Piece by Piece

Sidney stepped out of the glass shower and grabbed a nearby towel, drying his hair and his body before wrapping the towel loosely around his waist. With Rachel at work, he figured now would be a safe time to come back to their shared home and take a shower. He’d been staying at a teammate’s house for the past week or so, but sometimes, you needed your own shower.

He tousled his damp hair and looked into the mirror at his face. He looked like a mess. His lips were blotchy and chapped, while there were bags under his eyes that no amount of concealer could cover up. He looked exhausted, and he knew his coach was going to give him the third degree for it. He was the team captain and there was no time for him to be off of his game. He was supposed to be the face of the NHL, not the face of sleepless nights.

He moved into the bedroom that he shared with Rachel and pulled open the closet door. Half of his clothes were missing, haphazardly stuffed into a duffel bag that awaited him at his temporary home. He grabbed an old Penguins’ tee and pulled it on, groaning out loud and immediately ripping it off when he discovered that it smelled like Rachel. Like many other women, Rachel had the habit of stealing his tee shirts to wear. Usually he didn't mind and actually found it cute. But right now, it was downright annoying. Some might find the aroma of vanilla enticing, but Sidney grew sick at the smell.

He dug to the bottom of the closet and pulled out a plain white tee shirt, sighing with content when he found it absent of vanilla. He threw it over his head and pulled on a pair of jeans, then moving to close the closet door. He ran a hand through his drying hair and flipped it to the side, making a mental note that his hair was due for a cut. His stubble was growing in longer each day, yet he had no desire to shave it. What was the point?

Sidney grabbed his car keys from the kitchen counter and walked to the front door, closing it behind him as he left home. On second thought, he chuckled, what was home for him now? It used it be this house. It used to be Rachel. And Cole. At least he still had Cole.

He turned the keys in the ignition and pulled out of the driveway, making his way to pick up Cole from hockey practice. With a father like Sidney Crosby, there was no way Cole was getting out of playing hockey. Luckily, he enjoyed playing the sport as much as Sidney had at his age. The only thing that made Sidney happier than playing hockey was watching his son play hockey.

He pulled into the ice complex and parked the truck, making his way into the building. He made small talk with the other parents there to pick up their sons while practice wrapped up. After the coach let them go, the kids ran to their parents and began to leave. Cole made his way up to his father, slowly with his head hanging down. Sidney knew Cole was having a hard time with the situation, and it killed him.

“Hey, kiddo. Good practice today?”

Cole mumbled an answer, sitting in a seat to pull on his sneakers.

“Going to have to speak more clearly if you want me to hear you, Bud.”

Cole sighed quietly and looked up at his father.

“Yeah. Coach has me on the starting lineup next game.”

Sidney moved to give his son a high-five, which caused a tiny smile to break out on Cole’s face. He continued to smile as he tied his sneakers. Cole stood up and pulled his bag over his shoulder. Sidney put his hand on Cole’s shoulder and led him out of the rink, getting back into the car. They sat in silence for a few minutes until Cole spoke up.

“Where are we going?”

Sidney bit his lip and tightened his grip on the wheel.

“Well, your mom is at work, so we’re going to go hang out at Kris’ house until she gets home.”

Cole was silent for a moment, thinking it over.

“Is that where you've been staying?”

Sidney took a deep breath, knowing he was about to get into a deep conversation with his 7 year old. He'd been dreading this conversation, but knew it was a necessary one.

“Yeah, I've been staying with Kris and Catherine and Alex until I get a new place.”

Again, Cole stayed silent. He fidgeted with his hands and met eyes with Sidney in the rear view mirror.

“I don't get it.”

Sidney looked back at his son in the backseat and then returned his eyes to the road in front of him.

“Me and your mom just need some space apart, so I'm staying at Kris’ so that-”

“No. I get why you're there. I just don't get why you're okay with it.”

Sidney shook his head for a moment, wondering how his seven year old seemed to have a better grasp on the subject that even Sidney himself. He was clearly mature beyond his age, and stubborn, both traits he had no doubt inherited from Rachel.

“I mean, Cole, this is tough adult stuff. I don't want you to worry about it.”

Clearly, this wasn't a good enough answer for Cole, because he groaned in the backseat.

“Dad. What do you always tell me?”

Sidney thought for a moment, hoping some humor would get Cole to get off the subject.

“Brush your teeth?”

“No,” Cole said, exhausted. “Never give up on something you want.”

“You love Mom, don't you?”

Sidney fell quiet, remembering something else he always told Cole. Never lie.

“Yeah, Cole. I do love your mother. A lot.”

Cole smiled a little, feeling proud of himself.

“Then why aren't you fighting for her?”

The words hit Sidney. Hard. He didn't respond at that moment. He still hadn't responded when they pulled into the driveway at the Letang house. They walked up the sidewalk and knocked on the door, walking into the vast entranceway of the house. Sidney still hadn't answered. He didn't have an answer. He couldn't think of a single reason why he wasn't fighting. But he could think of a hundred reasons why he should.