Divided Throne

Lily was curled up on a couch in the library, reading a story book to Lucian while he held Snowball and listened with rapt attention. Erwin was perched on Lily's shoulder and Raz was draped across the back of the couch behind her. Myron, Dugan and the Norton brothers were standing in the corner, trying not to squirm in their servant's livery.

"Is this really necessary?" Dugan grumbled. "I don't see why we couldn't at least wear our own clothes."

"You mean the tattered rags you showed up in?" Lily shot him a look. "I'm reading to Lucian. Shut up."

"So how'd you end up as a queen anyway?" Zachary asked.

"Angie...sorry, Agnes, named me as heir in case she died without one."

"I still can't believe she's dead." Frederick shook his head. "What a shame. Agnes was the best looking girl I've ever seen. Besides you, of course."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Shove it, Frederick. Your sad attempts at flattery have never worked on me."

"Especially now that she has that pretty king at her beck and call," Zachary snickered. Myron nudged him.

"Don't let him hear you call him pretty. I get the sense he wouldn't appreciate it," he warned. Lily almost smiled. Then Alec and Dominic entered the library, both looking ashen and grim.

"What's happened?" Lily asked, standing and clutching Lucian close.

"It's Rufus," Alec said, voice strained. "He's in Aegaera. His army has torched the outer villages. Razed them to the ground."

Lily's heart stopped. "He's here already?"

"He has Holden," Alec went on. There was a beat of silence and then he turned and punched the wall. Lucian let out a small whine, seeming to sense the anger and fear in the air. Lily hurried to the door, calling for Belle. She appeared quickly, eyes troubled.

"Have you heard-?"

"Yes. Hold Lucian for me while I tend to Alec."

Belle took the fussy baby into her arms and cooed softly to him to try and calm him down. Lily went to Alec and gently took his hand.

"Don't do that," she scolded. "All we need now is for you to break a hand."

All of them went to the council room, where Rhett, Tobias, Samuel, Hamilton, Gwendolyn and some other high ranking officers and advisors were already gathered.

"It doesn't look good," Hamilton said. It was the first time Lily had seen him looking anything but jolly. "Rufus is on the move. It won't be long before he reaches Little Aveling. We need to waste no time in getting as prepared as we can."

"That's nowhere near as prepared as we hoped to be," Alec said with a heavy sigh. "Do we have any chance of beating him?"

"There's always a chance," Samuel said firmly.

"I don't have anything to connect me to Rufus, but I can still try to use my gift to locate him, perhaps see where he may strike next," Gwendolyn spoke up softly.

"Do what you can. We need all the help we can get at this point," Alec said. Lily noticed that Dominic was standing next to Gwendolyn, and reached over to squeeze her hand briefly when he thought no one was looking. Despite the circumstances, Lily felt her eyebrow arch in surprise.

"I'm not going to lie," Alec said, "we are wholly unprepared for this attack. And we lost some of our own to Rufus already. We're going to need to rally every ounce of skill and courage we have if we want to stop him from destroying all of Aegaera."

"It doesn't make much sense to destroy a kingdom you want," Rhett muttered.

"This is more about a show of force for Rufus," Samuel said disgustedly. "He's always been this way."

Lily's nightmares grew worse in the next week, when she slept at all. Alec rarely even came to bed anymore until the wee hours of the morning. He was working round the clock with Hamilton and Dominic and the
rest to get the troops and castle ready for battle.

Lily found herself usually awake, staring into Lucian's crib while he slept. She was terrified that all her dreams of being unable to protect her family were about to come true. What was she going to do against the likes of Rufus and his army? Lily had survived more in her life than most people did, but if she lost Alec and Lucian her life would be over. That, she could never come back from.

She had prepared the tunnel beneath her old bedroom, in case she needed Belle to hide there with Lucian. But it didn't feel like enough. Everything was spiraling out of control and she was drowning in helplessness.

One evening she grew frustrated with lurking in her room fretting, so she went in search of Alec. He was in the throne room with the war council and Lily's personal manservants. They had plans scattered all across the long table and the floor, though Dominic was regaling them all with yet another story of his war heroics while a jug of ale circulated.

Lily felt a sudden surge of irrational fury. She knew she should take a breath and calm down. But she was at the end of her rope; terrified and sleep deprived and the sight of men like Dugan and the Nortons sitting and laughing casually with Alec like they somehow belonged there, made her so mad she could spit.

