All or Nothing
One
Marriage.
Marriage is supposed to be something that you share with one person for the rest of your lives and hopefully live happily ever after. Growing up, I would read fairytales and dream of having the same love that those girls had. I wanted my Prince Charming to come riding on his horse and sweep me off my feet. I wanted to be able to ride off in the sunset and never have a worry or care. I guess you could say that those princesses really fucked up my life since my life was anything but a fairytale story.
Growing up, my parents were convinced that I was going to fall in love and marry this kid I went to Sunday School with. We did everything together! He would come over to our house and we would play for hours until it was time for him to go home. We spent most of our childhood together but once we hit junior high, we just went our separate ways. He started getting into sports and hanging out with those type of kids and I was a bookworm who could barely get a basketball through the hoop. Another thing I struggled with was the fact that I was the preacher’s daughter and everyone knew how strict my parents were. My sister and I had to be chaperoned by either our father or the other kid’s parents whenever we went out. If my mom and dad didn’t like the person we were going out with, then we weren’t allowed to see them outside of school. The only boys that our father found suitable for us were the ones that went to our church and even some of them were a bit risky.
My father was convinced that even if the kid was a bad egg, if he was to commit himself to the church then he would be saved. I can’t tell you how many guys he brought in from the local high schools and tried to reform. He was able to save some but not all. The ones he did help, he would try to push them off on either me or my older sister. After a while, my sister ended up dating one of them and eventually marrying him. I could never find anyone that peaked my interest, hell I wasn’t even sure what I liked. I had small crushes on guys at my school but that’s about it. I was a plain, dorky girl with curly hair. I was a victim of the early 2000s fashion craze and I always had my face in a book. I may have been friends with a lot of guys, especially those in my grade, but to them I was just Emily McCoy. I didn’t see myself as girlfriend material. I had never even kissed a boy until I was 17 and most of the girls in my grade had already hooked up numerous times. Even my friends had a revolving door and dates, some being from our grade and other being upperclassman. I would hear about the parties they were getting invited too and what all they were doing. I’m not gonna lie and say I wasn’t jealous because I was. I wanted to be able to go out and kiss whoever I wanted and be a teenager for once.
The only serious restriction my father had when it came to dating was that neither my sister or I could ever bring home a Hatfield. According to the media and the rest of the world, the feud between the Hatfield’s and McCoy’s was squashed about 15 years ago, but the hatred between the two families was still there. I guess you could say that the hatred came more from the McCoy side than the Hatfield’s. Everything was somewhat civil until one of the Hatfield family members bought out my Grandfather’s business. It wasn’t like they stole it from him since it was going bankrupt but my family was convinced that the Hatfield’s had stolen it from him. It didn’t make matters any better when the Hatfield’s turned the business around and started making a profit again. It also didn’t make things better when I started getting involved with the most notorious Hatfield there was. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a perfect set of pearly white teeth all belonging to Hawkins Hatfield. He was every girl’s dream and every guy’s worst nightmare. That may sound so cliché but it was the honest truth. Every girl from Pikeville to Logan County wanted a piece of Hawkins and every guy wanted to be just like him. He was the type of guy that could charm your pants off without you even knowing it. Throughout high school I had heard about the infamous Hatfield but I had yet to encounter him in real life. I honestly thought he was made up at one point but that all changed one night while I was at work. My parents had insisted that I get a summer job so I could start saving up for college, so technically me meeting Hawkins was their doing. I had been working at an ice cream shop in the middle of town when him and a couple of his friends came barging through the door. Seeing as I had never seen him before, I had no idea who he was until one of my coworkers filled me in. I unfortunately didn’t have the chance to serve him since the other girls were fighting and fawning over him. Even though it would have been nice to talk to him at least once, I decided to just mind my business and help the others around him. It wasn’t until I was leaving for work when I saw him sitting outside the building. I had ignored him at first, thinking that he was waiting for one of the other girls. Come to find out, he was actually waiting for me and wanted to talk. I had no idea what to say since he was absolutely gorgeous and I knew I wasn’t supposed to be speaking to him. All I could do was look in those blue eyes and regrettably fall in love….
