And Love Said No
Part Two
“Strike out again, did you?” Jyrki asked as his bandmate took the empty seat next to him.
“No, I lost interest.” Jussi groaned. “She was too dull to hold a conversation.”
“Is that what they’re calling it these days?” Mige quipped.
“Face it, you’re getting too old to pull this shit on 20-somethings.” Ville chimed in.
“Ah, whatever. You lot are not ones to talk, settling in with your ladies when you haven’t even reached your prime.”
“There’s a phrase for what you’re going through.” Mige said.
“Yeah, what’s that?” he mocked.
“Mid-life crisis.”
“Motherfucker.” Jussi grinned.
“I’m gonna out for a smoke.”
“I’ll join you.” he stood and muttered. “Maybe these pussies will lighten up while we’re gone.”
The two brushed past the crowd and aimed for fresh air. Jussi led them to the alleyway, and they pulled out their cigarettes.
After patting himself down, he asked, “Can I borrow a light?”
“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Ville stuffed his left hand in his pocket and pulled out the contents. He fingered through the rubbish and Jussi recognized a ring even in the dim lighting. He masked his shock as Ville looked up, having found his lighter.
“Thanks.” He lit his cigarette and took a long drag. Jussi handed the lighter back. “So how’s everything going?”
“Good…Well, they’re okay.” He breathed sharply. “The past few shows haven’t been my best, and I don’t know… something is off. Haven’t been writing much of anything either. “
“Ah, well, it’s just a creative lull. Take a solid break now that you have the time. Before you know it, you’ll be back to crooning your heart out, and the girls will be all over you.”
“Yeah, let’s hope so. We start up again in Germany in like a week and a half, so I have to find the rhythm by then.” Ville said. “Anyway, how are things with you?”
He shrugged. “Can’t complain. We’re working on the next album, some days are better than others. You know how it is. Oh, have you heard Ozzy Osbourne’s new record?”
“The Prince of Darkness. Nah, I haven’t gotten the chance to get the album yet, and I can’t listen to it on an mp3. That’s sacrilege.”
“Fanboy.” He muttered under his breath.
Ville chuckled. “It’s true.”
“Um, I gotta go…” Jussi trailed off with a smirk. “I spot a hot blonde.”
“Yeah, I’m gonna head back inside, too. Have some mercy on the poor woman, will you?”
“Ah, shut it!” Jussi called after him.
He pretended to wander to someone but ducked around the corner of the pub when he confirmed that Ville wasn’t looking. He had engaged in some small talk with Ville, but all he had wanted to do was check on his cousin.
Esme answered on the second ring. “Hey, Jus.”
“Why aren’t you wearing your engagement ring?” Jussi replied, skipping the pleasantries altogether.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“Explain why I just saw your beautiful, and might I add expensive, ring in Ville’s possession.”
Esme sighed. “We sort of broke up.”
“You did what? Where are you now?” He deadpanned.
“Lakis Hotel. Room 335.” She knew there was no point in protesting.
“I’ll see you in 20.” He hung up.
Esme pushed her computer off her lap and climbed out of bed. Though she didn’t have the energy to make herself presentable, she decided to wash her face to freshen up. She pat her skin dry before walking over to her suitcase to shut it. She was a bit disheveled, but there was no reason for her cousin to get a glimpse of her delicates.
There was a knock at the door and Esme put her hair in a high ponytail as she went to answer it.
“Beer for me, wine for you.” he lifted his hands to show her.
She smiled weakly. “Thank you.”
Jussi hugged her with his wine-carrying arm, and they walked to the bed. She used the corkscrew on the bedside table to open the bottle before she settled against the headboard. She poured some wine into a glass.
“What are you doing staying in a hotel anyway? You know you could have just come over to my place.”
“I’d rather not have awkward run-ins with the flavor of the week, but thanks.”
Jussi rolled his eyes and sat beside her on the bed. “So… what happened, Es?”
