In Dark Places

(Y/N) and Kylo Ren set course back to the Star Killer Base. They were both silent throughout the flight. Ren didn’t want to interrupt her thoughts; he knew that if he tried to soothe her he would only hurt her even more. He had never tried soothing anyone; he wasn’t any good at this, that’s why he didn’t even push himself. Suddenly, (Y/N) felt too tired to pilot the shuttle and set the autopilot to do it for her. She stretched her arms and crossed them behind her head.
“We should be back on the Star Killer Base in about an hour.” She turned to Ren with a perfectly even sounding voice, no emotion, nothing – just an announcement. She left the pilot seat and laid down on one of the leather couches. Her energy was too drained and she needed some shut eye. Ren followed her and after hesitating for a second, he sat beside the lying girl and looked in her eyes. She was a little confused as to what to expect, but she waited patiently for him.
“What happened?” He asked, trying to sound empathetic, but his voice came out just as impartial as always before.
“She was alive when I found her. She said what kept her alive was the hope that she would see me again one last time before she dies and…she died in my arms.” Her voice trembled as she looked into his eyes and she tried to swallow the tears, but they streamed hot down her face despite all effort. She tried to hide her face in her hands. As a tear rolled down her cheek, Ren’s hand caressed it and his thumb, covered with the leather glove, wiped the tear away. He looked into her eyes as he did that and for the first time she could see something in them, something which looked like compassion. There was no emotion written on the lines of his face, but as if his eyes were speaking to her, begging her not to cry. He found that seeing her cry wasn‘t making him feel right at all and he had never felt that before, he didn’t even think a feeling like that existed.
“It happened and there’s nothing you can do about it. Except fight. Life is a battlefield and this is a moment where you have to be stronger than ever in order not to be defeated.”
“You’re right, but…she was the last person I had left. My real father is dead – I have never even known him, Lord Vader is dead and he was like my actual father and now…my mother, the only one who I had left…she left me all alone, all by myself. I have always been alone, but not as alone as I am now. I have no family anymore.” (Y/N) cried, feeling as weak as never before and the only one standing beside her in those rough times was the only person she trusted, a person whose face she even thought would never see.
“The anger and the pain will make you stronger.”
“I can do this…” She closed her eyes tightly, trying to swallow her tears and convince herself in her own words.
“You can do this, but not before you stop crying. You can’t allow yourself to do that.”
“I know, and I’ve never before allowed it to myself, but I can’t help it at this time. I’m so helpless, my hands are tied, I can’t do anything about this and I’ve been through this before. I can’t bring her back.”
“No, you can’t. No one can. Be strong, Edenia.” He encouraged her and with a deep breath she swallowed her tears. This was the only way he could soothe her – tell her to fight, but he was right enough. The tears would only weaken her and she couldn’t allow herself that. “I think you should get some sleep until we get back.” Ren whispered, leaning closer to her and she slightly nodded before she closed her eyes. It wasn’t long until she was sound asleep and calm in her dreaming. The knight watched her breathing turning back to normal and she was finally in peace. But her being asleep, meant that he had unlimited success to her mind. He excused himself in his mind with the pretext he wasn’t going to dig around much, just find an answer to some questions. His hand hovered over her face and her mind was his. He saw different memories of hers, either happy or painful. He saw the day Vader took her away and introduced her to Lord Sidious; he saw an earlier memory of her running around with a little blond boy, which he supposed was Archer; he saw her teaching the siths the power of the Dark Side; he saw her sneaking unto the shuttle in the armor of a stormtrooper; he saw her memory of the forest where he kissed her for the first time; he saw the pain written on her face when she saw her mother die in her arms – the way she destroyed everything around and the way she burned her mother’s body. But what he was looking for was too sacred to be found and she was keeping it somewhere deep in the back of her mind, where only she had access to, but even she denied to enter those dark parts of her consciousness.
Destination Star Killer Base was reached, but Ren didn’t want to wake the sleeping girl up. He landed the shuttle all by himself. He covered his face with the mask again and took the girl princess style, carrying her on his arms to his very own room. He realized her condition is unstable and she’d be prone to getting in trouble, so he had to keep her under observation. He took off her cloak and her corset so she can breathe freely and he pulled the covers over her. After hesitating for a minute, he laid beside her after all. He was tired, too. He took a last glance over to the sleeping girl and he closed his eyes.
(Y/N) woke up, feeling much calmer and relaxed. The pain was still present and burning her, but she could suppress it. She looked around and discovered she’s not in her own room. She looked to the left and saw her master sleeping beside her. For a moment she got freaked out, so she almost jumped out of the bed, but that’s when Kylo Ren woke up and his eyes found hers.
“What am I doing here?” (Y/N) asked almost frightened.
