Almost Is Never Enough

The house was quiet when my eyes opened. I half expected to hear Niklaus screaming about something, but it was almost like I was by myself. I threw the duvet from my legs, my feet hitting the hardwood floor. I pulled on a pair of sweats, making my way down the ridiculously long marble staircase. As I assumed, I was alone. All the rooms were empty. I busied myself in the kitchen, making pancakes and bacon. I was a bit surprised that there was food to begin with. We didn't actually need to eat, but old habits die hard.

"I was wondering when you were going to wake up." I whipped around, the handle broken off the wooden spoon pointed directly at the intruder's chest. I relaxed when I saw that it was only Elijah. I dropped the broken utensil into the trashcan before grabbing a plastic one and resuming my mixing.

"You probably shouldn't sneak up on me." I pulled a griddle from the cabinet, turning on the stove. I let it heat while placing the bacon in a frying pan.

"I doubt a wooden spoon would do much damage."

"That's not the point. Where's your brother?"

"Out, I presume." I glanced at him, eyebrows raised as he took a seat at the small table, donned in a neatly pressed suit. I should have known better, but I attempted to force myself to remember any small detail that I could. It was all blank, but I longed for my memories. I longed to know about the missing piece of my life, the people in it, the things I experienced.

"Do you ever wear normal clothes?" I asked, pouring batter onto the griddle in perfect circles.

"What do you mean?" He unbuttoned his jacket, draping it over the back of his chair. I watched him roll up his sleeves, his forearms flexing as he completed the task. Under normal circumstances, my heart would have beat itself out of my chest by now. But these weren't normal circumstances. I distracted myself, flipping the pancakes to the other side to finish cooking.

"I've never seen you wear anything other than a suit. Do you own a pair of jeans?"

"Never found much use for casual clothing."

"You should try it. You look uncomfortable," I commented, putting the finished pancakes onto a clean dish, "Are you hungry?"

"Not really, no." I shrugged, making myself a plate of food. I sat down across from him, keeping my eyes firmly on the table as I ate. The silence engulfed us as my thoughts drifted to the man sitting in front of me. I wondered how well I actually knew him, how well I knew all of the siblings, "Penny for your thoughts?"

"Did I love Kol?"

"You loved him the only way you knew how. You brought out the best in him. Kol was a....challenge, a lot of the time. You made him bearable." It sounded like he was a chore, and that bothered me. The idea of being a burden couldn't be pleasant for anyone.

"So, who exactly was I in love with? Normally when you bring out the best in someone, there's a relationship involved."

"Eager for information this morning." He gave me a small smile, but I didn't want to be distracted. I wanted answers.

"Was it Finn?" I hadn't heard much about this brother, save for his name being mentioned with a rather negative adjective. Maybe there was a reason for it.

"No. You never got to meet Finn. He was daggered by the time we reached New Orleans." I felt my skin pale as a thought crossed my mind.

"Please don't tell me it was Niklaus. I don't think I can stomach that thought." It was hard enough to be around him now, and I'd only seen him for about twenty minutes the previous night. A chuckle left his lips as he shook his head at me.

"You and Niklaus were the true definition of siblings, always bickering like children. Love was the last thing on either of your minds in regards to the other." I let out a small sigh of relief, but then that only left one sibling. I looked up, my heart suddenly beating rapidly in my chest. I was sure he could hear it, but his expression betrayed nothing.

"Talking about me in my absence? I do hope it's all good things." Niklaus stepped into the kitchen, two human girls and a boy trailing behind him. I figured they were supposed to be "breakfast" from the dazed look in their eyes.

"I'm not sure there's anything good to say about you. How's about giving me back my memories now? There's years of information I'm dying to know."

"All in good time, darling. I brought you a present, and I see you've made food. Perfect. Eat up. You'll need your strength for tonight." I didn't like the smirk that was on his face. Niklaus seemed to be the devil's reincarnate, and I wasn't up for any games.

"I would say thank you, but it's not like I'm incapable of feeding myself. What's going on tonight?"

"The Salvatore brothers will be joining us for dinner. If you know anything about the two of them, you know that we should be expecting a fight." As much as I wanted Damon dead, I couldn't fight Stefan. He'd never wronged me, and I realized, unfortunately, that Damon was right. I was going to have to choose a side, but which one?

"Are you going to tell me what's in the coffin? Your father is dead, so what's left to be afraid of?"

"You keep asking questions, Athena, but I'm not entirely sure I can trust you. How do I know you won't run and tell Stefan everything once you leave?" When I glanced at Elijah, I could see the hesitation in his eyes as well. They didn't trust me, but who was I to trust them? I knew next to nothing about them, though Niklaus was at fault for that. We were at a crossroads.

"I trust Stefan because I know him. I know he has my best interests at heart. As for you? You took memories away from me, memories that would probably do a lot of good for me to have right now, Niklaus. You don't trust me, and I don't trust you. That could be fixed if you lifted the compulsion." I crossed my arms over my chest, abandoning the half eaten pancakes and bacon that sat on my plate.

