My Dearest Love.

She was a Winchester. Carrying a family name like that meant many things, and one of those happened to be her familiarity with death. She, herself, had been on death’s door on several different occasions, however it was her familiarity with loss that she constantly carried with her. Loss and death went in hand-in-hand, a fact that she knew all too well, but his name was never supposed to make it onto that list. A mental list she’d started when she was very young of all of the people she’d lost over the years.

He was never supposed to end up on that list.

He claimed he was a survivor, and survivors didn’t die, but a survivor he was no more. He’d left her just like everyone else had. She felt as though eternal damnation would be better than this, however with him gone it seemed she’d already found it. Some might say she should have seen this all coming and quit while she was ahead. After all, the mental list of people she’d lost over the years wasn’t exactly a short one. Both of her parents. Jo. Ellen. Bobby. Hell, she’d lost count of how many times she’d lost both of her brothers. So, maybe she should have seen this coming. Maybe she should have realized that his claim of being a survivor would be total bullshit, but she hadn’t, and now she was paying the price.

He’d made a promise to her.

She’d made a promise to herself many years ago to always keep those walls up that she’d built. They served as her armor, her protection from loss and death. Those walls began to crumble the second she locked eyes with the devilishly handsome pirate. It took her a few weeks to admit to herself that she was falling for him, a few months to realize that she loved him, and year after their first meeting she lost him. Just like she lost everyone else.

She wasn’t supposed to lose him.