“Sleeping. I couldn’t just leave you alone in your room. After the traumatizing events you might decide to do something rather…stupid, so I decided to keep an eye on you.” Ren explained calmly as if what was happening was a normal part of the everyday life.
“Even while I’m here, lying in your bed, you’re still so arrogant.” The girl shook her head almost in disgust, but she knew he was just that way and there was nothing she could to about it. Ren sat up.
“Arrogant?” He wrapped a hand around her neck gently and made her look in his eyes. “Is that what you think I am? Arrogant?” He asked in a quiet, threatening voice and the girl nodded. “Am I still as arrogant while I am practically holding your life in my hands and I can take it if I wish?”
“Yes, you are. But you wouldn’t do it.” The girl smirked. He pushed her back down on the bed and laid his hand on her chest.
“And you’ve still got a lot to learn.”
“So do you. But then again, we’re not flawless, let’s not forget that. You make it sound as if our flaws are weaknesses, yet we just haven’t learned all there is to learn.” Her words were as merciless as his in this game, played by two. He gazed in her eyes, thinking over her words and trying to reach to what she was thinking. He couldn’t. And as she was speaking of flaws, he felt a need he recently feels a lot, a need which he still described as a flaw, a weakness and it was the desire he felt. Beside all the harsh words and the arrogance, he still couldn’t manage to stay away from her. He thought being rough and cold to her would keep them away from each other; she thought playing his game would also keep her away from him, but this only drew them closer. His hand moved from her chest back to her neck and he leaned down to kiss her. This time her lips were cold while they were the only warmth he longed for. He deepened the kiss and she buried her fingers in his raven black hair.
After all Ren had said and done, (Y/N) didn’t know what to think anymore. He was being rude and cold and then he was trying to be nicer, he was distant and unreachable and the next moment his lips were on hers. What was it that was keeping them away from each other, she didn’t know. Was it his arrogance, was it his incapability of maintaining a close relationship with another human being, was it her fault? She couldn’t tell. Looking at the reflection in the mirror, she noticed she looks nothing like before. Things hadn’t changed a lot, but at the same time nothing was the same. She put on her cloak and headed for the command room where she was summoned to. The doors opened and she entered with fast and confident steps, her look was cold and her posture was threatening. She headed directly for the two men waiting for her to share the information – Hux and Ren. She stopped beside Ren, without even looking at him and she directed her attention to Hux.
“Now that you’re here, you must be informed that we finally are in position to capture the droid. Our fugitives are on Takodana, in Maz Kanata’s castle. There’s no way the droid isn’t with them.” Hux explained.
“So, do we have a plan?” (Y/N) asked impatiently. Ren turned to her, hoping she would take a single glance of him, but she didn’t.
“We do. As we speak, the stormtroopers are getting ready to take off for the planet. The rest must be decided in action.”
“And our primary weapon? Is it ready to be used?”
“Let’s just say that in a few hours the Republic will be history.”
“Thank you, General Hux.” The Sith Lord slightly bowed down and she made her way out of the room. Ren was burning with anger for she didn’t even acknowledge his presence, so he caught up with her. He stopped her, catching her roughly by the upper arm, making her turn around to face him. “What do you want?”
“Where do you think you are going?”
“On a mission.”
“You’re not going anywhere. You’re staying here. It’s for your safety.” Ren stated and his word would take no objections.
“My safety? Do you even hear what you’re saying, master Ren? I can’t just stay here on board while everyone is actually doing something helpful. I am supposed to be of help, I am supposed to fight, not to stay here and be informed of what’s happening just to stay blankly.”
“I won’t change my mind. You’re staying here. And as you promised, you must obey my orders.” Ren stated and headed for the shuttle. He just turned his back on her and she wouldn’t take any of this, so she caught up with him.
“So you’re going out there to do something significant and I’m staying here, keeping all I’ve learned to myself even though it can be of much help?”
“Your time will come.” Ren remained as arrogant and self-confident as always.
“Don’t play with me!” She shouted after him and he stopped, turning around on the heel of his battle boots.
“You…are staying…here.” He ordered almost as a whisper as he made her lift her eyes up to his by putting a finger under her chin. She hardly contained herself not to scream at him that she hates him, because she knew that wasn’t true, it was just a result of her anger. She returned to the command room and stared through the panel window, watching the Delta-class DX-9s fly off along with the shuttle. She was supposed to be in that shuttle with Ren. Anger built up in her again and clouded her sober judgement. She walked up to Hux with a pretended calm look on her face.
“General Hux,” -she started, looking straight into his eyes. She hoped his character was weak enough for the Force to take effect on his consciousness – “you are going to authorize my takeoff with a tie fighter.”
“I am going to authorize your takeoff with a tie fighter.” Hux said under the influence of the Force.
