Halloween: Age 4

“Mommy?”

Alice looked up from tying her son’s shoes with a smile on her face. “Yeah sweetie? What is it?”

Little Eric started biting his lip as her tried to think about whether or not he should ask his question. He may be only four years old, but he was smart and observant. At least that’s what he always heard adults say about him. He wanted to ask if daddy was going to be here to take him trick or treating. However, he knew that anytime he brought up daddy his mommy would get this look on her face. The only thing he could think it was similar to was the look on his face when he stubbed his toe the other day. Except he can tell she’s trying really hard to hide it.

Alice ruffled Eric’s hair. “Come on web head! You can tell me what’s up.”

It was Halloween, and Eric really wanted to be Spider-Man months ago.

He frowned. “Mooom, stop it.” He attempted to fix his hair even though it would shortly be messed up by the Spider-Man mask he was going to wear tonight. He stopped trying to fix it. He started to bit his lip again. “Is there- Is there any chance that,” He could already see the happiness draining from her face. He should really stop, but he was still slightly hopeful. “Is there any chance that daddy is going to be here?”

“Eric we’ve talked about this.”

THey haven’t though. He never got a real explanation why his dad just packed up his things and left. All he got was a hug. His birthday party was last month, and he almost cried when everyone was singing happy birthday. The phone kept ringing all day, but according to his mom it was a telemarketer. Whatever a telemarketer was it made his mom angry every time they called.

“No we haven’t.”

“Please,” she pleaded. “Eric not today.”

“Why won’t you tell me why daddy left?” Eric yelled, gripping hard on to his mask.

Her eyes start to tear up causing Eric to start crying. He didn’t want to make his mom cry. “I’m sorry. I don’t care about daddy…” He reached out to grip onto her hand. “Can we go trick or treating now?”

Alice sniffed, “Do you have your mask and a bag?”

“I need a bag.”

“Well go grab a pillowcase from the hall.”

They went out that night and attempted to forget about all the crying the happened before they left. Normally they only went down one street, but tonight they went down three. Alice was hoping all the extra candy would get her and her son’s mind off her ex-husband, but it wasn’t working on her. How could she explain to her son that his father wants to be with another man? That she hasn’t allowed him to even talk to Eric for the last ten months. He called so many times on Eric’s birthday that she unplugged the phone by the time the cake was brought out. She still feels terrible about it.

She knew she was hurting her son, but she couldn’t get over her anger. Her husband and her best friend! Of all the things that could happen in the world her friend had to steal something so precious away from her.

By the end of the night, however, she thought that she should tell her son something about his father.

“Hey, web head. You ready to pack it in for the night?” All the lights were starting to turn off anyway.

Eric was dragging a pillowcase full of candy along the sidewalk. “Can we eat some candy before bed?” He asked with enthusiasm.

“We’ll see. Come on.” They walk back over to their own street, and Alice starts to inspect the three pieces of candy her son picked out. “Here ya go.” Eric was about to grab the candy from her hand when she snatched it back. “Nah uh. You have to promise me that you’re going to go to sleep right after you eat this. Okay?” He nodded excitedly as he snatched the candy.

Before long he was being tucked into bed, and before she could chicken out, Alice sat down on the edge of the bed. “Eric you remember what you were asking me earlier about daddy?” Eric slowly nodded his head. “Well you see your father did something bad. Something that…” She suddenly regrets even bringing this back up, but if she didn’t Eric would keep asking. “You see sometimes people fall out of love with other people, and fall in love with someone else.” That is really the only way she can explain it. “You understand?”

It took a few minutes for him to answer. “So he loves someone else?” Alice nodded, her lips pressed into a thin line. He frowned. “Okay. Good night mommy.”

Alice thought a weight would be lifted from her shoulders, but the weight felt heavier. She did it all wrong. She should have explained better than she did. “O-okay. Love you. Good night.”

With that she left, and Eric never brought up his dad.