We tried to keep our relationship as private as we could but seeing as we both lived in small towns, word got back to both of our parents. The Hatfield’s were upset about the whole thing but not as upset as my parents were. The first problem was that Hawkins was in fact a Hatfield and the other was that he was several years older than me. I was only 17 years old and still a junior in high school and Hawkins was a 22-year-old without a high school diploma and was notorious for his bad boy ways. I had gone from an innocent bookworm to someone who was sneaking out of the house and spending most of my nights wrapped in the arms of a man my father hated. I guess you could say the icing on the cake was placed when I ran off to West Virginia on my 18th birthday and married Hawkins. We were gone for a number of days and our parents had no idea where we had gone. Neither of us had a cellphone so there was no way for them to contact us or anything. It was actually nice to just spend time with him without having to worry about anyone finding us.
The honeymoon finally came to an end and we had to go back home and face the music. Both of our parents were furious with us and demanded that we annul the marriage. Neither my father nor his wanted a Hatfield or a McCoy in their family and that was the best choice. It would erase the whole thing and no one would ever know it happened. Hawkins and I both threatening to leave and never come back if they kept pushing the issue, which made both of our parents even angrier. It came to a point where my own father kicked me out of the house and told me that I was no longer apart of his family. This was a crushing blow, especially since I was a daddy’s girl from day one. He even went as far as to keeping my mother and sister from speaking to me, leaving me with no family at all except Hawkins.
Hawkins and I tried to do everything we could to keep each other happy but the strain he was having to deal with from his side of the family was making our marriage unbearable. It didn’t make our lives any better by me still being in high school and having to deal with the jealously and hatred the girls in my grade placed upon me. I was so happy when graduation finally came so I could finally get away from all the harsh words and looks. I thought by me graduating and all, Hawkins and I would be able to have the perfect life. I guess perfect lives only exists in fairytales and movies. We were only married for 6 months when I caught him in bed with some girl with blonde hair and tan skin. She was opposite of everything I was and to be honest, she was a hell of a lot prettier too. I didn’t know what to do at that point. I couldn’t go back home since my father didn’t want anything to do with me and the rest of my family was no longer speaking to me. I had no friends to turn to since they all dumped me since Hawkins became my only concern in the world. I had no were to go except the airport and spend what little money I did have on a plane ticket out of West Virginia and to a place where no one knew who I was.
I guess that brings me to the present.
I ended up moving to San Francisco and getting my degree in Mass Communications, earning a job as an editor for a highly recognized fashion magazine. Who would have thought that the girl who wore gauchos and velour jumpsuits with rhinestone sayings on the ass would have gotten a job as an editor at a fashion magazine! I had finally made a name for myself without the help of anyone else and it was a great feeling. I had plenty of new people in my life that considered me to be their family and had also managed to meet the love of my life. Bentley had been the first person I had met when I first moved and we instantly hit it off. He was the complete and total opposite of Hawkins. Dark hair, green eyes, and driven. He was in law school when we met and within two years, he had a degree and I had an engagement ring on my left hand. We made sure to wait our engagement, taking things slow and planning everything just right. The only problem, among many, was that I was still married to Hawkins and Bentley kept insisting that we go to Kentucky to meet my family. He had no idea about my past except a few minor details that I let slip through after a couple glasses of wine. He knew that I had dated Hawkins but didn’t know that I was actually and still am married to him. I guess I was so upset that I had caught him with that girl that I just left and made my mind forget about everything in Kentucky and West Virginia.
The other major problem I was having at the moment was that I was currently on a plane to Kentucky with Bentley in toe to not only meet my parents but to try my best to get this marriage annulled before my husband-to-be finds out that I had been lying to him for the past four years….
