In Joy and Sorrow

Anna stared at Ville’s face like a deer in headlights, she had absolutely no idea how to address him without letting slip how much of a fan of HIM she was. Her cheeks were burning with an intense blush that was no doubt spreading over her entire face as Ville regarded her with a neutral look. She sent a panicked glance over to Tilo who merely grinned like the cheshire cat and continued to talk to the person next to him.

“So….” Anna trailed off trying to think of something, anything, to break the silence that settled between Ville and her. “I didn’t know HIM was performing at Hellfest this year.” She finally shoved the words out of her mouth, relief that she hadn’t exclaimed something along the lines of she didn’t know his eyes were so purely emerald green, or his hair fell in perfect curls around his face.

Ville gave her a soft smile that reached up to crinkle the sides of his eyes. “It was a last minute thing. We only decided to come last week actually.” He said nothing more and Anna struggled to find something to continue on, damn him, it was almost like he could feel how much she was struggling and found it amusing.

“Ah, I’m glad you decided to come- I mean to say that all the best bands perform here and obviously HIM is an amazing band.” She could punch herself as the words tumbled out of her mouth. “Uh, I think I’m going to actually go follow Rob to the bar, a drink sounds great right about now.” She shoved herself to her feet and all but power walked through the crowd, ignoring the amused smirks of her friends.

Anna found Rob leaning against the bar, that was surprisingly not packed with people. She grabbed a stool next to him and let her arms fold on the counter before dropping her head on them with a groan. Anna couldn’t do cool, she couldn’t do chill, she was an anxious little rabbit that had no idea how she was going to navigate this week with Ville being around.

“Already embarrass yourself ey?” Rob asked looking over to her and she groaned again nodding her head. “Why don’t you just treat him like you do the rest of us?” Anna raised her head to give him and incredulous look, to which he held up his hands in defense. “All I’m saying is that is one reason you were able to become friends will all of us here, you treated us all like we were regular guys.”

Anna sighed and shook her head. “I wish I could, but I just spent a minute next to the man and it was all I could do to not have an aneurysm. Either I’m going to need to stay completely sloshed all weekend, or figure out some way to tone down my fan level.” Rob chuckled beside her and took a sip from his beer.

“You could always just tell him how big a fan you are.” He offered and she kicked him in the thigh.

“Why the hell would I do that, the last thing I want him thinking is that I’m just another fan!” She hissed in reply.

“Darling there is no way anyone could mistake you for just another fan.” Rob assured her and waved the bartender over signaling for another beer. “My best advice is just be you, you’re a doll and everyone loves you, I’m sure Ville will adore you even if he finds out you’re a huge fan.” He handed the new beer from the bartender over to Anna and turned her around, pushing her back towards their little crowd. Anna strengthened her resolve, she could do this, she could make it through the weekend without making a fool of herself. She was a HIM fan, but she was also a fan of all of her friends bands, if she just took deep breaths she could get through this… Hopefully.

Kosmo perked up at the sight of their return and when she was within reach plucked her beer from her hand for a quick sip. Anna smacked him on the side of his head and grabbed her beer back sticking her tongue out at his hurt look. She lifted one hip onto the side of a table and took another sip of her drink.

“Next time ask before you take.” She scolded and he nodded demurely at her, instantly making her suspicions rise. Kosmo was anything but demure, he had to be up to something.

“What rooms is everyone in?” The smooth Finnish accent rolled from behind her and she couldn’t help the squeak of surprise that slipped through her lips, not having seen Ville around the spot she chose.

“615.” Tilo supplied, barely looking up from his phone to reply.

“613 and 617 is all of us.” Kosmo spoke for HIM.

“620 and 622 for us.” Joakim raised a beer as did the rest of the Sabaton members.

“630 for me.” Rob included between sips of his beer.

Ville had come around to her side and gave her a glance. “What room are you staying in, darling?” Anna nearly choked on air when he addressed her as darling, covering it by swallowing her beer incorrectly.

“Ah, I’m in 612, it looks like we all ended up on the same floor.” She tried to hide her embarrassed blush with a bright smile.

“It looks like we will be neighbors,” He corrected sending her a dazzling smile. “I’ve already called a bed in 613.” She took a deep breath through her nose and kept her smile firmly in place even though inside she was screaming. She could do this! Keep calm, treat him like she did everyone else, he was just a man!

Anna hopped to her feet, finishing off her beer and leaving it on the table. “Speaking of rooms, I’ve yet to be in mine so I’m going to head up.”

“Same!” Tilo agreed and a few others agreed with her decision to head up to the rooms.

Anna centered herself and took a breath for confidence, she turned to Ville before she left. “I’ll see you later, just knock if you need anything neighbor.” She sent him a smile and walked to the elevator, not bothering to put a strut in her walk, because, how ridiculous would it look for her to sashay off in a god damn onsey.

She could have high fived herself for how suave she was, perhaps she could do this whole treat Ville like regular person thing. Her small crew of five musicians and her commandeered an elevator that had just arrived and slipped in taking up all the space before others could join. As she turned to jab her finger at the six button she found Ville’s eyes in the crowd, he was looking at her with an amused expression and just before the doors slid closed he raised a hand in departure.

They were barely to the second floor when Tilo slid up next to her. “Sooooo…” He trailed off looking at her with a grin splitting his face.

“So?” Anna asked back, raising an eyebrow at him. Tilo was a very dear friend of hers but he could be trouble, sticking his nose where it didn’t belong.

“So! Are you going to make your move on your ultimate Finnish fantasy boy?” Tilo asked exasperated and a their companions in the lift chuckled.

