Make Me Strong
Chapter Three
The plane landed in Houston a couple hours later, and the tight feeling in Jensen's chest came back. The tight feeling he felt right before he looked into Misha's eyes after waking up. What he wouldn't give for Misha to be sitting right next to him, rambling on about the last movie he watched or how some restaurant screwed up his order. Misha was a good talker sometimes. He was always able to keep Jensen's mind otherwise occupied.
Now that was gone, and for the first time in seven years, Jensen felt alone. It was then he realized he truly was alone, and he could no longer depend on his best friend.
When the passengers were allowed to unboard, Jensen stood up and almost walked into a young child, who appeared to be no more than maybe nine years old. "Hey, watch it!" she said, glaring up at Jensen as if he had purposely tried to walk into her. Looking away, he stepped around her and made his way off the plane, glad to be on solid ground again. Pulling out his phone and dialing Misha's number, he made his way inside to await his belongings.
Misha picked up on the fourth ring, sounding a tad tired. "Hello?" he said, causing absolute relief surge through Jensen in waves. "Jensen?"
"I'm here," Jensen said after a moment. "Just calling in to let you know I've landed safely. About to head out to a hotel and maybe grab a bite." Jensen then saw his belongings, and arranged his phone to be held by his shoulder long enough for him to grab them. "How's things back home?"
"Dull, per usual. Except more so because we're not tearing up the town anymore," Misha said, sounding almost dead inside. "Probably to the town's relief, too," he went on, letting out a strained laugh.
"Hey, Collins," Jensen said, walking out of the airport and into the hot Texas air, "cheer up. I know me leaving is screwing you up, but I'll be back in a few years. Promise."
"It's just weird. You had become a constant in my life. It was nice knowing you were there every time I looked up, like you being there made everything okay," Misha said, followed by the sound of a crinkling bag of something. "Now that's gone, and I am not quite sure where I'm at."
"Dude, go back to school, start working, and before you know it, we'll be back at causing trouble for the county. Cheer up, and in five years we'll have a drink. On me." Jensen could practically see Misha having issues with dealing with his departure. "Plus, this could all fail, and I could be home within a few months. You never know."
What scared Jensen was that that seemed to cheer Misha up a bit. He knew Misha wanted him to do well in life, but the fact that he also seemed to be almost happy at the thought of Jensen failing was a bit odd. "You won't fail," Misha said after a few minutes, causing Jensen to tense up again. "I'm gonna get off here. Mom's wanting to head out to dinner here shortly, so call me later. Remember that you're an hour behind." Misha didn't wait for a response, just hung up.
Jensen pulled his phone away from his ear and stared out it for a long moment, considering if he should call again and keep Misha on the line. Jensen knew the way Misha hung up was his way of not dealing with the pain of Jensen's leave, but it still bothered Jensen.
Slipping the phone into his pocket, Jensen hailed a cab. When it pulled up, Jensen stared at his reflection for a moment, seeing from his eyes that the happy-go-lucky person he used to be slip away from him, and hardness take its place.
Opening the door and sliding into the cab, he told the driver his destination and soon they were off, the airport getting farther behind them. Closing his eyes, Jensen did his best not to think of Misha, but he failed when a boy with blue eyes, an umbrella, and a smile brighter than the sun popped up behind his closed lids. The smile that made the rain seem like a far away thing.
Jensen jumped a bit when he felt a drop of something hit his hand. It was then he realized that he was crying. Angrily wiping the tears, he steeled himself, refusing to let his emotions go haywire and get the better of him. "Keep it together, Ackles," he whispered, tapping his cheeks and blinking a few times to keep his eyes clear.
For a brief moment he locked eyes with the driver. "Just drive. Ignore me." It was taking every fiber of Jensen's being to keep him from telling the driver to turn the car around and go back to the airport. Misha wasn't just his best friend, he was, in a way, Jensen's better half. Laying his head against the window, Jensen watched the Texan landscape pass in a blur, not really seeing anything.
Time Elapse
Arriving at the hotel, Jensen paid the cabby, and got out. Grabbing his things from the trunk, he hit the trunk letting the driver know he was good to go. He watched the driver ease into traffic and drive off, watching his last chance to head back home fall out of sight.
Forcing up a steel wall, Jensen made his way into the building before him and up to the desk. "Can I help you?" the woman said, the fakest smile on her face. Jensen freaked out a bit, but contained himself.
"I sure hope so," he said, pulling out his wallet and handing the woman -- whose name apparently was Maureen -- his ID. "I called about a room this morning. The name is Jensen Ackles." Looking between him and the ID in her hands, Maureen's smile got impossibly wider.
"Of course," she said, handing his ID back to him. She typed a few things into the computer before saying, "Ah, here you are. Room 407." Handing Jensen a key card, she told him how to get to his room and that if he needed anything, to call. Jensen thanked her and made his way to the elevator instead of the stairs, not wanting to be with his thoughts too long. Pressing the button for his floor, he relaxed a bit.
Hearing something hit between the doors, he jumped. "Holy shit!" he exclaimed, seeing a girl a couple years younger than him side in beside him.
"Sorry," she said, pushing the button for the floor above his. "I tried calling after you to hold the elevator."
"Ah, I'm sorry," he said, waving her apology away. "I'm a little out of it. Just moved here and my mind is a little frayed right now."
"Who was she?" the girl asked, causing Jensen to look at her in surprise. Before answering, he took a quick moment to think.
"No girlfriend," he said, after a while. "Just a close friend."
"Is that another way of saying 'I'm gay and I just left the man I loved more than anything'?" she said, smiling softly up at Jensen.
