Status: Complete
Fall
1/1
Where is the bright eyed big dreamer of yesteryear?
Somewhere along the way she got lost. She gave you everything she had, every little piece of her, and it wasn't enough. She wanted so desperately to make you happy, to be good enough for you, that she stopped being herself.
She was brash, unfiltered, always offering her own brutally honest opinion. She became quiet, censored, afraid to speak her mind because surely that would start a fight. She was fiercely independent, she didn't need anyone to complete her. You needed her to need you, to be totally dependent on you, and so she clung to you like a frightened child to it's mother. She became everything you wanted her to be; everything she wasn't. It still wasn't enough. You were never happy but she never stopped trying. She gave until she had nothing left give and you still weren't happy.
She wasn't happy either. She realized that one cool Fall morning as she stared into the bathroom mirror wondering who that broken little girl was, the one that peered back at her with a defeated expression in her bloodshot blue eyes.
She left that night; blew away with the Autumn breeze. Though her heart felt as broken as the leaves that crunched beneath her sneakers, she smiled. It wasn't a mask put on to fool friends, it wasn't manufactured for your sake, for the first time in five and a half years it was real.
Somewhere along the way she got lost. She gave you everything she had, every little piece of her, and it wasn't enough. She wanted so desperately to make you happy, to be good enough for you, that she stopped being herself.
She was brash, unfiltered, always offering her own brutally honest opinion. She became quiet, censored, afraid to speak her mind because surely that would start a fight. She was fiercely independent, she didn't need anyone to complete her. You needed her to need you, to be totally dependent on you, and so she clung to you like a frightened child to it's mother. She became everything you wanted her to be; everything she wasn't. It still wasn't enough. You were never happy but she never stopped trying. She gave until she had nothing left give and you still weren't happy.
She wasn't happy either. She realized that one cool Fall morning as she stared into the bathroom mirror wondering who that broken little girl was, the one that peered back at her with a defeated expression in her bloodshot blue eyes.
She left that night; blew away with the Autumn breeze. Though her heart felt as broken as the leaves that crunched beneath her sneakers, she smiled. It wasn't a mask put on to fool friends, it wasn't manufactured for your sake, for the first time in five and a half years it was real.
♠ ♠ ♠
This probably isn't very good. It sort of wrote itself. I guess I just needed to put it out there. The 'she' is me in case you didn't get that, and I really did lose myself for a guy for who wasn't worth it in the least. I'm in the process of finding myself again and writing helps. That being said, maybe I'll update Weakness soon. Like, after I finish my homework. College sucks in that respect.