Angel of Yesterday

I didn't know how long I was huddle up in the cave, but it must have been for a while because the humid air started to get thin and cold. I must have spent the whole day in here at the most. And no one seemed to care to look for me. Until I heard footsteps, I didn't have anywhere to go, my hands went behind me to find something sticking out of the wall. It was sharp. I tugged and tugged until it finally came loose. I looked down at it, as my eyes got more used to the darkness, it was a sharp piece of crystal. I held it firmly in my hands waiting for whatever was coming. I lowered it a little bit, but not much when I saw it was the Crystal Gems. Garnet's hand looked perfectly fine, they must have gotten Sapphire to mom's fountain. I was happy for that.

Only thing that was bothering me, was they barely even came looking for me until now. I have been here all day, I liked the peacefulness, and the alone time, but did they even care for me at all? They never cared about my feelings I had towards Lapis. She was my family, and I wanted to save her. They didn't care. They thought I was going to get over it sooner or later. Maybe I should have trusted Lapis when I took her out of the mirror, maybe I should have gone with her, and ran away when I had a chance. They also blew me off when I asked about mom. Pearl hated my guts. Amethyst, I'm not sure what she really thought about me.

I lifted my shirt up, and pointed it right under my rib cage, just above my liver. “Do not come anyway closer, or I swear to the gods, I will do it.” I snapped at them making them stop in their tracks. “It took you all day to come find me. Do you even care? Was I just a burden to you all when mom died? When I was feeling like total crap because I couldn't save Lapis? Do you even care that I am slowly dying inside? Can't you see it?” Tears were streaming down my eyes as I spoke. I was dying inside.

Very slowly, and very painfully.

“Steven, we had no idea.” It was Pearl who spoke up first, I looked at her, and narrowed my eyes. My vision was getting blurry from the tears that were running down my face, my nose was running too, but it didn't really matter at the time. “If we had known you were so upset about the fact that Lapis had died, then we would have been there for you more.”

That was a plain at lie, I pushed the crystal against my skin, and I felt a prickling pain for a second. She was going to walk forward, but I pushed the crystal in more and felt hot blood run down my skin. Garnet laid a hand on Pearl to stop her advance forward. “That is bull crap. You knew how I was going through. I broke down multiple of times. And you know what? You were too selfish to care. You saw me slowly breaking down.” I sniffled and shook my head. “This is for the best. Maybe if I do this, then … then mom might come back. If she comes back then … then … Pearl will be happy again. Amethyst, will have someone to tell her that she is perfect the way she is. Garnet, she wouldn't have to stress anymore about being the leader of the Crystal Gems. Everything will go back too normal. Dad, will have mom back as well.”

“Steven! No!” Horror was written over Garnet's face, as I pushed the crystal in deep blood was in my hands in a matter of seconds. A smile was on my face even with the immense pain I was in. I dropped to my knees, and strong arms caught me. They belonged to Garnet, I knew for certain. “Why?” She asked, I felt tear drops drop down on my face from her three eyes.

“It was the best. Now, you can have … mom … back … and I can be with Lapis.” I coughed up blood, and groaned as I was picked up. I didn't want to go anywhere just let me die. My vision was getting distorted, and I had no idea what the voices surrounding me, were saying.

October 27th, 2015

48 days left

(A/N: I just put it ten extra days. Is all. xD Confusing I know. I had to keep doing my math.)

I woke up feeling heavy, like my whole body was made of nothing, but rock sinking down to the bottom of the ocean, and all the pressure of the water was weighing down on me. I groaned, trying to open my eyes, but my eyelids felt stapled shut. Was this how it felt like to be dead? I thought when you died, you were supposed to feel weightless, but I felt like total crap. I felt a hand on my forehead, and I groaned again. Then, someone opened my eyelids, and a bright light shined into it. Ugh, get that light out of my face. It was too bright. I tried to blink when the hand moved away, making me able to open my eyes once and for all. I blinked a couple of times trying to get used to the bright light and the brightness of the white walls surrounding me on all sides.

I tried to move, but a shot of pain ran through my body like a bolt of electricity. “He's awake, someone should get Greg. He will be happy to know that his son is alive.” It was a voice I didn't recognize. I was alive after all. When my vision was clear I was finally able to get a good look at my surroundings. The people who were around me was a female doctor, and Pearl. Why wasn't I dead? I should have died back there.

Pearl put my hair away from my eyes, so, she can look at me. “You had us worried there, Steven, we were so scared you wouldn't make it.” She kissed my forehead and that small gesture turned my cheeks pink. It felt nice that she was paying attention to me, and not accusing me of taking mom away from her. “I was so worried, Garnet, she could tell you I was freaking out the whole time. I couldn't go on missions at all.”

