Simple Man

Dean sighed as he blankly stared ahead, driving down an open road. His hands were gripped tightly around the steering wheel as he contemplated the reasons why they were going to Texas. Sasha couldn’t seem to give them any details on the case they were supposedly going to solve, and he found it suspicious. In the back of his mind, he figured that she just wanted to go so she could go sight-seeing. To be perfectly honest, he wasn’t totally against the idea either. He had wanted a day off for a while; they had been going from town to town with no breaks in between. As he pulled over to a gas station near the motel they were going to stay in, he stepped out into the hot Texas heat and grimaced. It was a bit too toasty for him, so he pulled his jacket off and tossed it in the back seat, then chuckled as it landed right on Sasha’s face.

“Asshole,” She muttered, then climbed out of the Impala so she could go to the restroom. “You want anything to drink?”

Dean shook his head and started filling the car up with gas, looking around him at his surroundings. They were right outside Dallas, about fifteen minutes away from the big city. As he pumped the gas, he was barely listening to the radio, but rolled his eyes and lowered his head as he listened to the advertisement, then glared at Sasha as she walked out of the convenience store. “Sasha,” He growled and she gave him a worried look as she got closer to him. “I know exactly why we’re here.”

She gave him a weak smile and bit her lip, “Why’s that?”

He shook his head, “You just want to go to the Blake Shelton concert, don’t you?” Sasha gave him a grin and nodded her head, “You brought us all the way here so you could go to some dumb concert?”

She shrugged her shoulders, “Sorry?” Dean rolled his eyes again and climbed back into the Impala, slamming the door once he was in, “If it makes you feel any better, I bought all of us tickets!”

Both Sam and Dean looked at her with blank stares, “That doesn’t make me feel better,” Dean sighed and started driving toward the motel. “Do I have to?”

Sasha looked down at her hands, “No, but I would love it if both of you came with me.” Sam smiled at her and nodded, then they both looked at Dean. “Think about it, Dean. Beer and hot chicks. What could be better?”

Dean sighed and thought about it, then finally agreed to go, knowing it would make Sasha’s day if both of them went with her. “Alright, you convinced me. Just don’t be all fan-girl, okay?” Sasha promised him then told them the concert was in a couple of hours. The three of them went to dinner and relaxed at the motel for a bit before they started to get ready to make the trip to Dallas. Sasha couldn’t contain her excitement inside as she sat in the back seat, texting with Amanda.

S: Hey Amanda, just thought you might want to know I’m in Dallas and bought a ticket to the concert. I would really love to see you tomorrow if you have time before you leave town. I miss you so much and would love to catch up. Let me know. Don’t worry, Sam and Dean don’t know I’m going to the concert or that you’re even here.

Okay, so she lied, but she knew that Amanda wouldn’t see her if she knew Sam and Dean were with her. For a few minutes, Sasha just looked out the window as the Dallas skyline came into view; she realized this could go extremely well or very, very badly. She was willing to take the risk, though. Dean and Amanda were meant for each other; it was just bad timing. Even now might not be the time, but she hated that they still hadn’t talked to each other since that night.

As they parked and made their way inside the arena, Sasha got nervous as she studied Dean’s expression. He still had no idea Amanda was here; and she was hoping to keep it that way until Amanda took the stage. Maybe if he just heard her songs; he wouldn’t be angry. He would hopefully miss everything they used to have, even though it hadn’t lasted long.

Their seats weren’t extremely close to the stage, but close enough that if Amanda looked hard enough, she could see them. Sasha wasn’t expecting that to happen, but it would be awful if it did. She could tell this wasn’t Dean’s scene, but he started to act better when Sam brought the three of them a beer. He took a long swig of it and set it in the cup holder, then took a seat when the lights started to go out. He heard a piano melody start, then the applause; and then he heard a voice. Slowly, he turned his head to Sasha, who was conveniently seated on the other side of Sam, with her head on his shoulder. Sam’s eyes went wide as he realized who was on that stage, and his head turned toward his brother who had an extremely angry look on his face.

