Even If You Don't

Mari's POV; Four days later

London

"Ash, I'm not moving here permanently," Calum said into his phone as he walked out of my bedroom.

We had been back in London for a couple hours now, only just arriving back at my apartment when Calum's phone started ringing. He had obviously told the band he was staying with me for the next six months before we left Indianapolis, and Ashton apparently had a few choice things to say about the last-minute planning of it all but was only able to get ahold of his bandmate after we got home.

"I told you why already, Ashton-" I could just tell Calum was rolling his eyes, making me laugh softly. "-I'm staying with Mar until the iHeart Awards. ... I'm not asking you to send me all of my belongings. ... I'll be back for a couple weeks during Christmas anyway; I just need you to send some clothes, my guitar, and my journals! ... Well, then you can yell at me then. ..." He sighed sharply, "Yes, Ashton, I will pay you back for shipping. ... Are you gonna send my stuff or not? ... Thank you. ... Yeah, I'll talk to you guys later. ... Bye." He sighed again, a little more softly this time, stuffing his phone back into his pocket and coming into the kitchen where I was.

"Is Ash mothering you again?" I snickered, making him frown.

"I didn't realize I was moving out of my parent's house just to move in with another mum," he grumbled, cracking a smile when I giggled again. I walked over to him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"He cares about you, Cal," I reminded him while his own arms wrapped around my waist.

"I know," he sighed again, kissing my forehead, "He can just be a bit much sometimes."

"Kinda like you when I caught that cold on tour?" I grinned.

"That's different," he pouted, "You were sick; I didn't want it to get worse."

"You were still mothering me, Cal," I giggled.

"Fine," he rolled his eyes, "But at least it wasn't as bad as when Kenz lost her voice."

"Jesus," I laughed again, "I thought Ash was actually going to burn the place down."

"Pretty sure he would've if it hadn't been for the fact that it was in Sydney and his mum was there to calm him down."

"God bless Anne," I sighed, only to let out a sharp shriek when I felt Calum's fingers start poking at my sides.

"C-C-Cal! Stop!" I begged through my involuntary laughter.

"Ah, what's the magic word?" he shook his head. I huffed lightly, not wanting to admit defeat but knowing I had to – he was a lot stronger than me and I wouldn't be able to fight him off.

I quickly moved my arms from around his neck and let my hands slide to his cheeks, pulling his face to mine. I felt him smile as he kissed me, finally stopping the tickling. When I pulled away, I watched his eyes flutter open and he looked at me with a fond expression.

"I love you," Calum told me, and I couldn't keep the grin off my own face.

"Pretty sure you've said that a hundred times since you woke up this morning," I commented.

"Have to make up for all the times I was too afraid to say it," he replied, only making my smile get bigger.

"I love you too," I said softly, earning myself another bright grin as he kissed me again.

~

Calum's POV; The next morning

"Cal, you'll be fine," Mari assured me with a roll of her eyes as we walked side-by-side down the long hallway to the room the rest of Lost and Found was waiting in.

Mari had gotten a text from Kenzie that they were going into the studio to write some new songs. She asked me if I wanted to tag along – and I did, but I was still a bit nervous about it. Mari's bandmates and I hadn't seen or spoken to each other since I randomly showed up that day I was looking for Mari, and I had a sinking feeling that it wasn't going to go well this time either despite the fact that Mari had forgiven me for what I did.

"I don't know..." I mumbled, "They were really mad..."

"Are you cheating on me with one of them?" she asked calmly, taking me by surprise.

"W-What?" I shook my head in disbelief – where did that even come from?

"Are you in a relationship with any of them?"

"Of course not!" I exclaimed softly, "Why would you thi-"

"Then why are you so worried?" she shook her own head and I felt her hand squeeze mine, "Why are you so worried what they think?"

"Because they're your best friends," I grumbled, "I don't want them to hate me... If you had to pick between me and them, I know you'd pick them..."

"But I don't have to pick, Cal," she smiled gently, "So please stop being nervous."

"Okay," I exhaled sharply, "You're right; I can do this." I heard a soft giggle beside me, letting my body relax as Mari tugged me into the room.

"Hey, guys!" she beamed, making her friends look up.

"Mari!" they cheered in unison, "We've missed you!" She let go of my hand to hug her bandmates while I just stood in the doorway.

"Calum," Kaylynn nodded, but her voice was monotone.

"Kay," Mari warned with a slight smile on her face, "You promised."

"I'm being nice!" she defended.

"Yeah," Kenzie agreed before looking over at me, "Just gonna take a while to get used to having you around again." I swallowed lightly but nodded in agreement – I can't imagine how they must have felt having to watch Mari go through the break up, only to have the person who did it to her back in her life.

"So," Mari chirped, coming back over to me as she spoke to the girls, "What are we thinking about writing today?" She took my hand and pulled me over to the couch, making me sit down before taking her own seat on my lap. I looked at her with a small grin, barely noticing the other girls watching out of the corner of my eye.

"We're not sure yet," Vanessa sighed, "Geoff said we need at least one new song before iHeart, but we haven't been able to come up with anything."