Marriage is supposed to be something that you share with one person for the rest of your lives and hopefully live happily ever after. Growing up, I would read fairytales and dream of having the same love that those girls had. I wanted my Prince Charming to come riding on his horse and sweep me off my feet. I wanted to be able to ride off in the sunset and never have a worry or care. I guess you could say that those princesses really fucked up my life since my life was anything but a fairytale story.
Growing up, my parents were convinced that I was going to fall in love and marry this kid I went to Sunday School with. We did everything together! He would come over to our house and we would play for hours until it was time for him to go home. We spent most of our childhood together but once we hit junior high, we just went our separate ways. He started getting into sports and hanging out with those type of kids and I was a bookworm who could barely get a basketball through the hoop. Another thing I struggled with was the fact that I was the preacher’s daughter and everyone knew how strict my parents were. My sister and I had to be chaperoned by either our father or the other kid’s parents whenever we went out. If my mom and dad didn’t like the person we were going out with, then we weren’t allowed to see them outside of school. The only boys that our father found suitable for us were the ones that went to our church and even some of them were a bit risky.
My father was convinced that even if the kid was a bad egg, if he was to commit himself to the church then he would be saved. I can’t tell you how many guys he brought in from the local high schools and tried to reform. He was able to save some but not all. The ones he did help, he would try to push them off on either me or my older sister. After a while, my sister ended up dating one of them and eventually marrying him. I could never find anyone that peaked my interest, hell I wasn’t even sure what I liked. I had small crushes on guys at my school but that’s about it. I was a plain, dorky girl with curly hair. I was a victim of the early 2000s fashion craze and I always had my face in a book. I may have been friends with a lot of guys, especially those in my grade, but to them I was just Emily McCoy. I didn’t see myself as girlfriend material. I had never even kissed a boy until I was 17 and most of the girls in my grade had already hooked up numerous times. Even my friends had a revolving door and dates, some being from our grade and other being upperclassman. I would hear about the parties they were getting invited too and what all they were doing. I’m not gonna lie and say I wasn’t jealous because I was. I wanted to be able to go out and kiss whoever I wanted and be a teenager for once.
The only serious restriction my father had when it came to dating was that neither my sister or I could ever bring home a Hatfield. According to the media and the rest of the world, the feud between the Hatfield’s and McCoy’s was squashed about 15 years ago, but the hatred between the two families was still there. I guess you could say that the hatred came more from the McCoy side than the Hatfield’s. Everything was somewhat civil until one of the Hatfield family members bought out my Grandfather’s business. It wasn’t like they stole it from him since it was going bankrupt but my family was convinced that the Hatfield’s had stolen it from him. It didn’t make matters any better when the Hatfield’s turned the business around and started making a profit again. It also didn’t make things better when I started getting involved with the most notorious Hatfield there was. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a perfect set of pearly white teeth all belonging to Hawkins Hatfield. He was every girl’s dream and every guy’s worst nightmare. That may sound so cliché but it was the honest truth. Every girl from Pikeville to Logan County wanted a piece of Hawkins and every guy wanted to be just like him. He was the type of guy that could charm your pants off without you even knowing it. Throughout high school I had heard about the infamous Hatfield but I had yet to encounter him in real life. I honestly thought he was made up at one point but that all changed one night while I was at work. My parents had insisted that I get a summer job so I could start saving up for college, so technically me meeting Hawkins was their doing. I had been working at an ice cream shop in the middle of town when him and a couple of his friends came barging through the door. Seeing as I had never seen him before, I had no idea who he was until one of my coworkers filled me in. I unfortunately didn’t have the chance to serve him since the other girls were fighting and fawning over him. Even though it would have been nice to talk to him at least once, I decided to just mind my business and help the others around him. It wasn’t until I was leaving for work when I saw him sitting outside the building. I had ignored him at first, thinking that he was waiting for one of the other girls. Come to find out, he was actually waiting for me and wanted to talk. I had no idea what to say since he was absolutely gorgeous and I knew I wasn’t supposed to be speaking to him. All I could do was look in those blue eyes and regrettably fall in love….
