Status: Active c:
I'm Not Insane
Nine.
---- The day of the party ----
I didn't hear from Brian at all yesterday, so I took that as bad news. If he was the father of Ashley's baby, he probably wouldn't really speak to me anymore. I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror. Halie had convinced me to dress nice, and she even curled my hair and did my makeup for me. I was wearing a skin tight black dress that came down to a little above my knees. It showed off every curve on my body, and it made me a little uncomfortable. I was a little pear shaped. She also had me wearing shoes that I was sure I would break my ankle in, but as I looked at myself in the mirror, I had to admit that I looked really pretty. I smoothed out the fabric of my dress with my palms nervously and Halie came into my room, grinning from ear to ear. "You look fucking hot." I snorted, rolling my eyes at her. "Shut up, Halie. Are you almost ready to go? I really just want to get this over with. You know I hate birthday parties." She nodded, putting an earring in her left ear. "Yeah, I just gotta put my shoes on and grab your presents." I shot daggers at her with my eyes, "I thought we agreed no presents." She giggled, biting her lip, "Oops." I rolled my eyes again, grabbing a cardigan from my closet and slipping it on. Once I had it buttoned up, I felt a little more comfortable. "You're not wearing that all night you know. Just until we get there." She told me, pointing at it. I shrugged, my hands clinging to the fabric.
-----
When we arrived I noticed that Brian's car was in the driveway ahead of mine, and I hesitated before getting out of the car. Halie noticed and put her hand on my leg gently. "Don't let him get to you. I know you're worried about it, but everything happens for a reason." I sighed, smiling softly at her before getting out of the Jeep slowly and heading towards the house. Halie just walked right in, and I followed her, seeing streamers and balloons everywhere. I bit my lip to hide my smile. They had gone all out. There was a banner hanging on the wall above the kitchen door that read 'Happy Birthday Luna' in cursive lettering, and I could smell food being made. I also noticed that there was a small pile of presents on the coffee table, and one large present leaning against it. I felt my stomach tie into a knot. I told them not to get me anything.. I was torn from my thoughts when Jimmy enveloped me in a tight hug. "Happy birthday!" He shrieked and I laughed at him, hugging him back gently. "Thank you, Jimmy. It looks wonderful in here." He pulled away, making a face at me. "What is this?" He asked, pulling on my cardigan. I shrugged, "I-I was kinda cold when we left the house and.." Jimmy cut me off by unbuttoning the cardigan and practically ripping it off of me. His jaw dropped slightly when he saw what I was wearing underneath and I wrapped my arms around myself. "Holy shit." He whispered, and I felt my face heat up. He stared at me for awhile, until Zacky came over and slapped him on the back of the head. "Quit drooling, will you? You're making her uncomfortable." I smiled at Zacky as a thank you and he hugged me lightly. "Happy birthday." He told me. "Thank you, Zacky."
They led me over to the back door, covering my eyes. Apparently I wasn't allowed to see what was going on in the kitchen quite yet. Once I was seated at the table outside, Zacky went inside to get me a beer and Jimmy ran after him, saying something about shots. I laughed and shook my head as I watched them walk away. Suddenly, Brian appeared in the doorway and I adverted my gaze quickly. He looked nice. He was wearing black jeans and a black button up shirt with the top 3 buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up. His hair looked like he had just rolled out of bed, but in the best way, and it made my mouth dry. I tried to focus my attention on the table, hoping that he wouldn't come over, but soon enough, I heard his footsteps approach me. "Hi." He said softly. I stood up, smiling at him, "Hey." I practically whispered. "You uh.. You look beautiful." He told me, wrapping me in an awkward hug. "Oh, thank you." I replied nervously, loving the feeling of being in his arms. "You look nice too." He smiled, holding onto me a little longer than he should've. "How's your day going so far?" He asked me, and I shrugged. "I mean, I'm not really a birthday person, but all of this is really nice. I appreciate it, a lot." He bit his lip as he stared at me, like he was trying to figure me out. I gulped, sitting back down in my chair and wringing my hands together.
