Playing With Fire

~Zack’s POV~

The home phone rang loudly over the slow crunching of my cereal, startling me out of my chair at the kitchen table. I quickly sat back down, my head throbbing with every beat of my heart.

“Fuck,” I muttered to myself as I trudged over to the phone. Zina looked up at me and giggled. My older sister loved seeing me in pain.

“Hello?” I duly answered.

“Wakey wakey, it’s one in the afternoon! We thought you died or got lost or something. Where the hell did you go last night?” Matt’s deep, thundering voice caused me to yank the phone away from my ear.

“I just went home and went to bed.”

“Well shit, let someone know next time. We were worried about you. I’ve been trying to call you all day. Hangover that bad?”

I rubbed my temples and tightly shut my eyes. “Mhm.”

“Well listen, I’ll give you ten minutes to get dressed and get your ass over to Brian’s. It’s nice out, let’s go to the beach.”

“Alright, see you in a bit.”

I hung up the phone and headed up to my room to throw on some jeans and grab my keys. Within minutes, I was out the door.

“Look who finally decided to show up. Nice to see you, sunshine,” Brian snickered as I got out of my car in his driveway. I responded with a swift flip of my middle finger.

I walk into the garage and let my eyes adjust to the light change. I lightheartedly waved at Val, who was sitting on Matt’s lap, and her sister, Michelle who was sitting next to them, picking her nail beds nervously. Jimmy and Johnny were playing around on Jimmy’s drumset, like always. I grabbed a beer out of the fridge and plopped down in a beanbag chair across the room.

“So Baker, how was your night? Saw you go upstairs with Autumn,” Brian winked as he sat down, putting his arm around Michelle’s shoulder. I scoff and roll my eyes before taking a sip of my beer.

“Nothing happened. We were both wasted,” I tried to convince them. Matt and Brian looked at each other and exchanged looks. A loud crash causes me to crank my neck to the left. I see Johnny toppled halfway over Jimmy’s drumset, and Jimmy acting like he’s going to spank him. I laughed for the first time since I saw CJ.

CJ. Fuck. I shouldn’t think about her. Hell, I highly doubt she’s thinking about me. How angry and hurt is she going to be once she finds out about Autumn? No, she won’t find out. I’m just going to tell everyone that nothing happened. If Autumn says otherwise, I’ll say she was too drunk to remember things properly. That’ll do the trick.

“Dude, are you coming or what?” Matt snapped his fingers in front of my face, bringing my attention back to what’s in front of me.

“Yeah, yeah. To the beach, right.” I downed the rest of my beer, disposing of it in the blue trash bin before climbing in my car. I sat in the driver seat, running my hand through my hair. No idea how I’m going to keep this lie up, and for how long. I backed out of the driveway and followed my friends to the beach, Cailey’s face staying in my mind.

Ten minutes later, I slam my door shut and walk towards Brian’s car as all five of them are filing out. Jimmy sprints towards the beach, Johnny riding on his back with his arms in the air. I chuckle and keep at my own pace. Brian grabs Michelle’s hand and leads her to the sand, Val not far behind. Val looks back to Matt, who is standing near me, and waves him to hurry.

“So, when are you gonna fess up?” Matt says behind me. I shut my eyes for a moment and turn slowly.

“Fess up to what?” I gulp hard. Matt cocks his head and gives me a look of certainty.

“You and Autumn.”

“I told you guys, nothing happened,” I looked down at my hands, instantly feeling the dirt and grime from my mistake wash over me again.

“That’s a lie and you know it,” he took a step closer to me. “Listen, nobody is going to be mad at you if you and Autumn had sex. I know she’s crazy,” I looked at him, knowing he was holding back. “Okay, she was really crazy. But a hookup never hurt anyone, right?” I stood there motionless.

“Please don’t tell anyone. I still feel fucking gross about it,” I confessed. Matt looked at me with trust in his eyes.

“I won’t. But I don’t think that’s all that’s going on either,” he paused, waiting for me to confess to more. I waited and let him elaborate. “You would never feel this shameful about something unless something else was on your mind. Or someone…” he drug out his sentence, urging me to continue.

I was caught. Caught red fucking handed. I threw up the white flag.

“Am I really that transparent?”

“Extremely.”

“I can’t deal with this, man. I’m in love with her and it won’t go away,” I admitted. First time I had admitted it, not only out loud, but to myself as well. I leaned against the car. He knew exactly who ‘her’ was. A slight look for hurt filled his eyes before blinking it away.

“I don’t blame you. She’s an amazing girl,” He breathed it. “What made you realize it, finally?” I looked at him and pulled my mouth to one side. Hopefully he’ll get the hint. After a few moments, he nodded and looked down. “You know everyone already knows, right? It was written all over your face yesterday. You don’t have to say it for us to know.” I rolled my eyes and pursed my lips.

“Yeah, I figured,” I scoffed.

“C’mon fuckers! Are you gonna get in the water or just hang out in the parking lot like a bunch of pansies?” Johnny’s voice squealed from yards away. I shook my head and Matt and I headed towards the water.

I threw my keys on the kitchen counter and grabbed a water bottle out of the fridge. Taking several gulps, I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch.

“Nice to see your friends nursed you back to health,” my mom jokingly taunts, not lifting her eyes from her crossword puzzle. I smile at her.

“Hey little brother,” Zina peeks around the corner, “there’s a sweet girl on the phone for you.” I hoist myself up quickly, resisting the urge to skip to the phone. I know it’s Cailey, she’s always doing cute things like that.

“Hellooo?” I answered, trying to hold a smile in.

“You’re really gonna lie to everyone? I can’t believe I trusted you again, Zack. Why are you so embarrassed of me, huh?” I sighed deeply and let my shoulders fall.

“Is this really why you’re calling my house right now, Autumn?”

“No Zack, you’re going to listen to what I have to say. I hate that you think I’m not good enough for you because I know I am. Just let me prove it. I promise I’ll treat you better than anyone ever has,” Autumn begged, her voice wavering.

“Autumn, we just hooked up. Let it go,” I put my hand over my eyes and whispered into the phone.

“Fine. Luckily you won’t be seeing my face anymore. Goodbye Zack.”

I hung up without a word to say.