We tried to keep our relationship as private as we could but seeing as we both lived in small towns, word got back to both of our parents. The Hatfield’s were upset about the whole thing but not as upset as my parents were. The first problem was that Hawkins was in fact a Hatfield and the other was that he was several years older than me. I was only 17 years old and still a junior in high school and Hawkins was a 22-year-old without a high school diploma and was notorious for his bad boy ways. I had gone from an innocent bookworm to someone who was sneaking out of the house and spending most of my nights wrapped in the arms of a man my father hated. I guess you could say the icing on the cake was placed when I ran off to West Virginia on my 18th birthday and married Hawkins. We were gone for a number of days and our parents had no idea where we had gone. Neither of us had a cellphone so there was no way for them to contact us or anything. It was actually nice to just spend time with him without having to worry about anyone finding us.
The honeymoon finally came to an end and we had to go back home and face the music. Both of our parents were furious with us and demanded that we annul the marriage. Neither my father nor his wanted a Hatfield or a McCoy in their family and that was the best choice. It would erase the whole thing and no one would ever know it happened. Hawkins and I both threatening to leave and never come back if they kept pushing the issue, which made both of our parents even angrier. It came to a point where my own father kicked me out of the house and told me that I was no longer apart of his family. This was a crushing blow, especially since I was a daddy’s girl from day one. He even went as far as to keeping my mother and sister from speaking to me, leaving me with no family at all except Hawkins.
Hawkins and I tried to do everything we could to keep each other happy but the strain he was having to deal with from his side of the family was making our marriage unbearable. It didn’t make our lives any better by me still being in high school and having to deal with the jealously and hatred the girls in my grade placed upon me. I was so happy when graduation finally came so I could finally get away from all the harsh words and looks. I thought by me graduating and all, Hawkins and I would be able to have the perfect life. I guess perfect lives only exists in fairytales and movies. We were only married for 6 months when I caught him in bed with some girl with blonde hair and tan skin. She was opposite of everything I was and to be honest, she was a hell of a lot prettier too. I didn’t know what to do at that point. I couldn’t go back home since my father didn’t want anything to do with me and the rest of my family was no longer speaking to me. I had no friends to turn to since they all dumped me since Hawkins became my only concern in the world. I had no were to go except the airport and spend what little money I did have on a plane ticket out of West Virginia and to a place where no one knew who I was.
I guess that brings me to the present.
I ended up moving to San Francisco and getting my degree in Mass Communications, earning a job as an editor for a highly recognized fashion magazine. Who would have thought that the girl who wore gauchos and velour jumpsuits with rhinestone sayings on the ass would have gotten a job as an editor at a fashion magazine! I had finally made a name for myself without the help of anyone else and it was a great feeling. I had plenty of new people in my life that considered me to be their family and had also managed to meet the love of my life. Bentley had been the first person I had met when I first moved and we instantly hit it off. He was the complete and total opposite of Hawkins. Dark hair, green eyes, and driven. He was in law school when we met and within two years, he had a degree and I had an engagement ring on my left hand. We made sure to wait our engagement, taking things slow and planning everything just right. The only problem, among many, was that I was still married to Hawkins and Bentley kept insisting that we go to Kentucky to meet my family. He had no idea about my past except a few minor details that I let slip through after a couple glasses of wine. He knew that I had dated Hawkins but didn’t know that I was actually and still am married to him. I guess I was so upset that I had caught him with that girl that I just left and made my mind forget about everything in Kentucky and West Virginia.
The other major problem I was having at the moment was that I was currently on a plane to Kentucky with Bentley in toe to not only meet my parents but to try my best to get this marriage annulled before my husband-to-be finds out that I had been lying to him for the past four years….