Makeshift Love

The air was crisp; there was tension in the air that spoke of the coming storm. There was a comical parallel to Avery’s life. Avery smiled a genuine smile for the first time in a long time. She had been hiding behind false promises and barely-believable lies. It was a long time coming.

She sat in the gravel, not minding the small friction it caused. A streak of light graced the sky and Avery knew that the storm wouldn’t be too long. Avery soon became lost in her thoughts, and enjoyed every moment of the quiet.

“Ava,” her eyes snapped open and she flinched. Soft laughter followed. “Sorry, I didn’t know I’d scare you. Just wanted to let you know we should go before the storm hits.”

Avery sighed and nodded. She had forgotten that Brian was on his way. After standing she brushed some of the excess dirt from her legs. Brian had already turned toward the parked cars, and Avery knew that it was only a matter of time before she had to answer questions.

Surprisingly Brian kept quiet during the ride. Avery was almost afraid to break the silence. Soon they were pulling into Brian’s driveway.

“I don’t want to pressure you. Just know that I’m here whenever you’re ready to talk.” Avery kept her mouth shut tight. Brian sighed and killed the engine.

It took two hours before the phone rang. Brian answered it and immediately began to lie. Avery didn’t have to eavesdrop to know who was calling.

The first time Avery sought Brian for solace she was thirteen. They had met by chance; Brian was a friend of Avery’s brother, Trent. Trent, like every other older brother, had no patience for his younger sister and mocked her mercilessly. Brian was the voice of reason – and sometimes her defense.

It was no secret that Trent and Brian lost their friendship over Avery. She wasn’t sure of the details – there were many rumors. Trent moved on in his life, and grew up to be one of Avery’s best friends. Still, the relationship with Brian never left her mind.

It was that reason that brought Avery to contact Brian. She knew that it could potentially backfire. But Brian had become her haven, and had been for the prior four years.

The phone was replaced. Avery heard the receiver being replaced. A sad smile crossed her face as a memory came to the forefront of her thoughts.

---

“Ma, I’m not calling again. This is the fifth time. So what do you want me to say?” Muffled words came before Avery spoke again. “Mom wanted you to know that she misses you. And – what else mom?” More muffled words came.
“Whatever, talk to Brian, okay?”

Trent was less than kind. It wasn’t Avery’s idea to call repeatedly. She was merely a middleman. Avery was distracted by her mother’s words and didn’t hear the phone exchanging hands.

“Mom hopes that you guys are having fun. She said that I’ll be coming to Nana and Papaw’s right after this last doctor appointment and we’ll spend the whole summer together. Well, I’m hanging up now. So, goodnight and I love you.”
“G’night,” Brian answered, already half asleep. He had put the receiver to his ear after it hit his stomach. “Love you too Ava.”

Avery was mortified. She hadn’t meant to tell Brian she loved him – not that she didn’t love him. She thought that it was still her brother. After hanging up Avery carefully replaced the receiver and told her mother goodnight.

---

“Ava,” Brian was standing in front of her. “Are you okay?”
“Fine,” Avery cleared her throat. “I’m fine, just thinking about things.” She sighed before continuing. “I know that I need to talk about things, but I’m just not ready yet. Can we call it a night if I promise to talk tomorrow?”

Brian agreed. He would have let Avery leave without the promise of a discussion.

The night brought a heavy storm and heavier hearts. Avery didn’t sleep well. Brian was sweet enough to let her have his bed – he slept on the couch.

The morning was unforgiving. Avery was less than ready to face the day, let alone her problems. Intellectually she knew that running from her problems was no solution. But Avery wasn’t looking for a solution, at least not at the moment; she simply wanted to get away.

“Before we do this you have to promise not to interrupt me, okay?” Brian agreed.

Avery began her story. She recounted the fond memories of Brian and her brother. Soon her story transformed into one that she wasn’t sure she would finish.

“I guess… Well, I don’t know what I guess. Trent just doesn’t care about me – or anyone else. He’s so far into drugs that nobody else matters. And I want to help him so much, and all he does is get angry. Last night I couldn’t stay anymore, so I took off. And I know that he called you, and I’m sorry that you had to lie. But I need to go. Momma wouldn’t have wanted this for me – I know that she isn’t happy with what Trent’s doing, and I know that somewhere deep inside he knows that too. We’re all grieving Brian. I don’t know why he thinks he’s the only one entitled to be hurt.”

Brian nodded and didn’t ask any questions. He took Avery to the airport and asked if she was sure. Avery confirmed, knowing exactly what she was going to do. It would take everything she had, but Avery knew that she could make it on her own. She just needed a fresh start.

“Be safe.” Brian made Avery promise. He waited until her flight was ready to depart. “You’re gonna go far. One day we’ll get together again.”

After one last tight squeeze Brian let her go. Avery turned and walked toward the terminal, ready to let go of the past. With or without anyone by her side, she was taking the world on, and planning to win it over with a smile.