Stuck Inside Your Hurricane

Jack stood in the ballroom of The 1840’s dressed in a simple black suit with a white dress shirt, the top few buttons being undone. His parents were off talking to some of his father’s co-workers and Jack was looking for his siblings, Joe and May. He maneuvered his way through the sea of people crowding around the circular dining tables, on his way to the bar where he agreed to meet up with Joe.

“Jack, over here!” He heard his brother’s voice yell and turned to his left to see Joe standing at the bar. Jack walked over and grabbed a flute of champagne off the bartop and quickly took a drink.

“I want to get this night over with,” Jack said as he leaned against the bar.

“Have you seen her yet?” Joe asked as he took a Crown and Coke from the bartender and faced his younger brother.

“No, but I’m sure she’s around here somewhere,” Jack said as he scanned the crowd for Caroline. Her father has worked with Jack and Joe’s for as long as they can remember. They both worked in different departments but for the same hospital and were receiving the same award tonight.

“Maybe she won’t show after this morning,” Joe mentioned and Jack shrugged his shoulders. “May just messaged me, she’s over by mom and dad.”

He finished his champagne and grabbed another flute before following Joe to where their parents were. Just as they were weaving through a crowd of people, someone knocked into Jack causing him to spill his champagne on himself.

Jack mentally cursed himself as he grabbed a napkin from the table next to him and began patting his shirt.

“Oh, man! I’m so sorry!” The gentleman said as he set his drink down and grabbed another napkin to help dry Jack off.

“It’s fine, I can do it,” Jack muttered.

“Hey, aren’t you Jack from All Time Low?” The stranger questioned as he stood there watching Jack clean himself up.

“Yeah. You a fan?” Jack asked as he set the napkin down, doing the best job he could to dry his shirt, then looked up at the muscular brunette standing in front of him.

“Not really. I think you guys have great music but it’s not my style. My fiancé is a ginormous fan though,” this guy mentioned and Jack nodded his head. “She’s been to every show in New York and even works as a music critic and always writes articles on your concerts.”

“That’s awesome! What’s your name, man?” Jack asked as he walked back to the bar to retrieve another drink.

“The name is Tobias,” he said as he followed the guitarist. “My fiancé is around here somewhere. She wandered off to the bathroom a few minutes ago.”

“Cool, maybe I could meet her and give her my autograph,” Jack offered as he grabbed a drink. He looked down at his shirt and shrugged at the minor stain before taking a drink.

“That’d be awesome!”

Jack and Tobias fell into an easy conversation about music genres and movies. He was a pretty cool guy. Jack took a minute to scan the room and his eyes fell on Caroline walking towards him. She was wearing a light pink dress with sequined flowers on it and her hair pinned back. She had a bright smile on her face, but she wasn’t looking at him. She was looking at Tobias. Eventually Caroline looked at Jack and quickly looked back at her fiancé and her eyes widened in realization. She never told Jack she was engaged, not that he should care, but she definitely didn’t want him finding out like this.

“Babe! Look who I ran into here,” Tobias said to Caroline as he held his hand out to her. Caroline faked a smile and took her fiancés hand.

“Wow! That’s amazing!” Caroline said with excitement.

“You must be Tobias’ fiancé. I’m Jack, I’ve heard you’re a fan of my band,” Jack faked. He could tell that Caroline never told Tobias about him, why make her life miserable. Jack’s mother raised him to behave better than that.

“Uh, yeah. I am. I’ve seen you guys in concert every year for the last eight years,” she replied and that broke Jack’s heart. She’d been at his shows but never made any effort to reach out to him during the show.

“That’s awesome.”

“I can’t believe you’ve never met him, his dad works with yours,” Tobias said and Caroline, internally, shook her head at his obliviousness.

“Well, do you have something I can sign or would you like a picture? I need to get back to my family,” Jack, painfully, said. This was killing him.

“Let’s get a photo, babe!” Tobias exclaimed as he pulled his phone out. He pushed Jack and Caroline together, forcing Jack to put his arm around Caroline. Her body still fit perfectly underneath his. The two forced a smile and when the flash went off they separated.

“It was great meeting you two, thanks for all of the support,” Jack said and turned to walk away. He needed to get out of there. He went up to the bar and asked the bartender for the strongest liquor they had on the rocks. He took the glass and tossed it back before he walked towards the lobby of the building, wanting to get some fresh air. Just as he reached for the handle of the main entrance Caroline called his name. He turned around and saw her running after him.

“Leave me alone, Caroline,” Jack said to her as he yanked the door open and stepped outside.

“I’m not leaving you without talking first,” she said as she followed him outside.

“That didn’t stop you eight years ago,” Jack commented and he heard her sigh as he walked up to a couple of partygoers that were smoking outside after hearing Caroline mutter something along the lines of how she deserved that. “You guys mind if I bum one?”

One of the men handed Jack a cigarette and a lighter. He lit the smoke and took a long drag, blowing the smoke out into the cold Baltimore night.

“Since when do you smoke?” Caroline, judgingly, questioned.

“Only when I’m stressed out,” Jack muttered as he walked away from the two men. “What do you want?”

“I want to talk to you about what just happened,” she said as she crossed her arms over her chest to protect her from the cold air.

“Oh! You mean meeting your fiancé? Or the fact that you went to every single one of my shows in New York for the last eight years?” Jack, harshly, pointed out.

“We aren’t together anymore, Jack. We haven’t been for eight years,” Caroline pointed out and Jack couldn’t help but release a harsh laugh and take another drag from the cigarette.

“Last I checked we never broke up. You decided to stop talking to me.” Jack threw the smoke on the ground and stepped on it, shoving his hands into his pockets and facing Caroline.

