You Loved Me Once

“Remind me why you insist on taking us to that restaurant again?” Jess complained as she padded back into the foyer, her eyes glancing at Alba who walked ahead of her. It had been a rare treat, usually, Alba tended to keep herself to herself, but when she had invited Jess and a couple of other women out to lunch, the receptionist hadn’t been able to resist. She liked Alba, even if she could be a little difficult to talk to, and she was pleased that she felt as though she could talk to her, even if it was fleeting, Jess liked the idea of being someone that Alba could turn to.

“It’s my favourite” Alba mused, shrugging out of her jacket “Have you ever eaten any better French cuisine?” she fussed.

“I can’t pronounce their menu” Jess complained “And I am not the biggest fan of the food. Next time, I get to choose the restaurant” she added.

“So we will be getting a burger or something then?” Alba teased.

“We can’t all be bigshot food critics, Alba” Jess pointed out as she stepped back behind her desk “Besides, it wouldn’t do you any harm to eat something less fancy for a change. If you ever get a boyfriend, he’s going to spend all of his money trying to take you out to dinner” she teased with a grin.

Alba rolled her eyes. “If I ever get a boyfriend?” she posed “Are you trying to say it is not likely to happen?” she posed.

Jess shook her head. “I know you could get a boyfriend any time you want to, Alba, you’re a beautiful woman with a great personality, but given that I don’t think I’ve seen you go out anywhere to socialize in the 5 years we’ve worked together, I am not holding out hope” she explained softly. She didn’t want to offend Alba, but the idea of her finding a boyfriend did seem a little far off. She didn’t go out, she kept herself to herself, and it wasn’t exactly likely to find her a boyfriend if she kept it up.

Alba offered her a look before she sighed. “It’s complicated” she muttered.

“The flower sending idiot?” Jess posed.

Alba nodded. “I don’t want to go into detail, but I will tell you that it’s not easy. He and I…it’s got a lot of history and it left me a little reluctant to try and start something else” she explained gently “Gracias for coming to lunch with me, Jess” she added before she ducked back into her office, closing the door with a small thump before she turned to face her desk, her blue eyes widening a little.

“I didn’t know you went out to lunch” Lionel quipped.

Alba merely stared at him, something which made him shake his head. “What did you think would happen, Alba?” he posed quietly. It had been a spur of the moment decision, after his talk with Gerard a few days previous, he had spent a lot of time trying to figure out his next move, but when he had driven past Alba’s building, he hadn’t been able to resist going inside, even if he knew he would be less than welcome. Part of him was desperate just to see her.

“You broke into my office?” Alba squeaked.

“I didn’t break in” Lionel countered, shaking his head “I told them I had an appointment and that I would be happy to wait here until you got back” he added.

Alba shook her head. “I thought I was clear with you” she spluttered, trying to keep her voice down.

“And I thought I was with you” Lionel retorted “Alba, I am not just going to quit” he insisted.

“Why?” she posed “Why can’t you just take the hint and leave me alone?” she spat.

Lionel shrugged. “Because, as stupid as it is, I love you” he mumbled, the slightest of smiles pulling at the corner of his mouth.

Alba blinked. It had been a long time since he had said those three words to her.

“You can’t be surprised by that, Alba” Lionel mused, shaking his head a little “You’re my Alba, the girl I was always going to end up with, and even though I messed it up, I know that I still love you. I don’t think I’ve ever not” he explained softly.

Alba shook her head, taking in a breath. “Please, Lionel” she murmured as calmly as she could “Please, go away” she added. It had gotten to her, the way those three words had fallen out of his mouth so effortlessly, and she wanted him gone. She didn’t want to hear him say it again.

“I’m not just going to let go, Alba” Lionel murmured as he stepped towards her slightly.

“Why?” Alba posed “Lionel, I have been more than clear with you. Even if I thought I could still care for you, how could I let you get close to me again? How could I trust that you wouldn’t just hurt me all over again?” she pressed.

Lionel sighed.

“I am sorry” Alba murmured “But this” she mused with a gesture between the two of them “It’s over. I can’t trust you again, not after last time” she added.

“Alba” Lionel complained softly.

“What do you want from me?” Alba shot, her tone rising a little in frustration “I can’t be clearer than I am being right now” she added.

“I want one night” Lionel countered “One night where I am not your ex-boyfriend, but your childhood best friend, the person who made you smile when were children. I want you to be able to tell me that you don’t still love me” he insisted.

“I don’t” Alba countered, her stare fixed on her feet.

“I don’t believe you” Lionel mused.

“I don’t recall asking for your opinion” Alba spat.

Lionel quirked a little grin before he shook his head. “I want a night, Alba” he mused “One date” he added.

Alba shook her head. “Why would I give that to you?” she posed.

“Because if it doesn’t work out, I will leave you alone” Lionel offered.

Alba lifted an eyebrow, encouraging him to go on.

“I want you to be real with me for a night. No deliberate sabotage or anything like that, I want you to be you with me for a night and if we don’t have a spark, I will leave you alone and you can go back to pretending that I never happened. One night, Alba” he insisted softly.

Alba offered him a slightly unsure look, her hands messing with the hem of the blouse she wore.

“One night of your time, Alba, that’s all I want” he insisted, stepping a little closer to her “Please?” he added.

Alba peeked up at him for a second before she sighed. “If it doesn’t work, I have your word that you’ll leave me alone?” she posed.

“I promise you” Lionel agreed “And I have your word that you will actually try?” he pressed.

“I will try” Alba murmured “You have one night” she added.

Lionel grinned. “I will set it up. You’re free tomorrow night?” he posed.

“I am” Alba confirmed.

“Then I will see you then” he quipped before he darted out of the office.

Alba watched after him and shook her head, hoping that one night would be enough to prove to him that it simply wasn’t going to work.