Anna shook her head at her friend, rolling her eyes. “No, I’m going to play it cool, treat him like just another person, that way when he finds out I’m a fan he won’t be completely freaked out.” Or so she hoped, she would really hate to have Ville dismiss her as just a fan if she had the option to become a friend with him. Yes she adored him and faithfully listened to his music, but she would have to keep her shit under control this weekend.

“I think he would find it cute that you’re a fan.” Tilo argued but Joakim placed a hand on the shorter man’s shoulder.

“Let Anna be, you already know no one can resist her charms, I’m sure she’ll romance Ville without even meaning to.” Anna gave him an incredulous look as the doors opened to the lift.

“You all have way too much faith in me, I’m just a girl that’s really good at makeup and amusing when drunk.” She brushed off Joakim’s comment as she headed down the hall for her room, pulling the room keys out of her giant onsey pockets. “As much as I would love for you to continue bombarding me with compliments I’m gonna shower and change into something that looks semi normal.” They were already continuing down the hall towards their own rooms. “Text me if you plan anything!” She shouted down the hall at them and a few raised their hands in acknowledgment.

Anna managed to shower, put on a casual amount of makeup, curl her hair, and settle in for a half hour nap before a banging at her door pulled her from sleep. Groaning she rolled out of bed and staggered over to the door, technically it was time for her to be sleeping back home, but she didn’t have the luxury of complaining about time difference when she was surrounded by Europeans that operated on varying time zones all the time.

A grinning Kosmo was waiting at her door and she left it open as she turned to head back to her bed, not bothering to be welcome as she tried to wake up. Anna had gotten quite lucky with her room, it was a single queen bed, a large couch and chair against the wall and a dresser kitty corner from them. The bathroom was large and had a jetted tub, which she couldn’t wait to test, and the lighting was perfect for doing makeup. She heard more people than Kosmo shuffle in after her and she realized that her door would have to be left unlocked this week if she didn’t want to answer the door every few minutes.

She sat down at the had of her bed, Joakim pushing through everyone to get a running jump on the bed and landing face down. Anna chuckled at her friend as everyone found placements around the room, it seems that most of the people she had been with earlier in the day had decided that her room would be the new meeting point. Kosmo gave Joakim a shove so that he could occupy another spot on the bed and Tilo took the open spot next to Anna at the head of the bed. Rob was sitting on the dresser, Linde and Mige of HIM were fighting over the chair, all of Sabaton had piled onto the couch, which she was sure wasn’t made to handle that much weight.

Ville looked around for a second trying to find a space that wasn’t occupied or being fought over and Anna received a jab to her ribs from Tilo. He gave her a meaningful look and jerked his head towards Ville before scooting so he was barely on the edge of the bed. Anna licked her lips and moved over as well, leaving plenty of space at the had of the bed for another body.

“Ville,” He looked over at her as she called his name. “Come join us.” She patted the empty spot they had made for him and he gave a grateful smile before coming over to sit next to her. The bed was large but five people was enough to make the bed cramped and as he sat down his arm brushed against hers and she was enveloped with the scent of his cologne and the smell of smoke.

Joakim had Kosmo in a headlock at the foot of the bed and the Finn was struggling to break out of the grasp. “So, what shall we do our first night in France?” Joakim questioned and Anna let out a laugh.

“More like what shall our motley crew destroy first?” She corrected and most of the people in the room laughed at her accurate correction.

“We should go to a pub.” Linde and Mige said at the same time even though they were still fighting over ownership of her chair.

“Let’s go to a club.” Joakim offered finally releasing Kosmo from his headlock when the Finn tapped on his arm twice conceding in defeat.

“Let’s go look around the town.” Rob offered, but she already knew most of the men in the room were still too rowdy to enjoy something so laid back.

“We could go down to the lobby again.” Tilo offered and she glanced at him with a quirked eyebrow. “What there’s booze and chairs, and I bet fantastic people watching.”

“You all have no imagination.” Anna chided and pulled her phone from her back pocket, making sure to angle the screen away from Ville until she had it unlocked and a search browser opened, keeping his eyes from seeing the heartagram that was her current background. She searched for things to do around her, a lot of tours around the historic castles peaked her interest but it was too late for most of them. After a minute of scrolling through things she groaned and locked her phone again, dropping it in her lap.

“I give up, it’s too late for most things.” She adjusted herself in the bed making her arm brush against Ville’s.

“Why don’t we compromise, we can take a walk through town and break off to go to a pub or club, or come back as we want?” Ville’s idea made the most sense but Anna was hesitant to unleash her friends on the unwitting French town, she would like to keep an eye on them to minimize the damage that would be caused before the festival started. A mumble of approval sounded and people began to push back out through the door to her room, Joacim had Kosmo back in a headlock and was dragging him out the door, followed closely by Linde and Mige who caused a brief delay as they tried to push through at the same time. Tilo bounced off of the bed and bumped Anna into Ville who glanced down at her with a smile.

Standing he turned to offer her his hand. “Shall we darling?” He asked and Anna couldn’t keep her breath from hitching, him and those damn pet names. She had no doubt he used them with probably everyone, but with them directed at her she couldn’t help but internally rejoice some. She slid her hand into his and he helped her from the bed, she was grateful that she had chosen to wear foundation instead of BB cream, usually her blush was hidden when she wore foundation and she had no doubt right now that her face was becoming red under the cream that it was painted.

Ville and her were the last to leave the room and he closed the door behind them, not taking her hand again however he did walk next to her as they went to join their friends. She could do this, the more time she spent around Ville the easier it was to control her burst of joy at being so near him. Everyone decided to try and cram into a single elevator even though the sign above the floors distinctly said that the capacity was eight bodies, they were nearly double that, and she could only hope that the elevator didn’t get stuck as the doors slid together in front of her.