I mean I was happy that I was still alive, but at the same time, I wasn't. I knew this was all an act from Pearl, deep inside, she still blamed me, for everything. Blamed me for mom's death. She was hurting so much inside, like I was. Like I am still. “Have you been here the whole time?” I asked her, and she nodded her head. “Why?” She was kind of taken back with my question.

“Steven, I love you. We all love you. Without you the Crystal Gems would be incomplete.” Pearl kissed my forehead, before my dad came into the room. He ran over to me, his eyes were watering with tears.

He hugged me and I winced, as it was too hard. “Oh, I'm sorry, I am just so happy you are awake. Don't ever do that to me again!” I was starting to tear up, why did I have to make my dad worry about me so much? He was going through so much more pain than I was. And I was going to make him go through so much more than he needed to be. Even though I am hurting, I will try to hold on as much as I can, for my dad's sake. For Garnet's sake. For Amethyst's. I took a side glance at Pearl, for Pearl's sake. I will try to hold on as much as I can. I will help them track down Peridot.

Connie came to visit me when her mom came in for work, it was a Sunday so she couldn't stay long because of Violin practice. She was so happy to see me though, I was a little upset that I made her upset for so long. We hugged and she kissed my cheek, making me blush. The visit was pretty short, I had to apologize for not talking to her, and that she can come over when I get out of the hospital in two days. Then, she had to go. I was a little sad, but I was also very tired. Garnet and Amethyst were off on a mission and dad was back at the car wash, so it was just me and Pearl, until I drifted off to sleep again.

October 29th, 2015

46 days Left

I was released from the hospital today, October 29th, two days before Halloween. The gems never liked Halloween. They said it was a load of bull, and there was no such thing as the supernatural. Well, that's what Garnet, and Pearl says anyway, Amethyst on the other hand, actually loves going trick-or-treating because she can act like a human kid and get candy. My dad drove me home, to the temple where the gems were. I had to use one crutch because I couldn't stand on my own very well. Also, with every step I take hurt me so much.

When I was walking, I noticed three people were walking towards me, I stopped in my tracks as I noticed it was Jenny, Buck, and Sour Cream. “Steven! Steven!” called Jenny as she waved at me. I waved back with the arm that wasn't holding the crutch up.

Buck Dewy smiled a bit and nodded my way. “Yo!” He said, I nodded my head back at him, before taking his glasses off to inspect me more. “What happened to you, dawg?”

I looked down at my feet, “Aye, I got in a little accident is all.” I shrugged it off. I looked back up when I felt all their eyes on me, it was kind of uncomfortable to be honest. Then, Jenny started to speak up.

“Well, anyway, I am glad you are okay. And welcome back to Earth. I know it's a little late, but hey, we are all busy, yeah?” I was taken back about how she knew I actually went up to space.

“Wait! What? Who told you?” I asked.

“You looked a million miles away, man.” Buck had told me, and my cheeks were heating up. I was spacing out a bit there.

“Oh, heh heh. Sorry, I was zoning out.” I rubbed the back of my head a little embarrassed, but it seems like they didn't care because they started to talk again. Well, Buck anyway.

“We were about to go chill in the parking lot and freak out some squares.”

“You should come with.” Jenny said shortly afterwards.

“Oh, but I— I don't have anything against squares. I like all basic shapes.”

Buck started to chuckle and I kind of felt stupid about what I said to them. Should I have said something else, instead of that? “Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. You got that much-needed counterpart to our cynical world view. You have to come.”

Sour Cream then spoke up for the first time since they got here, and before I was able to say anything to them. “It's good energy flow.” he told me.

I was bummed out because I knew the gems wouldn't let me go because I just got out of the hospital, so I lied to them. “Sorry, guys, but I got a lot of important gem work to do. Maybe later.” My spirits were low as I saw them get upset a bit, I knew they were playing it off like it was not a big deal.

Aww.” Jenny protested.

“Bummer.” Sour Cream shrugged and looked down at his feet.

“Well, catch you later, then.” Buck said before they all walked away, I kind of felt like crying because I let them down for not hanging with them. I walked back to the temple, and forced a smile on my face as the gems and my dad greeted me as I walked inside the house.

Later That Night

I wasn't able to sleep as I kept having dreams about Lapis, and then my mom, so I just lying in bed. It was hard to move around a lot too. If I moved the wrong way a pain shot through my body right under my rib caged. I should have picked a better place. There was then a thump comes from the window. What was that? “Huh?” I stared out of the window until I jerked back a bit as a piece of pizza hits the window. “Huh, pizza rain, but no pizza clouds.” What was going on out there? Another piece of pizza hits the window, leaving a red stain on the glass. Pearl was going to freak in the morning. I got up and looked out the window, I saw Buck Dewey and Sour Cream. “Wha—?” I needed to know what they wanted, so I walked out of the front door and approached them. “What are you two doing here? And why are you making it pizza rain?”

