A Story to Tell Your Friends

“Clara, it’s 2am, I think it’s time to go home,” Tammy told me, hands on her hips. Almost everyone had called it a night already, leaving just Alex, Jack, Lisa, Tammy and I sat in the bar as it emptied around us. I was beyond drunk, as were Jack and Lisa, and Tammy was attempting to be the voice of reason to me, while the others insisted on being a bad influence.
“We’ll make sure she’s safe,” Lisa promised, leaning into Alex who was holding her up straight in her seat.
“You aren’t even keeping yourself safe right now, Lis.” I heard Alex laugh, seeing Lisa hit him lightly for agreeing with Tammy.
“Well, I’m not as drunk as other people, and Alex is sober enough.” Tammy rolled her eyes, though finally starting to admit defeat as her phone buzzed signalling her taxi had arrived.
“If she comes home with so much as a scratch, I will find you and I will kill you,” Tammy told Alex, who nodded, despite the fact he’d drank enough that he was just about able to take care of himself and Lisa. He definitely wasn’t sober enough to keep an eye on Jack and I too.
“Love you, honey boo! See you later!” I screeched as she turned to leave. She flipped me off as she walked away, making me laugh loudly.
“How come she gets to be ‘honey boo’ and I’m just ‘douche bag’?” Jack pouted. His hands were intertwined with my own and had been so for nearly an hour, though we’d of course freed ourselves to carry on drinking.
“Because you’re cuter than she is?”
“How does cuter mean I’m a douche bag?”
“Well, I can’t go playing all my cards at once, can I? If I call you ‘cutie pie’ too much, you’ll get too full of yourself. I have to keep something back for when you’re being completely adorable.”
If you end up going home with Jack, I will murder you.
I snorted at my text alert from Tammy, Jack peeking his head around so he could see my notification also.
“Sweet. If the best friend thinks there’s a chance, I’m definitely in with a shot.”
“Hey! She’s drunk, she doesn’t know what she’s saying!”
“Neither do I?”
“Jack, I haven’t even kissed you yet and I’m drunk off my ass: there’s no way you’re getting any action tonight.”
“I didn’t say action. Just, could you imagine all the bragging I could do when I finally get a girl into my apartment? Fuck, I’d be the envy of all the guys.” I shook my head at him, grinning.
“You’re such a nerd.”
Sorry, mom, I’ll be home by midnight and I won’t kiss any boys. PS. I mean midnight tomorrow. PPS. I make no promises about the boys.
I threw my phone in my purse and detached myself from Jack, asking if anyone needed a drink as I finished off my own. I knew I needed to slow down a little considering how worried Tammy had seemed about getting me home, so while I had no intention of stopping outright, I chose a drink that had a least a little lower alcohol percentage.
“Where are we even going? It’s 4am, there’s nowhere open, and everyone we know is at home in bed,” I stated, heels in hand as Jack and I walked down the street together. Lisa and Alex had called a cab home about half an hour ago, while Jack and I had stated that it was definitely time for something smothered in grease before the pair of us headed home too. Unfortunately, we’d not been able to find anywhere like that and I was stumbling too much in my heels and had been forced to take them off.
“There’s a great little place a couple of blocks over,” Jack shrugged, hands in his pockets since he’d been forced to relinquish his grip on my own hands.
“Jack, I don’t even know where we are and I feel like we’ve been walking forever. However tempting a container full of solidified grease sounded twenty minutes ago, I’m not so sure now.”
“They do the best cheese fries with bacon.”
“You had me at cheese.”
Jack laughed, continuing to show me the way to the take out place he’d been referring to, stopping occasionally when I complained about how fast he was walking. I almost fell into the only available seat in the shop when Jack and I finally reached our destination. The area we were in was much quieter and a little more residential than the place we’d left, so I was surprised anywhere was open at this time. Especially considering the sun was already starting to come up and I was sure (for about the hundredth time this week) that Tammy was going to kill me when I finally fell through the door.
“We’re about five minutes from my place, if you wanna eat your food in comfort,” Jack suggested, as he placed our orders and refused the half-assed attempt I’d made to pay for my own food. I raised my eyebrows at him, looking up from the text I was attempting to send to Tammy. I was trying to be coherent in my writing, and it wasn’t working.
“Oh, so that was your plan all along, was it? Seduce me into your apartment with cheese fries?”
“You caught me. I figured if that didn’t work, the left over Chinese food in my fridge might have.” I snorted, though didn’t argue. In the few days Jack and I had been talking, I’d spent most of it gushing over food.
“I’m clearly the most easily kidnap-able person in the world, because I’m totally down for that.” Yup, Tammy was going to murder me.
Going home with a cute boy and his cheese fries, don’t wait up mommy!
