And I Would Walk Five-Hundred Miles

“Ugh. Where is he?”

I mumbled this to myself as I waited at the terminal. It had been almost a year since I had seen my best friend. He was taking off another two weeks to visit me this year, but this time it was during May. He said he wanted to spend my birthday with me.

Actually this particular day was my birthday, and I stood at a crowded terminal with my impatience getting the best of me. I breathed heavily, and when I saw the plane land, I felt my heart jump and start beating double time. Every single second turned into an everlasting eternity. I saw the steady stream of people begin to emerge, and the people that had been waiting around me walked up to meet their family or friends. I saw sisters being reunited. I saw a family of four, a mother, a father, a son, and a daughter, cheerfully step out, “ready for adventures galore,” as the father put it.

There were fewer and fewer people trickling out of the terminal. I began to think that Micah was hurt, or they were keeping him on the plane. Maybe he missed the flight; maybe he missed the connection. Maybe he just didn’t want to see me. Maybe he was too upset with me after the events of the last trip and the events of the past year in general. I could barely breathe, and right as my heart began to speed up to quadruple time and I began to panic, he emerged.

It became a rush of emotion.

But let’s hold on a second. I think it is only right you know what’s happened during the course of the past year that led to me become a ball of emotions at the terminal.

After that first day in Paris, Micah and I decided it would be better to maintain a friendship with each other. We had fun during the rest of his stay. We saw a bunch of tourist spots, reminisced on school days past, and enjoyed each other’s company. Leaving was really hard on me. We both decided that we would pursue relationships where we lived if the situation arose. I secretly hoped that he wouldn’t date anyone. I mean, just because I didn’t know what I wanted didn’t mean he needed to go off and get with any other girl or, even worse, Bella again. But there really wasn’t any other way for things to work out. He was way too far away to try and make things work. I already missed him unbearably when he was in America and single. Imagine me being with him! I would be a nervous wreck!

So within about 3 months, Micah got back together with Bella, but he never convinced me that he actually wanted to be with her. He was miserable all of the time. He was always in some sort of argument with her. More than once, he told me he didn’t trust her one bit. But then when you brought up the question of why he was with her, he could never answer. He just said they had history, but in my opinion it was more of a history of mistrust and pain than one of happiness and joy.

So it is only natural that I took his getting back together with Bella as a personal attack. Dan had been flirting with me, and it was obvious he really did want to start something with me. I figured Micah did not have a clue as to what he really wanted, and I could not stay there holding onto the little shard of hope that remained in my heart. I decided that Daniel did like me, and I might be restricting myself if I didn’t at least try with him.

Micah was hurt when I told him Daniel and I were going out. He didn’t seem too enthusiastic about the idea of me going out with a famous actor. He said it would draw way too much attention to me. He told me that my privacy could and possibly would be at stake, and he didn’t want me to start a relationship that was rooted purely in lust. I retaliated, saying that he was the one going out with a girl who constantly cheated on him. He got really angry at me, but what happened next was the shocking thing. He broke up with her the very next day.

When I asked him why, he just told me I knew why.

It broke my heart to know she had cheated on him once again, but it wasn’t like I hadn’t warned him before.

Dan and I had a sweet relationship, but it did tend to be boring. No, the make out sessions were not boring in the least, but the conversations were. We got along, but we didn’t have many things in common. The relationship lasted 6 months, surprisingly long. Never was my privacy compromised, and we did remain friends after the whole thing. Why we broke up, you ask? We didn’t have anything beyond a physical connection, which too faded over time. The one thing Daniel did say when we broke up was that there was a guy who did love me, a guy who did have emotional, physical, and mental attraction with me. He told me that I needed to rework things with Micah, because as far as he knew, Micah was my soul mate. Thing is, I needed to know that too.

I did know.

I’ve always known.

I think both of us have just been too scared to admit it.

So back to the terminal.

Micah looked just as I had remembered him. He was just as handsome, just as perfect. But there seemed to be an air of sadness and anxiousness to him. He looked down, walking slowly.

He didn’t know I was going to be there. It was supposed to be a surprise. I had told him I wouldn’t be able to pick him up and to take a taxi to my place.

When he did look up, he saw me. He instantly froze, rooted to the floor. I cracked a very weak smile at him. He tried to move his mouth, but just ended up tilting his head down, as if he had meant his jaw, but his jaw wouldn’t function at that moment. I took slow and cautious steps towards him until I just broke out into a run, smacking myself into him. I hugged him so tightly, and I began to cry. I clutched him tightly to my body, my heart beating erratically, my breathing haggard, my bawling uncontrollable. I kissed his cheek forcefully and pulled away to see that tears had welled up in his own eyes. We stared at each other for a moment, and he pulled me to his body once more.

Reunited, and it never felt so good.