Buck laughed a little, and smiled at me. “I only wanted to see you laughing in the pizza rain.” he had told me, I paused for a second confused.

“Is that a reference to something?” I had asked him, still confused. However, he did not answer my question.

“C'mon. It's time to hang out.” What? It was too late to hang out, what was he talking about?

“We can't hang out at night! Night is for dreaming.” And that is what I honestly believed. Night was to dream, to have your mind run awhile, except tonight wasn't for dreaming. Not if they were nightmares that is.

“Night is whatever you want it to be, time is an illusion.” Sour Cream had told me, and that was pretty deep. “But first we have to deliver the rest of this pizza to Mr. Smiley.” Did they really throw slices of pizza at my window that belonged to someone else? Holy crap. Alright. I told them that I will go, I was walking a bit better without my crutch so I just left it at home. By the time we had delivered the pizza, we were on the road heading out of beach city, Jenny was driving us, and I was in the back of the car with Sour Cream.

“Whoo! Wind in your face, that's what I'm talking about!” Jenny said and waved her hand out of the window with one still on the driver's wheel. I smiled at how much fun they all seemed to be having.

Buck looked back to me with a giant smile on his face. “Breathe deep, Steven. This is the smell of freedom.” I did, I took a deep breath, but all I got was a pepperoni smell.

“Freedom smells like pepperoni.”

Jenny had laughed at that, and my cheeks went red. “That's just the car.”

“You know what food definitely doesn't smell like freedom? Fish!” Sour Cream sounded a little distant, but I was curious why it was fish, and nothing else.

“Why fish?” I asked him.

“Uh, oh, here we go.” Jenny didn't seem to happy that I asked the question, maybe Sour Cream had vented this about them before.

“Ugh, my step-dad was all on my case today saying—“ He made mumbling sounds that I didn't quite understand from him, but listened anyway. “—eugh. I'm just like, I don't want to be a fisherman. Everyone knows you can't rave in a raincoat, step-dad!” Sour Cream seemed to have it a bit rough, I felt a little bit bad for him.

“At least he only bugs you about one thing. My dad's gotta say something about everything I do, 'cause I'm the mayor's son. And I'm like, you can't tell me what to do, I'm the mayor's ... wait.” I laughed a little bit as Buck just put his foot in his mouth. (Not literally.)

Jenny laughed along with me before she started to speak up at as well. “Puh-lease, you're are walking in cake with that talk. You guys don't even know what bad is until you have a sister. Look, I don't know why I have to spell it out that I'm the evil twin and she's the good one! Don't ask me to help you with your homework, I'm at some metal concert.” Ah, yes, I didn't know what it was like to have any siblings they sounded pretty tricky to me.

“Family stuff is tricky.” They all nodded in agreement with me. “I found out that the Gems are alien rebels, and there are other Gems out there that want us dead because they think we're traitors. And they tried to take me hostage because they think I'm my mom. And maybe I kinda am?” I sighed and tried to hold back the tears as I spoke. “I wish I could talk to Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl about it, but I think they kinda blame me for my mom not being around. = They also didn't really care when a friend of mine died during the crash of the hand. They told me that didn't realize I was so bummed out.”

There was silence from the kids until Jenny turned off the music that was softly playing in the background. “That's heavy.” she had told me, I shrugged.

“I guess.”

“But you always seem so upbeat. You're a real champ, Steven Universe.” Buck gave me a thumbs up and I nodded. I guess I was. I needed to be, I didn't need anyone worrying anymore.

“Yeah, I'd turn to fishing in a heartbeat if it meant not dealing with thaaaaat!” Sour Cream pointed to something in the field, and the car screeches to a halt throwing me forward into Jenny's seat. I groaned as a sharp pain went through me. “Look at that!”

“What?! What did I hit?! What is it?!” Jenny was starting to freak out.

“Glowing” I turned my head to the field to see a green aura shinning brightly in the middle. “We gotta check it out.” Sour Cream said. The car shifts and Jenny started to drive into the field. We parked a bit from the light, and we walked towards it. I was as curious as all of them. “That's, like, as bright as like 600 glowsticks.” There was a huge crater with Peridot's escape pod in it.

We shouldn't be messing around with this. “Peridot's escape pod.” I inhaled before moving as fast as I could even though it hurt me a lot. “Okay, everybody, step back! This is a gem machine and could be extremely dangerous.” I told them holding up my hands as I stood in front of the three older kids.

“Check it out.” Sour Cream walked right around me, making me frustrated.