“We haven’t talked in eight years! That’s a break up!” Caroline yelled. She took a deep breath and lookied at her former flame with sadness in her eyes. She knew she hurt him, but she wasn’t ready to accept that.

“How long have you two been together?” Jack questioned, staring at the outside wall of the venue they were at.

“Seven years,” she whispered. Jack looked at her with such disgust as he held his hand over his ear.

“I’m sorry, what? I didn’t hear you.”

“I said seven years, Jack!” She spit out.

“That’s fantastic! I’m so happy for you, Caroline. I wish you two the best future,” Jack, bitterly, said. “Now tell me, does he know you slit your wrists so bad you were ten minutes away from dying?”

Caroline’s eyes began to tear up at his harsh words. Words that were pointed towards her lowest time in life. “No, he doesn’t. He thinks I was in a bad car wreck.”

“Unbelievable. How come you never told him about me?”

“I knew he would want me to stop going to your shows, but I needed that sense of home. I needed to be close to you even if I couldn’t muster up the courage to talk to you at any of them,” Caroline told him as she shivered. Jack sighed before taking off his suit jacket and handing it to her. She shook her head but Jack shoved the coat into her hands.

“As much as I hate you right now, I don’t want you getting sick or people thinking I’m a douchebag if they were to walk by.”

Caroline took the jacket and Jack’s scent overwhelmed her sense of smell. She missed him, she knew that much. He made her really happy and pushing him to the side was the hardest thing she’d ever done.

“Why Caroline, why? I was there for you! You told me everything; I helped you through it all. I was there for you when Steph—you know what? Forget it,” Jack said as he began to walk away. Caroline grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop.

“The reason I stopped talking to you was because you reminded me too much of home at the time. My doctors told me I would never get better if I didn’t cut off ties from the people that reminded me, that reminded me of Stephen. So I cut everyone out of my life, including my parents for almost a year. Once I was released from the hospital, I was happy. I wasn’t depressed anymore. I accepted Stephen’s death and moved on. I went to NYU and got a degree in Journalism.”

“But why didn’t you just tell me that? I know you didn’t want me to wait, but Caroline I would have understood,” Jack pleaded.

“I knew it would be too hard for me to tell you that. I knew it would crush you.” Caroline wiped the tears away from under her eyes and looked at Jack. He was still the same Jack from high school, but he matured a lot. He still had his goofy black hair with the blonde streak but you could tell he’d gotten it professionally done this time. He’d grown out his facial hair and his beard suit him well. He wasn’t as scrawny anymore and he had a tattoo.

“Why eight years though, Carrie? Why not when you got out?” Caroline smiled at the use of her old nickname, but quickly let it fall.

“I’d figured you took it hard when I stopped talking to you and so I thought maybe it’d be best that I just didn’t reach out again,” she muttered. “I also had some other stuff going on when I was at the treatment center that I couldn’t tell you. I didn’t know when I’d be ready to tell you, so I avoided you as best as I could.”

“What other stuff?”

“I’m not ready to tell you just yet. But I really want to,” Caroline pleaded as the memories of her past lurked in the back of her mind. She had to fight herself from opening her mouth and spilling one of her biggest secrets.

“What are you wanting out of this? Why did you come talk to me this morning and tonight?” Jack asked her as he paced back and forth, anxiously.

“I want to be friends again, Jack. I miss having you around and it worked out that the both of us would be in town for this,” she said as she wringed her fingers out from stress.

Jack, once again, harshly laughed at Caroline’s words. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You don’t get to make that decision. We denied our feelings for each other for years, then we admit them to one another and were the happiest couple at Dulaney. We were in love, we talked about our future together! Now you want to be friends after eight years of no contact? Are you out of your mind?! You can’t expect me to forgive you right away. Put yourself in my shoes!” Jack yelled at her and pulled at his hair.

“Jack, pleas—“

“I have to go. Our dads are about to receive their award,” Jack said as he brushed past Caroline and stormed back inside. He looked around the ballroom for his family and saw Joe standing off to the side of the stage with his mom and sister. He walked up to them and gave May a kiss on the cheek and stood by his brother. Joe looked at Jack with confusion at the absence of his suit jacket that he had on thirty minutes ago.

“Where’s your coat?” Joe questioned and Jack looked at him in question before realizing he never got it back from Caroline. Jack looked back at the ballroom entrance and saw Caroline walk in, wearing his jacket, and wiping at her swollen eyes. Joe followed his brothers line of vision and saw who he was looking at and widened his eyes.

“What happened?” Joe questioned and Jack shook his head.

“I don’t want to talk about it. I’m tired of talking tonight,” Jack muttered as he watched his dad and Mr. Richards walk on stage as the crowd applauded them. Jack looked down at the drink in Joe’s hand and snatched it from him, tossing the liquid back.

“You better tell me everything once this is over,” Joe threatened causing Jack to roll his eyes.

Jack peaked over at Caroline and her family. He saw Tobias comforting her and trying to question her as to why she was crying but she kept shaking her head and pushing him away. Caroline could feel someone staring at her and when she looked to her left, Jack’s eyes were locked on hers. Jack, quickly, shook himself out of his thoughts and released the breath he was holding.

Caroline held eye contact with Jack and he never broke it. They both stared at each other with pity. He let out another sigh and looked up at the ceiling, as if he were contemplating something, before looking back at Caroline.

Jack quickly mouthed, “lunch tomorrow?” Caroline couldn’t stop the smile from forming on her face as she shook her head yes. Jack held up one finger and mouthed, “end of my driveway,’ meaning she needed to meet him at one o’clock at the end of his parents drive way. She excitedly nodded her head before clapping at the end of her father’s acceptance speech.

They both knew they were brought together these last few days for a reason. However, neither of them knew what that reason was.