Make You Feel My Love

For the next week, Paul and Tessa danced around each other like strangers living in the same house. He had left with the team on Monday for two games in Calgary and Edmonton and he had spent more time texting and talking to Katie than he had Tessa. There was a home game Saturday against Minnesota she was coming to and then Paul was back on the road for five games over ten days.

Before he knew it, it was Christmas and he found himself back at the little boutique looking for a Christmas present for Katie. Their weekly lunch had turned to twice a week when he was in town, and he stopped by her shop to pick up flowers every Monday.

It was a Wednesday, Christmas Eve eve, and he was meeting Katie in an hour for lunch when he entered the store. The girl behind the register recognized him.

"Mr. Martin, how can I help you today?"

"I need a Christmas present."

"Of course. Anything in mind?"

"Why don't you show me what you think." He knew she assumed he was buying for Tessa, and he knew she'd show him something that she was eyeing but he didn't care as she led him towards the jewelry. She pointed out a pair of earrings, a couple rings, another bracelet, and then some necklaces. He selected a couple of items, something for Tessa, and a pair of earrings for Katie, and followed the girl back to the register where she wrapped them and rang them up.

He got to the restaurant ten minutes early and got their usual booth in the back. He laid his phone on the tabletop and when it buzzed, he glanced down at it, sliding the phone unlocked to read the message from Tessa.

Is the Greek place any good? I see you waiting.

He looked behind him quickly, searching for her among the other diners. His heart thudded in his chest.

It's pretty good. Where are you?

I just walked past on my way to meet up with Sarah and saw you. I've been wanting to try there but haven't been able to convince her to go with me.

We should have dinner here sometime then.

That sounds good. I don't know how long Sarah and I will be but probably a couple hours. I'll see you at home later.

Okay. Have fun. I'll see you later.

I love you.

Paul felt the guilt creep in as he read the words again. He heard Katie greeting him and he sighed, locking the phone and putting it in his pocket, standing to hug her. She kissed his cheek before sliding into the booth.

"Merry Christmas," she grinned as their waiter set a water down for her.

"You got any big holiday plans?"

"I'm closing the shop for the rest of the week starting ten minutes ago. If I sleep for the next two days I won't feel bad about it."

Paul laughed and their waiter returned with food. Katie looked at him quizzically. "He asked if we wanted our usual; apparently we always order the same things."

"I appreciate that extra level of service; guess that makes us regulars."

"Guess so."

They talked over lunch about their holiday plans, Paul's upcoming games, and some of the more recent ones. After their plates were cleared, Paul handed her the small gift wrapped box he had gotten earlier.

"Merry Christmas, Katie," he smiled.

"Paul, you shouldn't have. I didn't get you anything."

"You're present enough."

She blushed under his watchful stare before peeling away the paper, holding the small box in her hand. She flipped the lid and gasped. "Paul, these are beautiful, thank you. How has no woman snatched you up?" She continued as she took off the earrings she wore and replaced them with the new ones.

Paul shrugged, a nervous movement. He had been talking to her for nearly a month and he still hadn't told Katie he was married, let alone mention the existence of his daughter. He couldn't explain why he had done it, why he had never mentioned to Tessa that he had randomly run into an old friend, why had had kept seeing her and talking to her without introducing her to his wife. It was bad, he recognized that, but it didn't stop him either.

"Seriously, Paul, thank you. They are amazing." She stood and slipped into his side of the booth, wrapping her arms around him. He reciprocated her hug and when his arms slid around him, Katie leaned into him and pressed her lips to his.

Paul found himself kissing her back, overwhelmed by old feelings, new feelings, and absolute crushing guilt. When they broke apart, she looked up at him.

"Sorry," she said softly.

"It's okay," he heard himself answer.

"I promised a friend I'd meet her to help with some last minute Christmas shopping so I gotta run. You play Wednesday next week; do you wanna lunch Tuesday or Thursday?"

"Thursday," he replied.

"Even though it's New Year's Eve? Don't you have plans?"

"Team party that night."

"Oh yeah, that's right; I'm doing the flowers for that."

Her words caught him off guard. "You are?"

