Welcome to the Family
Lost
Welcome To The Family
Chapter 3
Lost
That night was spent wide awake & deep in thought. Mom was sticking around for a few more days. I wasn't sure what to think about the whole situation, at least not yet. Could this really be happening? It all felt surreal.
When I woke up, my mom had texted me multiple times, begging me to talk to her. After a few minutes, I texted her back, telling her to meet me at Denny's. Slipping into my Crown The Empire shirt & black skinny jeans, I sat on the edge of my bed. I sat there for a few minutes before I realized that I was crying. I had no idea how to approach this situation & I was terrified.
"You can do this." I took a deep breath & told myself. Standing up, I walked to my mirror. I picked up my black eyeliner & carefully applied it, trying to stop my tears from flowing & messing up my make up. When I was done, I slipped into my red flip flops & walked out the door.
I walked the mile to Denny's where my mom was waiting on me.
"Hey." she said, softly.
"Hey." I sighed, crossing my arms & looking away.
"Look, Jazz, I'm sorry. I know I should've told you sooner. I was wrong to keep it a secret for so long."
"Yeah." I said, walking inside.
"Jazz, stop. We need to talk about this." she said as she chased after me.
"So now you wanna talk about it?" I scoffed, finding a seat.
"It's time. It's overdue. You deserve to have your questions answered." she said as she sat across from me.
"Okay, but you better be honest & no no avoiding any more questions. Deal?" I told her.
"Deal what do you wanna know?"
"Does he really even know about me?"
"Sort of. He knew I got pregnant, but I left months before I started showing. He asked if I was going to keep you. I told him I didn't know." she sighed as the waitress brought us our coffee.
"Did he want me?"
"Yes, he said he'd do everything in his power to take care of us. I knew what that meant for him, though. I could not allow myself to hold him back so I broke it off."
"Did he even try to stop you?"
"Yes. He begged & pleaded, but I left anyway."
"Should I try to contact him?"
"I don't know. I really don't. It's been years since I've talked to or seen him. I'm not sure what kind of person he is now." she said, sipping her coffee. I just sat there, deep in thought.
"I don't even know how I would get a hold of him."
"The only possible way I could think of is to go to his parents. They'd have his number, address, all that."
"Then that's where I'll start."
"It's probably better if I go to them. They know me."
"Good idea." I said, taking a sip from my coffee. We ate our breakfast & discussed how we would do this.
"I'd like to do this as soon as possible." I told her.
"I can go over there today if you want." she sighed, finishing her eggs.
"That'd be great, mom." I grinned.
"Well, I guess there's no time to waste. I better head out."
"Thanks, mom. Really."
"I love you, Jasmine." she hugged me as I hugged her back. I decided to walk back to my dorm to wait for her to come back to me. I sat on my bed, fiddling with my phone, listening to music, reading magazines. Anything to keep me occupied. Two hours later, my phone started buzzing. It was my mom.
"I got his number & his address. I gave them the basic rundown of the situation. Jimmy - I mean your dad doesn't know yet."
"Thanks, mom." I sighed, relieved.
"Yeah. Well, go get 'em tiger." she said, sounding a little worried.
"It'll be alright. I'll be fine. I'll figure this out." After hanging up the phone, I hurriedly put on my shoes & grabbed my car keys. Walking out the door, my mind started racing. I tried to quiet mmy thoughts to no avail. The short drive there was Hell on my mind. All I could do was think. Once I found his address, my heart started racing & it all became real. I took a deep breath & got out of the car, ready for anything, good or bad. Walking to his front door felt like it was five miles when it was only about seventy feet away. My palms started sweating & my arm felt heavy as I raised it up to knock on the front door. When I did, I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. I was insanely nervous. Then I heard footsteps. The door opened & there he stood, my father.
"Can I help you?"
"Hi, I don't know if you remember me from the beach -"
"Oh, yeah. Charlotte's daughter, yeah. What's up?"
"Can I come in? I just need to talk to you. It's kind of important."
"Yeah, come on in." he smiled, stepping aside to allow me in. He was acting rather happy which I thought was weird considering how he stormed off the last time I'd seen him. I followed him into his living room & sat on the couch while he sat in a crimson armchair in the corner nearby.
"So what can I do for you?"
"Well, you obviously know my mom, Charlotte. I'm her daughter."
"Yeah, I gathered that." he chuckled.
"Yeah. Look, I don't know else to say this, but she told me that you're my father." his cheery smile quickly faded to a confused frown.
"Forgive me, but I'm just a little confused. Your mom told me she had a miscarriage. We split up shortly after because she decided to leave."
"Was she showing?"
"No, it was too early to tell. She took another test after she told me to prove it. It was negative. I later found out, she had tried to have an abortion & didn't tell me. Obviously, it didn't take."
"Why would she lie about something like that?"
"She felt guilty. She knew I wanted to keep you, but she didn't want me to throw away my dreams."
"So now what?"
"I don't know. I'm not really a good father figure. It's probably best you forget all this."
"You're just going to abandon me? Again? After all these years?" I said, tears forming in my eyes.
"What do you want from me?" he asked, annoyed.
"I want you to act like you give a shit about me!"
"I can't. I don't want a family. I don't need one."
"I'm your daughter asshole!"
"I don't have a daughter. I don't have any kids. How do I even know that you're mine?"
"I cannot believe you. To think that I looked up to you."
"That's your mistake. Now, I think it's best you leave."
"Fine. Fuck you." I growled, storming out to my car, tears streaming down my face. Once I got in, I broke down. I bawled my eyes out & drove home. Once there, I threw myself onto my bed & cried until I fell asleep.
