A Piece of the Universe

only seeing myself when I'm looking up at you

It wasn’t just one shade. It was too many, too deep. It was love and hatred and sorrow on a spectrum. It was the color of watching the universe rearrange your heart for two different people.

It was for HER
It was forgetting everything that was before. It was your teeth cutting your lip when he swung, the taste in your mouth and what you lost when you stood back up. It was watching home become something else. It was her lipstick and her goodbyes; it was the feeling in your ribcage on the plane when you thought, I still love you though. It was trying to find the ebb and flow in a new place, trying to put your feet down steadily—and wishing you would have stayed. It was still feeling like your bones were grinding against each other in the middle of the night when you couldn’t sleep. It was when your eyes closed and you saw her. It was wishing for everything and nothing.

It was the color of losing a small piece of yourself, of having your heart broken.

It was for HIM
It was the way you crashed into each other. From here to there, from the doorway to the late nights and it was the feeling in the pit of your stomach. It was his favorite sweater against his dark skin and the way he smiled. It was the bottles of wine shared in front of the skyline, feeling like you were more and less all the same. It was biting the inside of your cheek too hard. It was tracing from his palm to the curve of his neck and his sigh against your knuckles when you reached his chin. It was his fingertips against your wrist. It was feeling like you could let her go finally.

It was the color of falling in love again, of looking at your own hands and thinking, this is how we learn to be okay.
♠ ♠ ♠
swore I'd never lose control, then I fell in love with a heart that beats so slow

RED; this thing gave me so much trouble, it's ridiculous and shout out to Alex for helping me with this because she actually did lots (there was a lot of yelling)