"Now is not the time for that, and I'm afraid we're at an impasse. So why don't you have a little faith and trust me when I say you don't want what's in that coffin to be unleashed." He left the room before I could get another word out, dragging one of the girls with him. I huffed, dropping my head onto the table.

"I'm so glad he wasn't the one." I muttered for my ears only, but I knew Elijah heard me. I felt his hand on my shoulder, and my body instantly relaxed, almost like it was a natural reaction.

"I apologize for Niklaus' behavior."

"You shouldn't be the one apologizing. Your brother is an insufferable idiot." I sincerely hoped he was listening to me. I wanted to make myself scarce. Whatever this dinner was, I had no desire to be apart of it. I quickly finished my food, my earlier conversation with Elijah floating to the back of my brain. It had become painfully obvious that who I was in love with was the least of my worries. We had an unknown enemy, and I was stuck between two people who seemed to care equally about my safety.

"Still, I apologize. Would you like to go into town today? I'm sure you don't want to be holed up in this house."

"Yes. Just let me get dressed." I walked up the stairs, shutting myself in my room. I made quick work of showering and putting on a simple outfit. I was brushing through my hair when there was a knock on the door, "Come in." I stared into the vanity, running my fingers through my freshly detangled waves.

"It seems Elijah would like me to apologize for offending you." I was surprised by the sound of Niklaus' voice. I was more surprised at the words that left his mouth. I could tell he wasn't the type of person to say sorry very often, if at all. I turned, raising my eyebrows at him.

"My feelings are difficult to hurt, Niklaus. You haven't offended me, but I'm frustrated. I came to Mystic Falls for one reason and found myself in the middle of a war. I'm expected to choose sides, and I don't even know what's going on. Forgive me for being a bit grouchy," I snapped, pulling on a leather jacket and my boots.

"We're not the same people we were 200 years ago, Athena. Once you learn the truth, your opinion is going to change, but it's not all black and white." I rolled my eyes, taking a couple steps towards him.

"Let me tell you something. Damon told me that you're trying to turn Elena, and innocent girl from what I know, into a human blood bag. He's trying everything in his power to stop you, along with Stefan, and yet here I am, sharing what I do know with you. If that's not blind loyalty, then I don't know what is."

"And how long will this blind loyalty last?"

"It wouldn't be blind loyalty if you'd just give me back my memories. I assume we were close because you haven't killed me yet, and I'm sure you're not used to people defying you." I didn't have a submissive bone in my body. I'd always been headstrong, even before I was turned.

"Fair enough. I promise to give you back your memories when the time is right. For now, you're just going to have to trust me." I shook my head, pushing past him to leave the room. Elijah was waiting by the front door, and impassive expression on his face. He led me out to a car, opening the passenger door and closing it behind me once I was safely in the seat. The ride into town was quiet, my irritation apparent in the atmosphere.

"Are you up for sharing?" I asked, turning my body so that I was facing Elijah. He kept his eyes on the road, but I could see him considering my request.

"Depends on what you'd like me to share."

"Have you ever been in love?" He seemed so put together; a calm facade that never broke. I wondered if a woman ever caught his attention or messed with the perfection that is Elijah Mikaelson. Was he capable of loving someone?

"That's a hard question to answer."

"Not really. Either you were or you weren't." He stayed quiet for a long moment, and I feared that I'd upset him, but as soon as I opened my mouth to apologize, he spoke.

"I thought I was in love at one point in my life. She was beautiful, but there's a difference between loving someone and being in love with them." I knew there was a difference, though I hadn't experienced the emotion myself. Well, I had, but I had no memory of the feeling. I was lost on the thought of love. I'd never found someone that interested me enough to pursue a relationship, human or vampire.

"So you haven't been in love."

"I have." His tone turned sad, and I wanted to stop asking questions, but I was curious.

"What happened to her? Surely you didn't let her get away easily. Anyone that can break your composure should be kept around." I tried to make light of the situation, but for once, his expression was giving him away. He didn't want to talk about this.

"She wasn't mine to keep."

"Was she engaged or something?" I raised my eyebrows at the thought of Elijah falling in love with a woman that was getting married. It was almost comical. The noble man taking a bite of the forbidden fruit.

"No. In fact, I'm almost positive she was in love with me as well. However, things don't always work out the way we'd like them to." When he shut the car off, I knew this particular topic of discussion was over. I wasn't any closer to figuring him out, but I was happy that he opened up to me.

"This dinner with Damon and Stefan....do you think there's any way I can get out of attending. No offense, but I don't want to be in the middle of all of this. I don't want to be forced to choose sides. I can barely stand to be in the same room with your brother, but I'm not one for sharing secrets that aren't mine to tell. I'd like to be kept out of it."

"If Niklaus has his way, no one will be kept out of it. As for dinner, I'd prefer if you were in attendance, but I won't force you to stay if you truly wish to leave." I didn't want to be stuck in the middle, but where else was I supposed to go? This whole situation was an accident waiting to happen. Someone was going to get hurt, and I prayed to whatever god that was listening that it wasn't me.

"First sign of someone's head getting ripped off and I'm out of there," I warned, walking toward the building he parked in front of.