Chapter 3
Lost
That night was spent wide awake & deep in thought. Mom was sticking around for a few more days. I wasn't sure what to think about the whole situation, at least not yet. Could this really be happening? It all felt surreal.
When I woke up, my mom had texted me multiple times, begging me to talk to her. After a few minutes, I texted her back, telling her to meet me at Denny's. Slipping into my Crown The Empire shirt & black skinny jeans, I sat on the edge of my bed. I sat there for a few minutes before I realized that I was crying. I had no idea how to approach this situation & I was terrified.
"You can do this." I took a deep breath & told myself. Standing up, I walked to my mirror. I picked up my black eyeliner & carefully applied it, trying to stop my tears from flowing & messing up my make up. When I was done, I slipped into my red flip flops & walked out the door.
I walked the mile to Denny's where my mom was waiting on me.
"Hey." she said, softly.
"Hey." I sighed, crossing my arms & looking away.
"Look, Jazz, I'm sorry. I know I should've told you sooner. I was wrong to keep it a secret for so long."
"Yeah." I said, walking inside.
"Jazz, stop. We need to talk about this." she said as she chased after me.
"So now you wanna talk about it?" I scoffed, finding a seat.
"It's time. It's overdue. You deserve to have your questions answered." she said as she sat across from me.
"Okay, but you better be honest & no no avoiding any more questions. Deal?" I told her.
"Deal what do you wanna know?"
"Does he really even know about me?"
"Sort of. He knew I got pregnant, but I left months before I started showing. He asked if I was going to keep you. I told him I didn't know." she sighed as the waitress brought us our coffee.
"Did he want me?"
"Yes, he said he'd do everything in his power to take care of us. I knew what that meant for him, though. I could not allow myself to hold him back so I broke it off."
"Did he even try to stop you?"
"Yes. He begged & pleaded, but I left anyway."
"Should I try to contact him?"
"I don't know. I really don't. It's been years since I've talked to or seen him. I'm not sure what kind of person he is now." she said, sipping her coffee. I just sat there, deep in thought.
"I don't even know how I would get a hold of him."
"The only possible way I could think of is to go to his parents. They'd have his number, address, all that."
"Then that's where I'll start."
"It's probably better if I go to them. They know me."
"Good idea." I said, taking a sip from my coffee. We ate our breakfast & discussed how we would do this.
"I'd like to do this as soon as possible." I told her.
"I can go over there today if you want." she sighed, finishing her eggs.
"That'd be great, mom." I grinned.
"Well, I guess there's no time to waste. I better head out."
"Thanks, mom. Really."
"I love you, Jasmine." she hugged me as I hugged her back. I decided to walk back to my dorm to wait for her to come back to me. I sat on my bed, fiddling with my phone, listening to music, reading magazines. Anything to keep me occupied. Two hours later, my phone started buzzing. It was my mom.
"I got his number & his address. I gave them the basic rundown of the situation. Jimmy - I mean your dad doesn't know yet."
"Thanks, mom." I sighed, relieved.
"Yeah. Well, go get 'em tiger." she said, sounding a little worried.
"It'll be alright. I'll be fine. I'll figure this out." After hanging up the phone, I hurriedly put on my shoes & grabbed my car keys. Walking out the door, my mind started racing. I tried to quiet mmy thoughts to no avail. The short drive there was Hell on my mind. All I could do was think. Once I found his address, my heart started racing & it all became real. I took a deep breath & got out of the car, ready for anything, good or bad. Walking to his front door felt like it was five miles when it was only about seventy feet away. My palms started sweating & my arm felt heavy as I raised it up to knock on the front door. When I did, I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. I was insanely nervous. Then I heard footsteps. The door opened & there he stood, my father.
"Can I help you?"
"Hi, I don't know if you remember me from the beach -"
"Oh, yeah. Charlotte's daughter, yeah. What's up?"
"Can I come in? I just need to talk to you. It's kind of important."
"Yeah, come on in." he smiled, stepping aside to allow me in. He was acting rather happy which I thought was weird considering how he stormed off the last time I'd seen him. I followed him into his living room & sat on the couch while he sat in a crimson armchair in the corner nearby.
"So what can I do for you?"
"Well, you obviously know my mom, Charlotte. I'm her daughter."
"Yeah, I gathered that." he chuckled.
"Yeah. Look, I don't know else to say this, but she told me that you're my father." his cheery smile quickly faded to a confused frown.
"Forgive me, but I'm just a little confused. Your mom told me she had a miscarriage. We split up shortly after because she decided to leave."
"Was she showing?"
"No, it was too early to tell. She took another test after she told me to prove it. It was negative. I later found out, she had tried to have an abortion & didn't tell me. Obviously, it didn't take."
"Why would she lie about something like that?"
"She felt guilty. She knew I wanted to keep you, but she didn't want me to throw away my dreams."
"So now what?"
"I don't know. I'm not really a good father figure. It's probably best you forget all this."
"You're just going to abandon me? Again? After all these years?" I said, tears forming in my eyes.
"What do you want from me?" he asked, annoyed.
"I want you to act like you give a shit about me!"
"I can't. I don't want a family. I don't need one."
"I'm your daughter asshole!"
"I don't have a daughter. I don't have any kids. How do I even know that you're mine?"
"I cannot believe you. To think that I looked up to you."
"That's your mistake. Now, I think it's best you leave."
"Fine. Fuck you." I growled, storming out to my car, tears streaming down my face. Once I got in, I broke down. I bawled my eyes out & drove home. Once there, I threw myself onto my bed & cried until I fell asleep.