Status: Active
Sex and Donuts
Hipster Hot Dog
The second the door opened to this unknown bakery the smell of coffee filled my nose. One cup is never enough for me, caffeine is an all day thing, it's a necessity for survival. So if they have coffee, I'll have to help myself.
As I stepped food inside, I walked by a table that had all the sugar and cream you would need. The table was fit against the wall of one side of a short hallway. The hallway turned at the end to reveal a little counter. It had a long glass vitrine of different pastries, with more on wire racks in the back. Past the vitrine there were little elevated centerpieces that had cookies of different sorts arranged in a circle.
The further my eyes went the more impressed I became, I finally reached the cashier after looking over the tea boxes they had displayed. It was a young man, probably in his early 20's, he wore a little green apron to cover up a button up shirt that had a strange pattern and slim cut tan jeans. I stood in front of him trying to study his shirt, What the hell kind of pattern is it?
"You're wondering about my shirt, aren't you?" he finally asked me.
"Uhhh, yeah." I said, my eyes finally traveled to his face to study his features.
"If you look closely they're a bunch of hotdogs against each other, my mother made it." he paused," I probably shouldn't have said that, made me sound like a mama's boy."
"Why hot dogs?" I couldn't help but ask him, don't say you're gay, don't say homosexual tendencies.
"I enter into a hot dog eating contest every year, only won a few times," he said with a sharp inhale through his teeth. He has very straight teeth, they almost look fake how straight and white they are like chicklets.
I narrowed my eyes to take in his facial features better, because you know it always helps to narrow your eyes. His eyes are a green blue, very unique but they complement his olive skin tone very nicely. His hair was a deep brown, little long for my tastes but he had it tastefully pushed back with some sort of product. He is really handsome, at least until my eyes fall down to his patchy beard. Hipsters, the lot of them. It wasn't until my eyes fell down to his lips that I realized that they were moving.
"-ffee?" the only part of a word that I caught.
"What?" I asked," sorry, I was looking at your patchy beard and lost myself in the bald spots." I accidentally blurted out.
"Thanks.......do you want some coffee?" he repeated.
"Well....." I narrowed my eyes to his name badge, I could at least learn his name before I insult his face," Weldon." Hipster parents.," I'll have 12 ounce drip coffee."
"Okay, that'll be $1.39." he said as he pulled a cup and then turned around to fill it up. I handed him exact change then dropped whatever pennies I had left over into the cup. He handed me the cup, I was about to walk away until he said," your hips are so wide I'm surprised it hasn't sucked a baby into them." I was so shocked I just kept walking.
The minute I walked out of the bakery, I opened my phone and pulled up Anna. I vigorously started texting, Some hipster ass-face at the bakery I tried said my hips are so large a baby is going to burrow inside of them. Sent.
What a huge asshole, that's not where I'm going next time I want a donut....I didn't even try their pastries!
As I stepped food inside, I walked by a table that had all the sugar and cream you would need. The table was fit against the wall of one side of a short hallway. The hallway turned at the end to reveal a little counter. It had a long glass vitrine of different pastries, with more on wire racks in the back. Past the vitrine there were little elevated centerpieces that had cookies of different sorts arranged in a circle.
The further my eyes went the more impressed I became, I finally reached the cashier after looking over the tea boxes they had displayed. It was a young man, probably in his early 20's, he wore a little green apron to cover up a button up shirt that had a strange pattern and slim cut tan jeans. I stood in front of him trying to study his shirt, What the hell kind of pattern is it?
"You're wondering about my shirt, aren't you?" he finally asked me.
"Uhhh, yeah." I said, my eyes finally traveled to his face to study his features.
"If you look closely they're a bunch of hotdogs against each other, my mother made it." he paused," I probably shouldn't have said that, made me sound like a mama's boy."
"Why hot dogs?" I couldn't help but ask him, don't say you're gay, don't say homosexual tendencies.
"I enter into a hot dog eating contest every year, only won a few times," he said with a sharp inhale through his teeth. He has very straight teeth, they almost look fake how straight and white they are like chicklets.
I narrowed my eyes to take in his facial features better, because you know it always helps to narrow your eyes. His eyes are a green blue, very unique but they complement his olive skin tone very nicely. His hair was a deep brown, little long for my tastes but he had it tastefully pushed back with some sort of product. He is really handsome, at least until my eyes fall down to his patchy beard. Hipsters, the lot of them. It wasn't until my eyes fell down to his lips that I realized that they were moving.
"-ffee?" the only part of a word that I caught.
"What?" I asked," sorry, I was looking at your patchy beard and lost myself in the bald spots." I accidentally blurted out.
"Thanks.......do you want some coffee?" he repeated.
"Well....." I narrowed my eyes to his name badge, I could at least learn his name before I insult his face," Weldon." Hipster parents.," I'll have 12 ounce drip coffee."
"Okay, that'll be $1.39." he said as he pulled a cup and then turned around to fill it up. I handed him exact change then dropped whatever pennies I had left over into the cup. He handed me the cup, I was about to walk away until he said," your hips are so wide I'm surprised it hasn't sucked a baby into them." I was so shocked I just kept walking.
The minute I walked out of the bakery, I opened my phone and pulled up Anna. I vigorously started texting, Some hipster ass-face at the bakery I tried said my hips are so large a baby is going to burrow inside of them. Sent.
What a huge asshole, that's not where I'm going next time I want a donut....I didn't even try their pastries!