Status: Heartbreak Warning

Remember? Last Summer

For What Felt Like the First Time

Forgive me for staring, but I can see galaxies in your eyes.

I can feel the ocean waves crash, and smell an exotic aroma that could only mean it is you who is holding me. I can taste fresh mints and hear you moan as our lips collide in perfect sync. We could dance for hours, maybe even days and let time be an illusion.
Your arms are a vault that keep me safe; your eyes keep me chained so you can protect me; your smile provides warmth like the sun and your laugh provides music; your voice tells me stories and secret truths made only for my ears; your chest pounds so loudly, it's as though my butterflies can be found in your chest.

Of all these beautiful sentiments, it still could not portray all the intricate divine imperfections of your being. I could travel the world a thousand times, and still miss only the firmness of our bodies together; the plains of your back as my nails dig into you. I would miss the galaxies and oceans hiding within your blue eyes, that stare into mine and I'll wonder if you've found what you are looking for. I would miss the sound of your voice as we laugh, and not a single song in this world could replace its imprint on my brain.

Much like a stone carving in my mind, that is where you reside.

For what felt like the first time in years, I saw you today. You always leave me so breathless. You're calm, cool and collected - much like the first day we met 10 years ago. There's someone else in your life now that you hold with those arms, and keep captivated with that gaze. I could only hope - no - pray that she feels as entranced in your gaze as I do. I could only pray that she feels as protected and safe, and can see the galaxies and feel the ocean crashing. I could only pray that when you speak, she falls silent and takes in every damn moment and word that falls from your mouth upon her ears. That when you two kiss, it's an unbreakable dance that she finds heavily intoxicating, that makes it near impossible to breathe, and she falls even more in love with you.

I pray, that one day, down another road, that you'll come back to me, as I will still be waiting on that lonesome road like the day we met.

I could not fathom the pain I would feel missing you. It's as though time moved too quickly for me to see that you would grow, and without me, too. It moved too soon for me to cherish every kiss, every word, every captivating, soul-wrenching, heart-pumping gaze.

Those oceans in your eyes...

Today, you looked at me with nothing. Today, your life is how you wanted it all along, with a girl that would stick with you through thick and thin. Today would have been near 6 years of us together.
Today is not yet a year and a half for you and her.

I rejoice in your happiness, your accomplishments and revel in your smiles and warmth, even though it was not even five minutes. I will feed off this feeling for at the very least, a month. It has opened old wounds, the realization of losing you, and watching your life move by in flash cars and a functional life.

If the opportunity were to show itself, I would not miss the chance to chase you again.

This hole that was left 2 years ago, created with my own hands, has gotten bigger and I didn't see that until now.

I hope to see you again, old friend. To see those galaxies, and hear those oceans.

To feel the vaults, and chains.

And to hear your voice.

And for what would feel like the first time, a bittersweet kiss in perfect sync.