. This isn’t like you.”

I sighed. “I don’t like Auntie Jayne. Doesn’t send the right lunch, bad snacks, I hate it!”

Mama pulled me into her lap. “You miss spending time with me don’t you?” I nodded, fighting back crying. “I miss you too Alex. I don’t like not feeling good anymore than you like it.”

Just then Auntie Jayne came in. I turned away from seeing her. “Here he is. Come on now Alex it’s time to go to school.” I held on tighter to Mama.

She rubbed my back. “I think Alex needs a sick day. Do you have a problem with him going with us to see Dr. T?” I hoped and prayed, I needed some Mama time!

Auntie Jayne sighed and sat in the chair. “You’re the one who said you wanted his routine to stay as similar as possible, but honestly no I don’t. I suppose you heard our argument too.”

“He’s not quite 3 Auntie, he can’t be good _all_ the time. I think this might be a case of needing time and attention. Kris has been feeling it too but he’s on the road right now.” Mama lifted my chin to see her face. “Would you like to go to the doctor’s with us and maybe hear the baby’s heartbeat?” Oh boy would I! She picked up the phone and dialed a number. “Good morning. I’m calling to tell you that Alex Letang has a case of much needed mommy time.”

I couldn’t hear who she was talking to but she was smiling. That was a good sign wasn’t it? “Yes, he should be ok tomorrow. Oh, sounds good.” There was a pause. “Good Morning Ms. Emily. No Alex won’t be coming today.” Ms. Emily, she was my teacher! “Yes, it has a lot to do with my pregnancy. He’s feeling missed and needs mommy time. No, today should be good. He should be back tomorrow with something to share, I have a Doctor’s appointment today. I’m sure he will miss you too, it’s been a rough month and won’t get easier for a while. We’ll work on that if we get time. Thank you so much for understanding. Have a good day.” She hung up and kissed my forehead. “Ms. Emily says you need to work on your colors and that she will miss you.”

Auntie Jayne sighed. “Are you sure Kallie? What if he acts up or you need something in a hurry?”

Mama sighed heavily. “I need this as much as he does. I’ve been feeling so down and sick. I’ve missed my Alex time. I think with the Zofran pump and the Reglan, not to mention everything else I’m taking to feel semi-normal, that we’ve forgotten that this is supposed to be an exciting time. It’s not every day you get to hear the heartbeat of your baby brother or sister for the first time.”

I got sent back to my room to play while Mama got ready to go to the appointment. Mama even said that if I was good and she felt good we might go to lunch after. I kissed Mama and happily went to my room.

**Kallie’s POV**

When Alex came into my room after that fight with Auntie Jayne I had a feeling I knew why. I’d been so sick in the last month I’d hardly been able to get out of bed. I hadn’t had any time to spend with him just the two of us and I know at least I missed it. Once we sent him back to his room I sighed. “Auntie Jayne I’m so sorry he yelled at you.”

She waved a hand. “Oh please it’s as much my fault as his. I do think he owes me an apology for saying he hates me and running off, but I owe him one for not hearing him when he was trying to tell me what he needed.”

I sighed. “I agree but why don’t we ask for that when he feels a bit better about his place. He’s missed me and I’ve missed him.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know how you do it without help normally. He’s so energetic. I have no idea how to help him.” I was slowly taking off my nightgown to get into the shower.

I chuckled. “Honestly I think what helps the most is something I can’t do right now, getting out and letting him run it out. We used to take daily walks with him on his balance bike. That and his routine normally helps.”

“Routine?” She sounded confused.

I called for Alex, who came thumping back in quickly. “Has Auntie Jayne not seen your morning and evening routine charts?” He hung his head and shook it. That explained a lot of why he said what he did. “Go pull them down and bring them here so I can explain them to her.”

He went running back out. “He has morning and evening charts?” She said.

I nodded. “It helps him be ready to go to school and go to bed. I’m a little surprised Kris didn’t tell you about them. They’ve helped so much.” Alex came back in proudly carrying his charts. “Thank you Alex. These are his morning and evening routine charts. They’re made from colored manilla file folders that we cut tabs on. Each tab is a separate thing he needs to do before he can be ready for either the day or going to bed.“ I handed the evening one to Auntie Jayne. “This one is for going to bed, we found that giving him a bit of responsibility and independence makes him feel better about how and what he’s doing.”

“Why does he need those things? He’s 3, or almost.”

It was clear to me that she needed a bit more of a demonstration. “Alex, did you make your bed today?” He nodded. “It’s not marked.” His eyes got wide and he closed the tab quickly.

“I did it mama, weallwy. I didn’t getted my vitamin though.” I couldn’t help up grin. I leaned over carefully and got the bottle I had of gummy vitamins that Alex took. There were more than a few days that’s they were the only vitamin I could take. “Yay gummy!” He picked one and popped it in his mouth. He then happily closed the vitamin flap.

