Give Me Your Heart

Tossing onto her side, Riley let out a small irritated noise, her eyes glancing towards the clock which sat on the nightstand. It was late, after a comfortable movie night, Gerard and Riley had retired early to bed, not wanting to be overtired ahead of their flight home the next day, but since she had settled into bed beside him, Riley had found herself unable to sleep, her mind stuck on the engagement ring catalogue which was stowed in his suitcase. She knew that it shouldn’t have worried her, things between the two of them had been good since they’d gotten back together, but the idea of a proposal left her a little uncertain, something which had made it more than a little difficult to sleep.

Adjusting the blankets around her, she attempted to get a little more comfortable before she let out another small sound, tilting her head back in frustration. Eyeing the clock once more, she let out a small sigh before she pushed herself up, quietly padding out of the bedroom and into the living room where she sat herself down on the couch, flicking on the television. She knew that it was silly, the chances were that Gerard wasn’t going to propose for a while, but still the idea that he was contemplating it unsettled her. She had hoped after their previous conversation that she had deterred him a little.

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”

Riley, who’d been staring at the television, startled a little at the sound of Gerard’s voice before she turned, her expression a little surprised. “What are you doing up?” she posed.

Gerard shook his head. “You weren’t exactly quiet getting up, Ry” he muttered sleepily “And now you’re sat out here in the middle of the night, so, are you going to tell me what’s wrong or am I just going to have to guess again?” he posed.

“It’s…”

“Don’t say it’s nothing, Riley” Gerard interjected, shaking his head “You’ve been quiet for most of the day and now you’re up in the middle of the night. It’s clearly something” he added as he sat down beside her, sparing a yawn into his hand.

Riley offered him a small look before she sighed, something which caused him to shake his head, a slightly frustrated noise falling out of his mouth. “I am getting tired of playing this game with you, Ry” he noted gently “One second, things between the two of us are wonderful and the next, you’ve gotten into your head about us again. It’s starting to get on my nerves, nena” he mumbled gently. He didn’t want to fight with her, the last thing he wanted was to cause them a problem, but he was growing tired of it. One moment they seemed good, they seemed happy, and the next, there appeared to be something on Riley’s mind, something which played on his nerves.

Riley shook her head. “It’s just me, Gerard” she murmured.

Gerard rolled his eyes. “You expect me to believe that?” he quipped, his expression slightly incredulous.

“Gerard…”

“Just tell me the truth, Riley” Gerard interjected “What did I do this time?” he added.

Riley opened her mouth to refute it, to tell him that it was nothing, but she thought better of it. “You have a brochure in your suitcase” she noted.

Gerard tilted his head. “What?” he posed.

“In your suitcase, there’s a catalogue” Riley rephrased softly “It was in your sock drawer in your hotel room and I found it earlier. It’s got engagement rings in it, Gerard…”

Gerard scoffed, cutting Riley off. “That’s what’s gotten you so worked up?” he posed.

Riley spared him a slightly sheepish look, something which made him shake his head. “I should have known” he muttered.

“Gerard…”

“Is it something you’ve even thought about?” Gerard interjected, his eyes fixed on his feet.

Riley blinked. “Marriage?” she posed.

Gerard nodded, not looking up at her.

“I…I don’t know” Riley babbled “I mean, when I was a child, I thought about it, but now…”

“You don’t think about it with me?” Gerard cut in, his tone a little sharp.

“That’s not what I said” Riley noted “Gerard, you know that I love you” she added gently, her hands moving to take a hold of his.

Gerard glanced at their hands before he shook his head. “What is it you want, Riley?” he murmured softly “I know what I want, I’ve known for a while, but I have no idea what it is that you want. Do you want to move forwards with me at some point? Are you just with me because it makes sense or because I am who you want to be with?” he pressed, his expression soft. He didn’t want to push her, if he knew anything about Riley it was that she could be particularly stubborn when she wanted to be, but he needed something. He knew where he wanted their relationship to go, he’d been sure for a while, but he wasn’t quite so sure that she was on the same page. He wasn’t sure that she was as into them as he was.

Riley, who was looking down at their hands, shifted a little. “Gerard, I…I…”

Gerard shook his head, an ironic smirk on his face.

“Gerard…”

“I want to marry you, Riley” he muttered “I want to think about having a second baby, I want to think about living abroad in the future, and I am a little tired of having to out all of that on hold because you’re ‘just not there yet’” he added before padded back towards the bedroom.

Riley frowned a little and followed after him, her blue eyes widening a little as she watched him pull on a pair of shorts. “What are you doing?” she peeped.

“I am getting out of here before I say something I can’t take back” Gerard replied gruffly.

“Gerard, it’s been months, not years. I just don’t see the hurry” Riley protested, a few tears appearing in her eyes.

“The hurry is that I love you, Riley” Gerard replied “That I know that I love you, and I don’t see the need to wait around anymore. I’m sure of what I want, I have been for a long time now, and the idea that you’re not suggests maybe…maybe you’re just not as into us as I am” he mumbled as he moved to pull on a hoodie.

Riley shook her head. “That’s not fair” she sniffled “Gerard, I am as into this as you are. I just…this isn’t something I want to ruin by moving too quickly” she protested gently.

Gerard glanced at her for a moment before he shook his head. “Maybe we’re moving too slowly” he mumbled before he stepped towards her, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

Riley held onto him and sniffled a little before he stepped back, moving to pad out of the hotel room.

Riley listened to the small thud on the door before she sat down on the bed, allowing a small sniffle to fall out of her mouth, dreading the idea that she ahd somehow ruined a relationship she adored.