Fall From Grace

“So, that was actually pretty fun,” I said as Johnny pulled into his driveway.

“It was, wasn’t it?” Johnny said with a laugh. He seemed surprised. Hell, so was I.

“I guess I better get inside. I need to call Zacky; I haven’t talked to him since the, umm, incident,” I said, dreading having to have that conversation.

“I’m sure everything will work out, he’s a good guy,” he said and I agreed.

“Yeah, well I’ll see you later,” I said, starting to get out of the car.

I had just opened the door when Johnny leaned across the center console and grabbed my arm to stop me. I turned to look at him in confusion.

“Melanie,” he said almost too quietly for me to hear.

He had a conflicted look on his face, like he was fighting himself hard over something. I looked at him curiously. What was his deal?

Finally, he just smiled and said, “Never mind, I’ll call you later on, we can plan our next outing.”

“Sure.”

I got out of the car and shook my head. For a second there, I thought it looked Johnny was going to kiss me or something. Nah, I had to be imagining things. We had just started being friends. It couldn’t be anything other than that.

I climbed the steps to the porch and was rummaging through my bag for the keys when Zacky stepped out in front of me. I didn’t even know he was there. I let out a small scream and dropped my bag on the ground.

“Why do you always do that to me? You jerk!” I yelled, smacking him on his shoulder that was shaking as he laughed. At least he was in a better mood this time.

“I didn’t mean to scare you, I’m sorry,” he apologized, but couldn’t wipe the smile off his face long enough to seem sincere.

“I forgive you, it’s okay,” I told him.

I picked up my purse, found the keys, and let Zacky walk into the house in front of me. I closed the door and walked into the kitchen, grabbing two cans of coke and handing one to Zacky as we both sat down on the couch. I turned on the TV, flipping through the channels, but not finding anything good to watch. So I just left on some random channel for background noise.

“We kinda have something we need to talk about, don’t we?” Zacky asked hesitantly, like he was trying to ease into it like you’d ease into a cold swimming pool.

“We do, but we don’t have to if you don’t want to.” I was just ready to get this over with.

I looked down, playing with a string hanging off of my ripped jeans.

“I’m sorry I kissed you,” he said. He stared down at his knees.

“That’s not even the part I’m worried about, Zack. I want you to tell me everything. I’ve heard it from others, but I want to hear it from you,” I said that, but I really didn’t want to know. I wanted to move on and never talk about this again.

Zack sighed and leaned over, resting his head in his hands.

“I don’t want to say it because it doesn’t matter to you,” he said. That was bullshit and he knew it.

“Zacky, it matters to me because it matters to you. You’re my friend. You're the person I always come to with my problems and the guy who punches people in the face when they take advantage of me. You have to know that you can come to me with anything.”

“Not this, Melanie. It’s the kind of thing that can ruin a friendship.” He still wouldn’t look at me.

“I promise you it won’t Zacky. Things will never be the same if there’s this big elephant in the room every time we’re around each other. We can get through this,” I said.

“I know, but why do I have to say it if you’ve already heard? It’s too hard for me to admit it to other people, much less you,” he said, finally looking at me.

“Okay don’t say it, but is it true?” I asked, even though I didn’t want to hear the answer from him. That would make it too real.

“Yes, Melanie, it’s true and it’s been true for a long time,” he whispered as if that would make it easier to hear.

I exhaled a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding. This was one thing I was not prepared to deal with. How do you get past your best friend being in love with you when you don’t feel the same about him? It didn’t seem like something a friendship could survive through, but I was determined to make it work.

“Oh, Zack. What do we do now?” I asked him.

“We’re friends, we do what friends do. We hang out and have fun together like always. I try to hide my feelings for you like I have for years.”

“Alright, what’s first?” I asked, wanting this conversation to be over.

“Nightmare before Christmas,” he suggested and I smiled. He knew that was my favorite movie.

“Awesome!” I said and sat back on the couch while Zacky got up and put the DVD in the player. We both settled in to enjoy the movie, together as friends.

~x~

Later that night, I was in the middle of tidying up my room a little bit when my cell starting ringing. I checked the caller ID and saw that it was Johnny.

“Hey, new friend,” I said happily as I sank down onto the bed to talk to him.

“I think I have our next activity,” he informed me.

“Okay. So what’s it gonna be?” I asked.

“Okay so the annual fireworks show is tomorrow night, and I figure it’s as good a way as any to spend a Saturday night.” Not a bad idea at all.

“That actually sounds pretty great. I love hanging out on the beach, and fireworks are always good. Plus, we can go to the part of the beach with the park and there are swings!” I said, not trying to hide my excitement.

I started laughing almost as soon as Johnny did. It was surprisingly easy to get along with him and conversation usually flowed easily. It seemed as if we had really been missing out on something good by fighting each other so hard.

“I’m looking forward to it,” Johnny said after the laughing subsided.

“Me too, which is totally amazing considering we hated each other not too long ago,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, but things change, you know. I’ll pick you up at six so we can get a good spot,” he said.

“See you then,” I said before hanging up the phone. I was actually looking forward to spending time with him.