Well she was precious, like a flower
She grew wild, wild and innocent
A perfect prayer in a desperate hour
She was everything beautiful and different

Stupid boy, you can’t fence that in
Stupid boy, it’s like holding back the wind

She let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice
And that’s what happens when the only voice she hears
Is telling her that she can’t
Stupid boy

So what made you think you could take a life
And just push it, push it around
I guess to build yourself up so high
You had to take her and break her down

She let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice
And that’s what happens when the only voice she hears
Is telling her that she can’t
You stupid boy

Oh, you always had to be right
But now you’ve lost the only thing that ever
Made you feel alive

Well she let her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice
And that’s what happens when the only voice she hears
Is telling her that she can’t
You stupid boy

He’s the same old, same old stupid boy

It took a while for her to figure out
She could run, but when she did
She was long gone, long gone

As the audience erupted in applause, Dean looked down at his hands. He couldn’t believe Sasha had tricked him into this. He should have known she would eventually do something like this, but he couldn’t be angry at her. The only person he was angry at was himself. Sasha and Sam tried to get him to stay as he stood up, but Dean had to get away from them for a minute and think. The tears were about to fall and he didn’t know how much longer he could hold them in. “Sasha, I’m not angry at you, just…” Dean let one fall. “Just let me get some fresh air for a minute. I’ll come back, I promise.”

“Alright guys,” Amanda addressed the audience with a smile, “I’m so excited all of you could make it out here tonight. I have a little surprise for you. I’m going to have Blake come out here and sing one of his songs with me. A song that is very special to me.” Dean stopped and turned around as he was almost to the top of the steps. He figured he might as well stay for this one. He still cared about her, that was obvious. He just didn’t know if he could handle watching her be this happy without him. “This song is called ‘Just A Fool’. Now, I’m no Christina Aguilera, but I’m gonna try.” She laughed and Dean almost went weak at the knees. That laugh was toxic. “Sing along if you know it.”

Another shot of whiskey please, bartender
Keep it comin’ ‘till I don’t remember at all
How bad it hurts when you’re gone

Turn the music up a little bit louder
Just gotta get past the midnight hour
Maybe tomorrow it won’t be this hard

Who am I kidding?
I know what I’m missing

I, I had my heart set on you
But nothing else hurts like you do
Who knew that love was so cruel
Yeah, yeah, yeah

And I waited and waited so long
For someone who’d never come home
It’s my fault to think you’d be true
Yeah, yeah
I’m just a fool

Amanda stepped back from the microphone as she played her guitar and smiled over at Blake as he started to sing. She looked over the audience and panned across the lower level, then her eyes widened as her focused turned toward him walking down the steps slowly with tears in his eyes. She had gotten Sasha’s text and didn’t believe it for a minute when she said Sam and Dean weren’t going to come with her. So she tried to prepare for this. But during this song? This was too much for her. Thankfully, this was her last song and she could go hide for the rest of the night. She wasn’t prepared to see Dean again. Then she realized she had to sing again.

But who am I kidding?
I know what I’m missing

I, I had my heart set on you
But nothing else hurts like you do
Who knew that love was so cruel
Yeah, yeah, yeah

And I waited and waited so long
For someone who’d never come home
It’s my fault to think you’d be true
I’m just a fool

For holding onto something that’s
Never ever gonna come back
I can’t accept that it’s lost

I should’ve let it go
Held my tongue
Kept my big mouth shut
‘Cause now everything is just wrong, wrong, wrong

I’m just a fool
A fool for you
I’m just a fool

Amanda had tears in her eyes as they finished out the song and she said her thank-you’s and good-bye’s, then left the stage quickly, running toward her tour bus. She had guessed Sasha had already found out where the buses were, because she could hear name being called in the distance. As she stopped and looked toward the gate, she saw Sasha and Sam standing behind a security guard who was holding them back. Sasha was jumping up and down. “Amanda! Tell this man to let me through!”