Jack pulled me up from my seat when our order was called and I grabbed my shoes from the floor, my feet still hurting too much to even think of putting them on. Jack had exaggerated the distance to his apartment and it took us less than five minutes to reach the building, literally turning the corner the shop was on and walking half way down the road until we reached it. Jack’s building thankfully had a lift and we stepped into it, he pushing the ‘5’ button and showing me to his apartment.
“You have the most comfortable couch I think I’ve ever sat on,” I stated, sinking into his sofa and pulling my feet up.
“It’s for those nights when I can’t bring myself to walk the ten feet to my bedroom,” Jack laughed, joining me and handing me my food. I grinned, thanking him as he passed me a plastic fork he’d picked up with our order.
“I think it’s for the chicks. I genuinely believe you lure them in with your takeout food and they get trapped by your couch.”
“Guilty. You’re sat on top of hundreds of girls I’ve lured here who have never left. Now shut up and eat your food.” I laughed at his attempt to look after me, probably knowing that the amount of carbs and grease I was about to consume would sober me up enough to stall any hangover I had coming. Jack switched on the TV, flicking through the channels until he came upon a late night Friends rerun. Jack shuffled closer to me, and I spread my legs over his lap, resting my back against the arm rest and starting to pick at my food.
“Oh my God, these are incredible,” I told him as I finished my first mouthful. “I literally thought you’d lied to me to get me here.” Jack raised his eyebrows at me.
“I’m not that clever, Clara. Alex is the one who always had the best lines to tempt girls back home.”
“And I’m sure Lisa just used to love that.” Jack shrugged.
“We were kids. He used enough of them on her over the years and they always ended up making up for a while before he did something stupid and they broke up. They weren’t always as perfect as they look now.”
“So that’s why I suck at relationships. I’m so cynical the lines never work on me and I’m such a stubborn mule that I never forgive anyone.”
“Well, my cheese fries line worked on you.”
“That’s because you used my one-true-love: food.”
“So, what, guys are just second best?”
“So far, they’re third best. But, shh, don’t tell anyone.” Jack rolled his eyes, finishing up his food as I still picked apart what I had left. I always finished anything I was given, I just did it slowly because clearly my parents had never taught me not to play with my food. Plus, it had irritated my brother when we were younger because he always had to stay at the table until everyone had finished.
“So, food, Tammy, boys?”
“Pretty much. But boys are tied a little with games I can binge on.”
“Speaking of! Consider this my official invitation to use my PlayStation.” My eyes lit up a little, remembering the conversation we’d had on Wednesday. I nodded my head vigorously, telling him I was still a little too wired to sleep just yet and knowing that if I went home in this mood, I’d only end up waking Tammy and making her stay up until 6am when I would finally sleep. Jack stood up and starting to make his way to the hallway as I put my now empty food container on his coffee table.
“Where you going?”
“The bedroom,” he laughed. “I was playing Doom in bed last night so I’m going to have to go grab it.” I rolled my eyes.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Jack, it’s 4:30. I’ll just sit on your bedroom floor playing it. You know, if you don’t mind me keeping you up a little longer, that is,” I added, realising I’d just invited myself into his bedroom for the night. I still had every intention of calling a cab before I fell asleep, but I had no idea when that would be or if Jack already wanted rid of me. Then again, you don’t bring up the subject of video games to someone if you don’t want them to stay at least a little longer.
“Well, if you’re sure you aren’t stuck in my couch already, sure; of course I don’t mind.” I stood up, following Jack down a small hallway and taking the final door on the left, which lead me into his bedroom. It was a typical boy bedroom: bed unmade, clothes all over and a TV and games console set up at the end of his bed. The walls were painted a light brown colour, though one of the walls you could hardly see that as it was mostly made up of glass. I looked out, seeing how light it was becoming and enjoying the view. It was kind of limited considering he was only on the fifth floor, but you could still see enough of the city to make it worth it. I tore myself away from the window, sitting down next to Jack at the foot of his bed to pick out a game.
“What about Alien?” Jack smirked, making me roll my eyes.
“I know you just want to either record me freaking out in the dark or make me want to hide my face in you so you can make a cheesy move, so, no thanks.” Jack laughed, shrugging. That game scared me in the middle of the day, so I think I’m best of steering clear when I’m half drunk and the sun still isn’t up, especially since I was now alone with a guy I’d met a week ago. I definitely did still have some standards. In the end, Jack and I settled on Fallout. I’d already played it for a solid few weeks when it had first come out, but it was an easy game to come back to and start again. I allowed Jack to create my character, laughing at the weird choices he’d made, causing my character to be half Neanderthal and half model. “I don’t know what kind of shit you’re into, Barakat, but you’ve already worried me.”
Jack finally handed me back the controller and I settled in, immersing myself in the game.