“Go get your calendar Alex so we can show Auntie how we use it too. Don’t forget your pack of event cards.” He grinned at me and carefully made his way off the bed. Jayne watched him go with her jaw dropping. “He loves that he knows what’s next in his routine.”

She was still gaping. “I have _never_ seen a child who loved something like that.” I smiled and heard the alarm going off on my tablet, time for more Reglan. I grabbed it and the lime water I could keep down and took it carefully, then reset the alarm.

Alex was looking at me with his head cocked from the doorway, he had run up and down the stairs. “Mama, taking what?”

“It helps keep Mama from throwing up.” He nodded and came over carrying his calendar. “Here, let’s plan the week.” I put the cards spread out and started with today. “Today is Wednesday so we won’t do Monday or Tuesday. Let’s see, no school but we do have a doctor’s appointment.” I placed that on the first of 3 velcro dots I had used on it. Morning, noon and night events for the day for the entire week.

Aunt Jayne added. “Don’t forget lunch.” I nodded.

Alex found the lunch out card and I put it in the second slot. “Papa game.” He handed me the card that said Pens Game and I put it on the third one for tonight. We did the same for the rest of the week, including Mama/Alex time on Saturday.

The phone rang and I picked it up. “Hello?”

“Kallie, how are you?” It was Vero.

“I’m feeling somewhat better. I have an appointment today so I hope to get good news. Oh and Alex is having some serious Mama withdrawal and is coming with us today.” I could hear Scarlett and Estelle in the background.

“Oh was he still going to school?” I hummed in affirmative. “Would Alex be free for a play date tonight for the game? Estelle has been missing him.”

I chuckled. “Would you be willing to come over? I can watch by listening mostly but that way we could spend time together too.” Alex was hanging on every word of mine. It was clear that it wasn’t just me he’d been missing.

Vero laughed. “I would love that. Just us though, so we do not strain you.” I moved the Pens Game card over and attached the Play Date next to it. Alex grinned broadly. Vero asked what she could bring to add to dinner, something we did when we jointly watched the game shared making dinner. I told her I’d love some of her teriyaki chicken strips, but cold not hot. Laughing she told me I was a mind reader. “I already have them marinating, going to cook them up during rest time.” We made quick and easy plans for sides and then said goodbye.

I had Alex got get his backpack and add things to do to it for when/if he became bored at the doctor’s office. He brought it to me with his new books, all about pregnancy and bring a new big brother. He then added his water bottle which had ice cold lime water in it. He even made my bottle up with electrolyte cubes and lime water. I don’t know how he knew to do this but it was about the only way I could keep the electrolytes down.

I gave myself a sink wash as I ran out of time for a full shower before my appointment. I then slipped on the Cantaloop Empire Waist Tank I had been gifted with from Kris’ last road trip. I added my current favorite charcoal maternity leggings, a teal open cardigan and my favorite teal ballet flats to complete to the look.

After checking in at Dr. T’s I went and was able to actually pee in the cup. You don’t know how happy that made me. Amy, the nurse for today, took me back into the room and checked the rest of my vitals. “Alright, Dr. Rebecca will be in shortly.”

Alex was standing close to the table I was on. “Mama?” I looked at him. “Hear the baby?”

I rubbed his shoulder. “We will. The doctor will have a special machine to hear the heartbeat.”

Just then the door opened. “I sure do. Hello Alex, nice to see you again.” He flushed and mumbled something inoffensive.

I sighed. “Don’t mind him, it’s been a rough month and he needed some special time.” She just nodded. “As for me, I feel semi-human.”

That led into the appointment. We asked and answered all sorts of questions, mostly over Alex’s head so that made him ask questions to understand. When those were done and we were caught up Dr. T stood up and picked up the fetal heart monitor. “Alex, would you like to hear the baby’s heart?” He nodded quickly and she grinned. “Ok, let’s find it.” I moved my top and she began searching. Finally, closer to my hip than my belly button, she found it. A soft rapid whooshing that made me smile. “There it is.” She moved the transducer to get a better signal as it seemed the baby had moved. “Yep a nice steady 130 beats per minute. A little lower than I expected but still it’s strong and that’s what matters.”

I got out my phone and recorded the heartbeat for Kris and sent it to him. It would be a nice surprise. “Now I want to ask if you want to check for anything abnormal, specifically this check predicts Down’s Syndrome.”

That term frightened me and I stilled. “What do you think my odds would be?”

She sighed. “Honestly I don’t know. I’d say they are pretty good but with your HG, I’d like to check to be sure.” I agreed and we went into the ultrasound room. I got up on the table and moved my clothes how they needed to be. “Alex, how would you like to see the baby a little bit?”

He leaned over and peered at my belly. “How see? Mama’s tummy had no window.” We all chuckled, it felt good to laugh.