“I don’t know, Jus.” She sighed and sipped her wine. “I thought… I thought we were just having an argument. It was stupid, but I thought that’s all it was.”
“Arguing about what?”
“The wedding. We were trying to set a date. I said that we should have it this year because once my book comes out, I’ll be on the go. He said that he’s in the middle of festival season, and I don’t know. It was just a bunch of nonsense. He wanted to delay, I don’t know why.”
“I don’t understand why you would break up over that.”
“No, it wasn’t that. We couldn’t agree on anything about the wedding: the date, venue, nothing. Anyway, it escalated and somehow we started fighting about other stupid shit. Like little things that don’t matter. I just got fed up with the bullshit, so I packed a bag and went to Nana’s. I was only gone for a few days, and when I came home last week I saw that he…” Esme chewed her bottom lip. “I just left because I needed some space, but I would never have imagined–” her voice broke.
“What did he do?” his jaw tightened.
“I walked in the bedroom to find that he–Jussi, he was in bed with Jonna.” He nearly choked on his beer. “Yeah, that sounds about right. I can’t understand it. I don’t get why that conversation took him there… to her.” She looked at him with tear-filled eyes. “What did I do wrong?”
Jussi closed the gap and embraced her. “Oh, Essie. It’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He consoled as he gently rubbed her back.
“Then why did he do this?”
He sighed. “Wish I knew, really.”
They sat like that for a few minutes as he soothed her sobs. She held him tightly, but she didn’t have many tears left.
“You smell like cheap cologne,” she said as she pulled away.
“Yeah, well you don’t look so hot either.”
She cracked a smile. “I’m going to LA.”
“What? When?”
“I fly out tomorrow morning.”
“If I hadn’t shown up here, would you have told me any of this?” he asked.
“Just for a little bit. I need to get away, Jus. He’s–He’s everywhere.”
“Go to LA and then what?”
“And then… I’ll work on my book. Get that published, go on my book tour. Hopefully enough time will have passed by then that I can get my stuff from the tower… Be on my merry way.”
“Just like that?”
Esme swallowed hard. “Yep. Just like that.”
“No, I lost interest.” Jussi groaned. “She was too dull to hold a conversation.”
“Is that what they’re calling it these days?” Mige quipped.
“Face it, you’re getting too old to pull this shit on 20-somethings.” Ville chimed in.
“Ah, whatever. You lot are not ones to talk, settling in with your ladies when you haven’t even reached your prime.”
“There’s a phrase for what you’re going through.” Mige said.
“Yeah, what’s that?” he mocked.
“Mid-life crisis.”
“Motherfucker.” Jussi grinned.
“I’m gonna out for a smoke.”
“I’ll join you.” he stood and muttered. “Maybe these pussies will lighten up while we’re gone.”
The two brushed past the crowd and aimed for fresh air. Jussi led them to the alleyway, and they pulled out their cigarettes.
After patting himself down, he asked, “Can I borrow a light?”
“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Ville stuffed his left hand in his pocket and pulled out the contents. He fingered through the rubbish and Jussi recognized a ring even in the dim lighting. He masked his shock as Ville looked up, having found his lighter.
“Thanks.” He lit his cigarette and took a long drag. Jussi handed the lighter back. “So how’s everything going?”
“Good…Well, they’re okay.” He breathed sharply. “The past few shows haven’t been my best, and I don’t know… something is off. Haven’t been writing much of anything either. “
“Ah, well, it’s just a creative lull. Take a solid break now that you have the time. Before you know it, you’ll be back to crooning your heart out, and the girls will be all over you.”
“Yeah, let’s hope so. We start up again in Germany in like a week and a half, so I have to find the rhythm by then.” Ville said. “Anyway, how are things with you?”
He shrugged. “Can’t complain. We’re working on the next album, some days are better than others. You know how it is. Oh, have you heard Ozzy Osbourne’s new record?”
“The Prince of Darkness. Nah, I haven’t gotten the chance to get the album yet, and I can’t listen to it on an mp3. That’s sacrilege.”
