I'm a User... You're My Drug

I have been staying at Gertrude's house for the last five days. I'd go to work at night and see J afterwards. We would fight and argue most nights then we'd fuck after that. Maybe I'm just a masochist. I ask for it. I pick fights with him on purpose. He had been robbing banks more often lately, each time Batman got closer to catching him. Things were getting worse.

"Hey, Gert, I need to go to the store for some hygiene stuff." I said, walking into the kitchen where she was fixing lunch.

"That's fine, dear, take the Jeep." She smiled. She was always so cheerful.

"Hey, why don't you ride with me, Rhiannon? I was heading to the store myself." Killian said. Killian and I had been getting pretty close over the last few days. He was so nice and told stories about California and the bands he managed and now he is a producer.

"That'd be great!" I said and followed him to the garage. He had an amazing car. An orange Pontiac GTO.

"I love your car, Killian." I said getting in the car.

"Well, thank you. It's one of my babies. I have a few cars." He said as he pulled out of the garage. We then pulled out of the gate and headed to Walmart. 

"That's awesome, I don't even have one car, let alone a few." I laughed. "So, what's it like working with famous people?" I asked.

"Eh, I love the diversity, but I'm used to it really. My father was famous, so we were always hanging out with guys like Ozzy and Motley Crue. It wasn't unusual." 

"I wish I could be a famous rock star. I write my own songs."

"Really? Well, why don't you let me check some of them out?" 

"Really? You would do that?" I asked excitedly.

"Why yeah, I sure would." He said.

We pulled up and parked at Walmart and walked in. We walked around getting everything we needed and talked the whole time. We talked about everything from music to our childhood's. Something J and I never done anymore. We never talked anymore unless we were fighting. Everything was different now. I mean I knew he loved me and I was madly in love with him, but we had no depth. We didn't talk about anything hardly. We didn't talk about the future. I looked down one aisle and saw one of J's henchman. I immediately turned the opposite direction and began speed walking. 

"What's wrong?" Killian asked.

"Just saw someone I don't really want to run in to." I said in a hurry.

"I get that. Well, let's get out of here. Mom's making lunch anyways." We went through the checkout and out the door. I looked over and saw an all too familiar purple car. I turned my head in the other direction and quickly jumped into Killian's car while he put the bags in the trunk. He then got in and sped off without asking any questions. We got back to Gertrude's house and went in. 

"Oh good, you're all home just in time for BLT sandwiches and my homemade macaroni salad." Gertrude said. She already had our plates made up for us.

"Oh thank you so much, Gert." I said sitting down at the bar table. Killian sat down next to me and we ate our lunch before it was time for me to go pick Phoenix up from school. 

"Dear, why don't you just come and live with me. You and Phoenix would be safer here and happy and you would both have your own rooms and I have animals." Gertrude said.

"I just don't want to impose, Gert. You already do enough for us. You already watch Phoenix without pay, you buy us stuff, you feed us, and you treat us like family. You are like wonder woman." I said.

"You are family to me. I want you to come live here."

"Alright, I guess, if you insist."

"Then it's settled. Now you better go pick up my little man. He will be happy to come home and see that I have got him his own pony." 

"Are you serious, Gertrude??" I asked.

"Yes. I am. Now go and tomorrow we will work on getting his school switched."

"Thank you so much, Gert!" I hugged her and grabbed the keys to the Jeep off the wall and ran out the door. I jumped in the Jeep and drove off to pick up my son.

+Joker's P.O.V.+

I sat there in my car and watched her walk into the store with him. Killian. That stupid motherfucker. I could not believe she was seeing another man behind my back, least of all, Killian. I am not letting him move in on what's mine. I will kill that stupid motherfucker. I will kill him right in front of her just to show her. 

I waited there awhile before I saw her come back out with him. She looked worried and in a hurry. She must have seen Will in there. Good. Then she knows I'm watching her every move. I decided I'd see her tonight. No just her though. I would see them all. I would make them beg for their lives.

+Rhiannon's P.O.V.+

I put Phoenix to bed after his bath. He was exhausted after a long day of school and then riding his new pony.  I kissed him goodnight and tucked him in. I then walked out of his room and went to meet Killian in the living room so he could check out the music I wrote. He read over my songs and smiled and looked up at me. 

"Would you go with me?" Killian asked.

"Go with you where?" 

"Back to California. Come back with me and I will help you get your music out there. You and your son could finally have the life you deserve. You are a true musical genius, Rhiannon. This is simply amazing. So who is this song about?" He asked holding up the pages of the lyrics to the song "Love the Way You Lie Part 2" (I know that song is by Rhianna, but it's my story, so it's Amy's song.) 

"Um, it's about the man I've been seeing for the last two months. I love him, but our relationship is really rocky." I explained.

"Who is he?" Killian asked.

"He is me." Out of nowhere, I heard a deep cynical voice and we both stood up to see J standing there. His gun was pointed at Killian.

"What are you doing here, J? How did you know where I was?" I said, scared.

"You're scared? Oh you should be, because I'm about to blow your lover's brains out right in front of you darling." 

"Put that god damn gun down, James." I heard a gun cocked and looked over to see Gertrude pointing a hunting rifle at J. She said his name was James. That must mean...

"This doesn't concern you mother." J turned to look at Gertrude. I was so confused at this point.

"You're in my damn house, boy. You're pointing a gun at your brother. It concerns me. You will put that gun down now, son. You know I'll shoot you where you stand." Gertrude was a total badass. 

