Crash Into Me

{Matt’s Point of View}

For once today Val was the last thing on my mind, even though she tried calling every hour. Charlie kept all my attention as I learned more and more about her, which didn’t leave much time to worry about my marriage. Charlie reminded me so much of River when he was little especially her curiosity. But she was passed out now from a long day of fun.

We ate lunch at Olive Garden, so Charlie could get her white noodle fix. Once she got started talking there was no way to stop her. It was amazing how much I already loved her.

Katy, though, didn’t really have much to say and when she did say something it was regarding Charlie. Which I understood to a degree. This whole thing was supposed to revolve around our daughter. But we were best friends before our lives became a mess.

“Everything okay?” I quietly asked looking over at Katy as the yellow light turned red, “You’ve been really quiet.”

Katy nodded her head then turned her head to look back out the window, “Was just thinking about something.”

“What about?” I questioned.

“Nothing too important,” She answered. Should I pry or leave it alone? Katy looked back at me and opened her mouth as if she was going to say something but then shut it.

“You can-”

“Does Val know you are with us?” She questioned already sounding angry.

“No,” I answered. I should’ve said more but Katy started shaking her head.

“Same Matt just a different year,” She scoffed.

“No, let me-”

“For some reason, I always have hope for you. That you’ll change and become the man I know you can be,” She whispered angrily trying not to wake Charlie, “Every time I wish and pray that I was with you. I think about it and then I’m thankful I’m not because I don’t know if I could do with you keeping secrets from me.”

I waited a minute before saying anything because Katy was famous for cutting you off in an argument to say her peace, but she wasn’t done.

“Do you think we need this in our life? To be some secret mission on the side? I mean damn Charlie and I have been through a lot and we don’t need to be someone’s second choice.” She opened the door as soon as I put my truck in park. I thought she’d at least stay for a minute to hear me out.

Quickly, I jumped out of my truck without turning the ignition off to meet Katy as she went from her side to the door behind mine where Charlie was in the booster seat. I placed my hand on the door so she wouldn’t open it, “Listen to me for a second.”

If Katy had lasers in her eyes I’d be dead, “Let me get my daughter.”

“She’s our daughter, A. B, you sat there and gave your opinion on your assumption. Shut up for a second and let me get out what I need to tell you. If you don’t agree with me after I’ve said my side then you can go on your merry way. Doesn’t change the fact that Charlie is also mine and I will see her still,” It was the most courage I’ve had in a while. But they were worth fighting for.

“Fine,” She breathed even though her stance still looked angry.

“I didn’t tell Val about Friday when you first invited me over because I didn’t want it to be too good to be true. Also, I didn’t want to feel guilty for seeing my first daughter for the first time,” I explained calmly, careful not to add any fuel to the fire.

“Okay, but it’s Sunday and she still doesn’t-”

“I’m not done,” I sighed. Katy was so stubborn, “So we had a get together Saturday and I didn’t want to bring it on her with everyone around because then it would be a big huge dramatic ordeal. Now, I think we’re over for good. I can’t be with her anymore,” I confessed. Katy looked down then back up at me.

“Why?” She asked her voice now soft.

“We were having sex and as we were almost finishing up she screamed Jeff. I’ve had my suspicions but I’ve never caught her. There’s not much to go from, but I’m just not happy anymore. I’m going to leave her,” It was the first time I had said it out loud and it hit me hard. Tears filled in my eyes but I wiped them and pulled myself together.

“Wow, Matt. I’m so sorry,” Kate sighed then she hugged me. I of course hugged her back. It was the first time that she had hugged me since being back. Vanilla and coconut filled my lungs, like it used to. As long as I’ve known Katy she had used the same collection of smells.

Our hug had probably lasted longer than it should have, but neither of us were moving. I began to wonder what was running through her mind.

“I’ve missed you,” I whispered in her ear as I rested my chin on her shoulder.

“I’ve missed you too,” She replied smiling into my neck. It was real intimate, but before I could get any ideas Katy pulled away.

“I’m glad you came back into my life, Kate. You may not be able to go back to Florida,” I laughed and opened the truck door to grab Charlie for her.

“Or maybe you’ll just have to go with us,” She winked. We both knew neither would happen but it was fun to believe so for the next week or so.