Full Time Job

The next few days went by slowly. Our camp was still searching for Sophia with no luck. I had avoided Daryl at all costs. I couldn’t believe that I felt feelings for that redneck, and regret from kissing him bubbled up when I had spotted him around the farm. He had gone back to shooting me angry glares from across the camp when he wasn’t in the woods searching for Sophia.
Evening was approaching and Vinny and I were collecting wild berries on the edge of the clearing on Hershel’s property. I had promised Rick and Shane that we would not venture into the woods alone, so Vinny and I continued not to wander far from camp. Thankfully, we hadn’t come across any walkers in the large clearing on Hershel's property, save a soggy walker that had fallen into one of Hershel’s wells. The memory of its slimy skin and bloated body when they had pulled it out had still made me slightly nauseous.
Carol and I had grown closer, and the group around me started to feel like a family. I was so thankful that Rick and the guys had found us alone in the city. It seemed that most of the people in our small group had genuinely cared for one another and it reminded me of my family back home. I was starting to feel less feral and more like my old self as the days passed that I had spent with them. Also, the fact that they all had taken to Vinny so quickly made my heart happy.
And then there was Daryl. I had spent the last few days really trying to analyze what was really going on with him. Yes, we had shared a moment, and yes, I liked it. But the warm and fuzzy feelings that he caused were equal to the feelings of hurt and annoyance that he also made me feel. I couldn’t sort it out. I often tried to ignore the butterflies in my stomach when he walked by, because I knew that his feelings changed constantly, and it would never work. I needed stability.
However, whenever I had the chance to glance over, or listen to him talk with the group, I couldn’t help but give him my attention. And the butterflies always have come back. I had come to the conclusion that he was scarred, deeply. Either that or he was raised by wolves. Neither would surprise me when it came to Daryl Dixon.
“Zia, is this one still too green?” I heard Vinny ask, pulling me from my thoughts. He pointed towards a small, unripe berry that was nestled onto its vine.
“Yep, it’s not quite ready yet,” I answered and he nodded and continued searching, every once in a while he would drop some purple berries into the basket that I was carrying.
The Georgia heat was making Vinny’s face red, and I pulled him closer to the shade, where we sat together on a large stump that was just on the edge of the tree line. I pulled a water bottle from my back pack and we both rested on the rock, sharing the water.
“WALKER!” I heard someone from our camp scream and my stomach lurched. I scooped Vinny up and scanned the tree-line, searching frantically until my eyes rested on a dirty, stumbling figure march out of the woods about fifty yards away. The walker was stumbling towards Rick, Shane, T-Dogg, and Glenn, who were all sprinting toward it.
Holding Vinny tightly, I squinted towards Rick, who had approached the creature slowly, and I saw the glare from the sun’s reflection on the metal of Rick's gun as he pointed it at the thing. He was slowly lowering it and a strong confusion overtook me. Why didn’t he shoot? My eyes darted over to the walker and my stomach dropped. The thing was bloody, tattered, and had a crossbow slung across its back. It was Daryl. A terrible fear over took me, and a loud gunshot had caused me to jump out of my skin. Vinny had covered his ears and I could feel his arms wrap tightly around me, but he did not cry. I was not as brave. Warm tears started streaming down my face as Daryl collapsed on the ground, and the men in front of him swarmed him immediately after. I could feel my legs running towards them before my brain had consciously decided to do so.
As I grew closer, I watched as the men had hoisted Daryl over their shoulders and ran him towards the house. I followed behind them and my thoughts were racing. Were they rushing him to Hershel? Why? It looked like he had been bitten and had changed from where I was standing.
I had finally caught up to them, walking quickly to match their strides, Vinny was bouncing up and down on my hip.
“He’s got geek ears around his neck,” I heard Shane say and Rick yanked the home-made necklace from Daryl’s neck and shoved it into his pocket.
“Let’s keep that to ourselves,” Rick said quietly and they met Hershel on the porch. Everyone bustled into the house and was ordered out when Hershel began to look over Daryl’s injuries. He looked pale and was covered in dirt and blood. I swore that I had seen one of his own arrows had penetrated his side and my stomach turned.
We waited on the porch with Carol, Rick, and Shane while Hershel was inside with Daryl. I was sitting on a porch step with Carol and Vinny was sitting on her lap.
“What happened to Mr. Daryl?” Vinny asked.
“We aren’t sure yet, sweetheart,” Carol answered, looking towards me with concerned eyes. I nodded and smoothed his unruly hair down, incredibly anxious. We sat together quietly when Andrea slowly approached the farmhouse.
“I’m so sorry, Rick. I thought he was a walker… I was only trying to help…” She said, regret in her voice and in her eyes. Anger panged uncomfortably in my chest, and I deliberately avoided her eye contact. Ever since it was proven that she was a good shooter, she was anxious to do just that. Shoot. It was irritating to me that she didn’t bother to remember the one rule that is always first taught to anyone learning to shoot a firearm. Never ever pull the trigger unless you are absolutely sure of your target. You can never take it back. I fidgeted slightly and rested my head in my hands, trying to calm myself.