At that point, Killian went to rush J, but to no avail. J quickly turned and shot his gun at Killian, hitting him in the side. Killian went down and I heard another shot ring out. I looked over and this time it was J on the ground. Gertrude had shot him in the knee and then took his gun from him. I had never seen J overthrown like that. Maybe it was because it was his mother. 

"Come here, child." Gertrude said to me and I obeyed, running over to her.

"What should I do?" I asked frantically.

"Take this gun, and stay here. I'm going to check on the little one and make a phone call. If he moves, you shoot him." She said and handed me the gun. I nodded to her that I understood her instructions and she went off up the stairs to Phoenix.

"So, this is how it is, Rhiannon? This is how you want it?" J looked up at me. He still looked half crazy. Mostly he looked sad.

"You done this, Joker. I never wanted this to happen. I love you, but I can't do this anymore. I try to say good-bye and I choke. I try to walk away and I stumble. I can't just walk away, but I have to. I have to do what is best for me and Phoenix. This is the way it has to be." My voice shook as I told him that it was over. I began to cry and so did he, silently. Tears rolled down his face, causing his make up to run. Killian got to his feet and stumbled over to the kitchen and got out the first aid kit. He sat at the bar and began trying to dig the bullet out of his side.

"Baby, without you, I'm nothing. I'm so lost. Together we can move mountains, we can live forever together. Our love is crazy, we're nuts. With you, I'm in my mind, but without you I'm out of it. I need you, Rhiannon. You're my life. I just tried to kill my own brother to show you how much I love you." He cried.

"Why didn't you tell me that you had a family? Why didn't you tell me that you knew all along that Gertrude was your mother? The whole time, you knew. You never said anyting. J, I do love you, but we can't be together."

"I didn't tell you, because you didn't want anyone knowing about me. I figured if I kept it to myself, that you wouldn't get scared and leave me. Besides, my family hates me, Rhiannon. I didn't want them to hate you for loving a monster." Joker explained.  Gertrude came down the stairs now, and went to check on Killian first. She then grabbed the tweezers and came over to J.

"We don't hate you son," she said as she knelt down beside him, "we love you dearly. That's why you had to go to the asylum. It's what was best for all of us. You tried to kill me, you tried to kill your brothers and sister. You can't be trusted." Gertrude dug the bullet out of him. At that point, there was a banging at the door.

"What the hell did you do, mother?" Joker growled.

"This is for your own good, son." Gertrude quickly stabbed J with a needle in the neck and he instantly passed out. She patted his head and kissed him on his cheek before she stood up.

"I'm sorry that you had to see that, Rhiannon." She said and walked over to the front door. Just then, Batman and four officers walked in and picked J up off the floor. They took him to a police van and threw him in.

"He's in good hands now, Gert. Don't worry, we will make sure that this time he doesn't escape." Batman said, laying his hand on Gertrude's shoulder. 

"Thank you." She said quietly. She then turned to me and hugged me in a tight grip. I felt so bad for her.

"I'm so sorry, Gert. This is all my fault." I said.

"No, dear, it isn't your fault. It's my fault he is the way he is. I was too hard on him. I drove him away. One day, five years ago, he was out exploring the old abandoned factories after we had got into a fight. I told him to get out and not come back. He went looking for someplace to stay and he fell through a rotted metal walk way and into a vat of acid. Ever since then, he's been crazy. The doctor's said it messed up his brain so bad that there was no going back. Now he's evil. He's a killer." Gertrude told me the story of how Joker got to be this way. He had just had his 25th birthday when it happened. Killian was only 20 at the time.

"It's not your fault, Gertrude. You didn't push him in. Things happen, you can't let it rule your life." I said trying to comfort her.

"I'm his mother, dear. I failed him. Anyways, it is no longer safe for you and Phoenix here. He will get out again and you're the first person he will come after. I know my son,and I know he will come for you. You and Phoenix will leave with Killian tonight and go to California. You'll be safe there. James doesn't know where Killian lives."

"But what about you, Gert?" 

"I'll be fine, dear. I'll go stay with Bruce for awhile. You have to leave though. You'll be safer across the country. You must go pack a bag for you and the boy. Pack only what you need and I'll send the rest of your things. Killian, take the Jeep. There's more room and it's safer. I'll have your car shipped to you. We can't waste any time. It's only a matter of time before James wakes up and breaks out of the asylum again." Gertrude explained.

I didn't waste any time. I listened to what she told me to do. I ran upstairs to Phoenix's room first and got his stuff together and put it in a travel bag. I then ran over to my room and began packing my things. I stopped in my tracks when I saw Joker's jacket laying in the closet. I forgot that I brought it back from the apartment. I picked it up and held it to my face. It still smelled like him. I just stood there for a moment, reminiscing over the good times we had together. I finally came out of my trance and went back to packing. I threw the jacket on, as it was a cold night. I took our bags downstairs and threw them in the back of the Jeep. I then ran back upstairs and scooped up my son and took him down to the car and fastened him in his booster seat. I hugged Gertrude and promised her that I would call her as soon as we made it to Cali. 

"I love you, Gertrude." I said with tears in my eyes.

"I love you, too dear. Now go. Take care of my boy." She gave my one last hug before I jumped in the Jeep. Killian got in the driver's seat after he changed his shirt. He had stitched himself up when I was talking to Joker. We quickly pealed out of the driveway and started our journey to California. I hated leaving my Joker, but I had no choice. I had to do what was best for me and my son. 

"I love you, Joker." I whispered as we sped past Arkham Asylum. 

Would I ever see him again??