She couldn’t help but laugh lightly, and she waved the security guard to let them through as she wiped her tears away. She didn’t see Dean, but could imagine he didn’t want to tag along with them. “Hey, Sasha,” She said happily as she embraced her, letting a few tears fall. “I missed you so much.”

Sasha cried as well, “I missed you too, Amanda. So did Sam. And Dean. But he won’t admit it.”

“You’re silly,” Amanda laughed lightly and led Sam and Sasha into her bus, then got them both a beer. Then they stepped back out of the bus and sat in the fold-up chairs Amanda had set outside. Then she did something she hadn’t done since her parents died. She lit a cigarette and wiped a few more tears. “I thought you said he wasn’t going to be here.”

“To be fair I also said Sam wasn’t going to be here,” Sasha shrugged. “I’m sorry, Amanda. But we all miss you. And we’re all so happy for you, you know? Well Sam didn’t find out until just now; he had never heard your songs on the radio or anything. But Dean finally admitted to me that he had heard one a few weeks ago. He didn’t take it very well. But I know he’s happy for you. Deep down. Somewhere.”

“Listen, Sasha. Dean and I didn’t end on very good terms, and I don’t think we will ever be what we were again,” Amanda shrugged. “We have two completely different lives. It just wouldn’t work. I appreciate that you did all of this to try, but it’s probably not the best idea if Dean and I see each other. I’m sorry.”

Sasha rolled her eyes, “You are the two stubbornest people I have ever met in my life, do you know that?”

Sam laughed, “Well, we won’t force you to do anything, Amanda. But you never know; it might be worth a shot.”

Amanda shrugged, “I don’t know. Right now I’m really tired. Just – tell Dean I said hello, okay? If you all want to come by the hotel we’re staying at, it’s the Hilton. Room 1327. Just let me know you’re coming, okay?”

Sasha nodded and stood up along with Sam. They said their goodbye’s and head back toward the Impala, Sasha with a disappointed look on her face. Sam put his arm around her and kissed her head, “You tried, babe. That’s all that matters.”

“It just sucks, you know? They’re perfect for each other.”

“In your eyes, yes,” He said, looking down at her. “But they might not see it that way.”

About two hours later, Amanda was on her way to the hotel and the first thing she wanted to do was go to the bar and have a drink; a stiff one. This had been too much for her. As she entered the hotel, she looked to her left and smiled as her eyes laid on all the bottles of liquor in front of her. She sat down on a stool and ordered a shot of Fireball and a bourbon and Coke. She put it on her room tab and quickly took the shot, feeling relief as the cinnamon liquor ran down her throat. As she sipped on her mixed drink, she heard the start of an argument on the other side of the restaurant. She turned her head around and saw a waiter standing over a man sitting at the booth.

“I’m sorry, sir, but we have to cut you off,” The waiter said sternly, then walked away as the man hung his head and slammed his fists on the table. “Sir, if you don’t leave I’m going to call security.”

As the man stood up, Amanda quickly realized it was Dean that was being cut off. She sighed heavily wondering if her night could get any worse. She saw the security guards starting to walk toward him and she made a last minute decision to save his ass, even though she wasn’t sure she wanted to do it. She quickly walked over to the three of them and grabbed Dean’s arm. “I’m sorry, gentleman; he’s with me. I promise I’ll take him up to our room and he won’t cause any more trouble.” They nodded and got out of their way. Dean huffed as Amanda pulled him across the lobby. “Dean, what are you doing here?” She asked angrily as he resisted her grip on him.

“Nothing,” He growled. “Would you let me go? I get a cab, I promise.”

“Oh no you don’t,” She warned, pulling him toward the elevator. “How did you know where I was staying?”

He sighed, “I heard your conversation with Sam and Sasha.” He was more calm now as they stood in the elevator, going up thirteen floors.

“Is there a reason you’re piss drunk?” Amanda rolled her eyes as she watched Dean having trouble standing upright.