I felt Carol gently rub my back and I took a deep breath.
“Don’t worry about it, Andrea. You were just trying to help,” Rick reiterated, and Andrea nodded slightly before turning and walking back towards our camp. I felt slight relief as she trudged away.
The front door to the farmhouse had suddenly swung open behind us and we all whipped our heads around simultaneously as Hershel stepped out.
“He’s alright, and ready now if you want to talk with him,” Hershel said stiffly. Rick and Shane stood up from their chairs on the porch and walked through the screen door that Hershel was holding open for them. He looked sternly towards us, emotion gone from his face as he shut the door behind them. Carol and I turned back around, still seated on the porch step.
I was so happy to hear that he would be okay, but I still wanted to see for myself. Anxiety continued to waver in my thoughts.
“He’s going to be alright.” Carol stated. I nodded and looked over at Vinny. He was focused on Carl, who was seated at the picnic table in front of the RV in the distance. “It’s almost time to help Lori start cooking,” she also announced and looked over to me.
I placed my head back in my hands, not noticing that I was bouncing my knees until Carol placed her hand on my thigh to stop it. I was visibly nervous.
“Why don’t you go in and check on him? Vinny and I can help with dinner. Does that sound okay with you, big guy?” Carol suggested and Vinny’s face lit up.
“Can I, Zia?” he asked excitedly, tugging on the hem of my shirt. I smiled to Carol and answered, “Absolutely!” He climbed down from Carol’s lap and stood excitedly in front of us. Carol stood up also.
“Kiss?” I asked, pointing towards my cheek, and I smiled as he quickly ran up and planted a wet kiss on my cheek. He grabbed Carol’s hand, and I watched as they walked towards our camp. I sat impatiently on the porch, drumming my fingers against my lap. After what seemed like hours, Rick and Shane finally emerged from the house and I shot up quickly and turned to face them.
“What happened?” I probed, staring directly in Rick’s eyes. Shane looked at me suspiciously. I didn’t care… he could come to whatever conclusion he wanted to as to why I was so antsy.
“Daryl had an accident. The horse he had borrowed from Hershel threw him and tossed him down a rocky hill, and one of his own arrows pierced him in the fall. Hershel said it didn’t knick anything important, internally.” I nodded.
“Rick, he was shot…” I stated, trying to mask the hysteria in my voice. He stepped closer toward me, a look of incredulity crossed his face and he lightly chuckled.
“The bullet just grazed him…” he started and placed a hand on my shoulder. “…he’s going to be fine, Gianna…” He chuckled again and I could feel myself blushing. I was never good at hiding my emotions, ever, and now the guys knew that I was worried about Daryl. Why was I so worried about Daryl? I hadn’t stopped to realize what it really meant that I was so worried about him. The familiar feeling on uncertainty returned to my gut.
“…that’s good news…” I said, trying to sound indifferent. Rick released my shoulder and turned to follow Shane towards our camp.
“You can go on in and talk to him,” he quickly said over his shoulder as they walked away. I could feel my nerves return as I turned around and walked into the house. Maggie had shown me to the room where he was in and I walked into the opened doorway. I smiled at Maggie as she had left me standing awkwardly in the doorway to Daryl’s room.
I slowly crept in and he turned to face me. We locked eyes and he stared towards me with a gentle demeanor for a quick moment, before it turned into a sour scowl.
“What’re ya doin’ here, princess?” he asked. His voice was weak and he was trying to make it sound rougher than it was. I gave him a small smile, but did not answer.
“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t dead. You looked dead when you stumbled out of the woods.” He had his shirt off and a large bandage was taped to his abdomen. My eyes lingered along the lines of muscle that peeked through his skin around the bandage.
“Well, I ain’t dead,” he said angrily. My gaze returned to his eyes. I was irritated because deep inside, I know that there was no way he could seriously be so angry all the time. Why was he always putting up such an act?
“I’m starting to understand you, Dixon,” I said, smirked, and stepped closer to him. He looked at me, waiting for me to continue.
“I think that this anger and all the bullshit is just easier for you. You’re afraid to feel anything else. You’re afraid to feel…good…” I said, making direct eye contact with him as he rested on the bed in front of me. He looked away, but continued to stay silent.
“I don’t have any idea where you came from, or your past… but I know that whatever happened to you makes you scared to feel happy.” He looked directly towards me, anger burning in his eyes.
“You don’t know nothin’!” he spat angrily, waving his hand at me dismissively. “Leave me the hell alone!” he growled. I took a step back, a little frightened at his intensity, and walked towards the door. He stared directly ahead, fuming in anger.
I walked out of his room and out of the farmhouse, frustration building through me. I thought that maybe I should just forget about him and was beginning to believe that he was a lost cause. For the rest of the evening, I hung around camp, ate, and helped clean up after dinner. I didn’t say much to anyone, and was eager to get to bed that night. Vinny and I had headed to bed early; feelings of defeat had exhausted me.