Prescription for Miss Walker

It was after five in the morning when I received call after call from Madison. She had clearly heard the news about Ben and wanted to comfort me, but I honestly didn't feel like picking up. After seven or so missed calls, my phone stopped vibrating.

I wanted to phone Ash myself, perhaps reconsider his offer, but I got the feeling he'd have a bitch fit if I did. Not only did I turn him down first time, but then we got into a heated argument that sent him out of the apartment.

I could never win with these people.

Sighing, I sent a text to August, asking if he was free. I didn't get a reply, so I assumed he was working.

About to throw the thing to the other end of the room, it buzzed again. Another call.

I rolled my eyes, why couldn't Madison take the hint sometimes?

I blinked at the bright screen. Blocked number...

Reaching for it and holding it to my ear, I croaked out a weak "hello".

The sound on the other end of the line was high-pitched and proud. There was only one person I knew who forever sounded like they owned the world.

"I'm still in town. Come get a bite to eat." Ben was chipper as usual.

No, no, no. I did not want to see him after yesterday's... proclamation. That was the last thing I needed. After Ash last night too, I was not in the mood to exchange civil conversation with either of my exes.

"I can't go out, Ben. I'm sick." I coughed to stress the point. It started off forced, but halfway through, it developed into a real one. Crackly, it sounded like crushed ice, or the crinkle of a candy wrapper.

"Okay, geez, lucky for you I like you. Open up, I'm at the door."

Blinking, I got up and made way to my door, unlocking it for reasons I did not know. If I wanted to be rational, I'd have kept it sealed shut, but I guess hunger made me stupid.

True to his word, he was there when I opened it. In his arm, he was carrying a bag with a scent so tantalizing.

"You went to Dory's?" I couldn't keep the surprise out of my voice.

He grinned as he walked past me to the kitchen. He started pulling everything out, the bitter stench of smoked bacon attacking my nostrils.

"Of course, love, I know it's your favourite."

Fighting the tug at the corner of my mouth, I stood beside him as I grabbed my sandwich. As I was about to head to the cupboard for some extra salt, he turned and opened it for me. Coming back to me with that same expression as before, I steadily took it from him.

We ate almost in silence, except for every now and then when Ben would let off wind. In spite of myself, I laughed. He seemed to enjoy that I did.

I was all too wary of the fact he was staring at me.

"What?" I asked. Sitting on the couch with Ben was a past time of ours. We hadn't needed to watch the television, or even have music blaring in the background. There was a time when it was just us and nothing else mattered. Funny thing was, I couldn't remember when we stopped being so close, what ultimately drove him to other women.

He shook his head. "Nothing. It's just... I've thought about that laugh a lot. It's nice to hear it again."

Was it wrong that I could feel the heat in my cheeks? He'd been gone for nearly two whole years, yet he still had the power to flatter me.

Ugh, what was I doing? I hated him, why did I continue to sit here with him and pretend we were square?

I inched closer to the edge of the futon, putting as much space as possible between us before he noticed. The closer I was to him, the closer he got to me.

"Why are you really here Ben?" I breathed, meeting his eyes. He opened his mouth to reply, strings of bacon stuck between his teeth. "Don't say it's because you're in love with me either. You had two years to say that to me. Why come back now?"

Chewing lazily, most likely so he could avoid answering for as long as possible, he returned to me every now and then. Overall though, he didn't break contact with me when I was sure he'd try to.

"I didn't know."

The confusion must have been clear on my face, because he set his plate down and redirected himself on the cushion so he was facing me directly.

"I didn't know that I was still in love with you. I thought that, once you finally caught me in a compromising position, I'd be rid of you. As it turns out though, once everything between us was dead and destroyed, I wanted it back again. I was single but not ready to mingle." He shook his head, running his tongue along his teeth. I wouldn't think of who that reminded me of.

"I cheated on you for nothing, because it turns out I was just terrified."

My heart had gone into overdrive, beating so hard it ached to break out of my chest. If he looked at me again, would he be able to see it?

As if in answer, he tentatively rose a hand and placed it over my throat, right by my pulse. I bet it bounced through his fingertips, conjoining with his own that he couldn't discern which was which.

"If I could go back now, I'd change everything. I wouldn't be such a prick and you wouldn't be broken."

I was just about to reply to that when I felt the familiar rough texture of bitten lips fastening themselves upon my own. They tasted nice, peppered lightly and grains of salt left over. Breath hit my nose harder and more chaotic than ever.

I pulled back, holding my hand over my mouth, sight completely fixated on Ben's still figure.

For what could be the first time, he looked panicked. The corners of his mouth upturned in a spasm and he swallowed, hard.

"Shira, I'm sorry, I--"

"Don't say anything. Please make your own way out."

He exhaled in disbelief, worming around in his seat. "Babe, I misread--"

"Ben," Screaming at myself internally how easily he'd manipulated his way in so he could kiss me, I also found myself licking my lips, experiencing the taste of him. "I need time to think about this. About you; everything. I'd rather you leave so I can."

Somewhat snarling, he jumped up from the sofa, a steel expression on his face suddenly. I hated jumping to conclusions, but my skin erupted in goose pimples as he did. My attention was all for him as he rounded back to the island.

Just as I thought it was safe to breathe, he swung an arm out and whacked what was left of our breakfast all over the room. I recoiled, as food slapped against the walls and ground, crashing worse than what our relationship did.

Without another word, he exited the room. The door slammed, sending another tremor through my body. The skin on my arms rose higher, fearing more than just a telling off from a few of my neighbors.

Knowing I couldn't let it perturb me further, I lowered myself down on the coffee table and did as I said I would.

But I did not concentrate on the kiss.