Zacky brought a few drinks out to the table, interrupting my time with Brian, and Jimmy soon followed, holding a bottle of tequila and four shot glasses. "Tequilaaaaa!" He yelled as he reached the table, causing me to laugh. "I don't want too much, Jimmy. I haven't even eaten yet." He nodded, "Only one shot until you eat something, got it." I smiled at him as he poured the shot, handing it to me. I swallowed it down quickly as Brian sat next to me. "So, Brian, how does it feel to know you're not the father?" Jimmy asked, and I almost choked, but I covered it up by coughing. Brian smiled at me slightly, "Well, it's nice. But it also kinda sucks. Just further proves that she really did cheat on me. I feel sorry for the guy." His eyes flashed to me again, almost like he was waiting for a reaction from me, but I kept my attention on the table in front of me. "Are you two going to stay together then?" Zacky asked him, and Brian shook his head slowly. "No, when she found out who the father was yesterday, I told her to fuck off." I stifled a giggle, and bit my lip so I wouldn't smile, but Brian seemed to notice, because his smile grew. I took a sip of my beer, still trying to keep my eyes anywhere but him. "What about you, Luna? Any boyfriends we should worry about?" Zacky asked, a smirk on his face. I laughed awkwardly, tucking my hair behind my ear. "Trust me, you'll probably never have to worry about that. I think my total lack of allure shot that horse in the face." Zacky laughed and I saw him elbow Brian, who was smiling to himself. "Have you had a lot of boyfriends?" Jimmy asked, coming closer to me. "I bet you have, you're so pretty." I shook my head, feeling myself blush again. "N-no, not really.. I had a boyfriend my senior year of high school, but not since then.. So it's been about.. 6 years.." I paused, toying with my hair. "Guys don't usually like me." I whispered. Brian's face turned to one of confusion. "What do you mean? You're practically perfect." He blurted out, and my blush grew deeper. "I uh.. Most guys I've been on dates with just wanted one thing.. And I'm really not that kinda girl.. So.. Yeah.." I stammered, standing up quickly. "I'm uh.. I'm gonna use the bathroom." I excused myself nervously, practically running into the house.
When I reached the bathroom, I locked the door behind me, leaning against the counter and breathing deeply to try and calm myself. I really didn't like it when people asked me questions about relationships. I didn't like to talk about Chris. I didn't like telling people how he had ruined my chances of being with someone over the past 6 years. How I couldn't let someone see me naked because all I could hear were his words. How the reason I was so insecure, so anxious, was because of what he did to me. I put my hand over my heart, feeling it pound against my chest like a hammer. I needed to calm down. I turned around, staring at myself in the bathroom mirror. "They're not him. They won't hurt you. They're not him." I kept repeating to myself over and over, until I heard a soft knock at the door, making me jump. "Luna?" It was Halie. I unlocked the door so she could come in and smiled sadly at her. "Brian told me you practically ran away from them when they asked if you had a boyfriend?" I shrugged, biting my lip. "Luna.. I thought you had gotten past this." She tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear gently. "Chris is gone. He can't hurt you ever again. These guys aren't him. Brian isn't Chris." I nodded slowly, sighing. "You gonna be okay?" I nodded again, smiling at her. "Yeah, I'm fine now. Thank you." She smiled at me, taking my hand in hers. "C'mon. It's time for presents."
I didn't hear from Brian at all yesterday, so I took that as bad news. If he was the father of Ashley's baby, he probably wouldn't really speak to me anymore. I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror. Halie had convinced me to dress nice, and she even curled my hair and did my makeup for me. I was wearing a skin tight black dress that came down to a little above my knees. It showed off every curve on my body, and it made me a little uncomfortable. I was a little pear shaped. She also had me wearing shoes that I was sure I would break my ankle in, but as I looked at myself in the mirror, I had to admit that I looked really pretty. I smoothed out the fabric of my dress with my palms nervously and Halie came into my room, grinning from ear to ear. "You look fucking hot." I snorted, rolling my eyes at her. "Shut up, Halie. Are you almost ready to go? I really just want to get this over with. You know I hate birthday parties." She nodded, putting an earring in her left ear. "Yeah, I just gotta put my shoes on and grab your presents." I shot daggers at her with my eyes, "I thought we agreed no presents." She giggled, biting her lip, "Oops." I rolled my eyes again, grabbing a cardigan from my closet and slipping it on. Once I had it buttoned up, I felt a little more comfortable. "You're not wearing that all night you know. Just until we get there." She told me, pointing at it. I shrugged, my hands clinging to the fabric.
-----
When we arrived I noticed that Brian's car was in the driveway ahead of mine, and I hesitated before getting out of the car. Halie noticed and put her hand on my leg gently. "Don't let him get to you. I know you're worried about it, but everything happens for a reason." I sighed, smiling softly at her before getting out of the Jeep slowly and heading towards the house. Halie just walked right in, and I followed her, seeing streamers and balloons everywhere. I bit my lip to hide my smile. They had gone all out. There was a banner hanging on the wall above the kitchen door that read 'Happy Birthday Luna' in cursive lettering, and I could smell food being made. I also noticed that there was a small pile of presents on the coffee table, and one large present leaning against it. I felt my stomach tie into a knot. I told them not to get me anything.. I was torn from my thoughts when Jimmy enveloped me in a tight hug. "Happy birthday!" He shrieked and I laughed at him, hugging him back gently. "Thank you, Jimmy. It looks wonderful in here." He pulled away, making a face at me. "What is this?" He asked, pulling on my cardigan. I shrugged, "I-I was kinda cold when we left the house and.." Jimmy cut me off by unbuttoning the cardigan and practically ripping it off of me. His jaw dropped slightly when he saw what I was wearing underneath and I wrapped my arms around myself. "Holy shit." He whispered, and I felt my face heat up. He stared at me for awhile, until Zacky came over and slapped him on the back of the head. "Quit drooling, will you? You're making her uncomfortable." I smiled at Zacky as a thank you and he hugged me lightly. "Happy birthday." He told me. "Thank you, Zacky."