“Thank you, General Hux.” (Y/N) smiled kindly, which was actually a victorious smirk and she headed for the airfield. Sure, she could only pilot the tie fighter and not shoot if necessary, but she was determined to battle with her two own hands. She sat on the pilot seat and took off for Takodana. She caught up with the rest of the fleet. The thought that Kylo Ren doesn’t even suspect she is joining them made her smirk. Was he going to be furious or what!
The fleet landed near Maz Kanata’s castle. It was time for action. (Y/N) landed with the tie fighter and waited for everyone to get off the aircrafts. She watched Kylo Ren as he was leaving the shuttle – masked and confident as always, or at least, as confident as he wanted to look. The superweapon was activated and the Republic was now past. This warmed (Y/N) a little on the inside. To her the Republic was the poison of the galaxy.
The castle was being invaded by the stormtroopers in search for the droid and the Resistance somehow happened to show up at the right place in the right time. (Y/N) clenched her fists and her jaw muscles tightened. It was the call of revenge. She pulled out her lightsaber and turned it on. Jumping out of the tie fighter, she ran towards the first rebel that happened in front of her eyes and slashed him in two. She killed a dozen of rebels like that, blinded so much by fury that she didn’t even acknowledge the signals of her senses, she didn’t even acknowledge the Force’s guidance, all she was out for was blood.
Kylo Ren had been given the coordinates of the so wanted droid and he had entered the forest in search for it. He could hear the firing of the blasters, the screams, but there was something else he felt. He felt a familiar source of power, someone greatly skilled in the ways of the Force, someone he knew well. He didn’t want to admit it at first, as he didn’t want to believe she could have stepped over his explicit orders, but it was her. Her power was growing together with the anger and this made her easier to be sensed. The Knight clenched his fists and all his muscles tensed up from fury. This time he was going to teach her to obey.
A downside to the increase of power the redhead had was that this was blinding her other senses, making her ignore the Force, which at the same time weakened her. Just a moment off-guard and this could cost her a lot. General Organa saw the girl cutting down her brave rebels and judging by her skills, she knew this can’t be an ordinary fighter of the First Order. Even more, she knew that she could have information about her son, or at least what was left of her son.
“Capture that girl, I want her unharmed.” General Organa ordered to her soldiers. They surely had a time fulfilling that order, but (Y/N) was weakened. Her stamina was low and the fact that she couldn’t sense anything betrayed her. She couldn’t sense the soldiers coming from behind her, not until they had her on the ground. She dropped her lightsaber and it was taken away from her.
“No!” (Y/N) screamed at the top of her lungs as she was kicking in attempt to free herself while she was being carried to the General.
“Lock her somewhere.” Leia ordered when the rebels appeared in front of her with the redheaded warrior and they did as told.
(Y/N) was weakened and exhausted, her hands were cuffed behind her back and her feet were cuffed to the chair she was sitting on. She didn’t even try to escape; she had to replenish her powers again, she was hardly keeping her eyes open. General Leia Organa entered along with two rebels.
“Leave us.” She ordered to the rebels.
“General Organa, this is a dangerous prisoner, are you sure about this?” One of them asked.
“Don’t worry, there’s nothing she can do.” With those words, the rebels left. Leia sat across her prisoner with somewhat of sympathy written on her face.
“General Organa…” (Y/N) smirked wearily. She knew who that was. It wasn’t only the general of the Resistance, but also the mother of the man she fell for. This was giving her mixed feelings for one – she wanted the Resistance burned to the ground, which meant the mastermind behind it had to die too, but the mastermind happened to be Ren’s mother and (Y/N) couldn’t possibly teach him to value his family if she killed his mother.
“That must be me. And what about you? Who are you?” The girl lift her eyes up to the general, looking from under her eyebrows and as if the features of her face were saying “are you ready for this conversation?”
“Let’s not make this complicated. My name is (Y/N), but I’m better known by Lord Edenia.” At the mentioning of her name, Leia’s pupils dilated. “I’m Vader’s adopted daughter. Maybe apprentice sounds better.”
“Many of us thought you didn’t exist, that your existence was just a rumor.”
“In the Resistance and outside the Empire – maybe. But those on the Dark Side knew about the Sith Lord master Vader had trained. After the Empire fell down everyone thought I was dead because I couldn’t train siths anymore, but here I am. Alive, after all that happened.”
“You’re in the First Order, aren’t you?” Every word that came out of Leia Organa’s mouth sounded bitter. She was also being torn apart in two when it was her son’s card laid on the table.
“Of course I am, it’s the new Empire.” The redhead smiled proudly.
“What’s your position there? You didn’t seem like just any fighter with those skills out on the battlefield. Are you by some chance an apprentice of…Ben?” The general’s voice was full of hope. All she wanted from the girl was any information she had about her son.
