Status: Weekly updates - planning a rewrite for the earlier chapters soon

Wilted

Poinsettia

It took five minutes of staring blankly at a wall before James coughed, dragging my eyesight from the ever so interesting off-white wall to his perfectly composed face. His blond hair lay lightly waved over his left eyebrow that somehow seemed more well managed than any hair on my body. How pretentious that eyebrow was.

“The first step to CBT, Katherine.” He paused, as if letting me take the time to realise he had the power in the room. “Is opening up and helping us realise where your anger comes from.”

I didn’t make a move, my silent attempt to challenge the power he thought he had.

He ignored my lack of response and carried on. “So, why not start with why you’re here.”

James looked at me expectantly.

“Did you not read my file?” I replied. “Seems you’re a rather inept nurse if you can’t even do the basic paperwork.”

James let out a laugh. It was too sweet for the room, for the mood, for his frame, and it made me feel sick.

“This is about how you feel you ended up here, Kat. Why do you think you ended up on the route that brought you here? What made you behave the way you did?” James asked, the lightness of laughing still slicked through his voice.

I dismissively shrugged, “I was sent here instead of prison.”

James let the words hang in the air. He watched me intensely, waiting for me to continue, as if that statement was so revolutionary to me that some form of holy epiphany would strike down on me and make me see the wrongs I had done.

But I knew exactly what I did. I held no false pretences about every event that led me to this place. I had nothing to feel sorry for, nothing to change. They expected some renaissance of self. Expected me to raise like the first flower after the fire burnt down the forest. Though I was not the flower here. I was the bitch who burnt everything down.
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Hey look, I updated. Exams are over and I'm actually writing again. Hallelujah.

Start my new job tomorrow. Kind of ridiculously excited.