A Place of Hope and No Pain

Chloe's POV

He made me so mad, always coming over, always sticking his nose in and now he was going to be fucking late. He shouldn't have bothered coming, only I wanted him to come over and I hated myself for that, for needing Matt.

I was starving hungry and we were supposed to be ordering in and watching a movie, but now I'd have to wait. The inconsiderate ass wipe.

I knew when he'd arrived, over an hour late, because Lucy was doing her little ass wiggle at the door. I walked to the door and opened it, attempting to be mad, but how could I, he looked so damn good, he was showering my dog with affection and he had flowers. Roses, my favourite.

I took the flowers from him, and went to find a vase and that's when shit hit the fan. He'd done it again, getting involved in my business, telling my mother I'd go to Harper's party. Why the fuck would I go to Harper's party? My family had fucked me over big time and now they all just expected me to attend a family gathering, like nothing had happened, and Harper's birthday of all things? And Matt, god he made me so damn mad, yes I liked him, and yes I liked spending time with him, but god, he didn't need to know about my life, it was in the past and I intended it to stay there.

He infuriated me, he really did and I lost my cool, yelling at him, he yelled back, which made me even angrier, but then, then he did something I never saw coming.

"Shut up Chloe." He muttered, reaching over and pulling me to him, kissing me gently on the lips.

How dare he? How dare he try and silence me like this? And I was going to push him away and tell him so, he had no right to kiss me, I never asked him to kiss me, but fuck, it felt so nice that instead of pushing him away I closed my eye's, kissing back, enjoying it.

"Have you calmed down yet?" He whispered against my lips.

"Now look." I snapped. Did he have to be such a smart ass?

"Obviously not." He murmured, kissing me again.

I closed my eye's again, enjoying it. Did I want this? I'd been alone for so long, independent, I didn't need anyone, but now, here I was letting someone in and that thought terrified me.

"Now." He said softly. "Why don't we order dinner and then we can talk."

"About what?" I muttered, knowing full well what he wanted to talk about.

"Chloe." He said calmly. "I've told you everything about me, everything and I know nothing about you, please, please trust me, I would never hurt you, ever."

"Well forgive me for not believing you, but I've been told that before." And I had and I'd been betrayed in the worst possible way. "Look Matt, I don't want to live in the past, I want it to stay there, I want to live for the here and now."

"I understand that Chloe." He said softly. "But I want to know you, all of you and to do that I want to know what happened, what made you you."

He was persistent that was for sure and as he ordered dinner for us I realised he wasn't going to give this up, I was going to have tell him what had happened with my family, whether I liked it or not.

Dinner arrived and we sat on the couch eating, Matt sharing his with Lucy and when we'd finished I cleaned up while those two stayed in the living room. I could hear Matt talking to Lucy, asking about what movie we should watch.

"Drink?" I called out to Matt.

"Please." He answered and I grabbed a couple of soda's, heading back into the living room.

I sat on the couch and looked at Matt. "So I guess you want me to tell you then?"

He smiled, moving closer and putting his arm around my shoulder. "Yeah I do." He murmured softly, leaning over and kissing me again.

"Well I don't know where you want me to start?" I said softly and I didn't, I just didn't know where to start.

"From the beginning I guess." He said smiling at me.

"Well you know what my marriage was like." I told him. "I talked about it in group, I never felt good enough for Drew, he was critical of everything I did, drinking made that better. When I was drunk I had so much confidence that nothing he could say would make me feel bad."

"Drew is a dick." Matt murmured and I nodded, Drew was a dick.

"I was in love, so I was stupid." I said to him. "I don't know, I didn't realise I had a drinking problem, I always thought I had under control until..........well I just realised I didn't, not at all, I couldn't go a day without being drunk."

Matt nodded. "Yeah Chloe, I know that feeling."

"I was under so much pressure, my life at that time was stressful and I wanted to be the best I could, I really did, so it was a group decision, between me, my family and Drew that I would go into rehab, they would support me while I was in there." I said softly, hating the feeling of even having to talk about it.

Matt didn't say anything, but he pulled me closer, kissing my temple.

"Little did I know, that while I'd been drinking everyday, my husband had been sleeping with my sister." I said taking a deep breath. "My family knew about it, it was at least a year and everyone hid it from me." And I hated them for it. "My sister came to rehab, to tell me all the horrible things I did, I cried, I felt so bad, but all that time she was fucking my husband and she had the hide to make me feel like shit." And I could still see her face, her crying, talking about all the horrible things I'd done, she was a fucking hypocrite. "So, I succeeded in rehab, I came out sober and found out that everything I was doing it for had been taken away from me, I came out with nothing, oh except my car, I had that, so yeah." I said shrugging. "My family betrayed me, in a big way, so yeah I have an issue forgiving them."

Matt sat there silently, looking at me. I wondered what he was thinking. Could he see the hole's that were in my story? The forbidden thing I would never speak of?

"I won't." He said suddenly, looking at me and taking my face in his hands. "I would never betray you Chloe.

I nodded, I'd been told that before.

"Chloe." He murmured leaning in closer. "I need you and I think you need me."

I closed my eye's as he kissed me. He was right, we did need each other.