“What are you doing?!” I asked as Sour Cream threw rocks at the pod. Whoa, stop! Peridot might still be in there.”

“Peri- what?” Buck asked walking over to the pod and standing next to Sour Cream. Jenny walked over as well, ignoring my protests.

“This biz is empty.”

Buck laughs. “It looks so busted.” And it really did. It was all dirty and some of the metal was bashed in.

“You need to get away from there!” I yelled worried that Peridot might still be around here somewhere. I didn't need her coming over and trying to kill us all for messing with her stuff.

“You need to relax. It's not doing anything.” Jenny said.

“it's not just the pod. This means Peridot is just out there somewhere, trying to hurt the earth!” I was seriously pretty scared right now. And I did not expect their answers.

“Not cool, Earth forever!” Buck kicks the pod.

“Here come the rocks!” Sour Cream dumps rocks on the pod, and I rolled my eyes sighing. There was no hope in trying to communicate with these teenagers.

“Steven, come take a selfie with me and this thing.” Jenny said, and I sighed shaking my head.

“No, Jenny, I'm serious.”

“So am I. Sour Cream, what about you?”

“Sure, I'm down with whatever.”

“Buck?”

“Nah, I like to just experience the moment for what it is sometimes. Plus the lighting is weird.”

“Ugh, okay. Steven. Last call. I got funny stickers.” I stood there stiff as I thought about it, I watched Jenny pose and took the picture. She then took one with her, and Sour Cream. I guess this wasn't so bad after all. It was actually pretty cool. I photo-bombed another one that was of her, and Sour Cream and I started to laugh at their faces. We took one with all of us, and Jenny put Roses around the border of the picture. I smiled big for the next one with all of us, Jenny put more stickers on this picture as well. This was way more fun than I thought it was going to be. Way more fun that I had in a long time. Tonight was one of those nights where I didn't feel like total crap for once.

Jenny squealed and jumped about as I leaned against the front of the pod, Buck leaned against it on my left and Sour Cream on my right. “Uhh, these are so good!”

I smiled and pointed a finger gun at her. “How do I look?”

“You look great, look, stay right there, I'm going to take one more...” Her face lights up and she gasps, “Steven, you should get in there.” I jumped and turned staring at the pod confused.

“What?”

“Just for a second, one picture.” I sighed, and shrugged. I guess it wasn't going to be that bad. The kids laughed as I climbed into the pod. It was pretty cozy in here, to be honest. “Okay, ready! 3, 2...” That's when I jumped as I heard Pearl screech.

“Steven, get out of there!” I jumped out quickly, as the Crystal Gems ran over to me. I was so ashamed. I didn't mean to get caught. Ugh, they must hate me now. They must be so ashamed of me. “What were you doing in there? You know you had to get us straight away with this stuff, Steven!”

“Steven, this is unacceptable. I'm very disappointed in you.” Garnet put her hands-on her hips and stared down at me, I felt so small compared to her. I wanted to hide under a rock right now. “Especially after you just got home from the hospital.”

I sighed and nodded. “You're right ...” That's when the teenagers jumped in front of me, pushing me back a little ways from the gems. What were they doing? I could handle myself, I opened my mouth to say something when I was cut off by Jenny. Her arm was outstretched in front of me.

“Hey, cut him some slack!”

“It's not his fault!” Buck yelled.

“Just let him be a DJ!” I was taken back by what Sour Cream said. I am pretty sure that is you buddy. I hid a giggle at Pearl's confused face.

“Wha—?” Before she could say anything, Sour Cream, had interrupted her again. They really needed to stop interrupting people.

“We just wanted Steven to have some fun. I don't know what's going on with aliens trying to abduct him, and him being his own mom, or even the fact that somebody that was dear to him being crushed by a giant space hand. But it sounds like he's got a lot on his mind.”

“I'm sure whatever you're having him do is important, but everyone needs a break once in a while. Especially, this kid. He has so much on his mind. He just got out of the hospital and everything.” Jenny said.

“He's just a kid.” Buck added.

Pearl sighs with her hand on her chin, she looks at Garnet. “Maybe we have been a little hard on him.” You got that right. I wanted to discuss this with them more, but not in front of the others. They were more than hard on me, they were being distant, and hard asses about my feelings. They were being selfish as well, not caring about what I was going through. Especially with the face about my mom and Lapis.

Amethyst shrugs and stares at Garnet as well. “He did just break us out of space jail.” They were right, I saved their asses on multiple occasions.

Garnet smiled down at me and ruffled my hair. “I'm sorry, Steven.” She said, and I smiled going up to her, and hugging her. I smirked and grabbed Jenny's phone before starting to take selfies. We took multiple and it was great. I felt like a family again. However, I knew it wouldn't last very long. Not one bit.