"Yeah; do you remember I told you I had met a girl who'd be great to work at the shop?" Paul nodded. "Well, she didn't want to take the job because of her daughter and her husband's work but it turns out she knows some people and she and another girl came in a couple weeks ago to see if I wanted to do table arrangements and a few other display pieces. It ought to be really fun to create. And the pay is incredible. Anyway, I better run. I'll talk to you soon." She hugged him again quickly before disappearing out of the restaurant, leaving Paul alone in his thoughts.

He drove around aimlessly after paying, finally pulling in the driveway to his home a little after three. "Tessa?" He called out when he opened the unlocked front door. He walked upstairs to look for her and found her sitting near the window in their bedroom.

"I gotta go; I'll call you on Christmas with Ava," she said to the person on the other end of the phone, hurrying to end her call. She stood and swiped at her eyes, which is when Paul noticed they were red and rimmed with tears.

"What's wrong?" He immediately asked.

"Nothing, everything's great," she answered with a fake smile, brushing past him.

"Tessa!" He called out after her. She closed the bathroom door behind her and locked the door. "Tessa," he knocked. "Will you let me in please?"

"Go away."

"You never tell me to go away."

"You never not tell me that you love me too."

He stepped back from the door. He remembered her last text before he saw Katie and leaving it unanswered. "Tessie, I-"

"Just go away, Paul. Please," she said as her voice cracked.

He stared at the door, hearing Tessa sniffling on the other side. He stood there for several minutes until he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Seeing James' name, he exited the room to answer it.

"Hey, Nealer."

"What the fuck, Paulie!" James exploded. "What is going on there? Tess was in tears on the phone with Delilah just now."

"I..."

"Are you cheating on her?" He demanded.

"What? How could you ask me that? I love Tessa."

"Do you?"

"Of course I do."

"Then what was that fight about you had at thanksgiving?"

"She told you about that? Unbelievable..."

"She didn't, asshole. She talked to Delilah and I badgered her until she filled me in. She's insecure, man. You moved to California, the land of Baywatch."

"And? She's still the same woman I married. She's beautiful."

"But she didn’t feel it and you aren't helping. She told me that you two have barely spoken in weeks, let alone anything else."

"Why don't you butt out, James," Paul gritted out angrily. "It's not your fucking business or your fucking marriage."

"I won't butt out, because I love you guys. You're my best friends. You're family; I can't do nothing while you ignore your wife and your marriage crumbles around you."

"It's not crumbling."

"Bullshit. Did you notice that Tess cut her hair?"

"What?"

"Her hair, Paulie. She cut it, and colored it. Two weeks ago."

"She did?"

"Yeah. Open your eyes, man. Did you notice that she lost ten pounds? Because she has. Delilah called a friend who owns a studio down there; she's been taking classes, working on herself. She cut her hair, got a new outfit, and learned a hot little dance to surprise you with and you came home from the road and ignored her. Congratulations; you are officially worse than me. Get your fucking head out of your ass and quit whatever it is you are doing and win back your wife."

“I’m not doing anything,” he said sullenly.

“You know what, Paul? I don’t care. What I care about is Tessa’s happiness, and yours. So if you’re not happy with your wife, then let her go but don’t you dare drag it out because she doesn’t deserve that.”

“I don’t know where you think you get off telling me what to do but fuck off, Nealer.”

“Fuck you, Paul,” James snapped. “What is wrong with you? It’s Tessa.”

“Yeah, I know. And she’s my wife, not yours. You’re not in this relationship anymore so go to hell.”

“Wow,” James replied slowly. “Wow. I can’t believe this is you right now. I don’t know who you are and it’s no damn wonder that your wife thinks you’re sleeping around on her. You’re texting someone and acting suspicious, putting your phone away every time she walks into a room. You didn't notice she cut her hair, you haven’t asked her for sex in weeks. Your wife isn’t an idiot and before you lose her, you might want to take a step back and recognize what is going on.”

“I'm not cheating on her!” he yelled. “I’m not sleeping with anyone, here or on the road.”

“I’m serious, Paulie. If she calls Delilah one more time in tears, I am flying out there and bringing her and Ava to Nashville to stay with us. I promise you that. And while I’m there, I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“It’ll be fine, James. I’ll fix it.”

“You better. You won’t find anyone better than Tessa. Don’t forget that.”