“Ben? Ah, you mean Kylo Ren.” (Y/N) smirked again, seeing the pain written on Leia’s face. “Yes, he is my new master. I’m his apprentice and soon to be, Knight of Ren. Well, after my little episode here I am starting to doubt this, but…”
“How close are you to my son? What can you tell me about him? Is he alright?” The older woman was ready to trust the Sith Lord, all she would do to know a little about her son.
“Very close. Don’t worry, your son is alright. He is better than ever actually, now that the Republic is destroyed. But he'll feel even better when he finally gets to Skywalker.”
“I feel the hate towards me in your voice. You could have killed me by now. The question is why you haven’t killed me yet.”
“The answer is simple, General Organa. And it concerns your son. Anyone could tell he doesn’t value his family…at all…not even a bit. And even though I’m a child of the Dark Side, I’m strong enough to know that the family is not what pulls one to the light and that the family must be valued. My own mother was on the Light Side, yet I never felt pulled to it because of her. Your son believes that was Vader’s mistake – the value of the family. But here’s where he’s wrong. It’s not the family. It’s him. His origins are Light; he used to be with the Light, that’s all. He might be my teacher, but there’s something he can learn from me. And what I want to teach him is to value his family, because you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. You can’t really teach someone to love their family if you kill their mother or father, can you?” (Y/N) shook her head with a smile.
“Have you always been on the Dark Side?”
“Always. Since I can remember myself I have always been on the Dark Side.”
“Tell me something, (Y/N). What is it that you have for my son? How do you feel about him?” Leia looked suspiciously and confusion was written all over (Y/N)’s face. She didn’t know if that was a trick question and how to answer that question.
In the meantime, Kylo Ren had captured the mysterious girl going under the name of Rey. Drifting through her mind, he found that she had seen the map. That same map for which they had chased the droid from planet to planet. With that information in his hands, he decided they had acquired what they need. He waved his hand and the girl dropped unconscious in his arms. Déjà vu, he had done this before too. The memory clearly flashed before his eyes – the long red curls of the girl, dropping on her shoulders. He recalled how angry he was for all the troubles she caused them. Yet it was a happy memory to him. Shaking off the thoughts, he returned to the shuttle and left the girl on board.
“Stay here and watch over her. I’ve got some work to finish.” Kylo Ren gave explicit orders to the stormtroopers. While walking out, one of the troopers stopped him.
“Sir, we’ve got information that Lord Edenia has been spotted here on the battlefield, killing rebels.” The trooper explained.
“So, where is she now?” The Knight asked impatiently. The trooper gulped at the question. Ren was going to be furious.
“As far as we know she has been captured by the Resistance, but we didn’t get explicit orders for rescue.” He replied, sweating under the armor. Ren almost turned red under his mask as he clenched his fists.
“Edenia!” He screamed angrily as he pulled out his lightsaber and turned it on. He figured the only place she could be held in was the rebel troop carrier. Turning his lightsaber on, he killed everyone who got in his way on his path to the carrier.
Inside the carrier, General Organa was still waiting for an answer to her question.
“So?” Leia looked expectantly at the redheaded girl. She looked like she was going to answer the question any moment, but she had actually felt some presence, familiar presence approaching the troop carrier. She knew it could be only one person and she smirked at the thought, looking down to the ground in expectation. Just a moment later Kylo Ren broke in, taking off his mask. (Y/N) smirked and lift her eyes to her master.
“Master Ren…” Every feature of his was giving away his anger. That didn’t speak well.
“Ben…” Leia rose to her feet, staring at her son, unable to believe she is actually seeing his face again.
“Mother…” He said with a tone of disgust, maybe even hate and loathing. “Let’s go.” He commanded, looking over to (Y/N). She freed herself from the cuffs as if they were never even cuffed and she rose to her feet. She took her lightsaber and stopped at the door beside Ren, looking at Leia.
“General Organa…” She bowed down to the older woman with a smile, almost as if she did it ironically and she ran off with Ren. Leia now had the answer to the question that (Y/N) didn’t answer. They hurried to the command shuttle, but (Y/N) recalled she came with a tie fighter. She was about to go for it, but Ren caught her roughly by the wrist and stopped her.
“Where do you think you’re going now?” He hissed at her.
“I came here with a tie fighter.”
“I happen to already know that. Someone else will take care of it. You’re coming with me.” He barked, pulling her towards the inside of the shuttle. He pushed her to a secluded corner of the shuttle and with his hand on her neck; he pressed her against the wall. He was rough, but not as rough as to hurt her. “I guess it’s time I teach you to obey your master.” Ren hissed while looking at her lips as she was breathing heavily under him. She gulped. Now the time had come to worry about the “stupid and reckless decision.”