“Fanboy.” He muttered under his breath.
Ville chuckled. “It’s true.”
“Um, I gotta go…” Jussi trailed off with a smirk. “I spot a hot blonde.”
“Yeah, I’m gonna head back inside, too. Have some mercy on the poor woman, will you?”
“Ah, shut it!” Jussi called after him.
He pretended to wander to someone but ducked around the corner of the pub when he confirmed that Ville wasn’t looking. He had engaged in some small talk with Ville, but all he had wanted to do was check on his cousin.
Esme answered on the second ring. “Hey, Jus.”
“Why aren’t you wearing your engagement ring?” Jussi replied, skipping the pleasantries altogether.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“Explain why I just saw your beautiful, and might I add expensive, ring in Ville’s possession.”
Esme sighed. “We sort of broke up.”
“You did what? Where are you now?” He deadpanned.
“Lakis Hotel. Room 335.” She knew there was no point in protesting.
“I’ll see you in 20.” He hung up.
Esme pushed her computer off her lap and climbed out of bed. Though she didn’t have the energy to make herself presentable, she decided to wash her face to freshen up. She pat her skin dry before walking over to her suitcase to shut it. She was a bit disheveled, but there was no reason for her cousin to get a glimpse of her delicates.
There was a knock at the door and Esme put her hair in a high ponytail as she went to answer it.
“Beer for me, wine for you.” he lifted his hands to show her.
She smiled weakly. “Thank you.”
Jussi hugged her with his wine-carrying arm, and they walked to the bed. She used the corkscrew on the bedside table to open the bottle before she settled against the headboard. She poured some wine into a glass.
“What are you doing staying in a hotel anyway? You know you could have just come over to my place.”
“I’d rather not have awkward run-ins with the flavor of the week, but thanks.”
Jussi rolled his eyes and sat beside her on the bed. “So… what happened, Es?”
“I don’t know, Jus.” She sighed and sipped her wine. “I thought… I thought we were just having an argument. It was stupid, but I thought that’s all it was.”
“Arguing about what?”
“The wedding. We were trying to set a date. I said that we should have it this year because once my book comes out, I’ll be on the go. He said that he’s in the middle of festival season, and I don’t know. It was just a bunch of nonsense. He wanted to delay, I don’t know why.”
“I don’t understand why you would break up over that.”
“No, it wasn’t that. We couldn’t agree on anything about the wedding: the date, venue, nothing. Anyway, it escalated and somehow we started fighting about other stupid shit. Like little things that don’t matter. I just got fed up with the bullshit, so I packed a bag and went to Nana’s. I was only gone for a few days, and when I came home last week I saw that he…” Esme chewed her bottom lip. “I just left because I needed some space, but I would never have imagined–” her voice broke.
“What did he do?” his jaw tightened.
“I walked in the bedroom to find that he–Jussi, he was in bed with Jonna.” He nearly choked on his beer. “Yeah, that sounds about right. I can’t understand it. I don’t get why that conversation took him there… to her.” She looked at him with tear-filled eyes. “What did I do wrong?”
Jussi closed the gap and embraced her. “Oh, Essie. It’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He consoled as he gently rubbed her back.
“Then why did he do this?”
He sighed. “Wish I knew, really.”
They sat like that for a few minutes as he soothed her sobs. She held him tightly, but she didn’t have many tears left.
“You smell like cheap cologne,” she said as she pulled away.
“Yeah, well you don’t look so hot either.”
She cracked a smile. “I’m going to LA.”
“What? When?”
“I fly out tomorrow morning.”
“If I hadn’t shown up here, would you have told me any of this?” he asked.
“Just for a little bit. I need to get away, Jus. He’s–He’s everywhere.”
“Go to LA and then what?”
“And then… I’ll work on my book. Get that published, go on my book tour. Hopefully enough time will have passed by then that I can get my stuff from the tower… Be on my merry way.”
“Just like that?”
Esme swallowed hard. “Yep. Just like that.”