He smirked, “Same reason you smell like smoke.” Amanda look down and nodded lightly. “Look, I’ll sober up a bit and then I’ll be out of your way, I promise. I just need a bit of water.”

Amanda scoffed as she opened the door to her hotel room, “Dean, you came here for a reason.”

Dean leaned on the wall as he watched Amanda take off her heels. She hadn’t changed much. She had on nicer clothes, but her hair was still the same color and length she had always had it. She looked more toned, like she had been working out more; but Dean wasn’t focused on that. The light that was usually in her eyes wasn’t there. He suddenly realized she wasn’t as happy as he thought she was. “I just wanted to tell you how happy I am that you’re living out your dream, Amanda. Really. I am.”

Amanda smiled lightly and turned toward him, “Thank you.” For a minute, there was silence as Amanda took off her jewelry. “So, what did you think?”

Dean finally sat down and tried to think of words to say to her. Finally, he looked up at her with a smile, “I think that I wish I had been to every one of your other concerts.” Amanda blushed and sat down next to him. “Did your parents finally come around?” He nudged her and his smile faded as Amanda lowered her head. “They didn’t, did they?”

Amanda shook her head, “It’s not that. They were actually really proud of me,” She started, letting a few tears fall. Dean didn’t like where this was going. “Dean, my parents died in a car accident six months ago.”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. All this time, Amanda had no family or friends, unless she had made some on tour. And here he was, being angry at her over a stupid argument that had happened a year ago. “Why didn’t you call me? Or Sasha? Or hell, even Sam?”

She shrugged, “I don’t know, Dean. My career was just starting to get bigger and after how things ended with us, I just – I just needed to cope in my own way, you know? I probably should have called Sasha at least. I do feel bad about that.”

“About that,” Dean started, looking over at her. “I just want to say I’m sorry about how things ended. That’s not what I wanted, at all, and you know that. I cared about you so much, Amanda. Even though we only knew each other a short time; it was enough time for me to…” He stopped and Amanda looked up at him. “I still care about you, Amanda. I just want you to know you can always talk to me, okay? Even if we’re not a couple, I want to be there for you. Because you deserve to have people that are there for you.”

Amanda had tears in her eyes, “I’m sorry, too, Dean. I never meant for us to hate each other or anything. I just had some loose strings to tie up.”

“I wasn’t finished,” Dean took in a deep breath and gently grabbed Amanda’s hand. “I was saying…I know we only knew each other for a short time, but it was long enough for me to fall in love with you. And even when I left and you didn’t come with me; even a year later, I’m in love with you, Amanda.”

Amanda was crying at this point, not knowing what to do. “Dean, I just don’t see how we can make this work. I’m going to be on the road nine months out of the year and you’re pretty much on call every single day.”

“Do you love me, Amanda?” He was looking at her, holding on to every bit of hope he had left in him. She didn’t say anything, “Answer the question, Amanda.”

“You’re drunk, Dean,” Amanda shook her head, letting more tears fall. “You’ll wake up tomorrow and not remember any of this.”

“I am fully aware of what I’m saying to you, Amanda,” She had never seen him so serious before. “Now answer the question.”

Amanda sat in silence for a minute, then shook her head, “No, Dean…I don’t love you.”

He sighed in frustration, “You’re lying, I know it. I saw the look on your face when you saw me in the crowd. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.” Amanda didn’t say anything, “You are so stubborn, has anyone ever told you that? And you’re a pain in the ass, too.” She shook her head and wiped the tears from her cheeks, not making eye contact with him, “Quit lying, Amanda.”

Amanda stood up and started to walk away from him, but he stood up and grabbed her elbow, just like he had a year ago, then turned her around toward him. “Dean,” She started, but he cut her off with a kiss and grabbed her head so she couldn’t pull away. For a second, Amanda tried to push him off her, but she eventually gave up and relaxed in his arms, deepening the kiss. Dean didn’t waste a minute and pushed her onto the bed behind her and brushed some hair out of her face as he towered over top of her. “Dammit, Dean.”