Dr. T gooped me up and brought out the wand. “This will help see the baby like we heard it’s heartbeat.” She started near where she’d heard the heart. “Oh there it is.” On the screen was the classic black and white image of our baby. She did a quick measurement and a calculation. “Let’s look at it’s neck.” She moved a bit for a better look. She froze the image. “Ok, let me explain this. See this area here?” She was pointing to the back of the neck. “This is what I’m looking at. To see if this area has the right area in it for the gestational age. Between that and the blood work, it’ll tell me what your chances are of having an issue. I do have to say that this look really good though.”

Alex had to go potty then, so Aunt Jayne made sure he knew where it was. Dr. T then sighed. “I think my prediction might be wrong about your baby. It might not be a girl after all. I’m seeing the placenta on the right side here whereas before we found it on the left.”

I groaned. “Oh great, so be prepared for anything just in case?” She nodded. “Good thing I hadn’t done much registering yet. I was going to talk to my friend tonight about what we might need.”

“Probably a good idea. I just thought I’d give you a heads up just in case. I wouldn’t worry about it but just so you aren’t completely surprised if it’s not what you were expecting when the time comes.” She checked how big I was. “Huh, this is a week ahead. Either you’re retaining fluid or I’m measuring wrong. It’s been an off day so far for me. We lost one overnight.”

I sighed sadly. That could easily be me. “I’m sorry. I’m hoping that won’t be me.”

She chuckled. “Me too. The pump is working well for you though right?” I nodded furiously.

“Oh yeah, it’s not fun when I have to change it, reminds me it could be _so_ much worse. I’ve got an alarm set on my tablet to remind me to take my Reglan every 6 hours. It even wakes me up overnight.” I’d tried going without the overnight dose a couple times and paid the price in _way_ worse symptoms until the dose kicked in. “My aunt has said that mine is worse than hers ever got but not as bad as my mom’s was.”

“We won’t let it get that bad. You will survive this.” Dr. T was as determined as I was.

“Speaking of, Kris and I have discussed it. This is going to be my only pregnancy. If we want more kids after, we’ll adopt.” She nodded and made a note in my chart.

From there it was checking out and making sure the next appointment was set, it was. As usual I got the reminder to call if I needed anything, day or night.

We then went for lunch, Subway. It was pretty neutral as far as smells go and I could stand to eat in there. Would it have been better to go home and have lunch? Probably but that wasn’t the point.

I felt good enough to think about staying out for a trip to USA Baby in Ross Township. Once there we took it slow. Alex loved coming here so he was happy. “Alex, we’re looking for things for the baby but if you see something you like we can talk about it.” He nodded and moved for the baby stuff. Hearing the heartbeat and seeing his little sibling really has improved his mood.

I looked for going home outfits and decided on Aden and Anais outfits. I easily found some kimono style onesies and sleepers and found matching hoodie. Then I looked for two colors just to be safe from what Dr. T said. Then I saw the dream blankets. They were so soft! I took a picture of the Up, Up and Away one and sent it to Kris with the caption, Dream Blanket for Alex maybe for his birthday?

Soon I got an answer. ‘Sounds like a good idea, what about the baby?’ I FaceTimed him quickly. “There might be an issue about that.” He was of course surprised. “Dr. T said today that we should be prepared for anything.”

“Find a pattern for both a boy and a girl and get them. We should find a color scheme that will work for either.” I found two patterns of easy swaddles that I liked and showed him. “Bon, get those.”

I smiled. “Sounds good, what about having a single color that are in both schemes and then making it more tailored for each sex?” I moved and found an aqua pillow. “We could dress this up for a boy or a girl.”

Kris smiled. “We can talk about it tomorrow, I need to nap.” We sent each other kisses and I let him go. I then found matching items for the patterns I liked and put them in the basket. They had dream blankets too so I got all three.

Alex found the Honest Company section and called me over. “Mama! Diapers and Wipes!” I came over and smiled. He loved the wipes we still used when we were out. “Get some for the baby?”

I had him pick two patterns in the newborn size and we added those to the basket I had. I then found and added 2 color of breathable bumpers. I could use both the grey and the white for either sex.

I was starting to feel like I had done too much. Aunt Jayne and I decided it was time to go home before I got too bad. Alex, however, was very happy and didn’t mind going home.

That night we had the Fleury gals over and watched the guys trounce the Caps. I also got some good advice about what we might need or want. When the kids were occupied I told her about the doctor saying it might be a boy, not a girl like she has said earlier and we should be prepared for anything to be safe. She giggled and then we talked about what colors would go well with aqua for both a boy and a girl.

In bed that night, waiting for Kris to come home, I looked over how the day had gone. I had gotten Alex to apologize for his tantrum which Auntie apologized for not listening as well so all was right there again. The appointment had been exciting and enlightening. Even the trip to USA Baby had been good. I fell asleep waiting and with a smile on my face.