"Well, we have ideas of what we'd like to do," Kenzie interjected, "We just don't know which would be better for the show."

"How about we don't focus on iHeart right now?" Mari suggested.

"But we have to get something written for it," she shook her head.

"I know," she nodded, "But it's a lot harder to write a song when you're stressing yourself out over it." I let out a breath of agreement, making Mari glance at me since she was the only one close enough to hear it.

"You mean write a practice song?" Kaylynn asked curiously.

"Something like that," she shrugged, "And if we like it enough, we can release it later."

"So what are you thinking then?"

"Well... Older people are always complaining that 'songs these days have no meaning' and 'the lyrics are just a bunch of gibberish'," Mari shook her head, a smile beginning to form on her face, "So let's just give them what they expect to hear."

"You mean like, Blank Space style?" Kenzie grinned.

"Crazier," she perked up, "Let's make ourselves into the psycho bitches people seem to think we are!"

"I could get into this," Kaylynn snickered.

"I'm definitely in," Vanessa giggled.

~

Two hours later

"Okay," Kenzie plopped back down in her seat, a guitar now on her lap, "Are we ready to put it all together?"

"Hope it sounds good," Vanessa said as she finished tuning her own guitar.

"I hope it feels good!" Mari announced. I couldn't help but groan involuntarily as I was looking at my phone, earning a chorus of laughs.

"If you think the 5SOS references are bad when you're here, you should see her when you're not," Kenzie mentioned, making me look at them.

"You all know not to say 'sounds good' around me!" my girlfriend frowned, "It's a reflex that haunts me every day; I wish I could control it, but I can't!"

"Now you're just being dramatic," I snorted softly.

"You haven't seen dramatic yet, Calum," Vanessa shook her head with a smile. Mari simply rolled her eyes and began playing the song, making the girls laugh again as she was silently telling them the conversation was over.

[Kenzie]

I screen saved all the photos from your family vacations
I checked out all your Spotify recommendations
I followed you on Twitter and Instagram too
Is there anywhere else I can find you?

[Vanessa, Kaylynn]

Every 15 minutes, I'm refreshing your page
Refreshing your page, refreshing your page
Every 15 minutes, I'm refreshing your page
Refreshing your page, refreshing your page

[Kenzie, Vanessa, Kaylynn]

It was love at first sight, except you tried to ignore me
You were playing hard to get
Now I wanna be your girlfriend, but you can't ignore me
'Cause I found you on the internet

Now I always know who you're with, where you are, and what you're doing
I just wish it was me that you were pursuing
And the funny thing is, you haven't got a clue
That I've got a crush on you

[Kaylynn]

I get notified you've posted on Facebook
Sure enough, there's a new photo on your wall
Within a few minutes, I see some blonde chick liked it
I bet that she's your late night booty call

[Vanessa]

You send out a tweet that today was a great day
But how it could be without me there?
I bet it's 'cause you're sleeping with that blonde chick on Facebook
The one with the bleached, peroxide hair

[Kenzie, Kaylynn]

Every 15 minutes, I'm refreshing your page
Refreshing your page, refreshing your page
Every 15 minutes, I'm refreshing your page
Refreshing your page, refreshing your page

[Kenzie, Vanessa, Kaylynn]

It was love at first sight, except you tried to ignore me
Tried to ignore me, tried to ignore me
So I found you online and now you can't ignore me
You can't ignore me, you can't ignore me

Now I always know who you're with, where you are, and what you're doing
I just wish it was me that you were pursuing
And the funny thing is, you haven't got a clue
That I've got a crush on you

I watched Mari quickly pull out her phone and toss it to me. I caught it and unlocked it, already knowing what she wanted me to do. I opened her camera and started recording her just before she started singing her part of the song.

[Mari]

You'll never know the pain I feel as I watch you from afar
I can't deny that my love is real
I even know who your friends of friends of friends are

I never knew how love could hurt until I put you on my Google alert
Every post, every tweet; It's so hard to see that it's not about me
Not about me

[Kenzie, Vanessa, Kaylynn]

It was love at first sight, except you tried to ignore me
Tried to ignore me, tried to ignore me
So I found you online and now you can't ignore me
You can't ignore me, you can't ignore me

Now, I always know who you're with, where you are, and what you're doing
I just wish it was me that you were pursuing
And the funny thing is, you haven't got a clue
That I've got a crush on you

[Mari]

Oh crap, you just blocked me from viewing your Facebook
Crap, you just blocked me from your Twitter too
You sent me an email to leave you alone

Well, guess what...
I still like you

The song ended and the girls immediately busted out laughing.

"That was so good!" Kenzie cheered, "We're definitely recording and releasing it for real!"

"I say we get some secondary opinions though," Mari snickered, coming back to me.

I handed her phone back to her as she plopped down beside me. I glanced at her screen, watching her open her messages and compose a new one. She sent the video in a group text to Ashton, Michael, and Luke, along with a message: Part of the new song we're working on so far!!! What do you guys think?

"They are gonna be so confused," I couldn't help but chuckle.