"Productive evening, gentlemen?" she asked in a velvety voice. The only ones who seemed to instantly recognize the danger were Myron and Tobias. Tobias was always perceptive, and Myron had heard that voice before. Usually right before Lily landed a clean throat punch. He grimaced and moved his seat carefully away from her.

"Well Dominic is telling his epic tales for about the five thousandth time, if you count that as productive." Alec shook his head. "Actually, your boy slaves here have had a few decent ideas. I guess you were right, keeping them out of the dungeon."

"Well that's what I was going for. Finding you some drinking buddies with decent ideas."

Alec frowned slightly. "Lily, are you all right?"

"Of course I am. A madman is rampaging across the kingdom burning villages as he goes, on his way here to murder you, and probably our son. Why wouldn't I be all right?"

Her voice was growing sharper, dripping with sarcasm and she didn't know how to make it stop. She knew she wasn't being completely fair. Everyone was watching her warily and she was acutely aware that she probably seemed a little crazy.

"Lily," Alec said quietly, standing. "We're all worried about Rufus. No one is taking this lightly, I promise you."

"Don't worry, Your Majesty," Frederick said breezily, taking a sip of ale. "Your castle should be safe as long as the Wildcat is protecting it." He smirked slightly and Lily spun, striking him hard in the face.

"What have I told you about that name?" she snarled. "Don't ever call me that name again, or I'll give you a demonstration of just how I earned it."

Frederick was cringing away from her, his cheek red. "All right! Hell, sorry. I was just trying to lighten the mood. I didn't think the name would bother you so much."

"Of course you didn't. You've never had an actual thought in your entire life. You make me sick."

"Hey I said I was sorry."

"You have plenty to be sorry for!"

"Lily, please." Alec looked at a loss for what to do. Lily rounded on him, trembling.

"Please what?" she snapped. Alec opened his mouth but didn't seem able to find any words. Lily whirled on her heel and stalked from the room, banging the door hard against the wall as she went. Halfway up the stairs Alec caught up to her, grabbing her shoulders and turning her to face him.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "Talk to me, Lily. This isn't like you."

"This is exactly like me!" she burst out. "That's the problem! You're working day and night to keep us safe, and they all see you as a great leader. You're so much better equipped to handle all of this while I have no idea what I'm doing! I don't know anything about being a mother, Alec, and I don't know if I can even protect my own son and I'm terrible at this and-"

"Stop," Alec said forcefully. Lily went silent, suddenly feeling like she might start sobbing.

"Stop," Alec repeated. "Don't ever say that again." He studied her face, his gaze softening. "Lily, you're a wonderful mother. No one is more capable of protecting Lucian than you." He pulled her into a tight embrace. "I'm sorry I didn't realize that you were worrying about this."

Lily shook her head, all her anger evaporating. "No. You've been focused on what you should be. Aegaera matters more than my self-doubt."

"Lucian loves you more than anyone. Why do you think you can't be a mother?"

"I never had one." Lily's shoulders drooped. "You at least had a home, with loving parents. I'm terrified that Lucian is going to take after me, but I want him to be like you, and like Belle and Tobias."

Alec shook his head, smiling softly. "Lily, nothing would make me happier than if Lucian turned out just like you."

Lily choked, burying her face in Alec's chest as tears began to fall. "I'm sorry for making a scene and yelling at you," she sniffed. "I've just been so scared lately and I-"

"It's already forgotten."

She pulled back to swipe at the tear tracks on her face, pausing when she noticed a sad-eyed Gwendolyn at the base of the stairs.

"Poor, sweet girl," she sighed. "I never meant for any of this to happen to you."

"What are you talking about?" Lily asked.

"Lily, darling, I think it's time I told you something very important. I know who your family is."

There was a long stretch of silence.

"What?" Lily said flatly. "Is that supposed to be some kind of joke? Because it's sick."

"It's no joke. I know who your mother and father are."

"How?" Lily demanded, heart pounding. Gwendolyn closed her eyes briefly.

"Because, Lily. I'm your mother. And I'm so, so terribly sorry that I lost you all these years. I never meant to be separated from you."

"No." Lily felt like her ears were ringing. "No. You're lying."

But she looked at Gwendolyn; with her long mane of fiery red hair, and her startling green eyes and small, slender frame. Lily was her spitting image. She thought about the tender, motherly way Gwendolyn always had around her and her head swam.

"But you...no." Lily shook her head, refusing to accept it. It was too much. It couldn't be true. She couldn't have been alone and unloved for twenty-one years just to have this strange woman before her, claiming to be her mother. Lily backed away, like a skittish animal. Gwendolyn just watched her sadly.

Lily turned and fled.