They led me over to the back door, covering my eyes. Apparently I wasn't allowed to see what was going on in the kitchen quite yet. Once I was seated at the table outside, Zacky went inside to get me a beer and Jimmy ran after him, saying something about shots. I laughed and shook my head as I watched them walk away. Suddenly, Brian appeared in the doorway and I adverted my gaze quickly. He looked nice. He was wearing black jeans and a black button up shirt with the top 3 buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up. His hair looked like he had just rolled out of bed, but in the best way, and it made my mouth dry. I tried to focus my attention on the table, hoping that he wouldn't come over, but soon enough, I heard his footsteps approach me. "Hi." He said softly. I stood up, smiling at him, "Hey." I practically whispered. "You uh.. You look beautiful." He told me, wrapping me in an awkward hug. "Oh, thank you." I replied nervously, loving the feeling of being in his arms. "You look nice too." He smiled, holding onto me a little longer than he should've. "How's your day going so far?" He asked me, and I shrugged. "I mean, I'm not really a birthday person, but all of this is really nice. I appreciate it, a lot." He bit his lip as he stared at me, like he was trying to figure me out. I gulped, sitting back down in my chair and wringing my hands together.
Zacky brought a few drinks out to the table, interrupting my time with Brian, and Jimmy soon followed, holding a bottle of tequila and four shot glasses. "Tequilaaaaa!" He yelled as he reached the table, causing me to laugh. "I don't want too much, Jimmy. I haven't even eaten yet." He nodded, "Only one shot until you eat something, got it." I smiled at him as he poured the shot, handing it to me. I swallowed it down quickly as Brian sat next to me. "So, Brian, how does it feel to know you're not the father?" Jimmy asked, and I almost choked, but I covered it up by coughing. Brian smiled at me slightly, "Well, it's nice. But it also kinda sucks. Just further proves that she really did cheat on me. I feel sorry for the guy." His eyes flashed to me again, almost like he was waiting for a reaction from me, but I kept my attention on the table in front of me. "Are you two going to stay together then?" Zacky asked him, and Brian shook his head slowly. "No, when she found out who the father was yesterday, I told her to fuck off." I stifled a giggle, and bit my lip so I wouldn't smile, but Brian seemed to notice, because his smile grew. I took a sip of my beer, still trying to keep my eyes anywhere but him. "What about you, Luna? Any boyfriends we should worry about?" Zacky asked, a smirk on his face. I laughed awkwardly, tucking my hair behind my ear. "Trust me, you'll probably never have to worry about that. I think my total lack of allure shot that horse in the face." Zacky laughed and I saw him elbow Brian, who was smiling to himself. "Have you had a lot of boyfriends?" Jimmy asked, coming closer to me. "I bet you have, you're so pretty." I shook my head, feeling myself blush again. "N-no, not really.. I had a boyfriend my senior year of high school, but not since then.. So it's been about.. 6 years.." I paused, toying with my hair. "Guys don't usually like me." I whispered. Brian's face turned to one of confusion. "What do you mean? You're practically perfect." He blurted out, and my blush grew deeper. "I uh.. Most guys I've been on dates with just wanted one thing.. And I'm really not that kinda girl.. So.. Yeah.." I stammered, standing up quickly. "I'm uh.. I'm gonna use the bathroom." I excused myself nervously, practically running into the house.
When I reached the bathroom, I locked the door behind me, leaning against the counter and breathing deeply to try and calm myself. I really didn't like it when people asked me questions about relationships. I didn't like to talk about Chris. I didn't like telling people how he had ruined my chances of being with someone over the past 6 years. How I couldn't let someone see me naked because all I could hear were his words. How the reason I was so insecure, so anxious, was because of what he did to me. I put my hand over my heart, feeling it pound against my chest like a hammer. I needed to calm down. I turned around, staring at myself in the bathroom mirror. "They're not him. They won't hurt you. They're not him." I kept repeating to myself over and over, until I heard a soft knock at the door, making me jump. "Luna?" It was Halie. I unlocked the door so she could come in and smiled sadly at her. "Brian told me you practically ran away from them when they asked if you had a boyfriend?" I shrugged, biting my lip. "Luna.. I thought you had gotten past this." She tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear gently. "Chris is gone. He can't hurt you ever again. These guys aren't him. Brian isn't Chris." I nodded slowly, sighing. "You gonna be okay?" I nodded again, smiling at her. "Yeah, I'm fine now. Thank you." She smiled at me, taking my hand in hers. "C'mon. It's time for presents."