"Whoa, no," Jensen said, staring at her and thanking the gods that the elevator came to his floor. Without looking back, he stepped out, quickly making his way to the left, only to realize he was going the wrong way. Turning around, he started watching numbers.
He could have sworn he heard the girl giggle before the elevator closed.
Now that was gone, and for the first time in seven years, Jensen felt alone. It was then he realized he truly was alone, and he could no longer depend on his best friend.
When the passengers were allowed to unboard, Jensen stood up and almost walked into a young child, who appeared to be no more than maybe nine years old. "Hey, watch it!" she said, glaring up at Jensen as if he had purposely tried to walk into her. Looking away, he stepped around her and made his way off the plane, glad to be on solid ground again. Pulling out his phone and dialing Misha's number, he made his way inside to await his belongings.
Misha picked up on the fourth ring, sounding a tad tired. "Hello?" he said, causing absolute relief surge through Jensen in waves. "Jensen?"
"I'm here," Jensen said after a moment. "Just calling in to let you know I've landed safely. About to head out to a hotel and maybe grab a bite." Jensen then saw his belongings, and arranged his phone to be held by his shoulder long enough for him to grab them. "How's things back home?"
"Dull, per usual. Except more so because we're not tearing up the town anymore," Misha said, sounding almost dead inside. "Probably to the town's relief, too," he went on, letting out a strained laugh.
"Hey, Collins," Jensen said, walking out of the airport and into the hot Texas air, "cheer up. I know me leaving is screwing you up, but I'll be back in a few years. Promise."
"It's just weird. You had become a constant in my life. It was nice knowing you were there every time I looked up, like you being there made everything okay," Misha said, followed by the sound of a crinkling bag of something. "Now that's gone, and I am not quite sure where I'm at."
"Dude, go back to school, start working, and before you know it, we'll be back at causing trouble for the county. Cheer up, and in five years we'll have a drink. On me." Jensen could practically see Misha having issues with dealing with his departure. "Plus, this could all fail, and I could be home within a few months. You never know."
What scared Jensen was that that seemed to cheer Misha up a bit. He knew Misha wanted him to do well in life, but the fact that he also seemed to be almost happy at the thought of Jensen failing was a bit odd. "You won't fail," Misha said after a few minutes, causing Jensen to tense up again. "I'm gonna get off here. Mom's wanting to head out to dinner here shortly, so call me later. Remember that you're an hour behind." Misha didn't wait for a response, just hung up.
Jensen pulled his phone away from his ear and stared out it for a long moment, considering if he should call again and keep Misha on the line. Jensen knew the way Misha hung up was his way of not dealing with the pain of Jensen's leave, but it still bothered Jensen.
Slipping the phone into his pocket, Jensen hailed a cab. When it pulled up, Jensen stared at his reflection for a moment, seeing from his eyes that the happy-go-lucky person he used to be slip away from him, and hardness take its place.
Opening the door and sliding into the cab, he told the driver his destination and soon they were off, the airport getting farther behind them. Closing his eyes, Jensen did his best not to think of Misha, but he failed when a boy with blue eyes, an umbrella, and a smile brighter than the sun popped up behind his closed lids. The smile that made the rain seem like a far away thing.
Jensen jumped a bit when he felt a drop of something hit his hand. It was then he realized that he was crying. Angrily wiping the tears, he steeled himself, refusing to let his emotions go haywire and get the better of him. "Keep it together, Ackles," he whispered, tapping his cheeks and blinking a few times to keep his eyes clear.
For a brief moment he locked eyes with the driver. "Just drive. Ignore me." It was taking every fiber of Jensen's being to keep him from telling the driver to turn the car around and go back to the airport. Misha wasn't just his best friend, he was, in a way, Jensen's better half. Laying his head against the window, Jensen watched the Texan landscape pass in a blur, not really seeing anything.
Time Elapse
Arriving at the hotel, Jensen paid the cabby, and got out. Grabbing his things from the trunk, he hit the trunk letting the driver know he was good to go. He watched the driver ease into traffic and drive off, watching his last chance to head back home fall out of sight.
Forcing up a steel wall, Jensen made his way into the building before him and up to the desk. "Can I help you?" the woman said, the fakest smile on her face. Jensen freaked out a bit, but contained himself.
"I sure hope so," he said, pulling out his wallet and handing the woman -- whose name apparently was Maureen -- his ID. "I called about a room this morning. The name is Jensen Ackles." Looking between him and the ID in her hands, Maureen's smile got impossibly wider.
"Of course," she said, handing his ID back to him. She typed a few things into the computer before saying, "Ah, here you are. Room 407." Handing Jensen a key card, she told him how to get to his room and that if he needed anything, to call. Jensen thanked her and made his way to the elevator instead of the stairs, not wanting to be with his thoughts too long. Pressing the button for his floor, he relaxed a bit.
Hearing something hit between the doors, he jumped. "Holy shit!" he exclaimed, seeing a girl a couple years younger than him side in beside him.
"Sorry," she said, pushing the button for the floor above his. "I tried calling after you to hold the elevator."
"Ah, I'm sorry," he said, waving her apology away. "I'm a little out of it. Just moved here and my mind is a little frayed right now."
"Who was she?" the girl asked, causing Jensen to look at her in surprise. Before answering, he took a quick moment to think.
"No girlfriend," he said, after a while. "Just a close friend."
"Is that another way of saying 'I'm gay and I just left the man I loved more than anything'?" she said, smiling softly up at Jensen.
"Whoa, no," Jensen said, staring at her and thanking the gods that the elevator came to his floor. Without looking back, he stepped out, quickly making his way to the left, only to realize he was going the wrong way. Turning around, he started watching numbers.
He could have sworn he heard the girl giggle before the elevator closed.